Change Your Image
Greg-214
Reviews
Sleepy Hollow (1999)
Bad
No plot. Every fifteen minutes a character has some dialog that's plot exposition. Lots of people riding horses in the dark forest. Lots of women in period dresses that show off their chests. More horses, then more chests. Then, since there hasn't been any plot for the last fifteen minutes, some dialog with plot exposition that explains the plot that hasn't happened for the last fifteen minutes. Then more horses.
The first time the headless horseman swings his sword around in a flashy way it's pretty good. The fifteenth time it's boring.
Then at the end the plot, which exists only in the mind of the director and is never shared with the audience, kinda catches up with the movie, and that's when you can tell it's based on a book that must have been about something, because all the characters seem to be involved with a lot of things that weren't apparent during the first 95% of the film, but now come flooding out.
Dogma (1999)
Bad
The church shouldn't waste their time criticising this one. It's too stupid to pose a threat.
There are a few pointed barbs at the Catholic church. Big deal. It's just junk piled on junk. Stupid premise about angles wanting to get from earth back to heaven, but if they do the world will end. Even the devil doesn't want that.
Sloppy scenes piled together don't make a movie.
Waiting for Guffman (1996)
What a hoot!
The perfect video rental, this is a send up of a small town production of a play about their town. This film lampoons the way people can get carried away with self importance.
It's a fake documentary, so convincing that the first time I saw it I missed a lot of the jokes because I kept wanting to believe it, even though I knew it was a put on. This is the perfect movie to see twice, because there is so much to laugh at you'll miss some of it the first time around.
Double Jeopardy (1999)
Straight to the Lifetime Channel
McDonalds may not be your favorite place to eat, but if you're on a long road trip, hungry and there's no other place in sight, you might find yourself ordering Value Meal #1.
When people have a real need for something, other considerations get pushed aside. Audiences at Double Jeopardy won't mind the flaws if they are hungry for what this film offers -- a story about a woman determined to get her child back.
If this sounds to you like the typical fare served up on TV's "The Lifetime Channel -- Television for Women," you've got a pretty good idea of what this film is all about.
The setup involves a very well-to-do woman who goes sailing with her husband and wakes to find blood on her bathrobe. Her husband is nowhere to be found and in short order she is convicted of murdering him and pushing him overboard. We know she is innocent, but this is not a courtroom story. After the conviction she has her best friend take care of her son and they soon vanish. She spends the entire film looking for her son.
The point here is that we get to watch a woman struggle against the odds, by herself, to solve a relationship crisis. If you're a junkie for that kind of thing, bring your bowl of ice cream to the theater and enjoy yourself.
The rest of us will be scratching our heads, wondering why there are so many holes the story. The biggest goof happens when our hero discovers while in prison that her best friend and son have vanished. She learns of solid evidence that could get her out of prison in a hurry, but never calls anyone for help.
What gives? Doesn't this successful woman have family that can help, friends from school, anyone at all? She just needs one person to hire a private investigator for a day and poof, she'd be out of prison in a flash.
But noooo. We have to watch her struggle (against the odds, by herself). We have to watch her stay in prison for a couple of years, "getting ready." And on and on as she fights her battle (alone).
And that's the point. The film makers think we want very much to see her grapple with this terrible situation (which is caused, of course, by a man) and we apparently don't care much if the rest of the film makes much sense.
Get Bruce (1999)
Funny, inside look at comedy writing
The whole theater laughed at this one. A peek at a comedy writer most people have never heard of. People who are incredible snobs won't like it because, after all, this guy writes jokes for the Oscars and popular entertainers.
I happen to think Bette Middler is incredibly funny ... same for Robin Williams, etc. This guy works for these people and anyone who is not in the entertainment business will probably find it interesting to see how he does it, how he tailors his approach for each client, etc. But the payoff is the humor, watching the clips of his clients preparing material and doing it live.