myavalon Reviews

Casablanca (1942)

You played it for her, you can play it for me

[10/10 · 12 June 2006]

At this point, Casablanca is so universally beloved that it's almost not worth giving it a positive review. But how can I not? Not only is it brilliant on almost every level (except the feminist one-"You'll have to do the thinking for both of us"), but it was the film that first made me into a movie geek. At the end, when Bogie gives up Bergman for the sake of the war, I was just completely stunned. Movies were allowed to end that way? I suddenly realized how much potential there was in the art of the moving picture. It also started my great love affair with Humphrey Bogart. Not conventionally handsome, still he can induce swoons with one heartbroken look.

Once Upon a Time in the West (1968)

You can play, but can you shoot?

[10/10 · 5 June 2006]

This is my personal favorite of all director Sergio Leone's movies. Watching it, it's almost amazing how perfectly everything comes together. The four main characters each have their own theme music, all of which are haunting tunes that stay in your mind after the movie. All of the performances are excellent- Claudia Cardinale as a world-weary former prostitute, Jason Robards as a romantic "half-breed" bandit, Charles Bronson as a quiet, vengeful vigilante, and Henry Fonda as a sadistic hit man. Each of them are more then they seem, and whether they ultimately prove to be good or bad, they affect everything around them. A sort of grand opera fairy tale, Once Upon a Time in the West may not just be Leone's best movie, but the best Western ever made.

Plan 9 from Outer Space (1957)

A labor of love

[3/10 · 5 June 2006]

Plan 9 is notoriosly one of the worst movies ever made, and yet... I just don't have the heart to rate it any lower then this. Ed Wood, the director, clearly cared so much about his work of art- he wasn't just out for the money, he really loved making movies. True, Plan 9 is bad, but it's enjoyably bad, like a high school yearbook photo. They were working with baisically no budget, and to me it's much worse when people have the money and still can't make a good film. The idea that the aliens want to destroy us to keep us from developing a bomb so powerful it could destroy the universe is actually kind of thought-provoking, especially from an age where threat of the bomb was always lurking. Had it been handled better, it could have been a twilight-zone style chiller, but even as it is, you can't help but admire Wood's efforts.

The Lost Boys (1987)

Think of it as a survival guide

[9/10 · 4 June 2006]

A sort of comibination comedy-horror cult film, The Lost Boys has a special place in my heart. It not only has one of the sexiest, most charismatic vampires on the screen (Keifer Sutherland before he played good guys), it appeals to the horror nerd within the viewer. Who wouldn't want to think that years of reading cheesy comics was good preparation for fighting the undead, or that squirt guns can be used as deadly weopens? The initiation scene is perhaps unintentionally erotic,k and the whole movie has a nice atmosphere. It's a little too slick, which may bug you, but on the whole, it's a must for vampire afficianados.

Manos: The Hands of Fate (1966)

Oh, the Humanity

[1/10 · 3 June 2006]

I should note here that I sort of like bad movies. If it's amusing and campy, I'll cut it a break.

But Manos is different.

My god. What can I say about a movie so bad that it makes Plan 9 From Outer Space look like Casablanca? What can I say about a movie that has endless looped scenes of driving, the worst evil henchman in movie history, the lamest dialouge this side of my first grade hebrew school play, a movie that seems to have put together by people with utter contempt for the audience's intelligence? All I can say is this: it seems The Master's prayers to Satan have been answered. This movie is pure hell.

Clerks (1994)

Murphey's Law Humor

[7/10 · 3 June 2006]

Clerks is the sort of move that is both funny and painful at the same time. Poor Dante Hicks just cannot get a break. Nothing ever seems to go right for him, from his love life to his friends to his career, but his freak outs and mishaps are just so funny. It's as if Kevin Smith had been quoting Bugs Bunny:

"Hmm, what can I do to this guy next?"

This cult classic has earned it's reputation, but I would advise against keeping it where your little brother could find it. Either he'll pick up on the profanity, or he'll become depressed about the future of the human race.

The Dirty Dozen (1967)

Rooting for the Bad Guys

[10/10 · 3 June 2006]

As a post-Vietnam, post-9/11, mid-Iraq female, I really shouldn't like this movie. I guess I'm supposed to prefer sensitive, emotional dramas where people resolve their differences through peaceful means. I should be appalled by the brutality and savagery displayed in this "guy movie." Yeah. Sure.

Come on! It has everything going for it- a great cast, biting dialouge, adrenaline-charged action, not to mention Charles Bronson, a personal crush of mine.

They may be bad guys (except for Bronson and Brown, who seem to have been justified in committing their crimes), but you just have to cheer them on.