myownnemesis Reviews

Lara Croft: Tomb Raider (2001)

Just like the genre...

[5/10 · 15 June 2001]

Generally, when a movie is made from a video game, it bombs. This movie is no different. It relies too much on the game for Lara's development as a character, and that is all it holds true to the game. In the game she was a rogue, and her father disowned her becuase of her tomb raider-ways. In the movie, she had help from several others and her father wanted her to be an archeologist(like him).

The action sequences were weak and unbelievable. Terrible character development. The ending, not the resolution, was just bad. Personally I think it would've been a bit better had it alluded to the games(specifically the very first one with the Scion and Atlantis). It seems the plot of the movie was somewhat based on that, but altered. The game had an artifact called the Scion which 'gave the holder powers of God himself'. The abuse of that power led to the downfall of Atlantis. The Scion was divided and hidden across the earth. The movie had the Triangle of Light which gave its holder the 'power of God and time'. The abuse of that power led to the downfall of that city. The triangle was divided and hidden across the earth.

I rate it 5/10. My suggestion is wait for the movie to come out on video, and just play the games.

Lost Souls (2000)

horrid waste

[1/10 · 13 October 2000]

i went to see this movie with a group of buds late on friday the 13th. this was one of the worst 2 hours and $5.25 i've ever spent. the plot was shotty, the character development was non-existent, and the ending was just plain bad. another 'end of the world' flick that has no point. there was no action sequences, the so called 'exorcism' scenes were incredibly weak, the character backgrounding was so loose that i didnt understand a whole lot even at the end when it was all s'posed to come together. even the first exorcism in the opening scene was almost pulled straight from The Exorcist.

so to put it all short; DONT SEE THIS, WASTE OF TIME AND MONEY

The Legend of Zelda (1986 Video Game)

Truly the best

[10/10 · 29 August 2000]

Back in the day when there weren't 32-bit processors and 10 button controls, there was The Legend of Zelda. I grew up on the game and it still remains(to this day) my favorite video game of all time. I still have an original Nintendo and a Zelda cartridge, but the Nintendo doesn't work all too well. If it did, I would spend more time playing that game.

The Legend of Zelda is the ORIGINAL Final Fantasy and Tomb Raider.

Total Request Live (1998–2019)

biggest load of Commy BS!

[22 August 2000]

TODAY's LINE-UP... THE SAME 10 VIDEOS PLAYED YESTERDAY, ONLY IN A SLIGHTLY DIFFERENT ORDER!!!

Get some variety in there. 65 days should be 35 days. 65 days is enough time for those teen boppers to absorb all the publicity and pre-pubescent fans cheering them on, and then to shoot another video covered with horrid dance moves and revealing clothing. They honestly should do something to get more out of it. But the sad part of it all is TRL and MTV Jams countdown are pretty much the only times MTV plays videos anymore(except for the hours between 2-5am when everybodies sleeping).

They carefully handpick the 'beautiful people' to be in their studio audience, and then the cameras only pan on good lookers on the street. when was the last time you saw a fat ugly girl in the studio? in the street audience, everyone is holding signs 'i love nsync' 'britney is the best' and 'carson, let us up'. sad really. It like they are programming us. And Carson can't think for himself. I never heard him badmouth a boyband. He can't on national TV.

Basically, TRL is a front for a communist takeover. They brainwash you with the teen boppers and boybands. Then they send in the boyband attack drones to rid of all non-fans(a.k.a. those with the age in double-digits and IQs higher than their shoe size). Mass hysteria, total anarchy, cats and dogs living together. Then all the girls are put into bare midrifts, hosed-on make up, and given breasts faker than their personality. Conversations are prerecorded and lip synced. Girls deny the obvious and then later admit to it.

Please, boycott TRL to prevent this tragedy.

Clerks (2000–2001)

Oh yeah!

[31 May 2000]

When I finally heard that Clerks was doing a TV show, i thought 'cool'. time passed by. until last week when i was watching ABC and they had a preview of it. i set this moment in time aside. and then the moment came...

FUNNY AS HELL!!! i watched it and laughed so many times. it is just so damn funny! the animation is great and so are the lines. although it cant have all the raunchy language and other stuff the movie did, they seemed to clean this up really well. i know that every wednesday at 9:30 will become an almost religious day in my house.

by the way, i am writing this during the second commercial break

Carpool (1996)

fairly nice

[17 August 1999]

corny, cheesy, but it still made me laugh. mostly clean humor, but still funny. Tom Arnold made it funny, but Rachael Leigh Cook made it worth watching(especially in a tight, short see-through shirt and a mini skirt) oh lord, thank you!

anyway, this is a good movie for 11-13 kids, but i rented it anyway. worth watching as one of those "there's nothing else to rent' movies. i give it a 6/10

The Eighteenth Angel (1997)

Great movie, recommend to all!

[9/10 · 7 August 1999]

I rented this movie on the only reason that Rachael Leigh Cook was in it, and now i wanna buy it! this is a very good movie(how the hell could it get only a 4.9?!?!) Rachael Leigh Cook did a tremendous job. she made her part very believable. the standard movie starts at one point, and the rest of the movie branches off from there, while u know exactly what is going on. but not this movie. this kept me guessing well into it. and the ending was a twist(i won't say right now)

i recommend this movie for anybody who enjoys movies that don't follow the set pattern of hollywood(the guy gets the girl, the good guy always wins, the bad guy dies, all i good at the end) i AM going to go out and buy this movie(not just because Rachael Leigh Cook is in it, although it is a very good reason to)

The Simpsons (1989– )

No competition

[26 July 1999]

This is, BY FAR the best TV show of all time. I'm a junior in high school, and yet i still watch it religiously, as well as pretty much everyone else in my school. There is no substitute for odd humor, pure stupidity and getting drunk at Moe's every night.

In my opinion, the Simpsons is THE BEST. I just can't wait for the movie