BoJack Horseman (TV Series)

The Telescope (2014)

Stanley Tucci: Herb Kazzaz

Photos 

Quotes 

• BoJack Horseman : Hey, buddy.

  Herb Kazzaz : You come back for that vitamix, you...

  [coughs] 

  BoJack Horseman : Ooh, you should get that look at.

  Herb Kazzaz : Ha, yeah. I've been meaning to see a doctor.

  BoJack Horseman : Hey, I wanted to talk to you about... You know, I... feel bad, about what happened.

  Herb Kazzaz : So, you're apologizing.

  BoJack Horseman : Yeah, I'm sorry.

  Herb Kazzaz : Okay, I don't forgive you.

  BoJack Horseman : Herb, I said I'm sorry.

  Herb Kazzaz : Yeah, and I do not forgive you.

  BoJack Horseman : Uugh! Not sure you get what's happening here. This could be the last time...

  Herb Kazzaz : No, I'm not going to give you closure. You don't get that.

  [coughs] 

  Herb Kazzaz : You have to live the shitty thing, you did, for the rest of your life. You have to know that it's never ever going to be okay.

  BoJack Horseman : I really think that we'd both feel better if we...

  Herb Kazzaz : I'm dying. I'm not gonna feel better. And I'm not gonna be your prop so you can feel better.

  [coughs] 

  BoJack Horseman : You have to believe me, I did everything I could.

  Herb Kazzaz : Yeah, then why didn't you call me? Huh? Twenty years you didn't call me.

  BoJack Horseman : Look, I-I-I wanted to, but I didn't thin...

  Herb Kazzaz : You know what it was like for me? I had nobody, everybody left. I knew all those showbiz phonies would turn on me, sure, but you?

  BoJack Horseman : It's not my fault you got fired.

  Herb Kazzaz : I don't care about the job! I did fine, I had a good life. But what I needed then was a friend, and you abandoned me, and I will never forgive you for that. Now get the fuck out of my house!

  BoJack Horseman : I...

  [sighs] 

  BoJack Horseman : [walks out of Herb's room, pokes his head for a second] 

  BoJack Horseman : Yeah, this is a dumb question, but the gay thing and rectal cancer thing aren't related, are they?

  Herb Kazzaz : GET OUT OF HERE!

  BoJack Horseman : Never mind, stupid question. Forget I brought it up.

• Herb Kazzaz : [after a fight over a telescope]  You know what your problem is? You want to think of yourself as the good guy. Well, I know you better than anyone, and I can tell you that you're not. In fact, you'd probably sleep a lot better at night if you just admit to yourself that you're a selfish, goddamn coward who takes whatever he want, and doesn't give a shit about who he hurts! That's you! That's BoJack Horseman.

  BoJack Horseman : I don't why I came here.

  Herb Kazzaz : Yeah, you do.

• Herb Kazzaz : The show was never the same after I left, admit it!

  BoJack Horseman : Some people prefer the later years!