tomcantwell Reviews

I'm a Virgo (2023)

Edward Scissorhands In The Hood

[3/10 · 23 April 2024]

I wanted to like this but it is just too fairytaleish for my tastes; even though I like fairytales. It's a reworking of the classic Ugly Duckling/misfit eventually being accepted for what they is kinda thing. None of it feels realistic and you might expect that, given it's a fairytale but the emotional grab isn't there. The tall house on stilts made of pallets is good and there are a few interesting sequences that help to establish the vibe but, ultimately, I was left thinking: what's the point? I want to be transported to a fairytale story or I want to be intrigued by a clever plot or I want a rollercoaster ride of adrenaline. I want to be entertained, in some way, and this wasn't it, for me. Maybe it will play well with it's home audience.

The Walking Dead (2010–2022)

Season 11 is extremely poor

[3/10 · 11 December 2023]

MAY CONTAIN MINOR SPOILERS. As others have said, the early seasons were exciting and captivating with later ones being increasingly ridiculous and formulaic. Season 11 is the worst one in my opinion. The acting is good, especially Cassady McClincy Zhang in the final episodes and the dialogue is okay but the plot and direction are entirely unconvincing. The Commonwealth is stated as having 50,000 people but you only ever see a few dozen and when they 'general citizens' are locked out there are only about 15 of them trying to get through the gates. The plot is also disconnected and confusing for no good reason. And what about the 'labour camp"? Just ridiculous. I watched it because i've watched all of them and loved it at the start but really, this last season is an insult to the intelligence. The main characters are still watchable and turn in good performances. There is a sufficient count of head-stabbings but even they come across as if a quota had been set before shooting began. There are also some genuinely moving moments, mostly because of good acting but the suspension of disbelief required is way over the top, even bearing in mind the level required for buying into the whole zombie thing anyway. And whose idea was it to make the zombies cleverer and more agile in the last few episodes when they hadn't been that way in the hundreds of episodes that had gone before. Watch it if you want to draw a line under it but be sure to follow it with something more intelligent, such as Barry or Curb Your Enthusiasm.

Guardians of the Galaxy (2014)

Brilliantly made borefest

[4/10 · 24 September 2023]

Stunning work on the CGI and visuals generally. Great cast as well. This will appeal to a eight or ten year old on a weekend movie watch but if you want plot, dialogue, pace and meaning then you won't find it here. Nd why should you? It's a visual treat with all the reminders of Star Wars you could ask for. Groot is the Wookie, Chris Pratt is Harrison Ford and his spaceship is the Millenium Falcon. The Star Wars Cantina scene is here throughout with endless aliens who all look like humans in make-up.

Full credit to the whole production team and I acknowledge the success of this franchise in delivering what people want. The fault is mine for watching it and thinking that I might find it entertaining instead of just a kaleidescope of things going boom and characters shooting guns that don't do anything nasty. Like in The A Team.

I watched it because people who I trust told me it was worth it. They loved it and they were nice for recommending it to me. But I thought it was just more comic book shenanigens without the promised humour and wit or, say, Peacemaker. Or The Boys. Now those are shows that do the comic book stuff and go to the trouble of including plot, pace, character, humour and all that jazz.

I'm not here to slag off this movie, i'm here to offer advice to anyone considering watching this who may have similar tastes. Thank me later.

The Morning Show (I) (2019– )

First rate scripting and acting

[8/10 · 15 September 2023]

I'm four episodes in and each one has impressed me with the quality of the writing, plot and pacing. In addition to this the acting is as good as it gets.

I always thought Jennifer Aniston was really good as an actress, over and above her obvious presentability. She was great in The Good Girl where she showed her acting chops but here, as a more mature figure, she really has that thing where she owns the screen. Like Jon Voight does in Ray Donovan.

There are no wasted moments and the show is captivating. I especially love the engagement with difficult arguments such as sexual harassment and abortion, There are two sides to a story and this show explores both, effortlessly slipping from one side to the other.

The cast is also great, as is all else about this show. I'm only four episodes in but congratulations to the team behind this.

