Number8 Reviews

Guinea Pig 5: Mermaid in the Manhole (1988 Video)

Funny film ... in a disgusting kinda way

[30 November 2004]

WARNING, may contain minor spoilers

I watched this film mainly out of curiosity, given the reputation of the entire Guinea Pig series, and I must say that I am a bit disappointed. While I started really hoping to get totally sick, I wind up laughing at the screen halfway. The problem is that it is very easy to see pass the supposed blood and gore see paint and plastic. I can literately feel the little plastic hoses that squirt out those multi-coloured paint from the puss. When the mermaid's face is deformed by the disease, the face looked more like a plastic mask glue on the actress than something supposedly revolting. And it is obvious that the actress never did put the worms in her mouth, since you never actually see her barfing them out (the camera pans down away from her face at that point). It's really just a clever camera trick.

But it isn't for the lack of trying. That are some genuinely shocking moments in the film, such as when the artist discovered what was inside the mermaid when he chopped up the mermaid after she died. So I am not saying that the film is not disgusting, but I found the low-budget and dated special effects to be laughable.

Story-wise I did like that the film is short and not overly complicated. Obviously the main drawing point is the gore, but there's a pretty decent story as well about lost love, and life in general. And The ending just added an extra layer of mysteriousness into the mix, leaving the viewer thinking just what exactly has transpired.

I still haven't figured it all out myself.

Charlie's Angels (2000)

Fun, and Cleavage

[7/10 · 12 November 2000]

I was pleasant surprised by this movie. It's actually good, which I didn't expect at all. The three angels were a delight to look at, and Bill Murray was fantastic as Bosley. The action was simply amazing with all that wire-work slow-mo freeze-frame Matrix style camera work and the plot actually works though it was a bit predictable. However, I do find the all the "almost" nudity a bit excessive. They were a bit over-the-top. Still, I am not complaining.

Mission: Impossible II (2000)

All Tom Cruise and little of everything else

[3/10 · 23 June 2000]

I never understood the first MI movie. I got lost between plotlines halfway and at the end I was very confused.

Unfortunately, the plot in this sequel also has problems. This time it is too simple with no twist and no surprises. I practically could guess what happens next through the entire movie.

Second of all this movie is all Tom Cruise. While Ethan Hunt had partners, their participation in anything is minimal. Everything happens only to Cruise in this movie, and all you see is Cruise on screen. The "team" aspect is what made the Mission Impossible show so cool. This movie felt like a spy flick a la Bond, James Bond.

Third of all I was not impressed by the action. Maybe I was spoil by the Matrix, but I think this movie is rather tame in the action department. With John Woo at the director's chair I expect so much more. There really isn't a memorable action scene in this movie, which is rather bad for a supposed action movie. Maybe I am just being picky here but I believe that more could be done in this category.

Of course, with Tom Cruise in the lead role this movie is a guaranteed success. I just hope that when the sequel comes out (and I am pretty sure there will be), it will have a more exciting plotline.

Toy Story 2 (1999)

Beautiful, Witty, and Fun

[10/10 · 27 December 1999]

After A Bug's Life I had rather high expectations from Pixar on Toy Story 2, and I am glad to say that it had met them and more.

One good thing was the way the movie expanded beyond Andy's house. The toy barn, the office, the airport, even the streets and roads looked very real, because of the attention to details. I think the ultimate goal of computer generated films is to re-create reality, and Toy Story 2 is one big step closer.

There was plenty of humor too. Except for a the Barbie parts (which I don't think Mattel would like), the movie feature the light-hearted jokes and gags which only a Disney animated film can give you, and the timing was perfect. You don't feel neither overwhelmed because there was too many gags in too little time, nor bored because the jokes were far between. Just the right amount of humor make this film enjoyable.

The best thing however was that the movie was more than just eye-candy. Even though the plot was more or less traditional, it did have many subplots that actually merged together quite nicely. The flow was flawless, as each subplot was given just the right amount of attention. At the end, everything was taken care of and you leave your seat feeling satisfied.

All in all, a very good film for all occasions. Take your kids or go with your friends. Everybody will like it.

The Matrix (1999)

A treat for the eyes

[7/10 · 3 September 1999]

This movie featured some of the best special effects ever. The action was intense and the fighting was superb. Never had I seen anything like it, and I love what I saw on screen, effects wise.

But with the great effects came an inferior storyline. I think they had a good thing going with this "humans enslaved by computers" plot, but it fell short because they tried to explain this very complex concept halfway during the movie in a matter of few minutes, confusing the audience as well as broken down the pace. It would have been better if they took more time to explain it, or didn't explain it at all. Either of these would make the plot a lot easier to follow.

Another bad thing would have to be those instances in the movie where they put some comedic dialogue in, which seemed out of place. I knew it was supposed to be funny, but I just couldn't laugh, kinda like a good joke told wrong. Good thing there were too many of those since they were getting annoying. I also don't like the romance bit a the end where Trinity and Neo. I mean what gives?! The movie was going along just fine then suddenly love becomes a subject. It just seemed so fake and forced. My impression of it was that they decided to put love into the story at the last minute, because it seemed so out of place. Personally, I didn't like that one bit.

All in all, an enjoyable film, but it's definitely not a masterpiece. Do see if for the effects though, because it couldn't get any better than this.

Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me (1999)

Austin Powers' back

[15 August 1999]

I haven't seen the first Austin Powers, so I do not know much about the Austin Powers character or his previous "engagement" with Doctor Evil. Fortunately, I didn't have to know a lot in order to enjoy this movie, since the jokes were pretty self-explanatory. Of course, there will be some people who finds that potty-humour jokes obscene and vulgar, but then that's what should be expected from this movie. Plus, this movie was a great spoof of reality, as it incorporate many stuff of popular culture (the Jerry Springer bit, "Show me the Money!!", and all those James Bond tie-ins, for example). So on the face this movie might seem to be just another crude ride loaded with offensive, off the wall behaviour, but this movie is actually very smart with all the subtle comedy which one might not see. I found it to be very hilarious.

There's Something About Mary (1998)

There's something about Mary, and I agree.

[9/10 · 11 August 1999]

The plot is nothing new: A guy trying to get the love of the one he admired. We all have seen something like this in the past, and we will see something like this in the future. But in this movie the plot isn't important.

When you watch it you just know how it's gonna end, and so the focus is not on the plot but the actual happenings in the movie, and there's a lot. First, the movie is funny, with its many gags that just keeps on coming (a Farrelly Bros. tradition). They might not be in everyone's taste, but at least they aren't forced or out of place. Second, the people seem real enough to be in the situations they brought themselves into (kudos for the great acting, though it could be better). Third, Cameron Diaz is adorable, beautiful, and a marvel to look at. Plus, she got the job carrying the whole movie and she accomplished that ever so gracefully. You just can't help but fall in love with her too, along with every guy in the film.

This is a very good romantic comedy by the Farrelly Bros.. Just like in "Dumb and Dumber" or "King Pin", the brothers have made a comedy that has just the right amount of everything. Excellent job!!