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Thanksgiving (2023)
Fumbled at the Finish Line.
Straight to the chase; Thanksgiving is a really fun and entertaining film, until it reaches the end. I'm unsure if there was an issue when shooting or what, but the film reaches its peak when we enter the "Dinner" scene. This is its big moment and it's amazing. The concept of the scenario, the motives and the methods to it are really original and so entertaining. However, this scene suddenly ends abruptly and cuts to a completely different, hardly fitting scene, where the films reveal and climax are unsatisfyingly rushed to the credits. It honestly feels like the result of a production issue. It kills the movie by the end.
Prior to the finale, the film slowly builds to the aforementioned "Dinner" scene, each kill getting more interesting and cleverly displaying more and more of the killers prowess, which is utilised well for the most part. Their isn't much of a mystery to be had here, but the film does what it's good at so well that you somewhat forget that while watching. That is, like I said, until the end.
Aside from the finale, this films other greatest weakness is its main character, Jess I believe her name is. Jess is a nothing character, through and through. She is uninteresting, does nothing of note yet remains a key part of the plot, which means you never fear for her safety. She drags down scenes she's in and sucks tension out of action scenes featuring her. Effort was clearly put into the cast of characters, but it's confusing how they ended up neglecting their protagonist.
For the majority, Thanksgiving is entertaining and the gore is awesome. But as a whole, the films issues do ruin it in all honesty. When it comes to slashers, there are three critical elements that need to be nailed to succeed. Those being the Protagonist, Killer and Finale. Thanksgiving had a nothing protagonist, an amazing and super unique killer, and a truly terrible ending.
I watched this film with my housemates at university, as I do with most horror films. We were buzzing leading up to the finale, and it sucked to see the life and energy leave the room as this film came to a close.
Have a good one.
The Beekeeper (2024)
10/10 Poster
I just want to start off by acknowledging how amazing the poster is for this film. It's genuinely perfect. Whoever the artist is that did this is a master of the craft.
The Beekeeper at its core is an action set piece, with some commentary sprinkled in to give it some depth. In fact, I cannot think of another film other than this that tackles the issues elderly people face concerning online scams and theft. I know there must be films that have, but it was actually refreshing to be hearing commentary on an issue that hasn't been done to death by 2024.
This film is solid in what it wants to do. It knows the audience is there to see Jason Statham being a badass in some way, so it gives just that, with Statham being a former operative for a secret government assassination program, known as the Beekeepers. Without going into it too much, the film covers this premise fully and is satisfying in how it explores the idea. It's nothing groundbreaking, but it supplements the simple story with awesome one man army action.
A beautiful film to look at, with Statham killing it and Jeremy Irons being a legend as usual, I don't see this film not being enjoyable for most. It's not asking for too much investment from the audience, just enough to have fun with it. A true popcorn movie.
While it might have a few iffy things here and there, what it does do right is where the fun is, so I'll leave it at that and recommend anyone who enjoys action, Statham and or Irons to see it.
Have a good one.
Five Nights at Freddy's (2023)
AN ULTIMATE MISSED OPPORTUNITY
I just want to start by explaining what I mean when I say that this film is arguably one of the biggest missed opportunities in modern horror cinema.
FNAF effectively defined millennial and gen z video game horror in the 2010s. It dominated a decade with one long lore driven cannon that to this day entices and fascinates, for good reason. The depth and attention to detail Scott put into this world he created is ground breaking.
FNAF the movie was something that would come out as an instant horror classic and a serious contribution to the genre entirely. With no right being poor in quality given the source material Scott made.
I learnt something when I watched this film for the first time, something seriously important to me as an aspiring writer and director.
It is often demanded by fan bases that original creators or creatives be brought onto adaptive projects to maintain not only the legitimacy of the adaptation, but also the expected quality. Scott Cawthon wrote the screenplay for the FNAF movie. Which doesn't even come into the same realm as the games he once created. This movie got me thinking that even a story's creator can lose touch and sight of what made his work beloved in the beginning. I'm not saying that's exactly what happened here. But this film brought me to the realisation that it's entirely possible.
I have already said a lot so I'll just say that the FNAF movie is just a spooky movie, nothing more nothing less. It's a fast food horror movie, bringing nothing new in the shadow of the games it's based on. The simplicity that gave the original games their one of a kind tone and atmosphere, is entirely absent here. The film complicates and over explains source material that was perfect the first time it was made.
All this film had to do was retell the games in a movie format. Keep it accurate to the games and don't stray unnecessarily. With that I don't doubt we would have had the next iconic horror franchise in film. That could have gone on to define the 2020s, just as the games did for the 2010s. However, what we got was a standard nothing movie that will fall out of relevance alongside most generic horror. In a manor very similar to the Scream franchise which I hold close to my heart.
