The Ridiculous 6 (2015)
Adam Sandler: Tommy
Photos
Quotes
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Ramon : So, do you new brothers have any special skills that could help us out here tonight?
Chico : Like what?
Ramon : Like you know, Tommy's good with knives, Lil Pete's got a bonus nipple, I got a burro, Herm is good at strangling.
Danny : I can hold my breath for six minutes.
Chico : Well, I can play the piano with my dick.
Tommy aka White Knife : Well, we're unstoppable then.
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Never Wears Bra : [Walks out of her tepee and stretches] Good morning, boys,
Tommy aka White Knife : Good morning, Never Wears Bra.
Never Wears Bra : I had dream about you last night, White Knife.
Tommy aka White Knife : Oh, that's nice.
Never Wears Bra : Not nice dream. In dream you naughty, you naughty, White Knife.
Frank Stockburn : Somebody's got an admirer!
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Tommy aka White Knife : I'm in a bit of a bind, boys. I rode all the way out here to pan for gold and my horse up and died on me.
Rifleman : How'd he die?
Tommy aka White Knife : Suicide. Drowned himself. Put his head in the stream and just kept it there. Saddest thing you ever seen.
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Ramon : My mother's Swedish.
Tommy aka White Knife : I don't think so. I reckon she's Mexican.
Ramon : Lying bitch!
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Tommy aka White Knife : [Running between base plates] Where you going, nobody hit it.
Abner DoubleDay : I stole the base. You weren't looking so I stole it.
Chico : You said you could only advance after you hit the ball!
Abner DoubleDay : Not when you're stealing.
Short Stop : That's bullshit.
Abner DoubleDay : OK, Short Stop.
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Tommy aka White Knife : Any of you handsome brothers ready to go steal a big hunk of gold?
Chico : I'm ready.
Ramon : I'm hungry.
Danny : I'm drunk.
Lil' Pete : And I'm Lil Pete.
Herm : [unintelligible]
Tommy aka White Knife : Let's get that nugget then...
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[last lines]
Lil' Pete : Dear Mama, so much has changed since my last letter. I scarcely know where to begin. First off, it turns out our daddy is a bad, bad man, and he got thrown in jail. But it's okay, 'cause Screaming Eagle, the Indian chief who raised Tommy, said he'd be all our dads, too. I really like it here in this village. Our new brothers and sisters love to have fun and have been so nice to all of us.
Screaming Eagle : These white guys cannot dance!
Lil' Pete : Danny don't drink whiskey no more. And Ramon and Herm are trying to learn Indian ways. Oh, and big news. I finally have a girlfriend, and she's much prettier than a canty-loupe.
Tommy aka White Knife : [to Lil Pete & Beaver Breath] Come on you two, you're missing all the fun!
Lil' Pete : Anyways, Mama, thanks for raising me. Your loving son, Lil Pete, proud member of the Ridiculous 6.
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Tommy aka White Knife : [Playing baseball] Okay, that's two past ya. So you're done, right?
Abner DoubleDay : No, no, I said three times.
Short Stop : No, you said two.
Abner DoubleDay : I said three! Three strikes and I'm out. I know what I said, shortstop. That's your new name, Short Stop, that's right. Now and forever, forever and ever, Short Stop, Short Stop, Short Stop.
[laughs]
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[first lines]
Clem : Lookie here. My day is made. I didn't even finish breakfast and I get to kill me a stinkin' Injun.
Tommy aka White Knife : Injun? Nah. I just dress like this so's I don't get scalped out on the prairie.
Clem : Oh, well, that's a convincing outfit. Yeah, you can't be too safe out there... with all of them savages runnin' around. So, what can I do you for?
Tommy aka White Knife : Need some flour. Five sacks. And a carrot with peanut butter on it. Now, what's that gonna run me?
Clem : Well, sack of flour's 45 cents. So, five sacks... is 40...
Tommy aka White Knife : Wanna get back to me on that?
Clem : Yeah, look. Now, the flour's in the basement. You can fetch it yourself.
Tommy aka White Knife : Much obliged.
