basit Reviews

Chicken Little (2005)

Disgusting

[1/10 · 5 November 2005]

It's not possible that this came out the same studios that produced The Incredibles just last year.

Forget the turgid animation (sans Pixar - entirely understandable). The story is demented and unengaging from the start. The humor is annoyingly out of step. The emotional sub-plots are tired and seem to be wheeled out as cliff notes. The music is uninspiring. The characters are dis-likable to a tee. The pacing is too slow, too fast. The embedded movie references just come off as crass rather than amusing. It's a horrible mess.

Yes, your under 7s might enjoy it. But if you have a care for making the world a better place in any fashion, donate the price of your ticket purchase to some worthy cause and let the kids watch any Disney/Pixar DVD instead. We the buying public must question why we should allow this type of sub standard nonsense to pass for entertainment anymore and why we should let our children be exposed to anything less than imaginative, original story lines and quality film making.

Disney, you should be disgusted with yourselves!

Hulk (2003)

Awesome & misunderstood movie... much like it's main character

[9/10 · 21 June 2003]

Yeah, it's long on emotional drama. So what? Maybe you prefer the fantastic emptiness of the later Batman flicks. Yeah the CGI looks suspect in a couple of places, but it's never bad enough to make you have to fully suspend your disbelief in order to just continue watching the movie. It's more plausible that we have all just become special effects snobs in todays world of ever escalating new effects wizadry.

Hulk is imaginitive, thoughtful, beautiful, entertaining and stylish. Not sure what the detractors were quite expecting, but I can't see that any other approach than the one Ang Lee and his crew took would have worked as well. Beats Spiderman. Nearly on par with X2, but for different reasons.

Worth the money.

Things to Do in Denver When You're Dead (1995)

Pretty cool

[9/10 · 17 December 2000]

Don't try and compare this movie, especially to anything 'Tarantino-esque'. It should be viewed and judged on its own merit, and as such, I think, is a pretty cool effort.

Now, it helps if you like Andy Garcia, and if you do, you'll find a lot to enjoy about this movie. Christopher Walken has a role that is almost a clone of his character in Suicide Kings, and as usual is menacingly great. All the actors turn in fine performances, and the story has a fair sprinkling of unusual twists and believable characters to keep the viewer throughly engaged throughout.

It kinda lays on the 'choose-life' antics a little thick in places, but the audience is always warmed into it, rather than preached at I feel.

Go rent it and keep an open mind.

Book of Shadows: Blair Witch 2 (2000)

DO NOT PREJUDGE THIS MOVIE

[8/10 · 9 November 2000]

Does anyone remember Angel Heart? Alan Parker directed Mickey Rourke and Robert DeNiro in this underrated schlock-horror from the eighties, revolving around missing time, good vs evil and unnatural events. Great flick, and while BW2 isn't nearly as great, it certainly tries.

Unfortunately, expectation seems to have deflated any chance this movie had of being judged on it's own merit.

The director Berlinger said prior to release that his biggest concern was this flick would be seen as a jump-out-of-your-seat horror movie, and it's not really at all. It's a psychological thriller with supernatural overtones. Which, when you think about it is what the first movie was too, but as has been said by many, in a very different way.

The story is fine, the acting, yes somewhat Aaron Spelling, but engaging nevertheless. In all, it's a pretty smart effort. Don't expect any in-your-face twists in the tail, there's more thought required than that, but even then the progressive character breakdown and revelation and blurring of truth/untruth make for a smart enough ending.

Give love a chance.

Gladiator (2000)

Superb sumptuous sweeping epic

[10/10 · 14 May 2000]

I think this might just be Ridley Scott's best yet.

The story is good, not great, but it's just so well told and in such bold charismatic tones, that you can't help but admire it. Lots of political intrigue, a fair sprinkling of human dignity, much savagery and of course Scott's familiar brooding cinematography.

Crowe has just got this swagger about him, that you would for kill for. All the actors are intoxicating to watch.

Yeah, sure, it's a little cheesy and drawn out in places, but still easily the best movie of the year.

Go see.

American Psycho (2000)

Edgy, black and fascinating.

[10/10 · 19 April 2000]

Christian Bale is fantastic. Totally whacked out man. His portrayal of a man so immersed in materialism that nothing moves him (including murders and executions) anymore is enthralling.

The story is a little patchy in places, but overall, this is great flick. Highly recommended.

The Messenger: The Story of Joan of Arc (1999)

Solid effort

[9/10 · 8 April 2000]

In typical Luc Besson style, the visuals are sumptuous, the story fluid, the poitics engaging and the acting, if nothing else, quirky.