The Swarm (2023)

First rate direction, photography and editing... for the first three episodes

[6/10 · 5 July 2023]

I just don't understand all the negative reviews for this show. Every single scene is beautifully photographed and directed. The pace of the story is that of an old time apocalyptic disaster movie and there are definite references in the style to Jaws and 2001. The look of it is high class with astonishing camerawork. Maybe the negative reviews come from a desire to see more visceral action and drama. I think that this is similar to classic movies such as The Exorcist, a slow start that builds and builds. Even here though there are moments of real drama. There are clearly expensive location shoots and all are brilliantly done. I rate this show highly and congratulate the production team on their work. UPDATE: I posted the above review after watching the first three episodes and I stand by all I said. However, the subsequent five episodes all display a marked reduction in each of the elements that made the show so impressive. The photography, direction and editing all changed to become far more mundane and less engaging. The references to 2001 are still there, very obviously so and there are also clear influences from James cameron's The Abyss. The overall idea is no more silly than originally expected but the diminished quality prevents any meaningful buy-in.

Pete Versus Life (2010–2011)

The British Curb Your Enthusiasm

[10/10 · 28 April 2023]

Pete V Life is brilliant. Very funny, always engaging with first rate writing and acting. It's a comedy based on social awkwardness, much like Curb Your Enthusiasm, but takes its own path and uses ingenious and surreal plot drivers. The two commentators are fantastic and the idea of them in itself is awesome. Each set piece is shot, framed, directed, scripted and acted to the absolute best it could be. Seriously, this show is made by masters of their craft. How is it not more well known? Added to all this is the sports type profiling of each character as they appear. The writers have clearly had great fun with this element and if you don't freeze frame it you'll miss some laugh out loud moments. Congratulations to the writers, producers and actors. This is among the best comedy shows ever made. Yes. RRally.

Blue Lights (2023– )

A cover/remake of The Rookie.

[1/10 · 29 March 2023]

The concept of this show is exactly the same as the 2019 TV series The Rookie (now in season 4), which follows the story of three rookie police officers during their probationary period. One of them is a mature person who has decided to change career and become a rookie police officer. We are told the chances are that one of them won't make it. The difference is that this is set in NI whereas The Rookie is set in LA. The really astonishing thing is that, despite being a complete copy of The Rookie's concept, it isn't being mentioned anywhere. I've looked on Google and sifted through all the reviews I could find. I've read the interviews with the Blue Lights' 'creators' and there is simply no mention of it being in any way related to The Rookie, despite it being a complete rip off of that series' successful premise and format. I wonder why that is.

The Kominsky Method (2018–2021)

As good as it gets

[10/10 · 26 March 2023]

Just beautiful and fantastic; while being real and down to earth. You want to watch, you want to hear what they say next. Sublime performances from everyone. This is what happens when actors are given the script and direction. You get to see the script and the direction. Performed to perfection. It's Michael Douglas' best ever work. He is really great. But so is everybody else. Alan Arkin has never been less than great so here he is again. Michael Douglas though; wow. He teaches a class in how to act as part of the show. Well, here's how it's done. I loved every minute of this beautiful show. So funny and engaging. A page turner if it was a novel. You want to see what happens next while you're laughing or wiping a tear. Masterful production and direction. Congratulations to all involved. Brilliant.

Everything Everywhere All at Once (2022)

Michelle Yeoh's worst movie.

[1/10 · 19 March 2023]

This film is poor in every respect. The script, the direction, the pace, the story, the effects and yes, even the acting. It can only be the product of hyping as it is so bad. It makes The Samaritan look like a good movie, that's how terrible it is. Imagine getting two greats such as Michelle Yeoh and Jamie lee Curtis and putting them in a stupid and juvenile school play that gets made up as it goes along. I would give this waste of time zero stars if I could. Read the other reviews before you subject yourself to this idiotic marketing manipulation otherwise you risk feeling embarrassed for having sat through it.

Clarkson's Farm (2021– )

Fun series with first rate direction, cinematography and editing.

[10/10 · 15 February 2023]

Like others, I loved the first series. Series 2 is also captivating, fun, plot-based and well-paced. Beautifully photographed and very cleverly edited. Just great to watch and see it all unfold before your eyes. It's like the David Attenborough team were tasked with making a Top Gear episode. Couldn't be better in my opinion. A great piece of TV. You have to accept that it's been scripted but once you do you're glad you did. What else can you watch right now that is as engaging and lovingly made as this. It's a money spinner for sure but it has real heart. I, for one, am already looking forward to season 3.

