ster2001 Reviews

Fat Girl (2001)

What I learned from this film!

[2/10 · 3 August 2010]

What I learned from this film . . . . and the other films of this Director!

Words like Provocative, Controversial, Shocking when used to describe a film usually mean a film has already been made that deals with the subject that has more taste, cleverness, attention to narrative believability and character development than the Provocative Controversial and Shocking one.

Provocative, Controversial, and Shocking filmmakers can get people to watch their films by being Provocative, Controversial, and Shocking over and over again on basically the same theme.

Girls (at least in France) will start French kissing you in a public cafe within the first 2 minutes of meeting you in front of your sister if you are from Italy, cute and have limited command of French but can amazingly have 30 minute intimate conversations and then mentally rape you with their limited command of French.

Teenagers (at least in France and parts of Italy) think about sex 24 hours a day and have no other interests that would make them fully rounded human beings worth really caring about and when they actually are intimate show no compassion tenderness or enjoyment of eroticism because men always mentally rape girls and girls are really dense.

Mental Rape consists of being - conned into having Anal sex(because it's not real sex)by someone who doesn't really speak your language well- with your sister in the room. Going down on your boyfriend the next day without him even asking because you're "confused" and don't realize you've been mentally raped, but you go down on him anyway because???. Having sex on the beach, again with the sister nearby, having sex at night again with the sister in the room. Telling the girl you really love her and want to see her again and then still not really knowing you've been mentally raped because mental rape means you don't realize you're being mentally raped.

Wondering if %100 percent of civilization has been missing out by not having their sister in the room while having passionless sex.

There can be really cool scenes on highways that build up and then go nowhere.

Serial Killers can blunder out of Nowhere smash your window without your Mother waking up, kill your Sister, rip your mothers clothes and fondle her for no apparent reason before killing her and then not kill you but rape you and make you eat your own underwear but letting you live so there will be a cool freeze frame at the end that is Provocative Controversial and Shocking.

It is OK and not outrageously hypocritical for a Director seeking the "truth" to lie to a 13 year old actress by telling them their dog just died to get a performance out of them.

It is OK (in France at least) to have a 13 year old perform a brutal explicit rape scene and gag on her own underwear as its stuffed into her mouth and have it not considered pornographic but artistic because its the "truth" - by way of a dead dog that's not really dead.

It is OK to mock people even liberals! because they find a 13 year old performing a brutal explicit rape scene and gag on her own underwear as its stuffed into her mouth as pornographic and not enlightened.

It is OK to have a 13 year old perform a brutal explicit rape scene and gag on her own underwear as its stuffed into her mouth but not to actually see the finished film because they are not old enough.

There are some people who don't understand why the above is painfully ironic and will mock you for mentioning it and call you "Moral" and "you must be an American" These same people are Enlightened.

Enlightenment in the 21st century is more of a catch phrase people use when they can't explain why someone is not "Getting It" and are too busy "texting to explain further. It is not the same as Enlightenment in the age that nobody cares about anymore because it happened along time ago and they don't bother to teach it in school because they would have to cut the budget on the new Football field to pay for the classes.

It is OK and not outrageously hypocritical for a Director seeking the "truth" about the degrading aspects of sex on women as dealt by men to hire a notorious porn star who has dunked womens heads into toilets while having anal sex to act in your film because he has a big weenie.

It is OK and not outrageously hypocritical to say professional seasoned actors are all mediocre and conformists because they are too smart to agree to be in your films.

It is OK and not outrageously hypocritical to say professional seasoned actors are all mediocre and conformists because they don't look good nude or have small weenies.

Saying "All true artists are hated" is only %50 true. It won't make you an artist but it will get you hated.

It is OK for a filmmaker to have a grossly unhealthy, childishly obsessive and ugly view of human sexuality without offering any juxtaposition, contrast or thematic development of this limited theme and pass it off as Provocative, Controversial, Shocking and "truthful" over and over again while using manipulation, hypocritical views, methods and a serious lack of narrative common sense, instead of seeking some kind of therapy so they will stop making the same movies on the same subject the rest of their lives.

