me43 Reviews

Great Performances: Jesus Christ Superstar (2000) Season 29, Episode 11

Awful!

[1/10 · 29 July 2006]

This version of Jesus Christ Superstar illustrates two truths about casting for the silver screen:

First, stage actors don't necessarily translate well to film.

Secondly, the same material in different hands can either make or break a production.

Carter's Jesus has no charms whatsoever. He is whiny and petulant, angry and defiant, and chews up the (scant) scenery at a mile a minute.

Carter looks like a robust Lt. Dan, sans beard, and has more than a hint of confusion about him. Ted Neeley's Jesus oozed compassion and understanding, for both Mary and Judas, but this version lacks compassion for anyone. Jesus, in fact, comes across as self pitying, and arrogant.

Judas seems to be a frustrated homosexual in lust with the man himself, and the gestapo Jews are just bizarre.

I could go on and on, but why waste any more precious moments on this very bad production of a beloved classic?

Cold Case: 8 Years (2006) Season 3, Episode 11

Good music, "Brad" all grown up, but otherwise some issues

[5/10 · 13 July 2006]

A so-so episode which features Bruce Springsteen songs. The vintage portion is from 1981 and other early 80's dates.

Incomprehensibly "May" (played by Shelly Cole) appears to have green-brown eyes, and the actress playing "her" in 2006 has very light blue eyes. It spoils the illusion and one wonders if the producers couldn't have sprung for some colored contact lenses for the elder actress.

This episode also features Zachery Ty Bryan (Brad Taylor from "Home Improvement".) He is all grown up and proves he can act. David Parker, who plays Zachery's character "Petey" in the current era, looks nothing like him.

Watch the episode for Zach's performance & Springsteen's songs, but otherwise, it's a miss.

The Sister in Law (1974)

A curiosity, and semi-interesting for fans of John Savage

[5/10 · 11 July 2006]

If you find this rare film on video, do yourself a favor and don't read the blurb on the back of the box. For some reason they give away the entire plot - including the ending! (It is called a "Suspense/Thriller" in the fine print. Giving away the ending ruins what little "suspense" it has. Drama is a better description for it.)

While there isn't an Amazon listing for the film; (it is long out-of-print on video), original copies can often be found on ebay, at a reasonable price.

"The Sister In Law" is notable for a very youthful John Savage sporting long hair and full beard, but don't expect the title to have much of anything to do with the plot.

Savage also wrote the music for the film, and performed 3 of his own songs. Savage's voice and style of composition would be more classified as "easy-listening with vocals" than any other style of music.

The film has a very early 70's feel; (not surprising as it was made in 1974)- but one wonders if we were ever this naive? Granted, '74 was an entirely different era, but even then, one would think twice about messing with the bad guys in that situation.

The acting of the ladies in the film consists mostly of disrobing, with some false-voiced sentences thrown in.

All in all it is Savage's film - non-fans won't find much here to interest them.

Primetime (1989–2012)

Did a little good for a few Veterans, but...

[15 October 2004]

Veterans returning from the war, maimed, have been getting a raw deal from the Pentagon, until Primetime Live brought the stories of a few soldiers to their attention. The Pentagon then decided to help these 3 or 4 guys BECAUSE of the spotlight, but what about the rest? What about all the head injury cases, the THI cases without obvious wounds?

What about the Veterans of the Gulf War? What about the the Veterans of the nameless mini-wars? How about the Veterans of Vietnam? Even the promises made to the Veterans of Korea and WWII have been broken.

If our Soldiers (and I stand behind our soldiers 150%) were aware of the US Government's lousy track-record of taking care of our permanently injured Vets., prior to enlistment, maybe they would think twice about signing-up to fight for our Country.

Anyone who has spent even 20 minutes in the average VA hospital, (not talking about the state-of-the-art military hospitals for active duty soldiers) has been assaulted with sounds, sights and smells so repellent that incredible anger or sadness wells up.

They don't provide the vets with even the most basic of necessities... SOAP, TOOTHBRUSHES, COMBS, TOOTHPASTE... and DO NOT EVEN try to tell me they do, because I have been in these facilities, in several states, as a chairperson/and or member of Patriotic committees which round up and deliver these little items, (in more than one state,) and have spent a lot of time with government forsaken Veterans, holding their hands, lending an ear, and handing out these little presents. I'm not just talking about wizened old Vets., but young ones, younger than myself, whose only wish is death, anything to escape the (unmanaged) pain. What really kills me is how NONE OF THEM lambaste the government whose lack of caring dumped them there, to be warehoused, as cheaply as possible, until death.

Sure the system is over-burdened, and more are being added to it everyday, but the government must step up to help more than a few Veterans, that had the spotlight shone on them.

Clubhouse (2004–2005)

Faltering

[13 October 2004]

I've checked out this show, because of Dean Cain being in it, and must say it is losing my interest rapidly. What are the producers thinking when they allow minors to drink beer on Stadium property? Alcohol seems to be featured in every episode... "nay, madam, I know not 'seems'" to quote the Executive Producer, Mel Gibson, in one of his earlier roles. (Hamlet) In other words, the illegal use of alcohol is featured in EVERY show so far! Not only is it redundant, it is offensive. Last I checked, Gibson was into a family mentality these days. He's missing the boat here.

