Flealan Reviews

Rise of the Scarecrows (2009 Video)

Words fail me...

[1/10 · 22 August 2009]

This movie is perhaps the worst movie I've seen to date. I love B movie flicks but this was so poor. I couldn't get past the hour mark. I just couldn't. I watched in awe the entire time as the film got worse and worse. One example of how bad this movie is is when the dude hits his girlfriend/wife. How hard is is to stage a slap?

Seriously as if the movie purposely went out of it's way to avoid any good filming or stage techniques.

This film only gets 1 star due to the Old Redneck character. He was so over the top he made me laugh extremely hard all the way through his parts. The part were he his painting and goes into a massive rant made me laugh so hard, I couldn't stop giggling at the thought of it for days. It's just the fact it wasn't meant to be funny.

Watch at your own risk.

Tongan Ninja (2002)

This movie never gets old...

[8/10 · 16 August 2009]

I don't know what it is with me and my taste of bad movies, and I don't know what it is with me and this movie! I can watch it over and over, and it still intrigues me. Maybe its just nostalgic (which may make this review a little bias), but still, this movie is so much FUN! Seriously...

Everything is done so bad on purpose, it actually gives the movie it's own goofy charm! From the characters called "Action Fighter", "Gun Man" and "Cheif Guy", Bad dubbing, and awfully done choreography, what isn't there to love?!

You can tell the "actors"( if you want to call them that) are really enjoying performing in this movie. You shouldn't take this too seriously or you won't enjoy it as much. Better yet, get wasted and watch it.

It's nothing groundbreaking, no, no, nothing like that at all. It's just a fun little time waster that is very memorable.

Arthur's Quest (1999 TV Movie)

One of the most terrible movies I've seen to date...

[1/10 · 19 April 2008]

When I bought this at a store for 50p, I expected a cheap giggle, thinking it would be one of them 'It's so bad it's good'. Alas, it was not...

The audio was poor and had to turn up my speakers all the way, and even then I couldn't even understand what was being said from time to time.

I know this is a kid's film, but even they would be disgusted by this. The actors are wooden or just not very good. I felt the story didn't flow very well and there was just no 'magic' you expect for a film that goes by 'Arthur's Quest'.

Put it this way, when me and my mates watched this for a laugh, we didn't even see the end 'cos it was THAT bad. In the end, we all took turns taking a slash on it and then set it on fire.