The Rig (2023– )

Dr Who type stupidity.

[1/10 · 12 January 2023]

Childish scripting, plot and dialogue. Borrowing from Alien, The Abyss and The Thing this has nothing like the scripting, dialogue, plot structure or production value of those movies that it has attempted to imitate. It is very poor indeed. Stupid ideas, premises and scenes where you just say 'well that would never happen'. In the film Aliens, for example, the protagonists find themselves in a truly alien environment, changed beyond all recognition into a dark place that you don't want to be. In The Rig, the protagonists find themselves inside a shipping container draped with plastic ivy. The premise, plot, script, dialogue and everything else about this pointless show is substandard and the creators should be barred from working in the creative industries. Not to mention the wokeness. Holy Scott, the wokeness is stinking in this one. I can't be bothered to explain but if you watch it, despite these warnings, you will puke from the wokery.

Detectorists (2014–2022)

Lovely and gentle British summer comedy.

[10/10 · 26 December 2022]

Everything about this show is great. The writing, acting, script, photography and plot. Just wonderful. The 2022 xmas special isn't as good though it retains most of the series' charms. The plot of it is lost a bit with the clay cup and the middle-eastern looking medieval England. What's with that? The paintings from the time don't look like that. And the significance and 'truth' of the find is not really clear. Anyway, it's still good but the themes drift a bit compared to the main series episodes. A recommended watch nonetheless as an addendum to the series. The two leads are as good as ever and the world they've created deserves to be continued.

The Spy Who Dumped Me (2018)

Great action and fight scenes, plot OK

[7/10 · 8 April 2022]

It's like Dumb and Dumber, if it was directed by Jackie Chan. The fight scenes are really first class, as are all the action scenes. The two female leads are OK and get better as it goes. Some of the dialog is good and some is not so good. The movie is worth a watch and there's nothing bad about it. Entertaining throughout, if predictable, but fun at all times. I would recommend it as a way to chill with a beer or wine; something for everyone. The scary gymnast lady is excellent and the inventive sets, locations and set pieces are well worth it. Compliments to the director and especially to the action choreography which is equal to Bond movie realisation. All in all, a lot better than I was expecting from a 'chick flick', haha. Well done to those who made this.

Young Rock (2021–2023)

Smart writing and brilliant acting.

[10/10 · 17 December 2021]

This is one of the best shows on TV. Very clever writing and directing, along with first rate delivery from the ensemble cast make every scene top notch. I can only assume that the bad reviews are from people for whom the script and the premise went over their heads. I would compare it with some of the best scripted TV comedy shows such as Arrested Development. It's endlessly inventive and observant. I watched the whole thing and wished for more, then along came the Christmas specials. The first one is immediately awesome as the rock enters, dressed as Tiny Tim from Dickens' A Christmas Carol. He's limping with the aid of a crutch that resembles an assault rifle. "Who are you"? The kids ask. "Big Tim" he answers.

Later, he recalls a brawl in a Santa grotto in a mall where an elf is beaten with a giant candy cane. He likens the tale to a similar, real-life candy cane beating at the Mercedes Megadrome and justifies it by saying: "write what you know".

It is just brilliant. Get it watched!

It's a Sin (2021)

Not as good as Girls

[4/10 · 1 October 2021]

I enjoyed this mini series as it was well-directed and competently acted. The story line was also good, if a bit soapy. It was revealing about the timeline of the AIDS pandemic and included many of the necessary societal issues such as chief constables referring to cess-pits etc.

Neil Patrick Harris is excellent, as is Stephen Fry. Callum Scott Howells makes a very impressive debut, reminiscent of a young Derek Jacobi.

The end was a bit of a shock though (spoiler alert). Who knew that all of the deaths were not the fault of sexual transmission but instead were the fault of parents not giving enough love to their gay offspring. This lack of love and acceptance is what led them to contract and infect the 38 million that died!

Jill tells it straight to the main character's mother at the end. She should have recognised his gayness and that would have saved lives. Who knows if this is really true? Only time will tell. Or something.

Code 404 (2020–2022)

Loads better than you'd think.

