Change Your Image
Craig JS
Reviews
On the Beach (2000)
Movie of the Week
Having resolved my self at an early age, to avoid nay to despise TV movies in all their shameless forms, I found my self at a bit of morale dilemma bringing my self to watch "On The Beach"; On the one hand a Modern take on a book I had read in my childhood. On the other Armand Assante. It was a difficult choice I can assure you.
Depressing and Dark, Convoluted and contrived simple yet strangely stirring. The telling of what is to happen after the bomb has been dropped from the Australian point of view is simple. The wind has been slowly but surely sending death down under. There is little to but wait and plan for the inevitable. An American nuclear vessel travels in out of the deep blue and provides a glimmer of hope to the survival of the human race.
The Book was strangely profound in its telling, or at least it was to a boy in his early teens when I first read it. Too many "but why's" ruined this film for me in the present. Its story though updated for the millennium still provided me with one to many questions un-answered. Perhaps I require more holes to be filled in at the end of the day. Having put these issues aside in my mind, I resolved to look at the good points; Bryan Brown is a good point, as is Rachel Ward. The Acting all round was for the most part superb. As was the some what tear jerking finale that provides nuclear war a very human face. I must say given these statements I might have started the destruction of the universe as we know it, A TV movie good? Surely not. Well provided the productions values were good for a movie made on TV budget, splendid acting and an great couple of closing moments. It's severely hampered by a dish water weak love story, unanswered questions a plenty and perhaps the worst American accent ever recorded
Beyond these quibbles, This some what easy to hate but still strangely stirring movie is not bad. Its not particularly good, but I have been biased though years of poor TV movies. I would perhaps advise those of you who liked the drama of say Die Hard, to look else where for your entertainment. However if you are not terribly afraid of a little tear jerker and a downer ending, enjoy!
The Sex Monster (1999)
Be careful what you wish for, you may get exactly that
Do not be misled by the title into thinking this is the latest in a long and star-studded line of the Playboy movie of week fare. This is actually an amusing if someone self-fulfilling and happy meal packaged film. Its focus is on a Husband (Mike Binder) and his subservient and submissive wife (Mariel Hemmingway) who is finally convinced her to give in to her natural female instincts and allow another woman into the marital bed. What starts off down the trail of many a male's fantasy quickly goes astray when it is apparent that he is no longer needed in the bedroom.
Mikes downward spiral is amusing as he goes from shear disbelief that he is living the playboy ideal to pleading with his wife to refrain from sleeping with his baby sister. The movie was written and directed by Mike Binder who acquits him self nicely as he takes on the role of protagonist and victim during the some 94 minutes running time. Though never fully rising above the straight to video look, the film does not bore or detract from the comedy of a now fully functioning sex monster wife, who is out to sleep with just about every woman she comes across. Mariel Hemmingway is rather amusing and begs the question, where in her career did she go wrong? She is both pretty and entertaining, qualities it would seem, should have destined her for Julia Roberts heights. Alack alas the movie gods are cruel by nature it would seem. Stephen Baldwin makes a fleeting appearance as a business partner whose wife appears to have been locked in a tower for most of her adult life.
Those looking to find something to pass time, have a laugh and have the message "be careful for what you wish, you may just get it" beaten into you, can rest assured you will find what you are looking for here. However for those of you, who may have seen the title and thought that it would be an excellent way to get your rocks of, I suggest you go find one of those Playboy movies of week I discussed earlier.
Captain America (1990)
Does he do childrens parties though.
In what has to be the greatest anti-communist comic hero of all time, Captain American made his most recent transition to film in this instantly forgettable 1992 straight to video release. Not since the early 70's (the proverbial golden age of really bad movies) has there been a film that delves to the bottom of the barrel in an effort to scrape out what is left quite like this film does.