Looking back at the games and the impact they had coupled with the fan base they have established since. Compare that to what this film gave us. Dont tell yourself that it isn't a opportunity wasted.
Have a good one.
Prey (2022)
WASTED OPPORTUNITY
Prey is arguably the greatest waste of film opportunity, in recent memory. The idea of a Predator encountering a prior human civilisation has been a universally dreamed of concept for any fan of the franchise or it's source material, for decades. What could be done, in the right hands, with this set up is destined to be legendary. This film is a shot and far miss that might ensure we don't ever see a good portrayal of this idea on screen ever.
Prey misunderstood what made the Predator such a legendary opponent for humans in films. Pitting a tribe of people with sticks and rocks against a Predator, and having them win is unfortunately what this film does and it's as painful to endure as you would imagine. An alien so dangerous, that even the most lethal group of soldiers in the world, could barley overcome it. Prey wants you to forget this, so that they can suggest a scenario in which humans with no technology or infrastructure defeat a Predator with relative ease.
The curiosity from fans to see a Predator fighting with past civilisations comes with the knowledge that, based on what we know, we wouldn't stand a chance. A concept so good it couldn't possibly be bad. Prey found a way to do just that.
To see how much of a failure this film is, beyond just watching it. Look no further than the original 1988 film. That film glorifies human brawn and manliness. Showing in its opening half how effective that power is against other humans. However, when it comes to facing the Predator, all the brawn and power couldn't take it down. Defeating the Predator came down to intellect, strategy and force of will. The only aspects of combat a human can match a Predator successfully. With the brawn and might accenting the new change in approach to fighting the alien. Strength and numbers proved useless, thus smarts and strategy came in as humanity's win condition. Prey ignores this and has the Predator lose to all the things I just stated we know it won't lose to, against a more advanced and dangerous group of humans on top of that. You are asked to believe that a small woman who lives in the wild, faired better than a giant military man with all the combat experience in the world. It insults your intelligence. Intentionally or not.
This film should have been a dream brought to life. Instead it feels like an attempt to put an unwelcome personal stamp on the franchise.
No disrespect to those involved in the film. But this film should be skipped by anyone who enjoys Predator, for the sake of this epic franchise.
The Hunt for Red October (1990)
DYNAMITE CLASSIC
Hunt for Red October is no stranger to anyone who likes Sean Connery, for good reason. The ENTIRE cast of the film are spot on. Sean Connery in particular however is given centre stage at key points in the film. When he isn't needed he is in the background, but when he is needed, he brings 110%. He's smashing in this.
Aside from Connery and the near perfect cast, this is an incredible film. The plot is immediately interesting. It gets going and doesn't stop for even a second. Every scene amps up the stakes and tension. I don't think a bad thing can be said about John McTiernan's directing. This is just par for the course with his filmography, absolutely brilliant.
If you haven't seen this classic, give it a watch. For your own good.
Have a good one.
Jaws (1975)
THE BLOCKBUSTER
Jaws, without question, is a legendary film, and there's a reason for that.
This movie is beautiful to me. I believe a films age and style is what adds to its appeal. Jaws is a film about a killer shark yet I care as much about everything else as I do the shark. That is something I think nearly any other filmmaker might have found impossible.
There are no negatives for me to mention here, none that spring to mind. I find this film to be something I can curl up and watch, just existing in my movie world. It's atmosphere is so friendly, which makes the harsh edges on it cut deep. Especially towards the phenomenal climax.
I don't know how to explain the brilliance of this movie without writing a novel. So I'll say it's a 10/10 till the end of time.
Have a good one.
2 Guns (2013)
CHARISMA OVERLOAD
2 Guns is such a good action film. There is little to no fat on this movie. It runs at such a solid and enjoyable pace that you hardly realise the runtime has gone by the time it ends.
There is so much good to say about this film. But the biggest highlight by far is it's protagonist duo, Mark Wahlberg and Denzel Washington. These two work so well off each other it's scary. They steal every scene they're in, which is perfect as the movie is built to let these characters thrive centre stage. I cannot say anything that does their performances justice, so watch it for yourself.
I have enjoyed coming back to this film for the most part of the last decade. I didn't see it in theatres which is regretful. Though I've made up for it since.
This is 100% worth your time.
Have a good one.
Scream 4 (2011)
BLOODY GOOD
After watching the original Scream in Highschool, I went on to see the whole series. I enjoyed each one until I got to the fourth. At that time I hated Scream 4, I truly didn't enjoy it and now know I didn't understand it.
Fast forward to 2022 I gave a review of it where, once again, I don't think I got it, thinking it was okay. By now, in 2023, as I venture down my own path of writing and creating horror, I see the quality of this film.
Scream 4 for me is just awesome. It's depiction of 2000s horror is so on point and nostalgic. Granted I was a kid during the 2000s, I still remember horror from that time during that time.