I had hopes from the pilot, due to it's "do the right thing" slant, but it has rapidly gone downhill from there.

Watching two inept minors kiss was laughable at best, and disconcerting at worst. There is no real chemistry betwixt the two, and I kept wondering how we went from a gleeful 'thimble' in PP, to this non-chemistry laughability. The line about him being a good kisser was a riot. And is it just me, or is Sumpter looking different in each show?

The continuity gal ought to be fired, as every show so far has had glaring mistakes. The pilot had "Conrad Dean's" poster signed with "Dean Cain's" normal signature, any Little Leaguer; but most definitely any guy from the Minors would be wise to the old "bat-stretcher" and "batters box key" gags by the time they made it to the Majors.

Being dumb enough to pull out a bag of steroids and syringes when one is only looking for a bit of paper, makes me wonder what the kid's IQ is.

In the second episode, there was that dreadful National Anthem mangling; the forgotten bit of bling in the form of the gold-chained "CT ice pendant" (brought back in episode 3, but doing a show, then no-show routine with maddening regularity,) and the whole Pete stealing the bat and sinking it in the water deal. OK, so now we know Pete is dishonest, a liar, and eager to start drinking like his slutty big sister.

Clubhouse is rapidly becoming a show to miss.

All the Pretty Horses (2000)

Poor horseflesh, even poorer movie

[8 January 2004]

Most of this film hinges on the quality of the horseflesh in it, and sadly, no one on this film had the slightest clew what prime horseflesh looks like! Even a well brushed old nag would have been more believable than the creature they used.

The actors were not very adept riders and Damon's accent was terrible! All of this blew the film's credibility at a profound level.

I simply cannot recommend this clunker at all.

Cowboy Up (2001)

Molly needs to leave Shermer Ill. behind...

[29 December 2003]

I would think with all the talent on this film that has actual horseback experience, that SOMEONE would get Kiefer, et al. to quit holding their reins at chest level! Kiefer should know better by now! I kept expecting him to clock himself in the chin when he was working his mount. (At least they placed their hats brim up when they set 'em down, which was a big gaffe in "8 Seconds".)

I wish Molly luck with her career, but someone has got to be kind and tell her that hairdo does nothing for her thickened neck and it's severity ages her. (I hate to say it but between her and Daryl, I got to wondering if ol' Eli had some Oedipus issues to work out.... BTW: "Ely" is like Ely Mae, not as it was pronounced in the film.) For some reason Molly's wardrobe hasn't changed since the 80's either. She just might get more roles if she would shed the "Shermer Ill." image, as her acting has improved over the years.

I could not get behind Marcus Thomas either. He had a strange feel to him that I couldn't quite put my finger on until I discovered his country of origin. Then it made sense. (I spent a good spit of time in Belgium.) He is also a bit too thick legged to make him believable as a bullrider... and his low forehead is a poor match for those playing his kinfolk.

Great to see Melinda Dillon again, and Bo Hopkins was a notch above nearly everyone else in the film. Pete Postlethwaite has got to be the most manic Englishman doing a westerner I've ever seen! It's scary!

Russell Means was wasted... in that anyone could have done his part. It would have been a nice touch if he came across as some sort of "wise surrogate father" for Kiefer's character, as he seemed to have always lacked a father figure in his life.

All in all, though, "Cowboy Up" lacks direction and has an almost film-student feel to it. Watch it for the bullriding action if that is your cup of tea, but forget about the other Rodeo aspects of it, because it is obvious these folks never rode the circuit.

The Matrix Reloaded (2003)

MR takes itself too seriously to be fun.

[12 December 2003]

"The Matrix Reloaded" took itself entirely too seriously to be fun.

When Neo did "his superman thing", and derived no joy from it, I knew this film was going to collapse under its own weight. He should have flown up, hollered something ecstatic and then whooped on his way. Instead he acts as if flying is one more gritty chore he must endure.

Then there is the attitude toward women. Link enters his abode hollering "Where's my pussy"? and he is talking about his wife?! In most households I know of, Mr. Link would have been relegated to the doghouse until he learned some manners. Then the way that capt. says "Niobe" as she talks to her former flame, Morpheus. It is in such a way that he is demanding she come to him... and she does! Are they telling us that in this hardscrabble future, where women risk their lives just as much as men, that the men are really only chauvinistic pigs?

Well, no. White women fare better in the film, so I must conclude they are catering to prevailing stereotypes. (In this alternate universe there should be no notion of prejudice as a battery is a battery is a battery, regardless of outer casing.) Why does it always seem I'm the only reviewer who ever speaks up against violence toward women, nasty stereotypes and inappropriate behavior (in so-called children's films) that Hollywood keeps feeding us?

The dialogue is ponderous; the love scene between Neo and Trinity fell surprisingly flat (no chemistry whatsoever!), and Morpheus' speech was too pompous for all the dancing that followed.

