HCG714 Reviews

Mystic River (2003)

"Mystic River" is not that mystical.

[3/10 · 28 October 2003]

"Mystic River" was "not one of the best films of 2003, nor one of the worst films of2003, it was just there in the middle.

I'm still scratching my head and wondering what all the buzz and fuss is about in "Mystic River", except mabey for the over the top performance by some of today's hottest talents. The whole film like one big case study in Acting 101.

Like I have stated the only fun in this plodding production is trying to figure out who gives the most over the top performance. Is it Sean Penn, complete with gnashing teeth and tightly flexed biceps, doing a second-rate Kirk Douglas? Or is it Laurence Fishburne trying to be the next Sidney Poitier for a new generation? Or is it Marcia Gay Harden, whose gaping mouth and wide eye stare recall a fish on ice? Or Laura Linney, who fills her mouth with so many flattened vowels that her Boston accent comes off as fake as Kevin Costner's in "13 Days"? & Ms. Linney really doesn't do anything in the film until the final 10 minutes anyways. I kept getting the feeling through out the film like Clnt kept saying on the set of "Mystic River" more acting more acting less plot less plot!

I've always thought that Clint Eastwood is a fine actor, and often a fine director, too. But most of the time when he adapts books that he claims to love into movies, I'm alternating between boredom and disbelief. "Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil" was such a fascinating, insidious and evilly fun little story... until Eastwood got a hold of it.

The story was flat, predectiable and by the end I felt "Mystic River" lacked something big. It was like eating a slice of cake with out the frosting. When you finally find out who murdered Jimmy's daughter (after a grueling 2 hours and 15 minutes), it's contrived, convoluted and laughable.

Mystic River may not be the "worst" movie I've seen all year, but it certainly is the most dull, dreary and disappointing (I give it a generous C-, in case you haven't guessed).

I didn't hate Mystic River - I was just incredibly disappointed by the film.

Open Range (2003)

The western genre is back!

[8/10 · 28 October 2003]

Just as audiences and critics seem relegated to writing him off entirely--as both a filmmaker and an actor--he returns with one of 2003's best films in "Open Range."

Kevin Costner is back in the saddle again, and I can I can start using "Oscar" and "Costner" in the same sentence again. His latest film, which he has also directed and spent a good deal rewriting, smacks of the same talent he showed when he won an Academy Award for directing "Dances With Wolves."

Showing a simple and subtle style, he has created a classic Western that focuses on a romance of two aging characters. Costner managed to convince world-class actors such as Annette Bening, Robert Duvall and Michael Gambon into what is considered a "dead" genre in movies -- Westerns and make them good, very good. ...and talking about the casting!! Annette Bening rocked again in another great role. Free of botox and make-up she looked great and her on screen romance with Mr Coster was pure Hollywood heaven. Sweet and romantic without going over the top. & the chemistry was there all they way til the credits rolled. This small but suttle role might just get Ms. Bening another shot at Oscar gold.

The movie does its main thing, its raison d'etre, brilliantly: It tells you how the West was won.

Wonderland (2003)

A dark walk on "Wonderland" Ave.

[9/10 · 26 October 2003]

"Wonderland" is another film I'm adding to my "Best Films of 2003" list!

Another cult film in years to come!

If you like true crime bio-pics with a dash of Hollywood mystery "Wonderland" is a film for you!

The 1981 Wonderland Avenue murders are an enduring chapter of B-Hollywood mythology, and writer/director James Cox's screenplay is a never-a-dull-moment winner, brimming with character and tension. Split screen and other catchy techniques add to, but do not detract from, the beguiling narrative.

I also love the the way the director opened the film too great job of getting me sucked into the story faster! The opening credits flicker with snippets of Holmes' blue movies to the tune of Bad Company's `Shooting Star'.

Another nifty device has the camera zooming into a newspaper page before a flashback, literally bringing the headlines to life.

The touches help make "Wonderland" an engrossing, if harrowing, trip through the looking glass.

Director/co-write r James Cox does a superlative job of holding the reins on this four-in-hand cinematic collage, showing the same story from several points of view but never losing sight of the most compelling concepts.

I can't wait to see what director James Cox will come out with next!

Val Kilmer who must be the hardes't, most under-rated actor in Hollywood today gives another electric performance. Next to his role in "The Salton Sea" this has to be Mr. Kilmer's 2nd greatest role.

Never a dull moment from start to finsh, and the wide range of actors sprinkled through out just show just how talented these under rated talents are. From Lisa Kudrow to Kate Bosworth and to Josh Lucas they were just awsome to watch on screen.

"Wonderland" is a dark and gritty film -- literally. If your open minded and love your films down and real "Wonderland" is for you!

"Wonderland" is one of the few movies so far this year that is well worth your time, your money and your undivided attention.

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003)

What cinematic blasphemy to re-make a cult classic!!!

[6/10 · 20 October 2003]

!!!Another film I'm adding to my "Worst Films of 2003" list!!

If today's generation is too LAZY to rent the orginial and Hollywood is too LAZY and money hungry to re-release the orginial 1974 film then don't re-make a cult classic!! IT's pointless and stupid and turns Tobe Hopper into a joke and a hack director hanging on too fading glory!!

What cinematic blasphemy to re-make a cult classic, what next a re-make of "Alien"!!