Captain America seems like it was doomed to fail long before the opening credits ran. The feature was plagued with Legal Red Tape when parent studio 21st Century films went under shortly after this film was in the can. It was shelved for 2 years before finally being released to video. If your wondering, yes they are same group who are also mostly responsible for the legal fiasco that helped hold up work on the much touted never seen James Cameron Spiderman project. With far too much of Old Cap's (Matt Salinger) time spent walking around bewildered in this part action, part fish out of water tale. Matt Salinger turns in an Ernest and honest performance given the nature of the roll there really isn't any room for him to flex his acting muscles. Ronny Cox (Robocop, Total Recall) plays the President, that needs rescuing, but given the high cheddar content of his lines and the patriotic condescending monologues that he is forced to run with I say, let the terrorists keep him he's no good to us. Ronny obviously had car repayments due when he signed on the dotted line for this little piece of cinema slop. Scott Pauline phones in his performance for the make up heavy Red Skull and just spouts of cliché after cliché. The only thing that kept me from turning it off and setting fire to the tape (in an effort to protect the delicate minds of my nations youth) was the occasional action sequence which weren't bad, and as a result kick started pace wee bit. It's just a real shame there weren't more of them. Despite a promising intro the action pieces it fails to regain the momentum, despite director Albert Pyuns (Cyborg) best intentions (and there must have been a few) the film falls flat on its face, scene after agonizing scene. I suspect with some half decent management on this title, a modest and reasonable Captain America film could have been produced. Nothing like some cheap hack and slash film making to make a couple of bucks when you're in receivership I guess.
You can Consider yourself duly warned so rent/buy (if someone hasn't stolen it for use in satanic ritual as this is pretty much all its good for) and watch at your own peril. Only seasoned die-hard Captain America fans will truly appreciate it, if only for the occasional moment when he is doing superhero like stuff. The rest of the time they too will be reaching for the straight razor to put an end to the madness.
The Batman Superman Movie: World's Finest (1997)
Saturday morning fun
Down and out on a Friday night, I took refuge at a friend of mines house. Before long Brittany on MTV grew dull and we popped on the Batman/Superman Animated movie. At first a little edgy, thinking haven't they dragged them both though the mud enough, where does the marketing end. But With in seconds of the opening credits, I was glued to the screen, transfixed at what I was seeing there. A very classy, if somewhat gaudy representation of the two characters I grew up with. Batman and Superman, at first not willing to work together to stop The Murderous Joker and Side Kick Harleyquin on a vendetta to kill Superman, love those plot devices, but latter using their own unique style of vigilante justice in unison to bring the evildoers in. I really should write comics.
Animation wise it's a step above the usual Saturday morning cartoons of the respective heroes however its still at least a flight bellow your usual Disney feature film. I guess when you are paying the lowest bidding animation studio to slap this stuff together you cant be too picky. Produced by long time Batman writer Paul Dini. The man who is 90% responsible for bring the fantastic Batman animated series to us over the last 4 years, he really went and out did him self here. The dialogue is both witty and fresh with out being overly corny. Written with just enough innuendo and savvy to keep the older viewers smirking. When Bruce Wayne (Batman's alter ego) is seen to be making moves on Superman's main squeeze Lois, Clark remarks, `Of course you have been dividing your time between work and Lois.' Bruce replies with genuine arrogant charm `Is that a problem?' With Deadpan seriousness Clark retorts, `Let's just say I'm concerned. Your reputation is... dubious. In and out of costume.' I dare you to find better dialogue any where on Saturday morning television. The film flows with some modest attempts to flesh out the human sides of the characters but by this point in the evening we are too busy wondering how Lex Luthor's driver/body guard is to be taken seriously in that skirt. This straight to video release is basically the 3-episode arc that marks the pilot from the TV series of the same name. Compared to the last two big screen efforts, this really sets the standard for Batman films, Joel Schumacher should be forced to watch, pen and paper in hand and take notes, gaudy okay nipples bad.
Besides some enjoyable action sequences the fun comes in picking the actors who voice the main characters. Mark Hamil, yes Luke Skywalker himself, pulls of a Nicholson-esque joker while Timothy Daly of `Wings' fame does the Man of Steel. What's the bet that Tim uses that fact in pickup lines in bars? Kevin Conroy does Batman. That man must eat cigarettes for breakfast. On whole very enjoyable and fans should watch to see the Man of Steel and the Dark Knight actually done semi well. Though you might get some funny looks from the Video store clerk when you bring this to the counter. Tell him its for your nephew.
