Brad Jones: Self

Quotes 

• [first lines] 

  Brad Jones : And there wasn't any soup in this one either.

  [looks over to David] 

  David Gobble : Fucking sucked.

  Brad Jones : What the fuck was that?

  David Gobble : That was fucking terrible!

  Brian Lewis : Don't listen to these guys. They're haters.

• Brad Jones : Who's this Superman guy? We only know of superhero Clark Kent.

  Brian Lewis : You know, Clark Kent, the alien!

• Brad Jones : Was the point of this scene to be like, "Hey! Well, ya know, 9/11 could have been worse! Superman could've been there!"?

  David Gobble : So, it wasn't that bad, New York. Get over it. That's what Brad's saying.

  Brad Jones : That's not what I said! That's not what I said, you son of a bitch! Stop saying, stop saying shit before the inevitable commenter probably would've said that!

• David Gobble : I'm gonna say this. I gotta get it out of my system. At the end of Batman Returns, I said, "Bullshit!," because Batman doesn't quit.

  Brad Jones : Oh, Dark Knight Rises?

  David Gobble : Dark Knight Rises, yeah. Bullshit, Batman doesn't quit. Superman... doesn't fucking kill people! He fucking doesn't do it! He's Superman; he doesn't fucking do it!

  Brian Lewis : He does now. Fucking does now.