The film has such a sense of momentum. Compared to Scream's one through three, four has this sense of constant threat to it. This ghostface is fast, violent and constantly present. He doesn't stop once he starts seemingly, which is how the film feels while watching. It's definitely the fasted paced of the movies so far.
By now, I truly love this film. I see what it was doing and I enjoy it so much. My biggest issue when I saw it originally was the character of Jill. Even as a teenager I was confused as to how a 5'3 teenage girl could kill people like this. At the time I didn't know the answer, that being that she didn't. I have come to learn since that the second culprit Charlie, is widely credited with most of if not all of the murders committed during the film. This alone helped me reassess the movie. Knowing this makes the movie work so well, given Jill's role as the mastermind and Charlie as the hand by which she orchestrates these murders. Jill having little involvement in the violence backs up the films ask that you see her as intelligent, while Charlie comes off more as a sick young man, that keeps his nature hidden from everyone except Jill, his ultimate mistake. This and many other realisations is what got me to come back and discover how much I like this movie.
In closing, Scream 4 is a perfect 2000s slasher, released in 2011 :). It captures a lot of what I enjoy in modern horror, as these ideas were first coming to the forefront in the early 2010s. It's tone is rather unsettling, giving what I think is the most dangerous depiction of Ghostface to date.
I highly recommend this to anyone who enjoys horror, especially if you make slashers esc content yourself. It has so many good aspects to it when looked at through that lens.
Have a good one.
Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story (2004)
SO FUN & SO FUNNY
Dodgeball is a magic movie. The characters, dialog and even setting are so memorable. So much of this movie will be burned into your brain afterwards, it's amazing.
I have a serious soft spot for this movie, as both me and my dad love it's sense of humour. I remember watching it with him as a kid, at all the jokes I didn't get but now do. Scenes and moments from this film are so well done that they almost become photographic in your mind after the fact. I'm not sure how or why but it's definitely a thing not many movies can do.
For those that enjoy this kind of humour, this film really works. It delivers absolutely ever potential promise that the premise could present. I love it, will continue to love it and can't wait to watch it again.
Have a good one.
Scream (2015)
SEASON 1
Scream Season 1 was something I went into worried about things I think many people would fear might happen to a beloved IP turned Netflix show. My gut wasn't wrong, almost every new creative liberty taken with this premise is poor, even terrible at times. Take the killer for example. A person we see manhandle a teenage girl like she's paper, capture and kill 6ft plus jocks and flip a two meter tall freezer on their own, turns out to be a 5'3 young woman. Something repeated in the newest Scream 5. It's made worse given the casts variety of physically capable characters who could have believably done what the show wants you to think the killer did. It's lazy. The only reason this show doesn't tank into terrible territory are said characters. Most of the supporting cast is great. Some I truly wanted to see behind the mask by the end, such as Jake. However the killer in this is so obvious, the second she appears you know she's the killer. There is no clue in that this person is the killer, they are just so poorly injected into the story that you immediately go "Oh they did it". This happened for my at the beginning of episode 2, I promise you it is that obvious and poorly done.
I wanted to like this. Some of what could have been done with this series with this cast would have been special. But it goes for the absolute minimum, while baring the name of a movie that set the standard for that kind of thing.
The only reason this gets points is because of the cast, costume designers, directing and hints of possibility. The narrative writing though is laughable bad, only getting worse as the show goes on.
I wanted to like this so much.
I haven't seen season 2 yet, but that gut feeling is back.
Have a good one.
The Outfit (2022)
SO CLOSE TO PERFECTION
The Outfit, up until roughly the last 20 - 25 minutes, is phenomenal, 10/10, with one of the best performances I have ever seen an actor give in the form of Mark Rylance's character Leonard Burling.
It breaks my heart to say that the finale of this film is so below the bar it hurts. The rest of the film is damn masterclass with killer performances and cinematography left and right. However once a character named Violet steps into the story, it flops, comes to a halt, looses all of that genius it had in exchange for basic, lazy twists and turns. I'd be willing to believe that the script was written to end differently, that from Violets introduction onwards, a different worse writer took over. It doesn't seem like the same writing from that point on, I don't get it.
I must say though, the movie up till that point is outstanding. Some of the best character work I have recollection of. The setting is perfection. Every detail matters and it's masterful.
This had the legs to be one of the best films I have ever seen, but I cannot overlook the ending, it killed it.
Have a good one.
The Watch (2012)
A WATCH THAT GAVE ME TEARS
The Watch is so funny. I can't state enough how funny this is if your the right target for its humour.
There isn't any downtime in this film. You get so much time with the characters, ranging from casual talks to alien encounters. It makes them so much more memorable having them interact in so many environments and settings.
I've loved this film ever since it came out and each time I return to it, I feel like I love it just a little bit more.
Highly recommended!
Have a good one.