Cannonball! (1976)
New meaning to the term "Put your brain in Neutral"
Cannonball.
The movie that broke the dam and started a flood of films revolving around illegal coast to coast car races, really isn't half bad. That is so long as you don't forget its a B grade film. There are moments during it's one and half hours of engine revving running time that you are could be duped into thinking that the film makers had something higher purpose in mind they fleshed out the script on an empty pizza box to this masterpiece. The opening scene (a dream scene no less) just oozes style and stinks and I mean that in a (it reeks like gym socks kind of a way) of finesse. It comes complete with a cryptic voice over and a heart beat soundtrack...enthralling.
David Carradine plays the titular Cannonball. He's the strong silent type with a dodgy past, he's out to win the Trans American to get his life back on track, after spending some time in the slammer for a crime he didn't commit. In what 70's film didn't he play this guy? There's your token bad guy complete with a black Dodge Charger that is looking to do him (being titular Cannonball) in at any cost. Why? Because you can't have a movie like this with out a bad guy. Its like sex with out the wet patch, they come hand in hand.
Made in that 70's dirty "we couldn't afford to buy better film" style that is normally reserved for Porn films and early sword and sorcery flicks the film makers have covered off all the stereotypes that we have come to know and love from these kinds of movies. We have a European with an exotic car, a couple of girls in a car going fast and wearing little, a ethnic minority character with little luck when it comes to cars or women. The a fore mentioned brooding anti-hero good guy type, the maniacal bad guy and a host of token others that matter little to the grand scheme of things, oh and of course more than its fair share of stupid cops.
The real stars of this movie however are the cars, let's be honest it's the only reason this movie was made. A showcase of some of the most popular American and a token European muscle car, ever to make their way on to the road. Let us review; Dodge Charger, Trans Am's (must be popular because there are two of them), a Corvette, Mustangs and all the hotted up customs you could ever want. They are all thrown though their paces but though the budget prevented any real fancy camera work really show off their moves. However there is some really decent action sequences here, that exceed the movie's standing as an the aforementioned 'we couldn't afford to buy better film' and make it memorable even by today's blockbuster standards. The highlights to look for, the massive car pile up on the interstate towards the end and the trashing of the Detomaso Pantera. So as you can imagine there's enough car carnage to make even the most Blues Brother hardened fan giddy with excitement.
To sum up, Cannonball is a bit of Tuesday night fun and to be enjoyed at its best, watched with a few friends and some strong liquor. Don't for get to look for Martin Scorsese and Sylvester Stallone in early cameo roles.
RoboCop 2 (1990)
Chrome and wise cracks
Perhaps I was biased, perhaps I didn't require much from my movies to make them good or maybe Robocop 2 wasn't that bad. Paul Verhoeven's Robocop was more a foray into social satire and definitely superior to its sequels. It mimicked the society in which we live or did rather in 1987 and portrayed a robot that was more human than the automaton characters that surrounded him. Robocop 2 doesn't have time for social satire, he's too busy bustin butt and blown stuff up.
Frank Miller better known for his much acclaimed comic books, (which could explain the comic book feel of the film) wrote and Irvin Kershner (Never say never and Empire Strikes Back) directed this inevitable sequel, that should have been called Robocop 2 "Back to Cash In!" It's basically a rehash of the first with less heart and none of the subtle style and undertone. So as you can imagine Robocop busts bad guys with sufficient style and finesse, he gets beat up only to come back in a climactic showdown, and saves the day in what has to be one of the best fight scene's in recent cinema history. It almost saves this film.
Sure its nothing but a blatant attempt to part you from your bottom dollar but if you allow it, it will entertain you enough not to care. It brings home the bacon as an action film with a high body count and some big explosions. Peter Weller does Robocop really well (like Arnie does The Terminator really well). However Tom Noonan who portrays the role of Cain, the drug lord and all around evil master mind really lets the bad guys down, something about a villain that looks like a hippie that tends not to scare me. It's really doesn't offer you anything new as film, but it has some good laughs and it is kinda cool to see Robocop stopping crime in a way that only Robocop can. All in all worth a look on video if you haven't already seen it. Or if you are just in the mood to see lots of things get blown up by a walking fridge.
