lloydjonesm Reviews

The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare (2024)

The Mastery of Unimpressive Filmmaking....

[2/10 · 13 May 2024]

Oh dear oh dear. I had high hopes for this. Very loosely based on the real life exploits of Operation Postmaster it had an unarguably impressive cast....the Fleming/Bond connection....what could possibly go wrong? Well, most of it as it turns out. The Tarantino/Inglorious Basterds influence was pretty visible from the get-go. Difference is that Mr T knows how to make a movie like this, whereas this was a shambolic mess. Churchill was awful. The stereotypical Nazis were easy prey (of course)....and the odd attempt at humour seemed badly misplaced. I would much rather have seen a grittier, darker version of this story which better conveyed the heroism of those guys that actually took part, rather than a parody of it.

Enough said. I actually haven't finished watching it yet. I turned off about three quarters of the way through as I'd had enough. I may watch the end. Then again....

Last Seen Alive (2022)

Don't waste your time....

[2/10 · 15 September 2022]

Not even Gerard Butler could pull this one out of the more. Half the actors look like extras roped in for the speaking parts, when they could actually remember their lines. The scene where Mr B is running through the forest must be when he read the script and realised just how bad this movie was going to be. The flashbacks are awful, the score monotonous. One of the characters is even called knuckles...I mean, c'mon.

I wish I had one good thing to say about this film, but I don't ....

And I tried to finish it there but apparently all reviews now have to be 600 chars long. Who thought that one up and why??

In that case I'll carry on - Gerard butlers accent (accents) were also bad....wavering between English, Irish and American. The plot was weak (been there, done that). Offered nothing new or original. Just glad I didn't pay to go see it.

Stranger Things (2016–2025)

I miss Bob!

[10/10 · 14 June 2022]

Not going to write much here, it's already been said I'm sure.

This series is fantastic, it just gets better and better. I'm at the end of season 2 and can't wait to see what happens next. It's got everything, characters you care about, a gripping storyline, artful direction, humour.

Anyway that's enough! If you haven't seen it yet, tune in. You won't be disappointed.

The Northman (2022)

Time-filler and that's about it....

[3/10 · 13 May 2022]

Disappointing and pretty forgettable. Made about as much sense as one of Bjork's songs.

Mostly filmed in Ireland I see. Did someone spell Iceland wrong??

Boiling Point (I) (2021)

Serves up a treat....

[8/10 · 27 November 2021]

A stark, documentary-style look at the inner workings of a top-tier restaurant on a night in which just about everything that could go wrong, does.

Gripping, absorbing and classily-acted, Stephen Graham was excellent, as were the rest of the cast.

A thoroughly entertaining piece of film making and highly recommended.

Dream Horse (2020)

There's Lovely...!

[8/10 · 20 November 2021]

I'm Welsh and I never even knew there was a Welsh Grand National, so this storyline came as something of a surprise!

At first I was a little sceptical of the casting of the two lead roles in Dream Horse....but Toni Collette and Damian Lewis nailed it, and kudos to both for the convincing Welsh accents....not easy!

Movies like this should be made more often. A simple story, well told, at just about the right pace and the ending that you secretly hope for. Further proof that you don't need huge budgets, over the top SFX, gratuitous violence and unnecessary obscenities to make a decent movie these days.

Loved the Delilah rendition at the end, and some of those throwaway typically Welsh one-liners dotted throughout really made me laugh out loud too..!!

Thoroughly recommended.

Invasion (2021–2024)

Invasion of the Dodgy plot Hatchers

[3/10 · 11 November 2021]

Who commissioned this nonsense? An undercover Google employee?

If this series were a Mac it'd be the G4 cube....a broken one at that.

Another Apple+ Unoriginal. Well done!

No Time to Die (2021)

Adequate ....

[6/10 · 5 October 2021]

Very few films of this length have kept my attention throughout, and unfortunately this wasn't one of them. Casino Royale was always going to be a hard follow-up act and for me remains the most entertaining to date, capturing the true essence of Bond.

There's nothing intrinsically wrong with this film. It's hard to point your finger at one element and say that it truly brought the rest of the movie down. But there was something missing....and I still can't quite figure out what it was.

Be interesting to see how the franchise develops but I have a feeling that - like Daniel Craig - this might well be my last Bond movie......

Old (2021)

Old's not gold, it left me cold !

[3/10 · 23 September 2021]

Oh dear. Poor old Rufus Sewell. I imagine that when he saw the finished product he must have cringed.

I had high expectations for this movie, hoping for another Sixth Sense or The Village. Both great films. What I saw instead was a badly put together piece of nonsense. In addition to the obvious plot holes, the film has no soul. I didn't care what happened to any of the characters as I wasn't remotely invested in them. The dialogue was stilted, the screenplay hopeless, actors had no chance. SFX, such as they were, were derisory. Maybe this is a consequence of one person having too much creative input and/or a shoestring budget. If not, then there are no excuses.