Not being able to tell how much of this account of the story of Joan of Arc is fact and how much is fiction, I still found the characters to be watchable and believable.

This is a solid effort at historical story telling. The only other thing I would say is that Milla Jovovich makes an excellent effort at sustaining the intensity and god-concsiousness within her character that one would have expected, but does come over as a little lost sometimes (maybe intentionally so, when you consider that Joan of Arc was only 19 when she died anyway)

Worth seeing.

Erin Brockovich (2000)

Actually pretty dull movie

[7 April 2000]

Don't be deceived. I really don't believe there is all that much to like about this flick. If you empathize with in-your-face abrasive characters with mega chips on their shoulders, then Julia Roberts' character is going to come over as 'ballsy' and 'brassy' to you.

If you find that kind of attitude just too 80's to be at all endearing anymore, then her character is just going to come over as plain rude, hostile and largely detached from anyone else's feelings except other people who've had a hard hard time.

Whilst the story may be true, it was profoundly dull, played out with little sense of suspense or tension building, and quite frankly is better suited to a 1 hour documentary than a 2 and a half hour snore of a cinematic effort.

I'll Do Anything (1994)

Enjoyable in a surprising way

[7/10 · 12 March 2000]

Just caught this flick on Cable by accident. lazy Sunday afternoon, and Contact was playing on TNT for the 50th 'premiere' time, so I figured, what the heck.

And actually, it's kinda interesting I thought. Nick Nolte and kids are always terminally cute for some reason (ref. Three Fugitives with Martin Short). He's like like a big St. Bernard dog.

Anyway, the story is OK, losta phony LA movie folks earnestly searching for themselves, blah, blah, blah. Somewhere in there, there is some genuine humor and heartfelt sentiment. Actually not all that mushy. Tracey Ullman is horrible as always, but apart from that an OK Sunday afternoon flick.

Pitch Black (2000)

Deep Blue Sea Meets Lost in Space

[6/10 · 5 March 2000]

To cut a long story short, this is an OK rental flick, not, in my opinion worth seeing at the movies.

Seriously if you loved deep blue sea, you'll probably go for this one too. Whilst some of the direction and plot had originality to it, and the characters were mostly watchable (Vin Diesel notably), I was disappointed that the story which starts out so promisingly in terms of its sense of danger and eerieeness, decays so easily into yer average monster shoot-em-up flick.

SEMI-SPOLIERS - It would have been great if the monsters were much more insiduous, intelligent and scheming as a collective in their dealings with the poor trapped humans. That is most significantly why the Alien flicks are truly terrifying and this is just average.

It would have been really entertaining if the pitch black of the title led to some greater unseen evil-from-within kinda of thing, but as it is once you've seen the monsters, that's all there is to it.

5/10

Magnolia (1999)

Astonishing movie.

[10/10 · 14 February 2000]

Yes, this movie is way long. Yes, it's contrived. yes it lulls in places. Yes it's about a bunch of boring people and their boring problems.

Welcome to life.

I'll tell you why this movie is astonishing. Most movies build a sense of suspense and confusion somewhere about the second third of the movie and present their vacuous denoument therefater, leaving you pacified and happy that someone else did the thinking for you for the last 2 hours.

This movie generates a looming sense of tension from the first 5 minutes and just keeps building until you get to the 'emotional' low point characteristic of this director's style. SPOILER - There's no happy ending, no sugar to help the medicine go down.

So what's it all about. Well there are all these people, with seemingly disparate lives, histories, aspirations and problems. At the very core it's about adults and children and the way in which oppression always comes back to haunt the oppressors.

Now, this isn't the first movie about messed up people and their messed up lives that's been made. Certainly won't be the last. I remember a little entry in last year's offerings called American Beauty which looked and felt much like this. Not being a resident of the US, I found American Beauty uninspiring and really just an inside (if dark) anecdote about suburban American life, that Americans would find amusing amongst themselves.

Magnolia, I believe has pretensions of, and largely succeeds at presenting, a much more cosmic view of life, order, disorder and the universe.

So what do you leave with for your $7? At the very least you leave with the knowledge that you have just seen the best performances and the most visually enthralling cinematography that $7 can buy. What else? What else then depends on what you came seeking in the first place.

Be warned you will be required to think throughout and after this movie. You will be required to ask, 'what does it all mean?'. You are suppose to come away realizing that there's something larger at work in all our lives. Sounds like a bunch of hooey? Well maybe you're right, but try this. Remember that this a story about how adults treat children and vice versa. Some of us may hope to become adults some day, but we sure as heck have all been in that place called childhood at some time or another.

If this is not not your bag, no problemo. I highly recommend you avoid this 3 hour exploratory of just a lot of non-sensical people and their non-sensical lives.