The Doctor (1991)
Medical Drama on a good day
The doctor is a quiet slow paced movie but in the same way's a slow dance good, so is The Doctor. Jack (William Hurt) is a heart surgeon who is brilliant at his craft however his bedside matter would freeze hell over. He is forced to walk a mile in his patients shoes when he finds himself in need of treatment for throat cancer. He sees for the first time his medical system from the end users point of view and the view is not that great. The story is fairly simple and it is the fine acting that floats it. You know what's going to happen in the plot, you are fairly entertained at first finding it hard to sympathize with Jack. In fact its gratifying to the audience to see him pushed and treated like a number, just like we all have. As you see Jack dehumanized by a mechanical system that does not care however it hits you fairly close to home (who hasn't spent an hour waiting to get stitched up at the hospital) and you start to sympathize with Jack. At that point the film hits the mark it was aiming for the filmmakers say thank you, pack up and go home. Randa directs the film, by the numbers trading fancy camera work and flash editing for story and pace. She does what she needs to do to tell the story and nothing more nothing less. The Doctor co-stars Elizabeth Perkins who plays a tool character, a fellow patient who is jacks conscience personified. She shows him the errors of his ways with her words of wisdom and Christine Lahti as his distant but not unloving wife. Who ultimately plays jacks redemption. The Doctor is a nice heartwarming, time passing movie overall so I recommend to all you guys out there looking to get some sensitivity into your lives and you have seen all of Cameron Crowe's movie's. And Ladies I have no doubt that this should be gotten out at the same time as Beaches and watched with tissue and Ice Cream close at hand. Keep your eyes peeled all you Chicago Hope fans, The Doctor is packed full of people who just couldn't shake that doctor stereotype and went on to play doctors again in Chicago hope. On a final note, just like most movies that tug at your heart strings, your brain isn't required, so leave it at the video store.
The Adventures of Ford Fairlane (1990)
Perhaps it was ahead of its time.
The Adventures of Ford Fairlane is one of those movies that should have been a BIG HIT and what I want to know is where did it go wrong? I not only enjoyed this movie but I find myself watching it every couple of months. However it just doesn't sit right. Its like a fast food meal. It looks good, it smells good heck it even tastes good. You you know that it wasn't.
Andrew Dice Clay plays the over the top character Ford Fairlane, a music industry private detective that uses his various connections to get him into 'the hottest clubs, the hottest gigs' and wait for it 'the hottest chicks'. Yes the cliché' start early here. A member of the hottest rock group around winds up dead from a supposed drug overdose but convoluted plots are foot that bring a sinister plot to light. Will Ford save the day and make the world safe for Rock and Roll once more?
With a cast of recognizable actors including Pricilla Presley, Lauren Holly, Wayne Newton, Ed O'Neill and Robert Englund (playing a Psychopath, no type casting here), supporting him. Somehow despite a colorful line up and tonnes of great talent it still falls short.
This film has all the elements for a good movie. Good cast, reasonable premise and the potential for a memorable soundtrack. However for Andrew Clay doing 'I ain't got you' as what has to be the movies musical highlight. Entertaining as I do find it it never really gels. As a result it fails to escape slightly amusing passing of time to memorable classic.
Batman (1989)
Something about a man in Rubber....