This watered-down, MTV-generation horror movie is nowhere near as clever or scary as it thinks it is. It's just cheesy . . . but not in a good way.

It took "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre" about 15 minutes before all my anticipation was completely stripped away and replaced with utter boredom. Instead of figuring out a way of reinventing the film for a new generation, it merely spends most of its time simply restaging many of the key moments from the earlier film!!

(Another one of the keys to the original was the fact that, for all of its supposed carnage, there is almost no on-screen blood or violence on display-Hooper suggested it so expertly with his editing and sound effects that the mind created more mayhem than there actually was in the final product!!!

Did Tobe Hopper need to make his housepayment that bad to allow a re-make??!?.

The most idiotic "improvement" in "TCM" has to do with the character of the infamous Leatherface. The reason he became an instant horror icon (besides his tendency to wear the skinned-off faces of his victims) was because he had no backstory to speak of; he was simply the bogeyman incarnate and would kill you in horrible ways for no other reason than the simple fact that you were standing in the wrong place at the wrong time. Here, the insane decision has been made to attempt to "humanize" the character to make his actions less inexplicable. Instead of being a faceless monster, we learn that his real name is Thomas Brown Hewitt and that he was driven to kill because as a child, he developed an ugly skin disease that caused the other kids to make fun of him!!

First time director Marcus Nispel deserves the "Raseberry Award" for Worst director and then run out of Hollywood!!

POINT-LESS RE_MAKE!!

ADVENGE BAD RE-MAKES!!!

The only logic at work in Marcus Nispel's strenuously literal-minded and unfunny re-make is economic. Take the brand-name title, strip the original of everything that made it buzz, crank up the gore and yuck factor, and sell it to an audience more likely to know Leatherface as an icon than a character.

Buffalo Soldiers (2001)

A new cult film for a new generation!

[10/10 · 19 October 2003]

Even if the film was supposed to be released in 2001, Im still adding "Buffalo Soldiers" to my "Best Films of 2003" list!! This long-delayed release may one day be regarded as a minor find, and mabey a under-ground cult classic thanks to some occasionally gruesome laughs, tight story construction and terrific supporting performances by Ed Harris, Scott Glenn, Anna Paquin, Dean Stockwell and Elizabeth McGovern.

Kuddos too to director Australian filmmaker Gregor Jordan for making a fresh and funny film with edge! I can't wait for his next film!

and....Joaquin Phoenix gives the best performance of his career right up there with "Clay Pigeons" as a supply clerk for a division based in Germany. Joaquin Phoenix manages to generate real sympathy for an essentially nasty character with a touch of compassion but near-zero conscience.

First off: This is a very dark comedy not meant for everyone, but if you have a twisted sense of humor, you will have a twisted good time.

"Buffalo Soldiers" is merely a modern update of "Catch-22," wiht a dash of "MASH" but it feels like the right time for exactly that.

Dark and often outrageously funny, "Buffalo Soldiers" uses fiction to tell a truth that's supposed to stay deeply buried in George Bush's bellicose America

Buffalo Soldiers snaps, crackles and pops in the spirit of 1970's Catch-22 - another satire on military life.

Kill Bill: Vol. 1 (2003)

Quentin Tarantino is back - with a vengeance!!

[10/10 · 10 October 2003]

WOW!!!

"Kill Bill: Volume 1" is another film I'm adding to the top of my "Best Films of 2003" list!!

The new story is actually quite simple: Uma Thurman plays an elite killer -- nicknamed Black Mamba and a member of the Deadly Viper Assassination Squad (DiVAS) -- who has been in a coma for four years. When she awakes, she realizes she was betrayed by the DiVAS, who left her for dead in a pool of blood at her own wedding. The 4 years later she emerges from a coma and swears revenge on her former master and his deadly squad of international assassins.

Supremely demented and grotesquely gorgeous, "Kill Bill -- Vol. 1" is a movie that will separate the true cinema lovers from ... well, just about everyone who has another set of values

Quentin Tarantino has done it again!! After 6 years Mr. Tarantino delievers the film that fans of his films have been waiting to see!

Watching "Kill Bill" you realize that no one combines tension and release, violence and humor, dialogue and action and music and pictures the way he does.

Tarantino pulls out all the stops, not only with his odd assortment of characters, but with the use of split screen, slow motion and every other special effect he can find.

"Kill Bill" is all about the action. Remember how ridiculously lame the big fight scene between Neo and the thousand Agent Smiths in "The Matrix Reloaded" looked? You won't get any of that here. There's no CG, and that makes the fight scenes so much more satisfying.

Uma Thurman gives one hell of a tour de' force perfomance. She is both fragile and delicate then in the next moment she is lets it all go. If the Gods smile upon Uma she could be looking at her 2nd Oscar nod next year!

And Volume 2? I can't wait.

Once Upon a Time in Mexico (2003)

Mexico is where we want to be!

[10/10 · 6 October 2003]

Me and those other 10 "Desperado" fans have been waiting quite a while for "Once Upon A Time in Mexico". Finally, it is here! And it doesn't disappoint!

I'm adding this film to the top of my "Best Films of 2003" list!

This third chapter in Rodriguez's Mariachi trilogy is perhaps his best film yet!!

Mr. Rodriguez has taken his work in 1995's Desperado, Mexico's precursor, and blown it up to mammoth, thrilling proportions.