The first Matrix film stood on its own two feet. This one can't because they gave it no "mini-ending" to tide one over until the next film came along. The desire to milk more money from the viewing public (or to copy the Lord Of The Rings in its epic three picture deal, which is more believable when one realizes Hugo Weaving was in both trilogies.) is too obvious for taste.

Will I see #3? I will, but not in the high dollar theatre... or even in the expensive "one night rental" for new releases. No, I'll wait, just like I did for this one, until it goes into the bargain rental bin.

Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl (2003)

Fun on first viewing, logic dulls the fun on the second.

[6 December 2003]

"Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl" is weird and wonderful; funny and droll, but cannot stand up over repeated viewings.

(Well, it can, if you check your brain at the door before taking your seat.)

I mean, come on now! Six, count 'em, six writers, and hundreds of workers on the film and NO ONE pointed out that the main plot falls under the film's own rules? Should we not expect more from Disney and Bruckheimer? Oh. I forgot. Disney is adept at making lies into "popular fact"... such as their enduring lie that lemmings commit mass suicide (they pushed the little fellers off the cliff to their doom!) and teaches moms are expendable, a subtle misogyny, and more, to little kids in their animated films. (Not so subtle is the showing of a woman being hit by men... twice! Once by a large black man, enforcing nasty stereotypes, and then by the pirate captain.) Then there is Jerry Bruckheimer, well, his career has been uneven, at best. From "Con Air" and "Top Gun" to "Kangaroo Jack" and lots of television stuff, so perhaps we should expect non-thinking films from him.

So, don't examine the premise closely or it will unravel like an old knit sweater.

Before you holler about it being a kid movie, realize PG-13 is NOT a "kid movie" and Capt. Sparrows obsession with eunuchs (also see deleted scenes) is certainly NOT appropriate for the minds of 13 year old males, (who are embarking on a critical stage of sexual development with its attendant castration fears) let alone younger children. With the DVD release coinciding with the Yule season, a lot of youngsters will be getting this film, which is exactly as the marketers intended. Besides, 13 year olds are bright enough to question the film's violations of its own internal logic... even little kids are adept at pointing out movie inconsistencies these days. Taking it too seriously, you say? Well, watch the extras on the DVD, the makers took this film seriously, and obviously intended we would also.

**** *** ** Warning! Logic Ahead! ** *** ****

If Miss Swan's corset was so tight she could not breathe, and she fainted from it, then what reserve of air was in her lungs that she could survive the plunge to the depths and back up again?

Ol' funny eye screamed about being burned, but the cursed has no feeling as Captain Barbossa informs us.

How is it the cursed carried such wonderful fresh food aboard a ship when for a decade they have been unable to eat? Any food aboard makes no sense. Apples in the Caribbean in the 18th century? And how is it the blade plunged into Barbossa has blood on it when withdrawn?

If the cursed cannot "die" (and we repeatedly see them walk away after mortal wounds), then why is it that "William 'Bootstrap' Turner" - who was cursed by stealing the medallion - stayed dead upon being thrown to "Davy Jones' Locker"? The other medallions were on the Isle so don't say it was because he sent the medallion to his son. If the cursed pirates can walk the ocean depths, then why not ol' Bootstrap?

If Capn' Sparrow can immediately become a dead and cursed skeleton upon stealing the gold medallion, then why didn't Elizabeth when she stole that same medallion in the cavern? Or young Mr. Turner who also stole it. If it makes one immediately cursed, and dead, and the dead can't bleed, how came it to be that Will Turner could bleed and thereby release the curse?

Why is it blood was not required of every other piece of gold retrieved?

If Isle de la Muerta is only found by those already knowing its location, (and still a special compass is needed) then how did the Commodore's ship find it? There was a huge squall when Sparrow made way to the isle in the 'fastest ship in the fleet', so they could not have followed.

What is it with Depp's accent? It doesn't quite belong anywhere, and he acts as though he is blitzed or something throughout the whole film... (he marred "Chocolate", one of my favorite films, with his dreadful Irish accent!) if you look carefully, you can catch sight of some of his tattoos. I wonder how he felt making the little "France" joke, which obviously caters to the current American distaste for the country. (More blatant and foul in the deleted scene for it, with its allusions to eunuchs, the French, and mayonnaise.) Screenwriters should be careful in period films about modern allusions as they invoke stream of consciousness thoughts, causing the mind to wander from the film, possibly never to return. If the mind does not make the connection, then there is no point to the allusion. Screen writing Russian Roulette, guys.

For fun, you can even sneak a peek at Bloom's LOTR elvish tattoo on his right lower forearm. I suspect he will come to regret such obvious placement. (Elijah Wood was probably wise in getting his placed below the belt line.) Bloom is an up and coming actor and I look forward to seeing him in new roles.

And so on. At this writing, Disney is just releasing its second film based on one of its rides, "The Haunted Mansion" it seems to be getting little fanfare, so maybe the trend will stop. It is, of course, better than them ruining great old films by filming remakes.