Batman was one of those movies that as a kid I watched and went `that was so cool'. Nearly 10 years on it still delivers. Tim Burton's Batman is a slick stylish movie that makes what could be argued as the best Comic (Superman, The Crow and Blade are contenders to that crown) to Film translation ever. Focussing on the dark and gritty themes framed beautifully by Tim Burton's eye for dark on lights. Michael Keaton who despite almost public outrage when picked to play Batman turns in what has been the best Batman portrayal from 3 other actors to try the cowl and cape. Jack Nicholson as the Joker is evil and malevolent if not perhaps a tad over the top and Kim Bassinger doing Vicky Vale, a tool character, who is constantly in trouble and screams/squeals at every given opportunity. The movie is intelligent and forthright with its development, it progresses nicely with good pace and timing that is well suited to the feel of the film. The movie doesn't play down to us too much and keeps it relatively simple to follow so it doesn't lose the younger viewers. Whilst keeping it gritty and the content adult oriented enough to keep the older members of the audience interested. The sequels did not seem to keep to this mindset; they appeared to want the younger audience more. I guess because you can sell more action figures to them. The Action sequences unfold in a comic book fashion with typically big hits, but in clever development our hero doesn't trundle though the villains like a freight train. Sure he kicks ass but we are made to see that he is only human and he bleeds like the rest of the characters. This is what makes Batman quite special, he is only a man. The film feels a bit constricted because it is shot mostly on specially constructed stages so you end up seeing the same locations again and again, from different angles but you are usually having too much fun to notice or care. Batman is all good basically, and is definitely worth a look on video or adding it to that increasing video library.
Batman & Robin (1997)
What amazes me is that it made money
Where did they go wrong? Has Akiva Goldsmith or Joel Schumacher read a Batman comic, ever? What were they thinking? Moreover when they were blowing their 110 odd million dollars, someone reading the script must have gone `Hey we can't make this movie, its gonna suck!' This film the 4th Batman installment lacks redeeming features there was nothing good about it. Unlike Batman Forever which at least was mildly amusing if not mindless. The opening sequence looked much like the original series from the 60's, complete with cape twirling and highly choreographed fight scenes, reminding you of something from Disney on ICE. Our bad guys are far less than frightening, Far less than evil, hell there far less than everything and reside somewhere around annoying. George Clooney looks the part of Batman (all the actors to do Batman have been good mind you) but there is so little for him to do with the character in the script. George is reduced glowering looks and posing. In what seems like a popular motive in Hollywood at the moment, if the plots thin thicken up the cast. There are more big names in this film than on a night at the Oscars, Suddenly you think, `so thats what they spent their money on.' The rest of the cast does the best they can with what there was of a script, but they are trying their best and it shows. Batman is reduced to a whinny credit card toting yuppie. Who after a few moments of using the Bat blades or the Bat laser you begin to wonder if he uses Bat Toilet paper and has Bat slippers sitting beside the Bat Bed? As there is with many comic characters, there are good things and then there are bad things to emphasize. In Batman, the whole Dark Knight and Detective thing are great things to focus on. Not the patented Bat Accessories referred to in every second scene because what hardened criminal is going to take a vigilante seriously who stops to use a Bat rope, with a Bat hook on the other end. Batman and Robin fails as a movie because I think it was nothing more than a commercial for the marketing tie ins. Recommendations for the next film you may ask? I have one, don't let Joel Schumacher or Akiva Goldsmith anywhere near it.
Small Soldiers (1998)
Good things come in small packages
Small Soldiers was a movie I had much anticipated. As a kid I used to imagine my GI Joe's coming to life, running missions and fighting mock battles in my room under the cover of darkness. So as you could imagine this a movie that seemed to want to take me back to those hey days of my youth. Problem being that, I think I would have enjoyed this movie more were I a youth. Let us make no mistakes this film is essentially a rehash of Gremlins. Toys of artificial intelligence replace the Gremlins in this film and the cast is younger than that of Gremlins Zach Galligan and Phoebe Cates. The film's special effects are great and the toys that come to life though the marvel of modern military technology and more than a little help by the wizards down at ILM interact seamlessly with the live actors. Kind of like a real world version of Toy Story. This is the sort of movie though that could work really really well if just could decided on a genre, Kids film or horror/comedy/action, kind of like stuff Joe Dante normally turns out. As it stands it is an uneasy mix of the two. One moment its beating you senseless with fluff the next its being quite cutting and on the money with its humor and violence. It was almost as if the studios were frightened no one would come to see it so had better secure the kiddy dollar whilst trying to retain some respectability with the adults. The live actors are senseless and irrational in contrast to the methodical logical thinking that seems to go on in the toy's heads. Unfortunately there is not much room for characters to develop especially with some of the toys. But when your principal audience is too busy worrying about how they are going to part their parents from their money to purchase the marketing tie ins. You really don't need to worry about a characters trails and tribulations. There are enough jokes in here aimed at the Adults and the spoofs of classic war movies (Patton and Apocalypse Now) to keep you interested enough. Also trying to pick the celebrity voices behind the toys is lot of fun, but unless you're willing to let the film pamper you a bit you aren't going to like it. At the end of the film you are left felling a little let down, because there isn't enough substance. I think though what really annoyed me about this film was that I was too old to enjoy it to its full potential and were I a 12 year old I would have enjoyed it more. On final note what is it with Dante and short little destructive things? Next year maybe should get him started on a Smurfs feature.
