draketigerclaw Reviews

Hypersonic (2002 Video)

Um.... What?

[1/10 · 2 August 2010]

This movie is terrible, but it's so terrible that in some ways it's funny. The movie is very low budget and no one did their homework so if you have ever vaguely met anyone in the air force or if you are a pilot there will be some funny stuff to laugh at. I can't decide though if it's funny or embarrassing when they try to talk shop aviation, it's painful and they try to do it through the whole movie. I also love how there are these Air Force characters that show up a few times and they are all wearing the same Halloween Senior Airman uniform. I rolled over laughing when one of them says "Hello Major!" Anyway this movie makes no sense. Wardrobe makes no sense, dialog makes no sense, the technical stuff makes no sense. Oh and for some reason the CG guy had a thing for the Eurofighter Typhoon because it plays all of the planes. The end which I'm not going to elaborate on makes no sense, you should watch it just to experience the feeling of a writer stepping on the logic center of your brain for a few minutes.

So in short if you want to waste some time there are better bad aviation movies, go watch one of the ones with dinosaurs.

Dinotopia: Quest for the Ruby Sunstone (2005)

"We want to be moronic gods!"

[3/10 · 4 August 2008]

I'm going to be brutally honest about this movie. It's mislabeled. I'll explain that in a moment. Suffice it to say that if you are older than 10 this movie will either cause you an emotion of rage or bore you to tears.

Generally when you make a children's movie out of a popular series the intent is usually to bring young people into a fantasy world in a safe environment. Apparently they missed that idea because it doesn't bring you into anything. It makes a lot of references to the TV mini series and they traced a few of the backgrounds out of the original book but mostly they ignore all of the important plot devices from the series and replace them with Saturday morning cartoon plot devices. It may as well have been called "Kids in Dinoland", because the ideas surrounding Dinotopia are just not there, which is why it is mislabeled.

Moving on to the technical side of the movie, it is not terrible but it is by no means great. The character animation is surprisingly smooth for a goofy straight to video movie. The backgrounds look alright most of the time, and the animation is mostly consistent. It mostly looks like a Saturday morning cartoon though.

The story is baked terrible with a side of fried stupid. It's chock full of clichés and stupid jokes from 90's pop culture. There are really vague references and allusions to plot points from the mini series and books but they never go into any of them. Dinotopian culture is not explained at all, which would be alright if it were not about someone being introduced to Dinotopian culture.

Now for some nit picking. The characters are mostly forgettable and bland, except for the bad guys and 26. There were even a few attempts at musical numbers that were bizarre. The sun stones and what they supposedly do made even less sense than they did in the mini-series. I seriously thought we had gotten over idiotic skateboarding in the 90's. Oh yeah and the ending leads me to believe they made this as a pilot for another TV series that just didn't happen.

To wrap up, as a fan of animation, movies, sci-fi, and other nonsense I refuse to call something that is bad good. People use the fact that this is a children's movie to defend it's problems, but as it is based on a series I give it no quarter because when it's based on a series for everybody it should not exclude the majority of it's fans or people who may be interested. So while I'm not prepared to call it horrible because it is by no means the worst thing I have ever seen, it just isn't good. If you are a fan or passerby who may be interested (like me) this movie is not worth your time. If you need to distract a 5 year old for an hour than this may be for you.

The Lion King II: Simba's Pride (1998 Video)

A Darker Film

[9/10 · 28 December 2007]

Not bad for a straight to video animated sequel. An impressive point is that they got all the primary voice actors back. The animation quality is quite good considering that it is a straight to video throwaway sequel. However I found the color difference between this film and the original a bit distracting. This film is also noticeable darker all around, not only in the colors but also in the plot. At times the plot is so pitch black I wonder if this movie was for kids or for the kids who had seen the original and grown up a little. Even the lyrics of the songs hang a little heavier in the air. But the song sequences they are actually memorable unlike most found in sequel movies. Where the first film was Hamlet with lions this film was Romeo and Juliet with lions and a happier ending. Overall this movie wasn't bad and it had its moments but it was defiantly not the definitive work of the trilogy.

The Lion King 1½ (2004 Video)

Frivolity for All

[8/10 · 28 December 2007]

Surprisingly not terrible and well animated for one of Disney's straight to video throw away sequels. Like the previous sequel (The Lion King 2) I was glad that Disney brought back most of the original voice actors which makes a big difference and they kept a good level of traditional animation. The plot wanders around for a while but we are distracted by an unending string of jokes ranging from hilarious to dull. To break up the detached plot and jokes they gave us some silly musical sequences, which much like the jokes, range from entertaining to a quick trip to the fridge. For the most part the MST3K-like moments are bland and full of untapped potential and really don't add a whole lot to the movie other than to act as a vehicle for an hour-long flashback. The new characters are at least likable, and the old characters are out doing their thing so I can't fault them there. Overall this movie in not bad and it makes for a nice frivolous filler between the more serious Lion King titles.

Duck Dodgers (2003–2005)

Mixed feelings

[15 April 2006]

Well as with so many of the recycled cartoons out there I have mixed feelings about duck dodgers. The show had a lot of potential because its silly sci-fi and you can do anything with it. But then again as usual they tried to throw in a bunch or lame jokes and clichés. There are also a number of vague references to other shows and movies, which go over a lot of people's heads. The animation is a bit above the typical for a modern series and in an unusual twist the CG work does not look totally out of place.

Over all I liked the series (Aside: and the Martian Queen) but it could have been made better in a few ways.