Twice a Judas (1968)

Kinski and the family Dog

[8/10 · 10 May 2007]

This a very good Spaghetti Western no question about it. I'm a big fan of the genre and have to admit that the bulk of these films are mediocre to bad and I put off seeking this film out due to the bad reviews posted here. Unfortunately the two comments left are totally unsympathetic to the quirks of the genre and the one review doesn't even describe the story correctly! - May you meet the blazing lead of Antonio Sabatos Elephant gun! The film is very well shot and directed and the score is fine also. Kinski gives a very good nuanced performance. He ends up being extremely evil but there is a question as to this which is carried through out the movie to very good effect, helped by Kinski's performance and the rather intelligent script and effective direction. Sabato is good as the lead and surprisingly you buy that he and Kinski could be brothers, they have similar face structure. Added pluses are some very well staged shoot outs. One in particular uses the Family dog to riotously effective uses in helping the hero roust the Bad guys. Very well done indeed and adds a touch of humor to a sombre reflective film. This scene alone is worth the price of the film even if the rest was a wash, its that good. For you aficionados catch the Dubbing work of Veteran character actor Walter Barnes, as the voice of the Sheriff. A hidden gem if you can get a copy!

The ABC Comedy Hour (1972)

Orson Welles and the copycats

[10/10 · 2 July 2006]

I remember this show fondly. Especially a show where Orson Welles was the guest host. Yes Orson Welles. I was only 8 years but I knew him as a personality not as a great director. In one skit he is the host of a mystery show, mocking his own series at the time. The show is sponsored by "Freds gas station" or something like that. He sits down and says "sit back and with a fine glass of Freds gas, enjoy" I broke up into laughter. Now I can see that he was able to mock his own persona and be funny doing it. I'll never forget that image. The show was vintage 70's skit comedy and the impersonators were the best in the business. I hope this show is brought back on DVD.

Poseidon (2006)

PLEASE PRAY FOR Hollywood

[3/10 · 13 May 2006]

Hollywood you better get your act together. Thanks you for spitting out another INSTANTLY forgettable "Blockbuster" Thank God I only paid $4 dollars to see this. Not only can't the Studios come up with original material. The material they remake is worse than the original. If this crap keeps up you will have even less of an audience. A good cast given nothing to chew on and a Director who has made great films and this is what we get? 150 million and the Ballroom set in the original was more impressive?

Video games are so prevalent in society that I fear their mind numbing influence is starting to permeate even NON video game derived movies. The original movie was a good solid, involving movie. This remake takes every element of the original and removes what made it involving. I mean EVERY element. There are people out there making these decisions!! And they are paid huge sums to make these decisions! With the talent in front of and behind the camera this is truly frightening as this seems to be the norm at the present.

Right from the start there is almost NO set up. We don't know where the ship is, where it is sailing, even what ocean it's on! Things that actually would create some atmosphere like the originals speech by the Captain explaining the origin of Poseidon. Greek God of the Sea. They are sailing on the Mediterranean, to Greece? Get it? Cheesy but involving. You know it gives the proceedings some gravatis, some mystery. In the remake we get nothing, we are are in Video game land, we don't have time for such things.

Even the cause for the disaster has absolutely no set up. Happy new year, bang, the tidal wave hits. Unlike the originals slow build up, as it explained WHAT WAS HAPPENING AND WHY! Even the effects in the original worked better. They were simpler but executed as a whole created more of an impact because of the tension that was built up. Again a sense of gravity, HUMAN INVOLVEMENT and Atmosphere! Even in the original, Leslie Nielsen's corny grimace as the wave engulfs the ship. It's goofy but you REMEMBER IT. You know a character we identify with reacting to the impending disaster. It's a very basic cinematic technique. But I guess todays more "sophisticated" audience don't need this kind of thing anymore.

There is no human involvement in the wave hitting in this remake. The Captain isn't called to the bridge, no build up, just some crew members we've had no contact with running around. Absolutely unmemorable. The effects are impressive but who cares, I'm not given anything to latch on to.

Straight across the board EVERY situation is diminished from the original. The scene chewing conflict between Gene Hackaman and Ernest Borgnine is totally lost in the remake. There is NO conflict with the characters. NONE! It's just one disaster to overcome to the next. You know , like a VIDEO GAME.

