SwalesFilm Reviews

Luther: The Fallen Sun (2023)

More realism in Star Wars

[1/10 · 17 March 2023]

Ex cop would be put in a segregated jail with similar prisoners. Just like at HMP Parc. Let alone be jailed so quick. At least 18 months must have passed for trial and conviction. So far fetched is this, you will see more realism in Star Wars. Visitors are not allowed unless invited by prisoner on form. The people in the house didn't panic when there was a fire. I couldn't take any more of this. Not a good film at all. Really really bad. No more words.

Ex cop would be put in a segregated jail with similar prisoners. Just like at HMP Parc. Let alone be jailed so quick. At least 18 months must have passed for trial and conviction. So far fetched is this, you will see more realism in Star Wars. Visitors are not allowed unless invited by prisoner on form. The people in the house didn't panic when there was a fire. I couldn't take any more of this. Not a good film at all. Really really bad. No more words.

Fight Club (1999)

Absolutely Trash

[1/10 · 5 January 2023]

I don't get the appeal with this nonsense film. It has no story. It is like watching paint dry. I like David Fincher's other films. I hate this. I struggled to finish it. Really stupid characters nobody can relate to and they talk like they need help. How is that entertainment? It is very depressing. So what and why the high score?

Nothing else to say. I don't read or write long reviews. I like to keep things short and to the point. Maybe I should write in my shopping list here. I like to eat blueberries, mushrooms and leaks almost daily. I like my chicken and fish too. Beetroot juice and coconut water.

Bait (I) (2019)

If it was made with a DSLR

[1/10 · 7 December 2022]

Would people be talking about this if it was made with a DSLR? That says a lot because there is no story here. No resolution of anything set up. Just arty and experimental. I am baffled as to how it won award and praise. Just because it was 16mm film? Yes, I like the look of 16mm and had one of these cameras myself. I couldn't afford to shoot film. But if I could I would have made sure I had written a script for it. Just think of the awards it could have won then. A film needs to be more than just how it looks and the statement it makes. This film has some drama, but is difficult to make sense of because of how experimental it is with having to conserve film.

Andor (2022– )

Boring. Nothing happens.

[1/10 · 7 December 2022]

Doesn't feel like Star Wars. It's like watching paint dry. Cosplay British actors in moody setting talking for a long time, but with no story and little action. How is that entertainment? Wasted. I couldn't care for any of the characters. It would have been cool to see some stormtroopers slaughter people, but nothing eventful ever happens. Lead actor mumbles and has no screen charisma.

What else can I write...what about ideas for new Star Wars series? I think Andor should have featured different adventures per episode like TV in the old days. Maybe change Andor for a completely new character.

The Watcher (2022– )

Should have been 12 episodes

[4/10 · 24 October 2022]

It feels like they suddenly had to wrap the production at 7 and ignore all the loose ends. There were plenty of plot holes throughout, but was still very enjoyable and had a good hook. So halfway through episode 7 I felt much disappointed as I could see it was not going to be a satisfying ending.

Really don't know why we have to write so many words for these reviews. Do you like reading long essays on here? I am unsure what else to say. I loved the lighting and the performances. But the story has problems finding its 3rd act, the toughest part of screenwriting. Maybe they needed to find another writer to hand it to for a final draft.

Keep Breathing (2022)

Started off interesting

[1/10 · 1 August 2022]

I ended up fast forwarding through Boring pointless flashbacks man. Can't stand flashbacks. Good cinematography and actress. Very disappointing. Could have been really good with more development.

Into the Wild (2007)

Extreme Boredom

[1/10 · 22 May 2022]

Waste of time. I regret my decision to watch half of this. Skipped to the end. Depressing and pointless. What else can I say to fill this space? IMDB wants me to write more words. A book or something.

Dune (2021)

I like the director's other work

[1/10 · 25 October 2021]

Not this. I suspected as much from the trailer. Sitting through this film and trying to understand the story felt like work and a movie shouldn't be like that. It should be extremely engaging and entertaining. The hours should feel like a few minutes of enjoyment. It was boring and the score was way too loud. I have all the director's other films on the shelf, but won't be buying this bluray nor will i see the sequel.

