Shining Time Station: Once Upon a Time (1995 TV Movie)

George Carlin: Mr. Conductor

Quotes 

• Mr. Conductor : [Writing in his diary late at night]  Dear diary, there's only one way to begin this story. "Once upon a time..."

  [Scene transitions to earlier that day] 

  Mr. Conductor : ... because, it was Founder's Day, the day when we celebrate the history of Shining Time Station, I was up bright and early, trying to get things ready. I'd shampooed the pigeons, and cleaned out the Wishing Well, and I'd just begun another job...

• Mr. Conductor : [voiceover]  Meanwhile, dear diary, deep inside the station jukebox, and unknown to anyone but me, the Jukebox Puppet Band were about to be rudely awakened...

• Mr. Conductor : Well, diary, Becky had made a wish to meet a real cowboy from long ago, and her wish had come true. Now I had Mr. Ned Kincaid from a hundred years ago to worry about. And I wasn't the only one worried...

• Mr. Conductor : Stacy and Ned Kincaid were definitely falling in love. And neither of them knew that, in just a few hours, Ned was going to disappear; back into the mural as a painting on the wall. But should I tell her? Should I tell him? And there were other problems at Shining Time Station, too...

• Mr. Conductor : [voiceover]  Diary, time was running out. The day was almost over. I had to talk to Ned Kincaid.

• Mr. Conductor : [Voiceover]  Diary, as you know, there was nothing I could do to change the Wishing Star's magic. And Ned Kincaid hadn't even had time to write Stacy that letter explaining things. But as you and I know, diary, there are all kinds of magic in this world.

  Mr. Kincaid : [walks in]  Beg pardon, ma'am.

  [Stacy turns to look at him] 

  Mr. Kincaid : I seem to have missed my train. I was wondering if there was some way I could get a ride into town.

  Stacy Jones : Oh, sure. I'll take you. That's no trouble.

  Mr. Kincaid : Thank you so much.

  Stacy Jones : I'm sorry, you look very familiar to me. Have we met?

  Mr. Kincaid : No, I can't say that we have. My name is Kin...

  Stacy Jones : [interrupting]  Kincaid.

  Mr. Kincaid : [Taking his glasses off]  Kincaid, that's right! Now, how did you know that?

  Stacy Jones : Oh, well, once upon a time, I... I knew a relative of yours. I think. At least, you look exactly like him.

  Mr. Kincaid : Well, now, my great-grandfather, Ned, came from around here. But, I can't imagine that you ever met him. That was a *long* time ago.

  Stacy Jones : Well, it... it doesn't seem possible. Does it?

  [She and Mr. Kincaid walk out together, laughing] 

  Mr. Conductor : [the scene dissolves back to Mr. C writing in his diary late at night]  Diary, I think there's a good chance that Stacy, and everybody else, is going to live Happily Ever After. Good night.

  [Blows out the candle he was using to see]