Even the self sacrificing Shelly Winters death swim has almost no emotional impact because the character doesn't return and die in front of everybody. Like DUH! Hey screen writers perhaps you should learn of something called ELEMENTS OF DRAMA!! Even if you have no talent you could at least COPY the original, not make it worse! Absolutely mind boggling!! If you WANTED to sabotage the original you couldn't have done a better job. UNREAL! All you film lovers just keep repeating "Things will get better" Repeat it like a prayer.

Night of the Devils (1972)

Obscure gem

[9/10 · 3 August 2005]

It's always nice to find an obscure gem like this. This film is VERY good. Don't let the other reviews here fool you. An intelligent viewer who actually WATCHES and takes in all the atmosphere built up will find a lot to reward them. One should not go into this with the typical 2 second attention span so prevalent today. The film is intelligently made and builds slowly but surely. You have to take this as an Italian horror movie from the 70's to appreciate. All the conventions of this style of film-making are present. The weird dubbing zooms and creepy vocal music are all their and are very effective in creating the proper Euro Horror feel. The director Ferroni was very competent in this genre. It starts off with a bang of weird gore and settles into a slowly building story with a Wizz bang finale, with some of the most off the wall goofines I have ever seen in one of these types of films. It is Definitely worth the wait for the gore and mayhem at the end. The Vurdalak(witch/Vampire) theme is an underdone sub genre and is quite different than the usual Vampire conventions. The very foreign Yugoslavian setting is also a plus.

Gianni Garko is quite effective as the lead and has the requisite chemistry to pull off his central role. He also creates sympathy which helps make this better than the average Italian gore movie. The children are also REALLY creepy and effective. Special kudos to Carlo Rambaldi(ET) for his effective 70's gore effects. This is available form Midnight Video in a Good quality widescreen transfer with slightly annoying Japanese subs. If you are a fan of atmospheric Euro horror this is a must have. A proper DVD release in the Future? I hope so.

For a Few Dollars More (1965)

Van Cleefs shining moment

[9/10 · 27 January 2005]

I really like Clint Eastwood but this is really Lee Van Cleef's film. From the moment you see him on the train to the final gunfight his performance is faultless. I think this is even better than GBU in many respects. The smaller more personal vendetta has real human emotion to it. Van Cleef and Eastwoods tenuous bond is another highlight. Leones direction is again brilliant in the detail it brings to situations. What other film has Lee Van Cleef, Clint Eastwood and Klaus Kinski in the same scene!! Morricone delivers another fantastic score. The final duel with the musical watch is sheer magic. Glad this finally made into the top 250.

The Hard Way (1980 TV Movie)

Very Good minimalist Noir

[9/10 · 21 October 2004]

What's the deal with the ratings here? Hardly anyone voted below 4 and its got a 3.6??? This is a very well made low budget minimalist neo noir set in Ireland. McGoohan and Van Cleef are very effective in their roles as underworld hit men. Sparse dialouge and good cinematography. Direction is slow but assured and suits the tone of the story well. Has the production feel of those late seventies British thillers like "Mystery" that played over here in the sates. But this has a dark tragic tone that separates it from those TV shows. Who would have thought you'd see Lee Van Cleef in an Irish Film Noir. Definitely worth a look if you can find this ultra rare flick.

The Price of Power (1969)

Top 20 Spaghetti

[8/10 · 6 October 2004]

Out of the 600 or so Spaghetti Westerns made this has got to be in the top twenty somewhere. Can not believe this hasn't received any reviews! Gemma is excellent in this. Van Johnson is good too though his dubbed voice is a little off killter but that's the charm of the Italian style. Beautiful photography and some excellently staged action. All the supporting characters are well played. The severity of the racist streak in the bad guys is pretty tough even by todays standards which creates an emotional depth to Gemmas character in some of the situations that take place. Absolutely FANTASTIC score by Luis Bacalov. See this is in the wonderful Wide screen DVD from Japan. A spaghetti must have.

The Terminal (2004)

Good Spielberg

[10/10 · 11 September 2004]

This is Spielberg when he is good, which kicks the ass of most people working in Hollywood today at their best. Just like the saying that even bad Hitchcock is better than most other's best. I am amazed how people just can't relax and enjoy a decent film these days, judging by the reviews here. There is nothing in this film that is less than good. The acting is excellent and Spielberg's direction is effortless and undistracting. Except for a few over the top transitions and cuts the flow and blocking of scenes is the very definition of understated excellence. Can't anyone appreciate this anymore because it is in fact quite rare. Very few Directors have this much assurance in technique and it should be savored. Instead of going out of his way to show us how visually good he is, he can just relax and let his talent shine without making a big deal out of it. It's a pleasure to watch just for that alone.

