Mom (TV Series)

Pork Loin and a Beat-up Monte Carlo (2018)

Anna Faris: Christy Plunkett

Photos 

Quotes 

• Christy : [rehearsing her argument]  Am I moving my hands too much?

  Jill : I didn't hear a word you said, I was admiring how great you look in my suit.

  Adam : Christy, you're doing great. Angie Harmon moved her arms a lot on Law & Order.

  Jill : Is she still on that show?

  Adam : No, they canceled it, then she went to Rizzoli and Isles.

  Jill : That show hasn't been on for years either, should we be worried about her?

• Bonnie : [struggling with Tammy's Tylenol]  Now I'm just pushing the cotton further down, here Christy, you have the tiny monkey hands, can you get it?

  Christy : [groans]  My short past is an asset, my tiny hands are an asset, everything's just comin' up Christy.

• Christy : [during a mock trial]  Interesting hat, Glen.

  Glen : Thanks, I thought it'd make me look street.

  Christy : Let the record reflect that it does *not*.

• Christy : [in a mock trial, to the judge]  Your Honor, the defendant claims he's not a drug dealer, but he hides drugs like a drug dealer, he uses an old phone like a drug dealer, he rents several motel rooms to avoid search warrants, *like* a drug dealer.

  Beatrice : Where'd you get that? None of that was in the files.

  Christy : It was ALL in the files, your childhood was just too happy for you to notice it.

  Beatrice : What's that supposed to mean?

  Christy : It means I know how drug dealers work, yo. I was *raised* by a drug dealer, and I have my own dark years, I drank, I did drugs, I was a stripper... that doesn't have anything to do with this but it's out there. Didn't anyone ever wonder why I'm the oldest person in this class?

  Beatrice : I did.

  Glen : Me too.

  Professor Gannon : I wondered, but I'm not allowed to ask.

  Christy : It's because it's a *long* road to get here from the person I used to be. I know how drug dealers operate, and this man is *guilty*! Your Honor, the prosecution rests.

• Adam : Christy, you're gonna do great, that drug dealer is going down.

  Bonnie : Your trial's a drug case? What're the facts?

  Christy : Well, drugs were found in a locked car in his driveway, but it's not registered in his name.

  Bonnie : That's the oldest trick in the book! Remember when we lived in Oklahoma and I had that beat up old Monte Carlo registered in a dead person's name?

  Christy : So nothing could ever be tied back to you!

  Adam : I'm a little scared now.

  Jill : What's scary is they used to live in Oklahoma, I mean just move to Texas, it's *right* there.

• Christy : [prosecuting a mock trial]  Police found this cell phone in your possession. It's a 20 year old Nokia 6285. I'm curious why a cool guy like you would have such an old phone.

  Glen : Uh... I'm a retro kind of guy, yo?

  Christy : Or is it because a phone this old has no GPS, and therefore it would be impossible to track your movements?