On the plus side, Rush is impressive as usual, and if you let the film just wash over you it can be fun. At least the first time around.

8 Seconds (1994)

Get it for the real Lane Frost end credits!

[4/10 · 5 December 2003]

Anyone who spent time with Lane or guffawed at Tuff's assessment of lesser riders, ("Ol' so-n-so wants to be a bull rider, problem is, he's skairt o' bulls!") will have a hard time finding the real boys in this film. Instead they will cringe at badly done accents and wonder where the boy's likability went. No loved one is spared, and the writers seemed to go out of their way to transform Lane's Justins from leather to clay. Why does the media tear down our heroes?

Luke Perry's affected accent borders on parody and Cynthia Geary, (formerly "Shelly" on "Northern Exposure"), is downright unappealing as Lane's wife, Kellie. All too often TV actors lack a certain texture to make it on the big screen, and the casting here proves it. I suspect the powers that be were trying to cash in on the popularity of Perry's and Geary's television shows. The late Red Mitchell, a genuine Texan, and film actor, was excellent as the poetry spouting "Cody Lambert". Cowboy poetry is a real art form, but the real Cody Lambert wasn't known for his poetical abilities.

Further evidence that Perry is no Lane Frost comes from the scene where he tosses his hat, brim down, on a chair. No self respecting cowboy would ever do that! (In fact, it was a rapid glance test for sniffing out coca-cola cowboys back in the days following "Urban Cowboy" when everyone and their brother was trying to pass as a "real cowboy". On that subject, a lot of rodeo cowboys are treated with disdain by those from working ranches. Rodeo is an extremely expensive "hobby" and most "real cowboys" can't afford to ride any circuit other than the pasture fence line.) The vast majority of rodeo cowboys, and wage riding cowboys, for that matter, end up so stoved up that they are old men by the age of 40, something the film gave a passing nod to.

Lane really did wear a wild turkey feather in his hatband, but he wasn't hurt by Red Rock, who was actually a popular bull to draw. The trailer in the picture was an insult to the man, and they did split up for awhile, but it wasn't over cheating. Tuff really did manage to hang on for 8 more seconds in honor of Lane during his ride at the 1989 National Rodeo Finals. You can say well, heck, it is only a movie, cut it some slack, but I say this is about a real man who really touched a lot of people's hearts, and those that don't know any better now only get this fractured view of him. He deserved a lot better.

Then there is the way family members are portrayed. If one believes this movie, the whole Frost family had closeness issues... and that is just with the parents. Lane's siblings are ignored all together. In real life, Elsie is generous and the picture of Christian charity, and bless her for it, but this film showed her and Clyde in a pretty bad light, and doesn't say much for his real life wife either.

Still, there are some interesting moments, and an absolutely priceless credit sequence where we get to see the real Lane Frost in action. Your heart can leap into your mouth watching him get busted up by those bulls and you may cheer when he gets up and walks away with that infectious grin of his. If you want to be a bullrider, you may even give it a rethink after seeing that even a champion gets stomped every once in awhile.

I always bust out sobbing while those precious minutes roll by, but it is from seeing Lane ride again, and being mentally transported back in time. Those were exciting and very stressful years, and I frankly resent the director's attempt to force us into reaching for the tissues by the choice in music over the credits. (Typical country tearjerkers.) Instead of walking away in contemplation, or in marvel of Lane's life, we are left on a very big downer, a box office killer and further proof someone was asleep on the job. Lane would not have wanted that for us.

Overall, I give it low marks for the mauling of a genuine American Hero, but qualified high marks for that credit sequence!

Skinwalkers (2002 TV Movie)

I like the film even if it interchanges tribes

[26 November 2003]

I recently watched "Skinwalkers" again and enjoyed it more than I did the first time around. As I wrote in my Coyote Waits review, etc., I dislike that moviemakers think Native tribes are interchangeable. I am not only talking about the mispronouncing of words or the expression of cultural ideas, but something more apparent at first glance... somatotypes. Major tribes have different body types, facial structure, ways of speaking, dressing, walking, and even hair styles. They can be as different from each other as they are to non indigenous races. For example: Comanche tend to be tall, muscular and golden skinned. Navajo necks tend to look shorter with the head seemingly very close to the shoulders, in both genders. Sioux have killer cheekbones, while Apache faces are broader, and their legs are shorter; Mohawk noses tend to be "hawkish" and they "look indian" even if the person is a mixed blood with blonde hair and blue eyes! I could go on and on, but you get the point. I also find it amusing that Adam Beach's character pointed out Apache somatotypes in "Smoke Signals", so the actor cannot possibly be unaware. You will see more Navajo in Skinwalkers than I recall seeing in Coyote Waits, and I bet you will soon start recognizing who in the film is a real Navajo and who is not... giving you an appreciation of what some of us keep complaining about.

I thought Adam Beach was better in this film and I thought the plot was better. They still didn't film in the right locations as the Navajo are Mesa people, but the scenery is beautiful just the same.