To Be Someone (2020)

Ohgodrophenia!

[2/10 · 8 September 2021]

Utter drivel. Enough said.

Only gave it 2 for a couple of tracks in the music score.

The Protégé (2021)

Actually...pretty decent

[7/10 · 7 September 2021]

A little surprised at some of the low ratings. There are plenty of films in this genre, but this is one of the better ones. I'm a Michael Keaton fan (I always thought he was the best Batman!) and he doesn't disappoint in this. Neither do Maggie Q or SLJ. Some of the plot twists stretch reality a bit, but hey, guess what, it's a movie!

Hopefully there'll be a sequel if it makes enough at the box office.....

Our Ladies (2019)

Must have watched a different movie....

[4/10 · 4 June 2021]

Unfunny, unconvincing and unrealistic.

Sure, I get it, teen girls talk about sex.

But not 100% of the time and to the detriment of just about everything else as this movie would have you believe.... Gave up half way through.

A Call to Spy (2019)

Forgettable.....

[3/10 · 1 March 2021]

A Ripping Yarns version of the real story...needed to be grittier

Honest Thief (2020)

Not Liam's best....

[3/10 · 15 December 2020]

This movie was pretty much held together by the dog...some impressively downcast looks to camera and the occasional sad whine....maybe it had seen the script?

Twin Town (1997)

Rhagorol! (Excellent in Welsh!)

[10/10 · 14 October 2020]

Watched it a few times now....i'm Welsh and went to Uni in Swansea so know it very well, especially the infamous and now long-gone Baron's nightclub ! The film is cracking - funny, poignant, serious and ultimately rewarding when the bad guy gets whats coming to him. The final scene with the choir on Mumbles pier still gives me goosebumps when I watch it. Nice to hear that a "companion" piece called Tin is in the offing, based in Llanelli i think....and in the meantime a short production exists called La Cha Cha which has some of the same cast and same director. As an aside I bumped into the twins (aka the ifans brothers) on a toilet stop in a small car park on the way to see relatives in North Wales years ago. I was so surprised that by the time I summoned up the courage to go and tell them how much I'd enjoyed the film they'd jumped in the car and gone! :-((

Eurovision Song Contest: The Story of Fire Saga (2020)

Where were they??

[3/10 · 28 June 2020]

I only sat through this till the end because I thought there surely had to be an appearance by the elves ! Even checked out the end credits, just in case. No joy :-( Elves would have meant a 5/10 review score. No elves = 3/10.

Night Hunter (2018)

Dreary....

[4/10 · 30 April 2020]

Interesting enough premise but got progressively sillier and unrealistic. Big sigh of relief and several yawns when end credits rolled.

1917 (2019)

"You MUST see this film...."...hmmm

[5/10 · 16 January 2020]

When that's the teaser for a new movie you just can't help but get pulled in...to what turned out to be, in the end, a bit of a disappointment. I deliberately didn't read any reviews in advance of the screening I saw, but by the end if it I was left feeling that this was a mediocre piece of filmmaking that could have been much better...the story was unconvincing (surely they'd have sent at least two teams with that message), ditto the acting and I wasn't wowed by the cinematography. Sometimes long shots are useful in showing scale, and WW1 was horrific in terms of the sheer numbers of men needlessly sent to their deaths. There just wasn't a sense of any of that.... For me, Saving Private Ryan (sorry!) was able to convey the horror of war while telling an interesting story that had you hooked from the start and still had me thinking about it days afterwards. . For me, 1917 was forgettable.

Love Actually (2003)

Has it been a year already?!

[5/10 · 22 December 2019]

Top notch cast, Richard Curtis, Christmas theme...what could possibly go wrong? Firstly, unnecessary expletives doth not a masterpiece make. Second, the whole thing just feels overly contrived, it just doesn't feel 'real'. As for the Neeson/kid relationship...well need I say more. I'd have just taken that whole subplot and left it on the cutting room floor... Only saving graces were Rowan Atkinson as the shop assistant, and of course the great Alan Rickman....

The Morning Show (I) (2019– )

Thoroughly enjoyable and entertaining...

[10/10 · 4 December 2019]

I don't have any streaming subscriptions and never wanted one....until I made the "mistake" of watching the first 2 free episodes of TMS on TV+. So now I have one, simply to be able to carry on watching this compelling TV drama. In short, I love it. Some really classy acting, a great storyline with real relevance to today's world, and good fun at the same time ! I also happen to have worked in breakfast TV in the UK and TMS accurately replicates the seeming chaos that goes into what appears to be the polished end-product called a breakfast tv show!!! Well done to all involved, cast and crew.