TheCajunPhoenix Reviews

The Best of Roger Rabbit (1996 Video)

Wish we could see more Roger Rabbit

[9/10 · 4 June 2018]

I bought my DVD copy of "Who Framed Roger Rabbit?"'s Vista Series Edition and the cartoon shorts are included.

I wish we could all see more Roger Rabbit cartoons and especially the sequel to the movie.

Troy (2004)

Troy is Worth a Watch in Spite of Flaws

[8/10 · 29 September 2007]

'Troy''s best parts revolve around the showdown between the pragmatic Hector (Eric Bana) and the conflicted Achilles (Brad Pitt). Then they first meet, you can all but feel the adrenaline rush between them. The deal is, Orlando Bloom doesn't quite bring his portrayal of Paris to the level it deserves to be. Something is wrong if you can't take your eyes off the nipples of one of your main characters, as is shown when Paris and Helen (Diane Kruger) share their last night before Helen goes to Troy with Paris. Andromache (Saffron Burrows) is only featured in a handful of scenes but demonstrates quiet courage during the siege of Troy. Aeneas(Frankie Fitgerald) doesn't really belong here. Achilles trusts three people on his quest for immortality--Patroclus (the cute-as-a-button Garrett Hedlund), Myrmidon veteran Eudorus (the intense Vincent Regan), and Ithaca's King Odysseus(the charismatic Sean Bean). What sucks is Menalaus (Brendan Gleeson of 'Braveheart' fame) never really gets his revenge on Paris after their swordfight leads to Paris getting his butt kicked. Brian Cox's Agamemnon is hell-bent on completing his empire by conquest and consolidation of his rivals, but he's not a clearcut antagonist. I hink he hits the ideal mix of raw power and the will to win. Peter O'Toole is touching as the somewhat trusting King Priam, and his interactions are amazing. It's heart-wrenching to watch Priam's interaction with his sons and when he reunites with the captive Briseis(the feisty Rose Byrne)after facing down Achilles. I like Achilles's interactions with Odysseus the best because Odysseus is one of the few people who defends Achilles's best traits after Agamemnon decides he likes Briseis as well. He functions as a confidante who guides Achilles away from the edge of the proverbial cliff. Whereas Achilles is a fighting machine, Odysseus might be the original 'Cerebral Assassin.' The toy wooden animals are a mirror bookend--Hector's wooden lion and a Greek soldier's wooden horse--for the fate of Troy after the swordfight between Achilles and Hector out of vengeance for Patroclus's fate. Garrett Hedlund is literally a babyface who has no business picking up a spear and shield Brad Pitt and Orlando Bloom weren't the best picks for Achilles and Paris aside from their sensual appeal. Achilles's liaison with Briseis does only a minimum of storyline advancement, and Paris comes across as a nervous 16-year-old kid on his first date. Does 'Troy' deserve its own sequel? I think it does, and it would be amazing to see Sean Bean's Odysseus in the sequel--nobody else should be considered for this multi-talented Ithacan monarch!

Pride (2004 TV Movie)

'Pride' Deserves to Be Watched and Owned

[8/10 · 27 August 2006]

I think 'Pride' should be part of everyone' DVD collections because the interaction between the cocky Suki (Kate Winslet), her less adventurous brother Linus (Rupert Graves), and the orphaned Fleck (Martin Freeman) when they fight over who gets nursed by Macheeba (Helen Mirren) first is hilarious. Not so hilarious is the disapproval over Suki's infatuation with Dark (Sean Bean), the patriarch of the scrublands pride, as Dark and Harry (John Hurt) think they can take what James (Robbie Coltrane) and Eddie (Jim Broadbent) want to keep. I like that Dark is not completely cold-hearted, as he admits that Harry is a hell of a hunting partner. The deal is, Dark ends up with all the scrublands lionesses, not Harry, and he also literally makes every scene he's in his own. Suki's tantrum before she elopes with Dark minor spoiler) underscores that she has to experience life on her own to fully appreciate her family. Fleck came across as a big sissy, though, which makes Linus look more macho. Lush (Kwame Kwei-Armah) didn't really seem to fit in so easily, and Kwei-Armah's voice delivery sounded last-minute as well. Big one-ups to the older actors for some amazing screen chemistry.