Mr. Rodriguez has such a singular vision which shows in the strength of the film's various storylines and thematic threads. And it works on three levels that merge strangely but sure-handedly: as a zany comic farce, as a violent action movie and as a political examination of American intervention in Latin America.

Mr. Rodriguez also does a fine job in bringing together a plethora of diverse characters, all well-played by addictively watchable under-rated character actors (Mickey Rourke and his Chihuahua, Willem Dafoe, Cheech Marin, Salma Hayek for about 5 minutes, Eva Mendes, Danny Trejo, (and many more).

How can you resist a movie that features Willem Dafoe sporting a tan, Mickey Rourke cradling a Chihuahua and Johnny Depp turning in another oddball tour de force? It's all there in Robert Rodriguez's gloriously incoherent salute to action movie mythology, "Once Upon a Time in Mexico,' another giddy exercise in genre busting from a filmmaker who has become the best one-man band working in movies today.

Cabin Fever (2002)

This is more like the film horror fans have been waiting a decade to avoid.

[1/10 · 19 September 2003]

"Cabin Fever" is one film I'm adding to the top of my "Worst Films of 2003" list.

Poorly written, poorly directed, and just a really bad over hyped horror film!

My partner & I are still wondering why "Cabin Fever" was wowed at the 2002 Toronto International Film Festival. Did we miss something?

"Cabin Fever" as to be the most over hyped indi horror film to come out of a studio since the very crappy and very over rated "Blair Witch Project".

As far as the plot to the film goes, a group of five college students get done with their finals and go off to celebrate at a lonesome cabin out in the woods. The college students in "Cabin Fever" meet up with a blood-spewing infected who's been made all the more nasty with some disease.

Sounds like a great set-up right? Wrong! What we get instead is a movie with too many plot holes, not enough horror, and a director who didn't know if he was making a spoof, a comedy or a horror film.

I'm a huge horror fan, and I was really expecting so much. What I got instead was a silly horror film where a director used other peoples films I.E. "The Evil Dead", "Night of the Lving Dead" etc to make a film. What started off as a good idea turned into a mess of ideas and plot. I mean pancakes, a child who bites, crazy backwoods people. "Cabin Fever" was just too much and too over the top to be taken seriously or scary.

The only thing missing from this mess was a cameo by Bruce Campbell!

"Cabin Fever is about as scary as a third-grade play.

Who did "Cabin Fever" Director and Screenwriter Eli Roth have to sleep with to get Peter Jackson to claim that his horror film was the one that fans had been waiting a decade to attend?

There is promise and potential around every corner in this film. It's too bad that the pacing of the movie is abhorrent. You'll find yourself bored, more often than not, while watching what is apparently a "greatest hit" clip from past horror flicks.

Don't believe the hype, as the only frightening thing about this effort is how it received a nationwide theatrical release rather than an instant burial in the straight to video market.

The only thing scary about Cabin Fever is that well-connected hacks get deals.

"Cabin Fever" rates as a 1 out of 10.

The Order (2003)

"The Order" a movie train heading for a wreck.

[1/10 · 7 September 2003]

CONTAINS SPOLIER!

"The Order" is another film I'm adding to my: "Worst Films of 2003" list!!

The notion of a sin eater-an individual who ritually consumes the offenses of a dying person, is a fascinating religious curiosity, one that could easily serve as the basis for a thoughtful, challenging, scary film. What we get instead is a poorly written and very poorly directed film. Nothing really exciting happend in this film, it was boring and silly and after the credtis rolled I honestly walked out and said "What the hell was this film about?"!

The material just isn't there, and in my opinion Heath Ledger and Shannyn Sossamon don't naturally exude personality on the big screen.

Heath Ledger he has the talents, but it just seems he is wasting them a way in a bad films like this or the equally bad "The Four Feathers". The equally bad Shannyn Sossamon who looks like a boy) doesn't add much to the already laughable, lifeless, bland story.

One of the silliest plot lines in "The Order" involves a romance between Ledger's and Sossamon's characters. The romance plot line comes out slowly, & when it does we find out Sossamon's character was once one of his old exorcism patients who tried to kill him (I'm not making this up).

"The Order" is not boring, per se. It is simply a movie with no place to go, and no idea how to get to where it's not going. It keeps getting sidetracked. Witness the scene with Thomas and Alex in a sewer under a church, where Alex almost drowns and Thomas gets mildly impaled with little knives: What does THAT have to do with anything?

Once the Sin-Eater is located -- with an hour left to go -- the film truly flounders. If there is yet a purpose, plot-wise, it is not made clear. Instead, we watch these nice-looking folks run around Rome (looking like the Hardy Boys with no purpose) performing various acts that don't seem to be leading anywhere.

As One Review stated:

Maybe what Hollywood needs is a bomb eater, some poor soul who would take the blame for awful movies so that the real offending parties, both in front of the camera and behind it, could escape censure. If such an individual existed, he'd certainly have much to feast on as a result of `The Order.'

Freaky Friday (2003)

Great Summer 2003 film!

[10/10 · 25 August 2003]

"Freaky Friday" is one film I'm adding to my "Best Films of 2003" list!

In this sumer of pointless sequels, big F/X and movies that were forgettable as yesterdays news; "Freaky Friday" was a fresh funny movie.