Doctor Dolittle (1998)
Tiger Doo, is not Little.
I never really did like Dr Dolittle much as a kid as I preferred films that didn't break out into song every 10 minutes, like Star Wars. There was no singing in Star Wars. So it will come as no surprise that I wasn't really anticipating this film and was prepared to be bored to tears with a G-rated Eddie Murphy singing to kids. Imagine my surprise to find some witty dialog coming right out of the horse's mouth so to speak. Ahem.
Eddie Murphy plays Dr Dolittle a family man who seems a little wrapped in his work as a Doctor. So busy in fact that hasn't the time to stop and listen to the animals that all of a sudden decided that they would like to talk to him. Despite years of being silent. With in days Dolittle ditches the profitable people with Medical insurance in favor of pigeons and guinea pigs. His now talkative four legged and winged companions teach him how to be a better man, husband and father. Naturally a change of lifestyle and a better relationship with his family follows. All we need now is sort of dilemma and action in the 3rd act to seal the deal. Oh wait there it is save one Tiger from certain death. That was close nearly missed it in the moral preaching that saturates this film.
The Animals are a host of well knowns that steal scene after scene with impersonations and one liners. Apparently animals make up for their lack of civility lack of technology opposable thumbs with a good sense of humor. Chris Rock as the hamster (also G-Rated) is completely wasted here however had my neighbors hamster made this much noise. It wouldn't have been set upon by the vacuum cleaner.
The film is aimed at the children but there is enough here to keep the adults amused. Dr Dolittle has more that its share of slap stick and the toilet humor that cannot be avoided. Despite this its probably with the price of a rental.
The Mask of Zorro (1998)
With all the whips in this, when does the leather come out?
All one requires to enjoy The Mask of Zorro is that have at one point in their life been a child, swash buckling with imaginary bad guys with a wooden sword. Or in my case, to my mother's horror the 9-inch carving knife out of the kitchen drawer. It is a by the numbers action/comedy/adventure movie that has all the visual sight gags (complete with classic jumping on to a horse that moves at the last moment) one liners, action, plunging necklines (provided by Catherine Zeta Jones), evil nasty bad guys and romance to keep everyone happy. Antonio Banderas's (Zorro) performance is charming and witty, as a thief turned hero at the hands of an aging Zorro (Anthony Hopkins who turns in a trade mark value performance) who is looking for revenge and his long lost daughter. It is nicely shot with fairly interesting sets and scenery with some very impressive sword duels, the kind that would have done Errol Flynn proud. It doesn't dwell for two long on the `How's' and `Whys' of the plot and for good reason, in places its REAL thin. The writer's just expect us to accept various things, like the training of the new Zorro (Banderas) for example; appears to happen over night. What ever happen to years of practice? This being the case, sign me up for my Black Cape and sword, I could be out fighting power mad Latin American Dictators by the end of the week. These things aside, we do enjoy the movie. It has achieved what a lot of action films of late haven't managed, simplicity. You don't need a hugely elaborate plot involving twins, aliens and big special FX scenes. All you need are some well meaning Mexican peasants in a death trap. For me personally this was a very refreshing movie, it didn't bore me with needless complications whilst not insulting me by treating me like an idiot. All in all I felt it was money well spent and recommend it all Zorro fans new and old alike it is highly enjoyable and proof that comic style heroes can make the translation to the big screen successfully. Perhaps the makers of the last Batman movie should see this and take some notes.