Michael Greyeyes can do an insane smile better than anyone since Martin Landau. Even if you haven't seen the other films in the series, you can enjoy this film as it doesn't pull in important references from the others. It has problems, sure, but I enjoyed the ride.

The Devil's Advocate (1997)

"The Firm" taken one step further

[6/10 · 26 November 2003]

"The Devil's Advocate" explores and expands upon themes introduced to moviegoers in "The Firm", but with a mythical overlay. (I realize both films are based on books, but the analogy still works.)

"The Devil's Advocate" doesn't take itself too seriously, which is good, as the harsh themes could have mired it down completely.

The director didn't quite trust our ability to understand some of the point plots without bludgeoning us over the head with them, but sometimes that can be forgiven.

Acting in The Devil's Advocate is uneven and at times, gloriously over the top. Keanu Reeves, I am coming to realize, is cursed with a face too placidly built to express emotions convincingly. The scene where he is crying out while holding his wife illustrates what I mean. While his anguished voice and actions are muted by the lack of plasticity in his face, his pain is evident. I think his best bit of acting comes from the scene where he has alternating bodies under his thrusting loins. In those moments his face is more expressive than I can ever recall seeing it, and he seems more "real" than he has since "Bill and Ted". (The only film I ever recall him looking really happy in.)

Ms Theron, as usual, told volumes with each nuanced glance, and Al Pacino is delicious as the modern era devil, one of the last roles before he started phoning it in with recycled personas. (The Insider, Simone, The Recruit) Naming his character "John Milton" is splendid irony. I get a big kick out of the look on his face as he threatens to plunge a finger in the basin of consecrated water. The devil as mischievous school-boy, reminding us of why he "fell" in the first place.

The nudity, while a bit too much for my tastes, was curiously more sensual than sexual, and the near ending brought to mind the "Bobby in the shower scene" from Dallas...

If you believe in the devil, this film can be disturbing. If you don't, it can be an interesting romp on the darker side. Take it at the value the director assigned it and you can be entertained for a few hours.

Total Eclipse (1995)

Thank God River Phoenix didn't star in this offal

[19 November 2003]

I was interested in Rimbaud until I watched this pretentious, smutty film. I wish I had never seen it (and it has been a few years since I had the misfortune to rent it.) It left a really bad impression.

This film ruined Leonardo DiCaprio films for me. Really. I have no issue with gays. I do take issue with low-life cruelty for cruelties sake, which this film specializes in. If Rimbaud was really like this film portrays, he deserves to be forgotten.

I am putting in my two-cents worth because I just read that Rimbaud would have been played by River Phoenix, had he lived. I hate that Phoenix is dead, but I am grateful that he wasn't in this horrible film. John Malkovich was wise to bow out.

JFK (1991)

Occam's Razor and Oliver Stone

[19 November 2003]

"JFK" has been controversial from the moment of its inception. Its director, Oliver Stone, has been reviled as a revisionist and heralded as a visionary.

The film "JFK" seeks to vindicate Jim Garrison, the former DA of New Orleans, who wholeheartedly believed a conspiracy existed to kill President Kennedy, and to shut up anyone who came too close to "the truth".

If we could slake off all these years since 1963, or even 1991, we would see how drastically the average person's view has changed. The vast majority now believe that Kennedy's killing was the result of a conspiracy. Many think Oswald was framed, and some even think there were two or more guys answering to the name of Oswald.

"JFK" has taken on an aura of "fact" to so many that passions can be aroused if one voices a dissenting opinion in the wrong company. Not a lot of films have had the kind of impact. On the bonus side, the film JFK helped to get documents released which would have been kept from the public for 75 years after the assassination. These documents, a veritable mountain of them, are available to the public in varying degrees.

In 1991 things seemed more black and white.

Did I believe in a conspiracy then? It is hard to recall. Do I believe in one now? Yes. I believe that a conspiracy exists, on the Internet, in books and in the media, to present such an information overload that "we" allow the "experts" to feed us their Cliff Notes version of the 1963 events. They eat, digest, and we swallow.

The web's minutia of everything Kennedy is mind boggling. Every point has a counterpoint. Every truth has a lie. Every ass gets to bray, and we are left to sort it out. You must make up your own mind on this movie and on the events that spawned it. For my part, the jury is still out. I tend to follow Occam's Razor, but research for this review has left me battered and reeling, and just as confused as anybody.

Tombstone (1993)

Is to Earp films what T-bone steak is to Steakums...

[18 November 2003]

"Tombstone" is a memorable film which is best viewed in the extended version. While most scenes restored in already released films are a gimmick to get you to part with more cash, the restored scenes in Tombstone should never have been cut in the first place, as they tie up loose ends which marred the original theatrical release, and kept it from true greatness.

Then there is the other Wyatt Earp film of the season. (What was it with Costner? Wyatt Earp wasn't the first time he tried to beat a premised film to market. First there was the competing "Robin Hoods" of 1991. Costner was so arrogant that he did not even attempt an English accent. Totally unwatchable rubbish.)

