Change Your Image
ncriggar
Reviews
It's Pat: The Movie (1994)
A misunderstood comedy
This is definitely one of the most misunderstood comedies of all time. I believe that people wen't into the theater with the intention of laughing their behinds off. I know I did, I mean after all, this was a great skit on "Saturday Night Live" wasn't it? Unfortunately the answer is that it wasn't a funny enough skit on SNL to actually be considered reasonably for use as a full-length feature. Therefore, I must re-state that this film is just totally misunderstood as a comedy film... Probably because it is single-handedly the most mortifying horror movie of all time. Never have I been so scared, so afraid, so frozen in fear. Watch this one, and you'll scream what I did at the top of my lungs during the climax scene: "GOD HELP US ALL!!!!!" 2 out of 10 stars.
The Final Sacrifice (1990)
They don't get any greater
This movie is a wonderful exploration of different art-forms, such as cinematography, and special visual effects. Jim Stacy delivers a wonderfully "lensed" film, in what is probably the finest cinematography credit of his career. The visual effects produced by Phil Letourneau, could be the finest he has ever done as well. Bruce Mitchell delivers an award-deserving performance as the believable, yet unpredictable Zap Rowsdower. The plot is relevant and highly believable, while maintaining it's fantasy charms. Flying Dutchman Productions made a daring decision, choosing to release the film in Monaural audio. Although some have told me they would like to see a 15th anniversary re-release that is remastered in THX certified digital surround sound. See this film, and judge for yourself, although I think you'll agree, that digitizing can't make a film that is already of this quality any better.
Kudos to director Tjardus Greidanus, you couldn't have made a better film.
The bottom line: This movie will make you laugh, it will make you cry, and the ending will keep you guessing.
That was easily the finest stream of horse garbage I have ever typed...
"This film is the ultimately worst film of all time. It shares this distinction with absolutely no other films. Bar none, no holds barred, no filmed overlooked, this is the worst, and any opposition to this opinion, to this notion will not be acceptable as a form of logical, reasonable, or understandable argument."
Sincerely
Nick Criggar
My Rating: 1/10
(To the IMDb editors: Please allow access to a new rating: 0 (God Awful) for this film only, as it is the only film that has or ever will have truly earned it.)
The Matrix Revolutions (2003)
An incredible end from such humble beginnings
It is nearly impossible to instantly classify The Matrilogy in certain terms: (Action, Drama, Comedy, etcetera). However, it is very easy to classify This Trilogy in a few ways. First off, to all of those who had star-bound minds after "A New Hope" came out, or to every nerd who has ever gone to a convention hoping to have Harrison Ford sign a glossy, The Matrix Trilogy is "The Holy Trilogy" of our generation. You must concede this. This film also actually crushes its two predecessors. "Revolutions" is extravagant with its CGI and visual effects, which topple any digital visualizations in the first two films. The incredible Battle on the Dock of Zion makes Gettysburg look like a knick from a Bic razor. It is absolutely wonderful to see a film with such a gripping and nail-biting war-scene, especially since said film is not conceptually based off of military scenes, but rather deep metaphysical philosophy. The acting has transgressed its falseness from the first two films, (think Reeves saying: "I know kung-fu" with a confused visage). The Wachowski brothers also made a very wise decision to move towards a score-oriented work from a soundtrack-oriented work (I love Rob Zombie, but he just wouldn't have worked for much of the music in this film). Well choreographed fighting (a Matrix staple) is abundant throughout, although it is even more dynamically integrated to the CGI in this film. What else can I say about it from a technical aspect (except that Film Buffs will study this one for decades to come). This brings me finally to the philosophy of The Matrix. You can be sure that university philosophy programs will begin to offer these courses again just as they did after the first film came out in 1999. They definitely should, considering the deepness and complexity of this film. (We are not just talking Plato any longer, we are talking Plato, Schopenhauer, Sartre, Hume, and even some Aquinas). It is philosophy-chowder that results in an encrypted but powerful message. TO ANY POTENTIAL VIEWER: Here are three options to think of before watching this film --- 1) I want to watch a film with audio visual properties so incredible that the film knocks my socks and under-roos off --- 2) I want to watch an incredibly philosophical film that forces me to think until my brain hurts --- 3) one plus two. The choice is yours... 9/10!