Chopping Mall (1986)
SO MUCH RETRO FUN
Chopping Mall is an absolute classic. The 80s is dripping from this movie throughout, it is so much fun.
The characters are great, the robots so memorable and fun. I think that's the perfect word for this movie, FUN.
If you're looking for a film that throws you right back into the 80s and keeps you entertained from start to finish, this is a perfect selection to check out.
Have a good one.
Scary Movie (2000)
SUPER FUNNY
Scary Movie is a riot. Such a good parody of Scream and other horror features from the 90s.
If your looking for something to watch with friends and have a laugh, this is it. Don't come looking for high brow comedy, come in looking for dumb humour that works the majority of the time.
I really rate this as far as comedies go!
Have a good one.
The Other Guys (2010)
SO SO GOOD!
The Other Guys is one of the funniest films out there. Will Ferrell and Michael Keaton are great as always. But the standout is Mark Wahlberg, who plays it so straight and gives legitimately one the funniest performances in recent memory.
Honestly there isn't a major character in the film that doesn't get a laugh in. Plus any film that has so much going on that by the end, you forget the Rock and Sam L. Jackson were in it, is doing something right.
I love this film, have done for a while. Recommended for anyone looking for a comedy with awesome characters.
Have a good one.
Ransom (1996)
A GOOD WATCH
Ransom is a solid movie, with some standout performances by Mel Gibson, Gary Sinise and Delroy Lindo.
I thoroughly enjoyed this film in most part due to the acting and behaviour of Gibsons character, who responds to the kidnapping of his kid in ways I did not expect. The story is by no means run of the mill, with character turns that will surprise you throughout the runtime.
I highly recommend Ransom, a genuinely solid movie.
Have a good one.
Blue Streak (1999)
EXACTLY AS ADVERTISED
Blue Streak is exactly what you think it is. A fun, explosion filled action comedy from the 90s. It gives you exactly what it promises, no more no less. A solid, sit back and relax with your feet up movie.
I have a serious soft spot for films like this. They put you in a good mood, letting you forget your troubles for an hour and a half. Nothing game changing, but 100% as advertised. Really enjoyed this one.
Have a good one.
Executive Decision (1996)
MASTERCLASS ACTION
Executive Decision is a film that promises a two hour sky high set-piece, however it gives that and then some. There is no fat on this picture. Every second is escalation in the action and suspense.
There is not a single performance in the cast that was lacking. Kurt Russell and John Leguizamo in particular bring their best that I've seen of them yet.
I could write a novel on what I liked in this film, so I'll finish by explaining why it only gets a 9 instead of a 10. Just for me personally, it ended too fast. I wanted to relish in the aftermath of that fantastic climax. It was so well set up and earned.
The only negative I have for the movie is that, it left me wanting more. Perhaps that's on me though.
Have a good one.
Scream (1996)
THE SLASHER!
Scream is among my three favourite movies. I truly believe, as far as horror goes, this is as good as it gets.
I first watched Scream in highschool at a house party, yes really. I remember sitting down, distracted by my friends, being told how good this movie was. I was half paying attention as it begun. Yet I swear to you no more than a minute in not only was I silent, glued to the TV, but so was pretty much everyone else. I can so clearly recall looking around at all the people in the living room, catching their eyes as the opening scene was ramping up. It scared the life out of me.
I have nothing negative worth saying about the film. To this day Skeet Ulrich as Billy Loomis is the best performance I have ever seen. The character works so perfectly with everything and everyone around him. Not a single shot is wasted when it comes to the characters. Every line they say or look they give serves a purpose. Once again I sight Billy Loomis as the shining example of this.
The feel and vibe of this movie is perfection. The atmosphere is so nostalgic in regards to being a teenager into horror movies. I can't name a film with a more notable ascetic. Which is such an achievement given its basic setting. I cannot think of a single significant facet in which this movie does not succeed.
Alongside all of that, the movie is so clever. With the birth of analyse videos on youtube, people breaking down the film shot by shot, we can truly appreciate how smart the writing is. So many little things that, if noticed, key you in on things to come and crucial plot points. Scream rewards you as the audience for paying attention, something the majority of films are not capable of doing.
I cannot state how much I love this film with what I know of the english language. If there is ever a horror film you give your attention to, make it Scream. I did at age 14 and I've never looked back.
Have a good one.
Nowhere to Run (1993)
Good Old School
Nowhere to Run is a film that I put on expecting an explosive action spectacle. What I got was a legitimately solid performance from Jean-Claude Van Damme and 1 hour 30 minutes of beautiful cinematography in a peaceful countryside setting. There are hardly any cityscapes or townships in this movie and, for me, that gave it a unique appeal among other movies in the action & adventure genre.
I really recommend this one. Worth your time and attention. It hits that sweat spot of being badass, while making you feel relaxed and comfortable.