The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (2002)

"'The Two Towers' is an Edgy Must-See!"

[14 February 2003]

'The Two Towers' is edgier than 'FOTR' and the highlight is Aragorn's romantic relationship with Arwen. Arwen's decision to stay with Aragorn doesn't stop Elrond (Hugo Weaving mixes paternal protectiveness and vulnerability.) from worrying that she is making the wrong choice. Andy Serkis is a perfect portrait of Gollum's pathos and insanity. I never would have tried to pinch the playfully intense Boromir's face (watch 'FOTR' because Sean Bean should definitely be tamed and seduced like the buck-wild little seducer he is when he's not too saucy!), but his kid brother Faramir (David Wenham reminds me of a puppy that hasn't been housebroken!)is another story because he reminds me of a puppy. Christopher Lee and Ian McKellan are the best as Saruman and Gandalf respectively, especially since the creepy Wormtongue (Brad Dourif is equally creppy and spooky.). I'm buying the special edition because Peter Jackson knows his material.

Scarlett (1994)

"It's Not Supposed to Replace the Original GWTW--Get Over It!"

[11 December 2002]

I have leafed through enough derogatory comments on this miniseries that I will scream if I don't respond. As for the comparisons of Joanne Whalley (now minus the 'Kilmer') to Vivian Leigh and of Timothy Dalton to Clark Gable, "Scarlett" is not meant to replace the original "GWTW" any more than these two lead stars are meant to replace Clark and Gable! "Scarlett" is meant to be a good time, even if it isn't a classic. I like Mr. Dalton's roguish, believably disarming portrayal of Rhett Butler because he also makes his Rhett capable of feeling for other people, such as Anne. Only one word sums up Mr. Dalton: STUD! Ms. Whalley makes a charming if somewhat flawed Scarlett as her sororal relationship with cousin Colum O'Hara (Colm Meaney) reveals. Sean Bean's portrayal of Lord Fenton stands out the most for me because his Fenton is simultaneously a charming hottie (yes, Mr. Bean is just that--a hottie though he is a hottie who is also a father) and an unbelievably cruel racist, as the mistreated Mary Boyle (Tina Kellegher) finds out to her cost when he rejects her and their ill-fated unborn child. Scarlett soon wises up and tries to break up with him, only to find out Lord Fenton will not accept "No!" or "You're a loser!" or "This one-night-stand is over!" for an answer though he sure doesn't mind snarling those phrases out! "Scarlett" is certainly not meant for the easily squeamish. All I am going to say about the naysayers who don't think "Scarlett" deserves to be mentioned in the same breath as "GWTW" is this: Get over it and either enjoy its odd twists and turns or let the fans enjoy this miniseries without speaking in the fans' ears!

Shanghai Noon (2000)

"'Shanghai Noon' is Not Perfect, but It's Still Worth Watching"

[29 May 2002]

"Shanghai Noon" is not a full-on classic, but it doesn't deserve a lot of the negative comments I leafed through. Jackie Chan (the bumbling but heartstrong Chon Wang) and Owen Wilson (Roy O'Bannon) make an unlikely but effective team because they add naivete and determination to the two misfits. Lucy Liu shows exceptional spunk as the fiesty Princess Pei-Pei, and she holds up against Lo Fong (Roger Yuan adds a laid-back but icy edge to the renegade Imperial Guard). The hyperactive Chon Wang's marriage to a Native American princess, though, could have been edited out of the movie because it is not essential to the movie's storyline. The corrupt sheriff Nathan Van Cleef (portrayed by Xander Berkeley) could have been fleshed out a little more because he resembles a sketch of the stock corrupt public official. It's not perfect for movie buffs, but it is acceptable for a slow Saturday morning when there are marathons of college football games.

