Community (TV Series)
Economics of Marine Biology (2013)
Gillian Jacobs: Britta Perry
Photos
Quotes
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Annie Edison : Britta, where do we get drugs?
Britta Perry : Really?
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Britta Perry : This is a slippery slope.
Dean Pelton : Well, City College slipped that slope when they slipped him that scooter, but they sure slipped up when they let him set foot on our soil.
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Carl : We need this whale money. The kid likes snowboarding. Maybe Shaun White finds his way on the faculty roster. He likes to party. Maybe Greendale suddenly has a frat. The Delta Cubes, or whatever.
[Abed raises an eyebrow]
Britta Perry : Dean, you're not considering this, are you?
Dean Pelton : No, no. Greendale stands on its own. No hookers, no blow, no Shaun White frat.
Abed Nadir : College dean threatening a fraternity...
[Stands up dramatically]
Abed Nadir : You'll never shut down the Delta Cubes.
Dean Pelton : What?
Abed Nadir : [Leaves, chanting] Delta Cubes! Delta Cubes! Delta Cubes!
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Jeff Winger : Actually, you can count me in on this one.
Shirley Bennett , Dean Pelton , Annie Edison , Britta Perry , Abed Nadir , Troy Barnes : What?
Jeff Winger : You had me at "no Pierce."
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Dean Pelton : Age, 22, total years spent in high school, seven. Sat score zero. And he was recently arrested for selling marijuana to a police officer at a police station.
Britta Perry : So, you want us to help you recruit this idiot instead of an honors student or a science genius?
Jeff Winger : [sarcastically] Do we go to the same Greendale?
Dean Pelton : Ah, but let me reveal the fortune inside this cookie. Family net worth, $8 million. Ladies and gentlemen, this is what we in the community college recruiting game call a "whale." The perfect mix of low intellect, high lack of ambition, and limitless parental support.
Jeff Winger : So, a rich dumb-dumb who will never graduate and keep dropping money into the school indefinitely. Got it.
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Sassy Granny : [Britta and Troy are in bed watching a commercial on a Troy's laptop] Get your damn hand off of my Let's!
[Britta and Troy chuckle]
Troy Barnes : Honestly, after all that, you still eat Splingles?
Britta Perry : Uh, yeah, Troy. Splingles have 30% less fat. They're the fit chip.
Troy Barnes : You know, I kinda have a headache. Maybe you should go home.
[closes laptop]