RoboCop (1987)
Crime, corruption and Chrome!
Robocop's vision of the future is somewhat dark and gritty but proves to be a most enjoyable tale of Alex Murphy (Peter Weller), the good cop who gets killed in the line of duty. Only to be reborn as a high tech tool of justice. This is the first of what have become the more memorable Paul Verhoeven films and definitely the best of the Robocop series. His almost trade mark use of blood and excessive violence is evident here and often leaves you wincing in sympathetic pain for the characters on screen, you honestly start felling sorry for some of them. The movie works well on a number of levels and proves to be a highly entertaining action film with just a hint of something higher at work. As an action film it is highly successful, it provides witty one liners and makes for excellent bang for your buck. But as a social satire it also functions, it makes a healthy stab at the values we are adopting in out lives. As Science Fiction it is one of the more enjoyable outings of the late eighties. It is interesting to note the characters in this a clever little film. Most of the human characters seem shallow, yet logically the most shallow character (Robocop) seems to be the only human element in the film. The movie follows a pretty predictable story line, boy makes good, boy goes out for revenge, boy is framed, boy comes back as a hero despite all odds. Despite the lack of a surprising story, it is still is a highly entertaining film, providing as many gasps as laughs and leaves you at the end of it thinking `Hell I wanna be a Robot!' It is however interesting to note that yes old Robo is cased in Titanium, practically invincible to the oncoming onslaught of bullets and other things nasty that no one thinks to shoot him in the mouth. Its not like he's moving too fast for them to do this. I wonder perhaps if he also has Titanium teeth.
Armageddon (1998)
American Flag waving at its best
In a Strange and silly way Armageddon works. I sat though the whole movie thinking you cant do this, or it doesn't happen like that, or that wouldn't work, but you know what? I was having so much fun I didn't care. Sure it was kinda cheesy, and the laws of physics only applied when the plot called for them, much like for example, how the coyote from RoadRunner fame only fell when he looked down. It is important to note that the filmmakers don't take themselves to seriously and made the film quite light hearted and laugh out loud funny in places. Maybe it was meant to distract us from the plot flaws. Michael Bay is proving to be quite adept at making action films. His trademark break neck pace is slightly annoying here as the movie goes to long and the pace has sufficiently tired us towards the end. However he has tried for a smite more sentiment in this film than in his previous outings and maybe he is looking to branch out from the action film business into perhaps Period Drama's. I think his camera work would go over well in a heated argument scene between two lovers (a lady of the manor and a stable boy), I can even seen that slap being filmed in slow motion with some nice lighting effects with a rock track back it up. As I said before an enjoyable movie that if you haven't seen, I recommend you do , even if it is only For Steve Buscemi's scene stealing, movie making one liners. The one thing I must bring up before I end this rant, is why would you install a forward facing Gattling Gun? Maybe the minds that developed the Space Rover thing, anticipated finding some aliens that were hostile on this Meteor. Much like for example the Bugs from Starship Troopers. Or maybe you can't make a blockbuster movies these days with out little bit of gunplay.
Starship Troopers (1997)
Guns, Guts, Gals......what more could a guy ask for?
Paul Verhoeven has decided that movies about societies scantily clad (Showgirls) are not his forte. And rightly so has gone back to excessively violent SCI-FI/action films. After watching showgirls 5 to 26 times its refreshing (ahem).
Starship Trooper's concept, alien bugs that hurl meteors at us is so far beyond reasonable thought to try for realism. So Thankfully it doesn't even bother. Visual sight gags and dish water weak plot keep pace nicely with the excessive violence creating a nice comic book feel. It almost allows us to be fooled into thinking that we are watching art. All this being said it takes a predictable Hollywood approach and focuses on the fun that can be had with special effects, heaving bosoms and the loading politically correct bad guys with as much lead as they like with out the possibility of getting some random minority rights group ticked.
Its an enjoyable film (if you are a guy) and definitely worth a look on DVD if you some how managed to miss it until now.