Jamile Lee Curtis has never been funnier or more fun to watch since "A Fish Called Wanda". It's easy to forget how fabulous she is at physical comedy, then you see her in "Freaky Friday" & you see what a great actress she really is. Jamie Lee Curtis steals the film as the confident mother, and then steals it from herself as the befuddled daughter in the mother's body.

This is one role that Ms. Curtis should be looked at for a Golden Globe for Best Actress in a comedy! I laughed at her performance till my sides hurt. It was wonderfull to see Ms. Curtis in a great comedy, its been too long!

As one Critic stated I and have to 100% agree:

"Freaky Friday" represents the rarity of Hollywood working on a professional level, delivering superior product and asking us to support it. The movie was made with finesse, with concern for little things like story and character, with considerable wit, with a good idea of the plot's possibilities.

Such a fun-for-all matinee delight that it cleansed my palate of the sour taste of every bad movie I've seen this summer.

At the film's end, I realized I had completely escaped into the fantasy and comedy laid out before me for 90 minutes. Now, any movie that can do that is doing something very right indeed.

It's a solid, funny, human hour-and-a-half of the most pleasant escapism I've seen this summer.

Now if only more films that came out this 2003 summer did just that it would have been a better film going summer.

Freddy vs. Jason (2003)

10 Years later & all we get a script that was written only in 10 minutes!

[1/10 · 21 August 2003]

"Freddy Vs. Jason" is one film I'm adding "not" only my Worst FIlms of 2003"list, but I'm also adding it to my "Worst Horror Films" list!

"Freddy Vs. Jaaon" qualifies for the Turkey award for worst film, or even a "Raseberry Award for worst film of 2003, along with a Raseberry Award for worst director.

I was really expecting a lot more style from director Yu, who I thought did a great job with "BRIDE OF CHUCKY".

The movie was just boring with scattered plot twists her and ther ethat never seeme to go anywhere but into a big vat of laughable dialogue and bad acting!

Like one critic stated, and I 100% agreee: "After more than a decade of brainstorming, here's what New Line has: Freddy and Jason stage a contest to see who can kill the most teenagers. Jason surges ahead, Freddy gets jealous, so they go at each other. The end."

"Freddy Vs. Jason" was all hype and build up because the studios knew that in the true horror fans hearts this movie was not going to live up to its hype. I was so excitied to see "Jason Vs. Freddy", & after waiting for almost 10 yrs; I went opening night, what a waste of time and money. I almost walked out to see "Open Range".

Or as another critic stated: But "Freddy vs. Jason" doesn't have any of the creepy suspense that graced the first "Friday" movies, and very little of the Daliesque dream imagery of the early "Nightmares." It's just a slam-bang succession of gross-out mutilations, played for giggles".

The worst thing was the mistake in locations when the went from Springfield which is in California to Camp Crystal Lake which I believe in New Jersey. Yeah it only takes 2 hrs to drive across the US!

Here's a tip: Kelly Rowland (of Destiny's Child) stick to music! Your a bad actress in a really bad film!

No offense but Roger Corman should have directed "Freddy Vs. Jason". He could it have done it at 1/2 the cost and made a better movie.

Thelma & Louise (1991)

The Movie the defined: 1991!!

[10/10 · 18 July 2003]

The movie that is and alwsays be at the top of "My Best Films of 1991" right next too "My Own Private Idaho"!

This female power movement "Movie" struck a movement boost in the ways woman felt, thought about and wanted, from young and old, to old and young. "Thelma & LoOuise"! "Thelma & Louise" said what gay men/woamn were afraid to say, but it took shape and force, these silent voice through film & in to the world; it gave a voices to the the hundreds broken hearted, lonely hearted, wild hearted people wanted to say. These voices came thorugh the bodys of two of the most beatifull woman sill under-rated by Hollywood and praised by critics and silent film buff's worldwide, "Geena Davis" and "Miss. Susan Sarandon"!!

Bravu "Hollywood for you"!

Screenwriter Callie Khouri, here's a tip, make soemthing that was what "Thelma & Louise" had. IT had orginiality, it had led to millions of discussions over java and milke shakesand late night dinners.

A new cult film was born of 1991!

Please Hollywood realease it!! A directors cut on the big screen would be nice!

The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen (2003)

This film is Extraordinary!

[10/10 · 14 July 2003]

WOW!! "LXG" is one film I'm adding to the top of my "Best Films of 2003" list!

This has to be the summer's 2003 smartest, most exhilarating action attraction.

Based on the comic books by Alan Moore who also did the graphic novel "From Hell". Mr. Moore delievered another interesting story that in years will stand aprt and on its own as soemthing very unique and diffrent.

"LXG" was just a great, cool off beat film. In a summer of loser sequels and blockbuster films that don't feel orginial, "LXG" delivered the goods.

Stephen Norrington understands comic books don't have to conform to human logic because they have their own logic, & with "LXG" he did just that. Instead of amkeing the audience fell like you were watchinn the action he placed in the story. Director Norrington knows how to navigate a sure course between classic Victorian mystery and camp entertainment spiked with literary and movie in-jokes

Not to mention "LXG" has great Cinematography, costumes and sets too.

"LXG" worked on all levels and never missed a beat! Sean Connery was perfect as the legendary adventurer Allan Quatermain. Mr. Connery showed once again what a great talent he is and he still has the magic to keep our eyes glued to the screen.