If you ever like to take a good look in the mirror once in a while, check this stuff out, man. Truly astonishing.

In Dreams (1999)

Not bad, not good, so so

[7/10 · 26 December 1999]

Overall there was nothing really really awful about this flick, but it's pretty forgettable as a whole also. It starts out with an interesting if slightly Nightmare on Elm St contrived premise. Annette bening is this seemingly normal lady who is being haunted in her dreams. A series of visionary nightmares lead her down the path to insanity. Along the way she encounters some partly interesting characters and bizarre adventures.

The acting is OK, the story holds up for the most part, the characters are never fully developed and whilst it's not a masterpiece, it is both enjoyable and forgettable if taken with a pich of salt.

Good for a dreary Sunday afternoon, if nothing else.

Angel Heart (1987)

A real horror flick

[10/10 · 9 December 1999]

This is a superb movie. Alan Parker does an amazing job of twisting the viewer's emotions and creating an unforgettable, claustrophobic and uneasy story, that exposes the core of the evil within us all.

The characters are brilliantly played against each other. DeNiro is quite bizarre and this was probably Mickey Rourke's last good movie.

This is an original horror movie, and there is much to horrify.

The Blair Witch Project (1999)

Superb realization of a bad nightmare

[9/10 · 27 November 1999]

Certainly scared the pants off me. There are no monsters or axe wielding psychos that you know you should watch out for to creep up on the characters here. And that is what makes it so so uncomfortable.

This thing is like Road Rules meets Stephen King. If you've ever had a really vivid nighmare that made you feel upset even after you woke up, you'll recognize the familiar senses of confusion, catharsis and the descent into despair that this flick rams down your throat.

Totally original and extremely uncomfortable.

The Sixth Sense (1999)

One for the collection

[10/10 · 27 November 1999]

You know, there is no way I would have imagined Bruce Willis could pull this kind of movie off. He's completely the wrong person for it when you think about it. Usually known for his smarmy, in control hard man action roles, it is totally explosive to see him playing a tortured, confused waif of a man, grasping at straws and completely out of his depth.

But forget Willis, everyone in the movie is compelling for different reasons. The movie itslef is like a box. When you get to the end and see all sides come together, you simply have to marvel at the neatness and cohesiveness with which the whole experience was put together.

Beautifully acted, scripted, photographed and delivered.

10 out of 10.

Sleepy Hollow (1999)

Lives up to it's name: Both Hollow & Sleepy

[2/10 · 20 November 1999]

I really tried to like this one.

I went in with no expectations. I ignored Johnny Depp's incredibly bad accent, his profoundly trite and exaggerated mannerisms and his hammy one liners. I dismissed the disjointed plotline and superficial characterization.

About half an hour into this movie I heard the dulcet tones of someone snoring in one of the rows behind me. I thought to myself, how rude! At that point I was still under the impression that this movie had some hidden substance it was about to unleash on the audience.

Tim, you're a bad bad lad. How could you rob me of my $7? I'm very sure Tim Burton fans will like this, but this movie will seriously make me reconsider ever paying to see a Tim Burton work again.

The only thing which saved the movie a little maybe was Christopher Walken as the deranged face and Ray Park (Darth Maul) as the deranged stunt body of the villain. Even then Burton managed to film the action sequences with such little originality and such a heavy hand on the 'dark is cooool maaan!' lever on his camera that the action was forgettable at best.

So what do we have? Forgettable action padding miserable plot, all wrapped up in misty 'dark is coool maan' shades.

Horrible.

The Deep End of the Ocean (1999)

Really a made for tv effort

[5/10 · 10 October 1999]

The trailers for this looked really good. As it happens they turned out to be the only engaging parts of an otherwise forgettable film as a whole.

The premise behind the movie is an extremely tense and emotional one, but the script and directing let things lag to the point where you realize that this is TV fodder. I half expect to see (better) versions of the same thing on Lifetime TV on some derary Sunday afternoon. What's so confusing is how Pfeiffer and some other apparently great actors wound up in it.

Vampires (1998)

Profoundly awful

[1/10 · 13 September 1999]

This is quite easily the most vacuous film watching experience I have ever had. There is no plot. The action sequences are pure cartoon. The humor is annoyingly inane. The characters are their lines are straight out of cliche hell.

Now I know John Carpenter's style is a little quirky, almost cheesy at times, but this is the guy who literally created the art of tension building in scary movies. This movie just seems like a half baked day dream that he had and decided to put onto film.

Easily John Carpenter's worst movie. Avoid like the plague.

Out of 10?....

Minus infinity.