Humor Me (2017)

Jemaine Clement: Nate

Photos 

Quotes 

• Helen : You could use some confidence, Nate.

  Nate : You think so?

  Helen : Oh yes, I know about these things.

• Nate : So I'll check food and your health off the list of the things you're willing to actually discuss.

  [pause] 

  Nate : Dad, what happened to all of Mom's stuff from the old house? I mean, it's as if she never even existed.

  Bob : [exhales deep, fumbles to find words]  Maybe check that off your list as well.

• Allison : Once I serve my time with Dee, I'll go to Seattle or something and start over.

  Nate : Why Seattle?

  Allison : Um, can't get much further from New Jersey.

• Gabe : Daddy!

  Nate : Yes, Gabe?

  Gabe : You're not supposed to litter.

  [Gabe's car window rolls up] 

• Allison : My mom has this crazy idea that you're gonna come help them... with the play.

  Nate : Why is it so crazy? You're helping them.

  Allison : Yeah but, that's different.

  Nate : Why?

  Allison : Well, I don't have any other options.

  [Nate looks away realizing he doesn't either] 

• Allison : Which Nate wants to be friends, you or the potential you?

  Nate : Both.

  Allison : Sure, I'll read it

  [Nate's screenplay] 

  Allison : . I'm outnumbered.

• Nate : When you fall in love with someone, you're partially falling in love with the person they are at that moment, and partially with the person you hoped they would become. Maybe I let her down in that regard. She kind of gave up on the potential me.

• Bob : What did the doctor say?

  Nate : He said you've got to stop masturbating... so he can examine you.

  [Bob smiles] 

• Nate : Well, Nirit left me and she took Gabe. For a billionaire. A french one!

  Randy : Oh, man. Was it unexpected?

  Nate : Uh, no... we planned it a year in advance!