The one performance I loved the most was Peta Wilson as Mina Harker. Ms. Wilson rocked, and every single scean she was in she held your attention.

What I liked the most besides the interesting story line was that each character gets their own sequence in which we learn something about them individually. Which enchanced the story & helped the characters take form before ours and step form the pages of classics books to become human.

"The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen" is old-fashioned, Saturday matinee fun spotlighting larger-than-life heroes, a masked mystery villain, deadly perils and scientific wonders.

Another new "Cult Film" is born!

Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl (2003)

"The Fog meets "Treasure Island".

[3/10 · 13 July 2003]

Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl" has to be one film I'm addding to my "Worst Films of 2003" list.

"Pirates" has to be "one" of the oddest, strangest, most over-the-top, far out, blockbuster film's of the summer 2003 lot. For starters, director Verbinski isn't enough of a stylist to pull off the script's delicate balancing act. As he showed with the "The Mexican" Verbinski has problems finding just the right tone between humor and adventure. The film is never quite funny enough to make us forget that dramatically it's pretty slim stuff. With is combination of action, comedy, over the top acting, big sets and one-liners this movie couldn't be taken too seriously for an action film and it so far off the map that it couldn't be called a comedy.

For one thing Johnny Depp, who delivers what has to be the strangest lead performance in a $150 million Hollywood production to date, and has to be the only one brave enough to play a gay drunk pirate this side of the Caribbean. Wait until you see what Depp does here. You can't take your eyes off him!! He is funny, crazy and he over takes every single scean he is in. Even Geoffrey Rush is over shadowed by Depps's over the top performance.

Geoffrey Rush was great in his role as Barbossa, and it shows what a great actor Geoffrey Rush really his; and how multi-talented he really his even when he sells out to crap like "The Banger Sisters" or "pirates" He can make a really bad role work for him. But it was Depp's film and he ran with it!

Keira Knightley, well not much to say except she is a really bad actress and how many times do we have to set her either wet or getting her clothes ripped off with out once having bad hair or runny make-up?

Orlando Bloom was flat, his character was a cardbaord cut out of every single character out to rescuse the woman he loves and finds himself an adventure.

"Pirates" was a bad movie, but Depp's over the top performance was the best thing and the only thing besides the over top F/X and interesting story line that keeps this mess afloat!

Yes folks; the story had promise. Real promise. But somewhere between directors Gore Verbinski ideas, and producer Jerry Bruckheimer's ideas the story somehow merged 2 diffrent out looks with no real mediuem. The whole film felt like "Treasure Island" meets "The Fog"!

With a running time of two hours plus, "Pirates of the Caribbean" feels terribly flabby, even the over the top battle scenes are so drawn out we start to lose interest.

Depp's odd performance should probably make this film live on as a cult classic and become recognized by film buff's as a bad film that we love.

One word to describe "Pirates" is "BIZZARE"!

Cutthroat Island (1995)

One of the all time greatest pirate films ever made!

[10/10 · 13 July 2003]

One film I added to my "Best Films of 1995" list!!

I still don't know why this film was never a hit. I mean it was no Best Picture contender, but it was a great action film and it was Renny Harlin at the top of his game!

Geenea Davis never looked better and director Renny Harlin has never made a more action packed film since Cutthroat Island or after Cutthroat Island!

I saw the film 2xs when it first hit theaters, then bought my copy as soon as it it video (this was before DVD came into play then I up-graded my copy) and I loved it then and I still love it!

It's just a great ol' adventure story about a female pirate (Geena Davis looking really good) and her companion race against their rivals to find a hidden island that contains a fabulous treasure. Whats up against her besides her nasty uncle is a crew that is sceptical of her leadership abilities, so she must complete her quest before they mutiny against her.



I think the reason so many critics hated it was because it was a woman doing what men only thought they could do and a woman doing it better!

The plot had strong action, great lines and a strong plot with a fiery woman's point of view, with lots of action and romance with that ol' B movie adventure fell that still to this day keeps me on the edge of my seat no matter how many times I watch it!

Bravo Renny Harlin and Geena Davis!!

Who knows with a stroke of luck and a few movie buffs like me who love this little undiscovered lost treasure of a film it may just one day see the light of day as a un-song hero of pirate films and become a cult classic!

One can only hope!

Killing Me Softly (2002)

B movie thrillers can't be better than this!!

[5/10 · 8 July 2003]

If you love bad movies, with really bad over the top acting, a really bad screenplay that cries out for Tv, and a plot that is so silly and over the top that you can almost tell what is coming next "KIlling Me Softly" is your movie!!!

Heather Graham proves once again she is a good actress with a talent for picking bad scripts that waste her talents and shows her skin, and Joeseph Fiennes proves once again he will never be his brother and that he has to be one of the most under-rated actors working today to pick a soft core porn film like this.

"Killing Me Softly" is a camp cult classic for a whole new generation.

It's "9 1/2 Weeks" meets "Sleeping With the Enemy"!!

S.F.W. (1994)

S.F.W.: Watching paint dry is more fun than this!!

[1/10 · 5 July 2003]

S.F.W. the concept was interesting the plot once watched was lame and boring a true waste of a casts time and a industry's money.

Once you see it you will soon forget it!!