Comparing Tombstone to Costner's "Wyatt Earp" is like comparing fresh hens eggs to that powdered stuff the army serves up... you can roll Tombstone around in your mouth, exploring its every texture, or you can watch Costner play Costner while you gulp down the reconstituted mess, which, they tell you, "is just as filling." Yes, it will keep you alive, but something essential is missing.

Length doth not an epic make.

Tombstone has the epic feel. Tombstone has "scope". A finely choreographed testosterone slaughter-fest. Its dusty streets and wooden walks are brought to life in exquisite expectation, where Russell and Kilmer stride, larger than life, dueling and dwarfing worthy adversaries.

There is a timeless feel to the film; a hyper-reality, which makes all other "Earp" films pale in comparison.

Coyote Waits (2003 TV Movie)

Not as fulfilling as it should have been

[17 November 2003]

Based on a Tony Hillerman novel, "Coyote Waits" brings back characters familiar to viewers of "Skinwalkers" and 1991's "Dark Wind", which starred Fred Ward and Lou Diamond Phillips. If you have not seen the previous films, you can still enjoy "Coyote Waits" for its own sake.

Adam Beach reprises his "Skinwalkers" role as "Jim Chee", alongside other "Skinwalkers" veterans, Sheila Tousey, and Wes Studi. None of the three are actually Navajo, though they are Native American. Personally I think casting should be based on the best actor for the part, and would have liked to see Phillips reprise his role. Beach is not a Navajo either and is still learning his craft; Phillips is a seasoned veteran. (Before folks get upset let me say this, tribal background should be taken in account when casting Native American roles. It is insulting to insist the tribes are interchangeable. Recall how silly it was for a Swedish accented actor to play a Frenchman in "Good Will Hunting"? It is the same point here.)

Presented in letterbox format, the scenery is at once mystical, isolating and all-encompassing. The production values lift it above "made for tv" status. The language, mild by todays standards, does use the popular term for excrement several times, but not gratuitously. The scenery is beautiful. The picture-postcard-blue of one scene's sky is so beautiful it brings a tear to the eye.

The plot is not as meaty as it could have been and some roles could have been eliminated without too much loss to the whole.

The intentions are good but there comes a time when intentions should be removed from the equation. "Coyote Waits" is not as fulfilling as it could have been, regardless of its intentions.

The Jack Bull (1999 TV Movie)

Overlong Cusack downfest

[15 November 2003]

****** SPOILERS ******

Let me save you the price of a rental. I'll even sum it all up for you.

Ready for it?

"Life's a b**ch and then you die."

Now don't ever say I never did nothing for ya.

I want my money back.

Much Ado About Nothing (1993)

An accessible Shakespeare, an inspired director

[15 November 2003]

I cut my teeth on Shakespeare and have long lamented that most filmed versions are so ponderously heavy that they crush the very life out of the Bard's works. We generally are left gasping for air, or are bored to tears listening to wooden tongued actors laboring over words whose meanings they never seem to comprehend. If the actor fails in this, how can the listener be expected to understand? Shakespeare was not meant to be recited, but acted; and acted with full expression.

Branagh gives us this "full expression" in his very accessible "Much Ado About Nothing".

Like few others, Branagh understands that Shakespeare wrote for the masses. He understands that the loftiness imposed upon the works is the doing of those who would keep us from our linguistic inheritance. Yes! The Bard wrote for us all, and Branagh, rebel that he is, scrapes off centuries of greasepaint to spread the jeweled words at our feet. Branagh is one of the few who realizes that we each deserve those jewels, by right of being human.

This is not to say there are not problems with the production. There are a few, and mostly they stem from the choice in actors.

Keanu Reeves is hopelessly miscast. The least said of him, the better. Denzel's skin color is not an issue with me, casting him is more proof of Branagh's outlaw brain. My issue with Washington is his too sedate delivery, though he finds his footing a bit better as the film progresses.

Were Shakespeare to be secreted at a screening I think he would heartily approve of Michael Keating's performance as "Dogberry". That character is the real comic relief in the piece and Keating's intimate understanding of the role gives him license to give Dogberry full expression. I suspect those who cannot let themselves enjoy the performance are trapped in the amber of the Bard's supposed loftiness.

Robert Sean Leonard is just a bit dull, but then he is standing too near the blinding brightness of classically trained actors. He has real talent. I would have enjoyed seeing him play Puck in the 1999 filmed production of "A Midsummer's Night Dream". The snippet from "Dead Poet's Society" is a fine indication of where he would have taken the part. If you compare Michael Hoffman's aforementioned movie, you will find further proof of Branagh's genius. (On "Pucks"... Mickey Rooney's chalk-board screeching Puck in 1935's version should be avoided at all costs. Tucci's too. Both show what is wrong with most filmed versions.)

Richard Briers and Brian Blessed were born to be Shakespearean actors, and their common touch should set an example to all who would make Shakespeare accessible. Alex Lowe, who played the messenger, should have a bright future on the stage.

Branagh's mixture of Hollywood and classically trained thespians works to make this film one of the best Shakespeare adaptations ever!