[8/10 · 22 September 2021]

Good writing and great performances. Engaging and funny. Definitely not dumb. Recommended to anyone who likes well-scripted comedy, such as Misfits.

The War of the Worlds (2019)

Poldark meets Dr Who.

[1/10 · 15 December 2019]

Typical BBC drama. Utterly unbelievable in every aspect. It feels like another episode of Poldark, mainly because of EVERYTHING. Then you come to the brief moments that deal with the alien invasion. They are Dr Who. Cheesy effects, stupid concepts of space travel, such as arriving overnight from Mars despite it being 250 million miles away. Just rubbish. Poor in imagination ad realisation and, worse than this, it was all about the BBC's political agenda (surprise, surprise). The astronomer, played by Robert Carlyle, is gay. The main story used to be about Martians invading earth but now is about social attitudes to divorce and adultery. There's even reference to non-acceptance of different culture. In addition to this is the fact that it is scheidt.

Transcendence (I) (2014)

Dumb and boring

[1/10 · 8 February 2015]

How does such garbage get made? The world's most powerful supercomputer being knocked together by a guy with a soldering iron. The smartest guy in the world building a Faraday cage that any schoolchild knows would not work. And the terrible script and lack of plot. Nothing happens. It's so dull that half way through they started firing artillery at some radio antennae to liven it up but it just looked stupid. Johnny Depp had to make do with big hair and glasses as even he could see that this was one role that could not possibly justify makeup and a hat of any description. The concession to this fetish was to have a scene or two of him with electrodes where his hat might normally be expected. What a waste of time and electricity. I superfast forwarded through the last 45 minutes and even then the pace was too slow. Just think what else you could be watching before you commit your precious time to this level of stupidity.

Showdown of the Unbeatables (2014– )

Fake result?

[5/10 · 23 June 2014]

I like these kind of shows but the Acoustiblok versus the air horn had what looked like a fake outcome. The guy had to choose which cable to cut and he had only three of the letters which were **ACH. Only one label, 'PEACH' matched that but he chose the label BILGE. It doesn't end in ACH. Also, he had all the other words and only the choice word had letters missing. What's going on here? i can't believe they broadcast it like that. It's a Mythbusters type of show and you expect it to be based on reason and science but you expect that there'll be edits for entertainments sake and also padding (lots of padding) with the same thing being shown over and over. To see something like this where everyone present must have know that there was only one choice and that the wrong one was chosen, yet make no comment, is too unbelievable and make you question the whole programme's ethics.

Paranormal Activity (2007)

Don't see it.

[2/10 · 14 November 2010]

This movie has no scare factor whatsoever. I'd suggest changing the tagline from "don't see it alone" to "don't see it at all". Unlike Blair Witch it just isn't scary or tense or suspenseful. The idea of a demon is laughable anyway but you can suspend belief and enjoy the story if it's done well, as in The Exorcist or The Omen or the aforementioned Blair Witch Project. This had a stupid demon with the power to make doors move and things creak. That's it. Those Japanese horror films, such as The Ring or Dark water, where a scary face suddenly jumps out at you at least have that roller coaster type fun going for them. This had none of that and instead relied on a bedroom where the door had been left open during the night so that you could see the top of the stairs. This is a little bit spooky and most people, as children, would have found this scary and closed the door while they slept. What a shame this device wasn't exploited as it was the most effective atmospheric effect. To sum up, this is a way over-hyped yawn fest with no good adrenalin kicks. Don't see it. At all.

Small Time (II) (1996)

A council film

[3/10 · 15 September 2010]

The other reviews amaze me. Didn't they see the terrible wigs and hammy local college of performing arts acting. The characters appear to have been purchased as a past-their use-by date job lot from Stereotypes-R-Us. Harry Enfields scouser family, appearing on TV around the time this was made, are actually MORE believable as real people. This is partly due to the hideous legacy that is British DRAMA ACTING. From the days of Laurence Olivier right through to the BBC dramas of today there is the received wisdom of the correct way to act. The acting in this film is like watching performing arts students having their first go at trying on wigs and costumes in order to portray the poor but resilient folk of the forgotten council estate. It would appear that the script, too, was written by the council. Maybe the whole film was a council film. It certainly looked and felt like it. Like others, I enjoyed This Is England, which is the nearest Meadows has got to being a shadow of Ken Loach, and Dead Man's Shoes had some good moments (but a stupid ending). However, this, admittedly early, effort is poor and doesn't deserve the good reviews given by the few people who were brave enough to sit through the whole thing. This is not the worst ever use of a BFI grant but it is among the worst portrayals of life on a council estate that relies heavily on wigs and stereotypes.