Stephen Dorff & Reese Witherspoon just waste there time & talents in a really wasted script. With a better more talented screenwriter and a more talent director the movie could have been so much more mabey even some underground cult film. But what happens to a story about 5 people that are being held hostage in a convenience store for 36 days, & one of them demands from the hostage takers that all TV-stations should broadcast the entire situation live, turns into a boring little movie with nothing more than a loud soundtrack and really bad over the top acting in a really bad made for Tv movie of the week for the big screen.

Whats funny is that Reese Witherspoon is billed as a main character, she is on the cover of the DVD box but she is hardly in the movie, and when she is on screen she shows what talent she does have, but how much of it is wasted.

Stephen Dorff is a great actor, another of the under-rated talents in Hollywood today who seems to find really bad scripts that just really under-rate his talent and "S.F.W." is just another film that is a big mistake on his acting resume.

Rounding out the rest of cast that sseem to waste there talents is both Jake Busey and the very laughable not so talented Natasha Gregson Wagner.

One film I'm adding to my "Worst Films of 1994" list!!!

See it once, if you don't fall asleep, and once the credits roll you will soon forget it.

The Truth About Charlie (2002)

Hollywood stop trying to make re-makes!

[1/10 · 22 October 2002]

Another film to add to the on-going list of "Worst Films of 2002" list. I saw "The Truth About Charlie" at an advance screening and all I have to say is "Thank God I didn't waste my $8.00"! I was 100% dissapointed, I waited almost a full year to see the re-make being a huge fan of the 1963 romantic thriller film "Charade". But when I finally got to see it I just wanted to curl up and sleep. "The Truth About CHarlie" started off exciting, but about an 1/2 an hour into the film it just go's really slow moving, predectiable and just boring with a huge capital "B". Director Jonathan Demme didn't know what tone or mood he wanted in this film, and by being this consfused he added to many plot elements and silly ideas into a story that was simply a romantic thriller. The best scene in the film is the Tango scene, the worst part of the film was the very long drawn out ending and the worst character was Charle's own mother showing up to add more confusion to an already old idea and a story that was zooming out of control. "The Truth About Charlie" was the 3rd attempt at re-making this classic story but the 3rd time is not always a charmed one! "The Truth About Charlie" is poorly directed, poorly acted and poorly mis-casted. The problams with "The Truth About Charlie" is for one it lacks the wit, the style and sopistication of the 1963 romantic thriller. Thandie Newton dosen't have the style (nor the right clothes) to fill the Hepburn role. Ms. Newton didn't seemed to be confused if she should paly the role funnty, stupid or cute. Mr. Walberg just seemed too wooden to be a romantic lead, and as well he lacked the sopistication for the lead role. The other problams was the plot was all over the place with an ending that was just dull and flat. "The Truth About Charlie" didn't know if was a coemdy, a thriller or even romantic. The film started off interesting enough with some great opening credits, but midway through the plot started getting boring and flat. Even if you seen the orginial James Mason film or the 1963 film; a re-make should still seem somewhat fresh and updated. I've heard in interviews that director Demme stated making "The Truth About Charlie" was complicated movie to find the right tone. Watching the film it shows that Demme wasn't the director to handle a film like "The Truth About Charlie" since Demme's tone was all over the place! This re-make was more stale and lifeless and again the ending was just silly and left me bored. I just can't see why Hollywood can't stop making re-makes of good classic Hollywo od films, and invest the money to clean up the orginials and re-lease them to the general public?

The Quiet American (2002)

A film that needs to see the light of day!

[10/10 · 18 October 2002]

Another Best of 2002 (or 2001 since its been shelved for so long). I saw "The Quite American" at the 2002 25th Denver International Film Festival and all I can say is wow! Excellent direction by Phillip Noyce, gret script and a cast in top form. "The Quite American" is a rare film in todays movie market that actually has a story to tell, an interesting plot that keeps you guessing from the moment it begins to the shocking ending and characters that have a life and are not just cardboard. "The Quite American" is at once a spohisticated drama of political intrigue, a murder mustery and a love story all set to the back drop of the coming Vietnam war. This film is based on a Graham Green novel, and its well know he felt the 1958 version was watered down. Micahel Caine (in another Oscar worthy role) plays Thomas Fowler a British foreign correspondent and Alden Pyle (Brremdan Fraser) is an American aid worker (or is he?) who is both frighteningly sure he knows right from wrong in a morally ambigous situation. This film was shelved by "Miramax Films" back in 2001 and has never see the lght of day. A very powerfulll film that opens alot of doors filled with questions on right and wrong and our stand as Americans against war. I think "Miramax" was just scared to put this films in theaters since they are afarid themselves of people having an open mind and asking the very same questions themselves what is truly right or worng in today's changing world. A truly must see for anyone that wants an intelligent and moving story. Well worth the $8.00 to see.

The Grey Zone (2001)

"The Grey Zone"" is all grey!

