- Travis Neal: [Title Card] Jeff had somehow gotten drunk off Dr. Pepper, and was super hyper and crazy the rest of the night.
- Dallin Earl: [Talking about the weight loss shake] It tastes delicious!
- Jeremy Glenn: Whoppers? But you hate whoppers.
- Dallin Earl: It doesn't taste like whoppers. Oh I know what it tastes like! It tastes like a chocolate jelly bean!
- Jenny Farrell: Ew!
- Jeremy Glenn: Ugh, that's disgusting! Why would you wanna eat a chocolate jelly bean?
- Dallin Earl: I don't know! Agh!
- Jenny Farrell: Dallin, I think those weight loss shakes make you a little crazy.
- Dallin Earl: It's not a weight loss shake, it's a weight shake, see? I'm growing!
- Dallin Earl: [Deciding on something romantic] The redwood forests.
- [Looks behind himself out the window]
- Dallin Earl: . Oh dang!
- Jeremy Glenn: I want to go to Paris. Wait, is that London? I don't know! I keep getting them confused, like is London Paris or-,
- Dallin Earl: Paris is Rome! Okay, let's go.
- Dallin Earl: [Reading off 'Sexy' card] Sed-ook-tive!
- Jeremy Glenn, Travis Neal: [Correcting] Seductive.
- Dallin Earl: What does seductive mean?
- Travis Neal: You don't wanna know.
- Dallin Earl: Dude, Mark Twain is freaking sexy!
- [to the window]
- Dallin Earl: MARK TWAIN IS SEXY!
- Jeremy Glenn: Good crap Dallin, the window's open!
- Dallin Earl: [Out the door] MARK TWAIN IS FREAKING...
- [to the camera]
- Dallin Earl: MARK TWAIN IS FREAKING-,
- Jenny Farrell: Be quiet!
- Dallin Earl: AROUSING!
- Jeremy Glenn: Dallin, will you shut up?
- Dallin Earl: MARK TWAIN AROUSES ME!
- Jenny Farrell: Jeremy, your card is... 'Masculine'.
- Dallin Earl: Ooh.
- Jeremy Glenn: Sweet. Let's do this thing.
- Dallin Earl: Okay. Male. Manly.
- Jeremy Glenn: You know it.