Sabrina (1995)

One of Harrison's best

[10/10 · 7 August 2021]

Up there with Star Wars, Indy, Fugitive, Patriot Games, and Witness. Love it. Fantastic film.

Colin (2008)

Not entertaining

[1/10 · 28 June 2021]

About as interesting as watching paint dry. Shame they didn't write a script before finding people to participate in front of camera.

War of the Worlds (2019– )

I thought it had promise

[2/10 · 22 June 2021]

By episode 5 we should have moved from robot dogs and be seeing scary aliens chasing some characters we care about. But it is slooooow and characters are boring, i want the aliens to kill them all. I really do. So this story needs more thought.

Rocketman (I) (2019)

30 minutes

[1/10 · 4 May 2021]

I thought i should give it at least 30 minutes due to the reviews and score here. I was eager for those 30 minutes to be up. Very Bollywood. Big disappointment. Expected much better.

Blinded by the Light (2019)

Big Springsteen fan but..

[5/10 · 2 April 2021]

This was so very cringe and I wanted it to end. How did it get funding? Not a good film.

The Meg (2018)

Tried twice

[1/10 · 26 February 2021]

Could not hold my interest, i turned it off again just now and had to read the reviews. See trailer, that is enough.

The Vanished (2020)

Good, then bad ending

[6/10 · 1 February 2021]

I don't buy the ending. Have it end differently. Any way but that please.

Dawson's Creek (1998–2003)

Beautiful

[6/10 · 15 January 2021]

Beautifully written, photographed, acted, scored, directed, etc. But i think story should have started when they were end of high school and not half way through it. I pretended that was such during first season. Some of the 15 year olds look like they were played by adults in their thirties.

The Midnight Sky (2020)

Never seen Clooney in a good film

[1/10 · 24 December 2020]

Except for GRAVITY, I've never seen him in a good film. I've always been confused by the appeal. Direct he most certainly cannot. This film made me fall asleep. So boring.

Industry (2020– )

Absolutely awful and boring

[1/10 · 10 November 2020]

Why does BBC invest in stuff like this? Unlikeable characters for us not to care and a very weak storyline does not make for compelling viewing, i doubt i will continue watching.

Tenet (2020)

Don't forget your ear defenders

[2/10 · 1 September 2020]

The movie is the loudest i have ever experienced. Absolutely deafening gun fire and music. Then I could barely hear or understand the dialogue, which went so fast it was difficult to process the information overload to try and make sense of what we had just seen. It got to the point where i gave ip caring. The lead actor was out of his depth. Jake Gylenhall would have been a better choice. The film was very disappointing indeed.

Eurovision Song Contest: The Story of Fire Saga (2020)

I think i am cancelling Netflix

[1/10 · 26 June 2020]

The good films I have on disc. Why isn't Netflix investing in decent quality original content? Rubbish like this makes me want to cancel subscription.

Interview with the Vampire: The Vampire Chronicles (1994)

Too boring.

[1/10 · 14 June 2020]

I remember it bored me in 1994 and decided to see it again only tonight. It's more boring than i remembered. Not much story for a Hollywood film.

Westworld (2016–2022)

I can't care for machines

[1/10 · 9 June 2020]

3 Episodes in and getting bored. I was expecting so much more than this.

Tomorrowland (2015)

Couldn't make Sense of it.

[1/10 · 29 April 2020]

I managed to get through one hour and then didn't care to continue trying to understand it. I see it's by the writer who messed up LOST. Say no more.

The Invisible Man (I) (2020)

Very impressed

[10/10 · 3 March 2020]

Excellent thriller from start to finish. Unsure I bought the ending fully, though. For her to be able to pull that off.

Richard Jewell (2019)

confused by empty tbeatre

[9/10 · 5 February 2020]

Limited screenings in UK it seems. It wasn't showing in Cwmbran so had to drive further. Empty theatre but i thought the film was outstanding and every bit as good as 1917 if not better.