Bite the Bullet (1975)

First rate western

[10/10 · 8 September 2004]

First rate western with an excellent cast, excellent direction and dialog. I kept reading these reviews with people objecting to the violence against animals in the film. It is showing a period in time and the attitudes from that time. It illuminates the human character just like any other good drama. The fact that it's brutal does not make it a bad film, only a true film. The film making of Richard Brooks here is the very definition of economy. Nothing is wasted and the lines crackle with realistic western wit. The scene with Ben Johnson and Hackman at the river is absolutely brilliant in its depth of humanity and economy of expression. Definitely one of the best of the 70's westerns.

The Magnificent Seven Ride! (1972)

Van Cleef gets the Girl!

[10/10 · 4 August 2004]

If you like Lee Van Cleef you must have this film now on DVD in an excellent transfer. Yes this looks like a TV Movie. Yes the plot has been done a million times etc. But it DOES have an excellent performance by Van Cleef playing Chris. On the plus side - Some TV movies are pretty damn good! This is a solid western in all departments with good acting all around. It's almost a Whose who of 70's character actors- James Sikking, Ed Lauter, faces you've seen all the time and a young Gary Busey. The dialog is pretty brilliant at times(scene with Chris and the Monk is a hoot) and is never less than good. Stand out scenes for me were when Chris and the writer find his dead wife. Van cleef underplays fantastically and it is genuinely touching and simply done. Also his "love scene" - Stephanie Powers looks stunning and Van Cleef absolutely Oozes restrained machismo. It's a moment of simple affection portrayed spot on by both actors. If you want to know what "screen presence" means check this scene out. These two scenes alone are worth the price of the movie. If you're a fan of IL "Angel Eyes" this is a must have.

Bowling for Columbine (2002)

Major funding from Canada?

[5/10 · 27 July 2004]

I watched this for the first time and pretty much like it. But something kept nagging at me. I am a pretty liberal person and believe in Gun control but I really have always liked Charlton Heston and couldn't believe he was as bad as he's portrayed here. So I did a little research and found out that his speech was so horribly butchered by Moore that he totally changed the meaning Heston was going for. Also Moore inserted a shot of Heston waving a gun over his head that was taped at a NRA function a year later in some other location and then cut in so it looked like it was part of his speech in Denver after the Columbine shooting. Moore never mentions that the meeting was planned way before the Columbine shooting and couldn't be canceled realistically in that short period of time.

Other things found out. The Footage of the Dog with the gun is faked. The bank at the beginning mailed the guns to customers from a warehouse 400 miles away. They didn't hand them out in the bank the way its portrayed and the guns in the bank were models. The Foreign death statistics don't take into account police shootings(the US figures do) and they are not adjusted for the differences in population and a few of them he took the lowest death toll in a given period instead of an average???

The scene with Dick Clark was another one that I just couldn't believe. Is he really that rotten? Turns out the the six year old's mother had lost custody of all her kids and was a convicted drug dealer. She had three children all from different father's and her son was not in her custody and living with a drug dealing uncle in a crack house with guns and Knives all over the place. Moore conveniently leaves all this out and tries to make Dick Clark the bad guy for employing the kids mother at minimum wage. When Moore approaches Clark he does it at the worst possible time. Why? because Moore WANTS Clark to get angry and close the door in his face. I'd shut the door in his face too. What's going on here? The list goes on and on and I'll leave it up to the inquisitive viewer to do a little research into how this films was made as almost all of the major points Moore is trying to make have been altered or major points left out to get his personal view across. And what's with Canada being portrayed as something almost bordering on Utopia? Did Moore ever mention that the film got major funding from Canadian government money through a Canadian production company!! And I have friends in Canada and they LOCK the doors!