Funny People (2009)

Excellent film

[10/10 · 14 August 2010]

I may not have bothered to review this movie but reading the vast amount of bad reviews compelled me to try and even out the one-sided perception portrayed here. If you expect an Adam Sandler comedy then you'll be shocked and surprised, as if you'd ordered a big mac only to be presented with a gourmet meal. This is an excellent piece of work with a great script and great acting. It is compelling to watch and never boring, unless you were expecting a stupid one-dimensional gagfest. I predict a cult following will develop as this movie contains uniformly terrific script and performances from an outstanding ensemble cast. There are also many impressive cameos from the great and the good of both comedy and acting worlds. If you want The Waterboy or the 40 Year Old Virgin then look elsewhere, but if you liked Knocked Up and The Good Girl you'll love this as it is smart and funny as well as engaging and highly entertaining.

Joshua (2007)

Disappointingly amateurish

[2/10 · 26 October 2009]

Admittedly, I didn't watch the whole movie. I wanted to like it but it was so poor I had to turn it off. The direction is very weak and the music is entirely inappropriate. The characters appear to have been purchased as a job-lot from StereotypesRUs and the script comes across as contrived and unnatural. The opening title sequence has really annoying music and you can't wait for it to be over. When it finally ends it feels like you stopped having your thumb hit by a hammer, but then you get Scene One. This is the most artificial first scene ever put on a screen. A domestic portrait of a family with the mother and baby, the grandparents, the uncle and the sibling at the piano, the father with the video camera. Everyone conspicuously 'acting' out the family portrait. The piano playing in the background re-inflames the nerve that the opening music had antagonized, and continues to do so. After what seems like an aeon the mother tells the kid to stop playing the piano. After this it starts again and if you don't switch it off at this point in utter fury then you're thicker skinned than I am. What an annoying load of amateur garbage. The rest of the movie may have had some redeeming features but I'll never find out because the first fifteen minutes is like having your eyes, eardrums and brain sandpapered.

Blindness (2008)

Dumb and Dumber, without the comedy

[2/10 · 2 October 2009]

I'm giving this movie a few stars because of the 'It's a parable of how people behave when confronted with... bollosck" Juliane Moore (most overrated actress in history, or anywhen else) had the power all along to solve all of their problems but she didn't. What was the point of that. Oh, then she did anyway. After all the atrocities she could've prevented. Then she took the people to her house. Walked there. This was just a load of crap. I suggest that instead of this you either watch something entertaining, or thought-provoking. This is neither. Instead, it's a boring waste of time. If you DO watch it you'll wish that you hadn't because you'll just think 'well, that was stupid. Why didn't she just do that?" Give it a miss. Very dreadful and unbelievable. Unconvincing. Stupid. Nothing worth talking about here. Move along...

Tropic Thunder (2008)

The next level

[9/10 · 26 September 2009]

This is a brilliant piece of work. A comedy/parody that actually emulates at the level of its source material. Ben Stiller has clearly done his homework and here recreates many epic battle scenes. The photography is stunning and the direction is nothing less than awesome, for the first twenty minutes or so. Although the movie loses direction a little in the second and third acts it has enough great script and sheer momentum that it never falls below excellent. This really is a stunning piece of work. Look at what else is out there. This is constantly funny but also technically brilliant and very artistic. There are no 'longeurs' and every scene moves the action forward. The performances are spectacularly good. Tom cruise still looks slightly too 'Tom Cruise' but his lines are almost perfect. As a whole his part is 1000 times better than in that defecant Magnolia. Robert Downey Jr is almost embarrassingly good. He plays Bill Cosby playing an actor in a movie, but then he slips into a stereotype of all 'our favorite' Black actors. He is challenged by the one real Black guy and this scene serves to show that he is an actor, playing an Australian actor who is trying to play a Black American. Ther are too many other outstanding features to mention, such as the child general and Jack Black's best work in years. All in all, this is not a mainstream movie. It is Something Else.