[1/10 · 18 October 2002]

Another film to add to the list of "Worst Films of 2002"! I saw this film an the 25th Denver International Film festivale. Poorly written, poorly directed and poorly acted. When I saw this film based on a little-know episode of the Holocaust I was expecting an interesting bio-pic, but what I got was an over the top gore fest for the "Troma" crowd and a film with little to no story, spirit or any substance. Move over "One Hour Photo" you just met your match for one of the worst films of 2002! Director Tim Blake Nelson took an important event in hisrtoy and turned it into a gore fest that lacked any real plot or characters with an ending that was just way to brutal that the entire cast and crew needed to be slapped around for being so insenstive. By the time the film ended I was sick at the thought that some hack director turned an important issue into a joke. I heard the film ccost just under a budget of $5 milion to make. Where the $5 milion went I would like to know since it didn't go into the script or characters. Harvey Keitel was so miscasted, and his German accent kept coming and going that he was more laughable than scary as an SS officer. Mira Sorvino just showed after winning an Oscar oh so long ago that she is now a 100% Hollywood sell out to make such a trashy little film. As of this film I have lost all respect for Ms. Sorvino as an actress and I could careless if she retired today from making anymore films. What ever David Arquette was trying to prove as actor with his performance just never made it on to the screen, and he proved once again he dosen't have any really skill or acting talent and that he needs to take acting lessons quick. I just couldn't beleive how an entire cast could just simply waste there talents on a messy film with little substance and no plot. The plot kept going in circles, characters didn't connect with each other and again the violence was over the top mayhem that it kept taking away from the story not adding to it. I understand "The Grey Zone" is suppposed to be a morally complex story, but what was morally wrong was the lack of character development and plot. It took nearly 45 minutes before the film got to its main plot point of a revolt. The film wasn't superbly acted and nor did this film depict the resilience of the human spirit. John Wells was supposed to be at the screening, but I lfet before I had a chance to meet this man or I would ave asked this man point blank "Why did you make this film? Did you need money that bad or a job that bad to make such a rally crappy film that really dosen't tell a story"? "The Grey Zone" should get Raseberry Awards for: Worst film of 2002, Worst director & worst ensemble cast in entire film. This is one film to skip, wait for $0.99 cents day at your local video store.

The Grey Zone (2001)

"The Grey Zone" is all grey

[1/10 · 17 October 2002]

Worst film of 2002!! I saw this film at the Denver 2002 25th International film fest. What a waste of space. Poorly written and paoorly acted with enough in your face violence to show what little script or plot was there. A waste of $8.00.

The Ring (2002)

A silly Twin Peaks rip-off!

[1/10 · 16 October 2002]

Worst film of 2002!! Poorly written, poorly acted & poorly directed. Namoi Watts who showed promise as an actress in "Mulholland Drive" but she sure wasted her talents on this film. I heard the film cost a reported $60 million to make. I sure would like to know where the $60 million went? Surely noton the screen or its plot more for the markting of this film. Another film that shows how a company like "Dremworks" is just in the movie business to make a fast buck and not out make a truly great film. I saw this at an advance screening and boy what a waste of my time. The first 1/2 hour I was interseted in the story, & I was caught up in the mystery of the VHS tape that killed people who watched it, the last hour an 1/2 the film got boring, slow-moving and muddled; characters came and went and gave half assed answers and the characters seemed to spill over from the "Twin Peaks" Tv show, and the ending was the biggest scam since "The Blair Witch Project". Not scary more like the "The Changeling" gone high-tech. I very silly movie with enough plot holes to sink a huge ship & a film by then end that doesn't make sense and leaves more questions than answers. Thank god I saw this for free since I would been really made if I had wasted $8.00 to see this over hyped and under done film. Skip it & wait for $0.50 cents day at your local dollar theater, or better yet wait for $0.99 cents day at your local video store when your really bored. Another film that should be considered for the Rasebery Award for Worst film of 2002!

One Hour Photo (2002)

"One Hour Photo" is over blown!

[1/10 · 27 September 2002]