A Night in the Life of Jimmy Reardon (1988)

The anti-comedy

[12 November 2003]

"A Night In The Life Of Jimmy Reardon" is a grinless Coming Of Age film which has been mis-packaged as a comedy. It almost seems as if half the film was in the can before someone on high decided to change the genre... either that or Richert forgot to film a lot of scenes.

River Phoenix is said to have been ashamed of his part in the film, but he is actually not bad, considering the material he had to rise above. Reardon gives us a Phoenix who has not yet become hard-eyed, 'though the character he played was nearly graceless. River still had fuzz on his chin and boyish charm. This was a young man on the cusp of greatness.

The adult actors in this film were dreadful and the other young actors were uneven. I hardly recognized Mathew Perry. Talk about a baby face!

Watching Reardon is like watching kids try to play grownup. The script was originally written for older actors and would have been better if older actors were used. Those used seemed hardly past puberty, and had no idea how to play "sexually jaded" at all.

Overall, I prefer Reardon to "Dogfight" as a River Phoenix vehicle and a comparison of the box-office take shows many others did too.

See it if only to see a still innocent River Phoenix playing a young man far removed from himself.

To Die For (1995)

Real life ugly and wonderful

[11 November 2003]

People either like this film or hate it entirely. It is called a black comedy, but is best thought of as a revenge fantasy. My idea of a black comedy is "I Love You To Death", a Kevin Kline, River Phoenix vehicle.

"To Die For" is loosely based on several actual cases. Few of the characters are likable, and fewer still are innocent, but that is how it goes in Suzanne Stone's psychotic world.

Joaquin Phoenix is compelling and believable as the young man blinded by devotion to a manipulative older woman, played by Nicole Kidman. (I get a kick out of watching his wonderfully jangly dancing, it is just so authentic and natural. I always pause there on my fast forward to the end for my next favorite scene.) Phoenix's character is, at that moment, so touching and earnest, and utterly out of his depth.

I am a fan of Donovan's "Season Of The Witch" (which is played over the closing credits) and always get it stuck in my head for a few hours, after watching this film. I also love watching the smiling skater glide over the ice, knowing what she knows...

ER (1994–2009)

Jumping the Shark?

[9 November 2003]

This series, so beloved by viewers, can be a maddening mess to anyone with medical experience! The loss of regulars to be replaced by mis-pronouncing, overly-aggressive, medically lethargic, idiots ("Pratt" in particular) is such a turn off. In "The Greater Good" Goran Visnjic gives "Pratt" looks of sheer disgust, twice, and it sums up my feelings beautifully. You can only change casts so often before the series dies.

I think ER is close to Jumping the shark, the old regulars & Visnjic can't do it all alone! Perhaps that is why some are bailing, or threatening to. I hope something turns around pronto, or put it out of our misery and let it live in re-runs.

Running on Empty (1988)

Some great acting, a troubled plot

[9 November 2003]

On TV, in the late 1980's, "Roseanne" and "Punky Brewster" gave us back-talking, disrespectful kids and anti-hero parental figures. The ratings went through the roof so the media started catering to the lowest common denominator on TV and in films. It has never looked back. I remember seeing this film in the 80's and distinctly thinking it was a harbinger of things to come. At the time it was shocking to hear the profane words coming out of the mouth of a beloved "Taxi" figure. (Judd Hirsch) Now profanity in place of dialogue has become the norm, and strings of curse words are used to convey deep emotion. This film helped start the trend for films with expected younger audiences.

Hirsh plays an "Abbie Hoffman" type in the film and a drunken nod is given to Hoffman's crisis of self. Of course, it is no wonder, as Abbie Hoffman had recently come out of hiding. The joke was... no one really cared. (I clearly recall a lampoon in the paper about Hoffman coming out of hiding and jokes about no one knowing who he was. "Wasn't he in Kramer vs Kramer" it read.) Had Hoffman not come out of hiding, I doubt this film would have been made. (I doubt he would have killed himself, as well.)

Knowing that the FBI had lost a lot of interest in old radicals by the time it was filmed made the subject matter more palatable to the studios while still seeming "hip."

The actors perform well but the character of the parents were nearsighted and selfish for most of their lives, and the ending can't really undo that much damage. Thankfully, though, the mother truly loves her sons and she does her best to give her elder son some type of stability in an unstable situation. The younger son seems a throwaway in the plot.

The film has more than its share of ugliness (The sleazy blond radical is disgusting) and Martha Plimpton's character is annoying more often than not. Some scenes are beautiful in the extreme, where truths are revealed. River's loyalty seems to mirror his real life experiences, once again. His character struggles to do right when all he has been raised with is wrong. If you live with a lie every moment of your life, your psyche will fracture. Phoenix does a credible job of bringing that fact to our attention as he struggles to find balance. He is both wizened and youthful in the role. Unfortunately it has become impossible to watch the actor through pristine lenses - hindsight being what it is. He was one of the greatest actors ever filmed, and like Hoffman, he has become forgotten in less than 10 years by any but true fans.

Quills (2000)

Defend against censorship

[8 November 2003]

Having seen darker appetites indulged and the repercussions in reality, I thought to always steer clear of this film, due to the subject matter.