Freddy Got Fingered (2001)

"'Freddy Got Fingered' Is A Mess"

[8 May 2002]

"Freddy Got Fingered" is among the least watchable movies ever produced. While I like how Tom Green has his Gord Brody stand up to his domineering dad Jim (played by the wacky Rip Torn), his lack of directorial experience and his meager on-screen experience is not enough to sustain this comedy. The use of dead deer was completely unnecessary and did NOTHING to spur the plot along. Also, the vulgar Jim's destroying Gord's cartoon drawings was enough for me to beg Gord to punch that guy in the mouth with a pair of brass knuckles on both fists. Marisa Coughlan's Betty is gutsy for pursuing her goal as a paraplegic rocket scientist, but from a physiological standpoint a paraplegic has no sensations from the waist down. Therefore, her "love" scenes with Gord border on the ridiculous. The title itself might have been better called "The Brody Family is a Mess" since Freddy is not the lead character and the movie doesn't revolve aroung the young businessman's antics. Nevertheless, the film's message warns against picking on relatively late blossomers like Gord, and Jim should have left his son's drawings alone.

Romeo Must Die (2000)

RMD's Main Cast Members Seem A Little Breathless

[30 April 2002]

After leafing through all the RMD reviews I felt driven to respond. I saw it twice in the multiplexes and have it on tape. The plot of RMD is too fast-paced to please the intellectual film fanatics, but perfection doesn't matter because RMD is all about a good time. As for Ch'u Sing's casual comment that Roth is a little antsy, I say that Big Poppa Sing (he is sexier than either of his two sons and his enforcer has nothin' on him!) is more than a little breathless and Isaac O'Day is in over his head. As for Jet Li's Han Sing, he should have had more time to improve his game with the lovely Trish O'Day and give a gift to Isaac. Li possesses that adolescent charm and leaves me with the impression that he has a lot more life experience to taste and feel besides the opening scene. If the editing seems a little clipped, that's because this is really fast-paced. Xi Reng Jiang (sue me! I like his original name because it's more becoming to him) gives his portrayal of Mr. Sing this unique Southern drawl and this laid-back stroll so the audience forgets for a moment that he's not U.S.-born. I am blown away because he makes sure the audience never misses a beat. I am throwing his name into the hat as a dark horse sensuality demigod because of this reason alone. Also, Mr. Jiang's being bilingual is an asset for the lithe cat man. Delroy Lindo adds brusqueness and daddy wolf protectiveness to his Isaac O'Day. Watch RMD for a boys' night out and have a nice ride.

The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (2001)

"FOTR" Is Definitely Worth Seeing

[1 March 2002]

I'm very lucky I got to see "Fellowship of the Ring" because it is a definite must-see. Elijah Wood gives Frodo Baggins a unique combination of naivete and idealism (naivity because he doesn't realize the Ring his uncle Bilbo left to him isn't merely dangerous but corrosive and potentially lethal and idealism because he carries a can-do mentality). I could not stop laughing when Merry (Dominic Monaghan) and Pippin

(Billy Boyd) almost made a complete mess of the Shire with a heavy firework display. I wasn't as interested in the sequences where Frodo uses the Ring to disappear because it felt like a jump cut that doesn't give the viewer enough time to see what just happened. Cate Blanchett's portrayal of Galadriel was at once etherial and mystical. I definitely recommend this movie.

Depeche Mode: 101 (1989)

'a definite must-see'

[21 January 2000]

I've watched my copy of 'Depeche Mode 101' so many times I've had to replace my videotape at least twice. All of the band members look their rip-rocking best, but if any of the members could give David Gahan a sizable competition for 'Best-Looking Musician In A Band,' that title would have to go to their former keyboardist Alan Wilder since he's the most striking mixture of rock-and-roll decadence and postmodern beauty I've ever seen on screen and in concert. Incidentally, I've seen Depeche Mode in concert three times and I still try to outvoice their lead singer! I wouldn't hesitate to recommend '101' or any of their other concert videos. And one more thing: check out how sexy Alan looks in that leather bomber jacket and jeans and put him side by side with David and see which one you think looks the better in your opinion. And as for the tour bus double-bed scene, that is one of the funniest outtakes of the movie.