The worst film of 2002!! "One Hour Photo" tops my list of "Worst Films of 2002" right next to such duds as: "Signs", "The Four Feathers", "Star Wars 2", "The Panic Room & "Changing Lanes", "Blue Crush" as some of the most over hyped, most over blown sillest films of 2002! I would define this year as the year of B-movies! "One Hour Photo" is the mother of all the worst films to come out of the 2002 film line up so far. I mean "The Four Feathers" was really bad, but "One Hour Photo" was really really bad! "One Hour Photo" was 100% over hyped, over promoted and under done. "One Hour Photo" was poorly written, poorly directed, with enough Z grade to come from not only Mr. Williams in years, but the entire cast as well! The characters were wooden, almost cardboard, the dialouge was wooden and broken, the acting was fair & the ending was like leaving a can of pop open over night on the counter, flat and tasteless! I saw "One Hour Photo" the night it opened, and what a truely 100% waste of $8.00 to see. "One Hour Photo" is another fine example of how the Hollywood hype machine works in over drive to get there films noticed, and to sucker an unexpecting audeience into the film so it can make money. i think Hollywood knew that "One Hour Photo" was a bad film to begin with so that is why they over hyped it to the max! After seeing this film being promoted by Mr. Williams on every single talk show for over 7 months (& in most of Mr. Robins interviews he mad an ass out of himself anyways & he dosen't come off as an intelligent for that matter), a big fancy interview in EW magazine & being wowed at the 2002 Sundance Film Fest (Which I can't figure out why I guess the cold freezes people thinking?). I was expecting a really tight, edge of your seat thriller, what I got instead was a lazy, silly, tepid, PG-13 made for Lifetime Orginial movie film that would have played better on HBO. This film was the biggest scam since "The Blair Witch Project"! Next to "Insomina" this was Mr. Williams worst role this year! The Rasberry Award for worst film for 2002 should have a tie bettween: "One Hour Photo" & "The Four Feathers". But Mr. Williams should get the Raseberry Award for Wrost actor for both "Insomina" & "One Hour Photo"! Some silly, over-paid & very uneducated critic said: "One Hour Photo will do to snapshots what Psycho did for showers". What a crock!! This statement is the lowest, a truly tsteless thing to say about a classic film like "Psycho"! This critic and most directors in Hollywood today need to go bak to film school and learn how to make high quality films & not some cheap thriller knock-off! What I'm confused about is why "One Hour Photo" was rated "R" in th first place? Ther was no sex or violence in this film to give it an "R" rating unless it was another ploy by Hollywood to hype this film up! Thr trailer for "Red Dragon" was alot more scary than "One Hour Photo". During "One Hour Photo" half the audince laughed at most of the converstaions taking place on screen, or simply the other half of the audience just walked out before the end. The ending was a truly let down, almost a silly joke. The film ended very cold as well, it felt like the director was too scared to to take a risk and make "One Hour Photo" more daring and bold, or even more of a thriller. It seemed the director wanted to make more of a family film than anything else! Wait for $1.00 dollar theater, or better yet 0.99 cents rental day at your local video store. If "One Hour Photo" is even considered for Oscar gold then I know Hollywood is going to hell in a hand basket, & that most actors like Mr. Williams are in the film business for the money to pay there rent, & that they are not in the business of film to make high quality art! For making such a bad film Mr. Williams should lose some of his high salary and start from the bottom and work his way back up! I haven't seen one Hollywood film this year that even qualifes for any great reviews or even something that would show Oscar Gold, or even something that is worth seeing again!

Signs (2002)

The only "Signs" to look for are the exit signs!

[1/10 · 11 August 2002]

Worst film of 2002!! Poorly written, poorly acted and the most over rated, over bloated acting this side of a really bad Roger Corman film!! After seeing Mel pimp this film on every talk show, looking at nefty trailers and a nefty website I was trilled to see "Signs" on opening night! Boy I was 100% wrong! This film was bad! It was boring, it was laughable and the ending was the worst. There was not one mind blowing climax, no thrills or chills, just lots of Zzzzzzzzzzs and Z grade acting with Mel looking for another Oscar & Mr. Phoenix wasting his talents!!! M. Night Shmalyan is a 1 hit wonder director. "The Sixth Sense" was great, after that forget it even "Wide Awake" was bad! This man can't direct! Know wonder he is compared to Steven Spilberg, they both make over rated, over hyped films that add up to nothing but a big fat zero!. After spending 2 hrs in movie hell with "Signs", I saw "Full Frontal" the same night as well. "Full Frontal was alot better, & at least Steven Soderbergh has imagination and knows the definetion of diretor unlike some directors that need a PR person to find the answer in a book! The whole idea of "Wheres God?" mixed with strange shapes made out of corn, Mel acting like a fallen priest with no faith (I had no faith in this script so we were both doing good!) with close-ups of sweaty Mel sounding like he was having an orgasam with the end of the world theme running throuhgh it etc. was just to much to take with out laughing out loud or giggling at the fact that someone somewhere wrote this B-grade wanna-be cult film. This had the silliest plot since say "Plan 9 From Outerspace or even "ID4" for that matter"! "This film was "Field of Dreams" Meets "Close Encounters of the 3rd Kind"! No sense, no purpose just a film for actors to get paid lots of money to make a really crappy, dull and non-intelligent film, by a director that needs to take sometime off and find out what it means to make good quality film or at least attend 1 film class at a film school!! The Raseberry Award for worst film should go to "Signs" as well as the Rasberry award for Worst actor and worst dirctor! The only reson this film is #1 is that it was hyped to the max and poor movie goers like me were suckered into spending hard earned movie money to see a film that we thought was going to be scary, fun etc, all it turned out to be was cheap cartoon art. The only thing scary was the fact that Hollywood spent money making this film when the same production costs could have been making a better film with more imagination & story! Worst film of 2002!!!!

From Hell (2001)

Can't wait to visit Whitechapel again!

[10/10 · 20 October 2001]

Wow! Not predectiable or boring like some of the current films out there in moive land. This film is on my Best Films of 2001 list. To be frank one of the best films of the month of October 2001. I wish this film came out in the summer of 2001 to save us from such idot films like "Planet of the Apes" or Jurassic Park 3". Hats off to the Hughes Brothers for a a very thought provoking film. Orginial, thought provoking and what an excellent use of film technics. I loved the sets, art direction, the use of shadow & lights, primary colors and time lapse photography to heighten the tense situation. The score was great too, very dark and haunting, I can't wait to own the soundtrack. The Hughes brothers deserve an Oscar nod for Best dirctor, and Ian Holm desvers an Oscar nod for Best actor for his role. Great film. An instant cult classic. Great way the Hughes brothers mixed fact and fiction and put some new twists on the tale & legend of Jack the Ripper. I highly reccomed this film. A great film for discussion afterwards. For the strong and mature and very open minded. Can't wait too see it a 2nd time. Not to be missed, forget the rest and see "From Hell". Alot of great suprises along the way too.