I agree with what Moore is setting out to do but the film really never draws any conclusions and his tactics are not in line with what's considered Non-fiction. I almost felt Moore's tactics were as disturbing as the subject matter. When you have to distort the truth to such an extent and not even realize or admit to it, based on the way Moore defends everything in the film as the truth, is a very disturbing trend. This film has a tremendous power to influence people and they should really know the whole truth not Michael Moore's truth. Anything else truly is "fiction"

Cemetery Without Crosses (1969)

One of the best Spaghetti Westerns

[10/10 · 3 June 2004]

After finally seeing this in a very good print I believe it to be one of the best of the non Leone Spaghettis. It's a shame that a lot of these forgotten westerns are only available in multi generation copys because it really affects ones perception. I originally saw this in a VHS dub that was just a shade above unwatchable. What a difference a clear picture and sound track makes. Vintage 60's Spaghetti music and cynical noir like script. Very simple, nothing "spectacular" but everything works and it moves at a good clip. Good cast with the French leads and some Spaghetti regulars. The scene where Hossein plays the music box while brushing up on his shooting skill is a high point. Every spaghetti fan should check this out. Only available in a Japanese import. Great stuff.

Hercules (1983)

GRADE A ITALIAN EUROTRASH

[1/10 · 2 June 2004]

This movie is bad, really bad! I remember this when it first came out and saw it twice. Grade triple Z special effects, bad dubbed voices and LOU FERRIGNO! After the ten minute intro which totally rewrites Greek mythology (Pandora's Jar?) and mercifully explains only three of the nine planets formation, the fun starts. This film is more entertaining than the slick stuff coming out of Hollywood today. If you love bad movies this is a must see. Great outfits on the girls, paper mache sets and I can just see the special effects guys standing just out of frame with their bottles of lighter fluid when the "awesome" miniature sets go up in flames. Give this a 1 vote and get it into the bottom 100! Eurotrash film-making doesn't get any better than this!

A Noose Is Waiting for You Trinity (1972)

Another Spaghetti saved by Kinski and Morricone

[10/10 · 1 May 2004]

This was a hoot. Though I must say Kinski and Morricone saved this from total mediocrity. The plot is atypical spaghetti. It's more of a shane stoyline with a bounty hunter(Kinski) after shane as an added perk to the plot. George Martin is pretty good though and the baddies are really bad. Yes there is bad dubbing unintentionally funny lines and everything you expect from the genre but Morricone's harmonica theme is genuinely touching and raises the film everytime it underscores a scene, especially effective at the end. This movie would work without it but it would be nothing special.

As for Kinski. This is unquestionably one of his best roles in a western. Everytime he's on screen is pure magic, even with the dubbing. And the ending to the movie is quite touching though it wouldn't be half as good without the actions of . . . who else KINSKI!! There is a German PAL dvd of this film. It's hard to find but if you do grab it.

Kill Bill: Vol. 2 (2004)

Where's Lee van Cleef??

[4/10 · 17 April 2004]

As neither a rabid fan or a detractor of Tarantino I must say I enjoyed the first vol. better simply because the action propelled the story and didn't give you much time to think about how thin the plot was. And there really isn't much here to make you care about any of these characters. The scene with the killer and the home pregnancy test where we're supposed to care about the bride fell totally flat.

I'm sure this film is going to get TONS of positive reviews simply because Tarantino is one of the only original filmmakers able to command big budget films these days and fans will fawn over anything he does because there is no else to fawn over. But it seems people only respond to action and kinetics in films and not on plots and characters, which is sad because it is possible to combine both and Tarantino has the talent to do it if he'd only grow up a little. This is a lot of fun but it's not a masterpiece in any sense.

Carradine is great and so is Michael Parks with a superlative job doing a Mexican pimp. Also If you're going to use music from other films take it from obscure films. The music used from the Good the Bad and the Ugly(it's in the top 100 best movies on imdb for christ sake!) is so recognizable its almost blatant plagerism to use it. I was expecting to see Lee van Cleef ride out of the desert and Kill Bill. Now that would be something!

The Ruthless Four (1968)

Very Good Spaghetti

[10/10 · 24 January 2004]

So many of these Spaghetti westerns were made I wonder how many lost gems there might be that will never be seen again. This one is out of print but there are a few VHS still floating around.