I then read that Joaquin Phoenix was fantastic in it, and being a Phoenix completest, I decided to bite the bullet and give it a watch.

It is an amazing film. I still did not care for the (generally perceived) subject matter, but found myself, as a writer, viewing it in the larger context of censorship. And like all writers, I'd fight for the right for a colleague's work to be read, even if I hated it.

The acting is unbelievably good.

Joaquin Phoenix was perfection as the corrupt Emperor Commodus in "Gladiator" (I can't even envision anyone else in that role) yet, he is perfection in this radically different role as well. That takes a prodigious talent to pull off. I think he could have handled the Mel Gibson role in "Signs", instead of being cast as the brother. I hope that he has a long and happy career.

Geoffrey Rush has great range as an actor, and this role proves it beyond a doubt. Michael Caine continues his great stride, and Winslet is developing with each picture.

This isn't a film I'd want to watch often, (I can't stomach the reading of Sade's prose for long) but it is a film which is better than expected.

Untamed Heart (1993)

Purity of heart and of love

[8 November 2003]

Anytime you hear "Nature Boy" played as a film opener, you know someone is about to jerk your heartstrings. Yet knowing we are being manipulated, and knowing where the plot is heading, we watch it and weep, even if that was not our intention at the sit-down. Perhaps through this film we re-experience love's first blush; or recall a longing for what might have been, sometime, somewhere, in our own lives. It can be a touching film, if we haven't become too jaded; and cloying if we have. A bonus is getting to hear Nat King Cole singing in that velvet voice of his. It sets a complimentary tone to the plot, when used.

Christian Slater is impressive as usual, only breaking character during the hockey scenes when he gets so totally into it that the cool guy self slips past the restrained character facade. He uses his eyes to great effect in this film, far more than in any other, and he pulls off some unlikely lines with such conviction. (Note that Nature Boy underscores these moments) Tomei's eyes are too dark to be really expressive and it makes some think she is a lesser actress than she really is. Her role in this film is as a mixture of bony comfort giver and heart-on-her-sleeve lost girl who wants love so desperately that she always ends up getting hurt.

Adam, Slater's character, has a heart condition and believes a fantastic story about a Silverback Baboon King and a jungle adventurer, and it shapes his personality profoundly. Only he can get away with stealing her picture, following her home, and sneaking into her room at night, without coming across as a creepy stalker. His motives are pure and even heroic. In fact, the man with the "baboon heart", and the "heart bruised" girl, unwanted by anyone else, but each other, reminds us that there is someone for everyone, no matter what station in life we tread.

Nature Boy, sung by Nat King Cole, and played over the closing credits is hauntingly beautiful, as always. I could listen to him forever.

My Own Private Idaho (1991)

Better than expected

[7 November 2003]

I refused to see this film for many years because of the association it has with turning River Phoenix on to drugs. Rightly or wrongly, Keanu Reeves has shared in this blame.

I have known River Phoenix types all my life, at once so talented, yet suffering so profoundly that death becomes a longing, consciously or not. And I've known several "Mike Waters" types too. They have a lot in common, though their talents take them in different directions.

The young hustlers of this world must harden, escape, or cease to be. In the case of Mike Waters, the character, River Phoenix, the actor, transcended art when he gave the camera the semblance of the essential being ceasing to exist. Few actors could have pulled it off so convincingly. (This film keeps bringing to mind Shakespearean quotes, but I'll spare you those. As for the "essential being ceasing to exist", I can't help but thinking of Jim Morrison's soul-exodus on stage; or River's breakthrough in "Silent Tongue." Filmed later, "The Thing Called Love" gave us an essentially soulless man.)

My Own Private Idaho can rip your heart out at times, and change your perceptions of life. How you react will depend on where you are in your journey of life when you watch it. Your perception may change in time; I know mine have.

Being a Shakespeare lover, I was amused at the actors attempts during the "King Henry IV" moments. William Richert alone felt at home. Perhaps this is where Branagh got the idea to cast Keanu in "Much Ado About Nothing". (I kept expecting Scott to utter "Like, uh, if your leisure served, dude, I would speak with you.") Keanu excels as the heavy in "The Gift" and is compelling as Siddhartha, as it fits his one-dimensional nature, but he will always be "Ted Logan" to me.)

Back to Idaho. The scene where River, as Mike Waters, falls and crawls on the pavement among broken glass and trash, utterly abandoned, seems to foreshadow future events. (It has been said Johnny Depp scars his skin over important moments in his life. Is there a scar for River Phoenix?)

The mere shell of Mike Waters is soon back on that lonely stretch of highway, and we are left with our own conclusions as to his fate. Narcolepsy overtakes him and he falls in the road. A car pulls up, two men get out and rob his prostrate form. They leave and another driver arrives. Because of the locale & the way the driver looks & walks, I choose to believe his brother/father happened upon him and took him home, maybe this time, with love and acceptance. What you choose to believe is just as valid. Only Gus Van Sant knows for sure, and I would not be surprised if even his opinion changed from time to time.