This one has the benefit of a really tight script and excellent cast. Two old time hollywood veterans Van Heflin and Gilbert Roland. And two spaghetti stars Klaus Kinski and George Hilton. All are on top form but its Heflins movie and he turns in a good performance. Direction is assured and inventive. Exceptionally good shoot out in the middle at the mission. Kinski is also effective as a sunglass wearing killer dressed as a preacher, who may have a homosexual relationship with Hilton. It seems hinted at. Watch and decide for Yourself!

Today We Kill, Tomorrow We Die! (1968)

Best western death scene ever!

[10/10 · 20 January 2004]

This was pretty decent most of the way through but the last 10 minutes are really superb. Getting Tetsuya Nakadai(the great Japanese star) to play the villan was a brilliant idea. His strained facial gestures are hilariously brilliant. He really raises the movie. He even wields a giant machette like a samurai sword in a few scenes! I suppose he's playing a mexican? It is never explained but it doesn't really matter. Good cast all around. Some inventive scenes but the end shoot out is great. Nakadai's facial expression are fantastic as he almost freezes in place after being shot. And the score which was rather functional takes on an inspired tone as the villan dies, which takes a scene chewingly long time. Hats off to Nakadai for raising this above average.

Manos: The Hands of Fate (1966)

Keep this at #1!!

[1/10 · 15 January 2004]

There is a lot of debate about what makes a movie truly, so bad its good. There are so many it's hard to choose sometimes. When I first saw this films opening credits, with its Shriley Basey like lounge song over the opening credits(its supposed to be a horror movie)I knew that this was going to be hard to beat. Everything about it is poorly executed, acting, camera, lighting, editing, and music(a saxophone piano and drum trio!!!). Not only are they bad they transcend themselves(ei: the sax theme for Torgo). Even films like "Beast of yucca flats" have some professional crew people(the film is in focus, for example) Manos is a totally unique film and deserves to be at the rock bottom for as long as film are made and viewed. I know it sounds cruel but it's a compliment really. Everyone who loves bad movies should get online and keep this film right at number 1.

Death Rides a Horse (1967)

Piano Player. Three notes!

[10/10 · 8 January 2004]

This is without question one of the best Spaghetti westerns. Where is a decent print of this movie? The print quality form the ones for sale on DVD are atrocious! I had to borrow a decent vhs taped off AMC to see how it should really look. Lee van Cleef is superb, one of his best jobs after "For a few dollars more" Also fantastic score by Morricone, almost avant garde in some spots. Great one liners abound and special kudos to veteran bad guy Anthony Dawson for the most histrionic death scene ever, which is preceeded by three overly dramatized notes on the piano. And the ending manages to be quite touching. Brilliant!!

The Great Silence (1968)

Absolute Evil

[22 November 2003]

Absolutely fantastic Spaghetti western from Corbucci. Klaus Kinski gives one of his best performances(even though he's dubbed). I wonder if he thought this was one of the tons of bad movies he admits to doing for the money. Either way he creates a character that is the personification of human evil, which manifests itself at the end of the picture. Totally pessimistic with a convention breaking finale that is both beautiful and incredibly sad. If you end up hating the movie the ending will no doubt have an effect. Even with the clunky dubbing the actors are all fine. I've watched it twice and have picked up details I missed. The script is very detailed visually and also in the character development. Morricone's score is very effective. Try to find this on dvd. I bought one from Brazil. The US version is no longer available. If you find one one you won't be disappointed.

Sabata (1969)

Van Cleef Rules!

[10/10 · 28 September 2003]

I tried for a long time to get this film on a good dvd (a japanese boxed set that is now out of print). I love spaghetti westerns and this is one of the best after the Leone films. Very toungue in cheek but still fun and action packed. I can't believe this isn't readily available, not even on VHS. Lee van Cleef was excellent. I wish there were stars like him around today but it seems he's part of an era that is gone forever. Dig those Zoom shots!!

The Master of Disguise (2002)

Jaws scene worth price of admission!!

[12 August 2002]

This was a terrible movie. I saw it to see how bad it would be but it didnt quite become inept enough to be "so bad it's Good". I didnt laugh once(Chuckled at Turtle Man though) until Carvey did this impersonation of Robert Shaw as Quint in Jaws to outsmart some dumb hoods. Laughter erupted out of me I couldn't believe how stupid and funny it was at the same time. Can't believe nobody else commented on this? Most people had probably walked out by this time. they should have stayed. The scene was worth the price of admission.