Change Your Image
Starbl00d
Ratings
Most Recently Rated
Lists
An error has ocurred. Please try againReviews
Broken (2006)
Not agreeing with the masses
I'm sorry, but this film was just awful. I was looking forward to a gory and great underground film- but this wasn't it. Sure, there was a lot of blood and gore...but it just wasn't done very well. The prosthetic pieces were very obvious. I could make better stuff in my kitchen! The main actress was painful in her lack of acting ability. She was god awful. Opening her eyes wide and pretending to be scared and shocked- there was NO real emotion in her eyes and I just did not believe anything she tried to convey. It was just a big joke. I actually shut the movie off when it got the scene where she was trying to remove the razor. Did any of you not see that the prosthetic piece covered half of her belly? She had a belly ring on and the top part of the ring was under the prosthetic piece! Belly rings just don't attach by one end alone. there is a top and a bottom to it, and she was there with the very obvious end piece...but where was the top? Sloppy, unbelievable,unrealistic,horrible acting...I could do better if I tried. Clean it up and maybe it would have been watchable. For now- it wasn't even worth the $1 rental.
Paranormal Activity 2 (2010)
Double everything except the scares
This movie was the absolute pits. While people around me were screaming and jumping, I was sitting there falling asleep, waiting for the few and far between scares. The acting is twice as bad. Katie is twice as fat. The scares aren't scary (there are two jumps. Two. That's all.)The story is lacking any real thought or believable plot at all. It was also twice as funny. Honestly there was more to laugh at then there were things to jump at! There were so many times during this film that I wanted to just strangle the actors. The mom is an annoying and horrible actress who is really ugly, yet always makes little remarks about how cute or hot she is. The dad is hardheaded to a fault, and the daughter is as cliché as they come. They have cameras set up all over the house, yet they only check the footage a handful of times! WTF?! Even Katie's character wasn't as good or believable as in part one. You could tell it was more a case of "been there, done that" for her, as she just doesn't convey any of the same emotions or feeling or reality that she brought to the first film. Part one had some truly creepy moments, where you're at the edge of your seat suffering from some truly unexpected scares. this movie doesn't even come close. This is a case of a movie better left alone.
$#*! My Dad Says (2010)
I'll make this simple:
I don't like Shatner. Never have- ever. But I am a huge fan of this show, and wait for it each week. My family and I laugh throughout most of it, and I see no problems at all with the show or the characters. My least favorite would have to be Nicole Sullivan, which is odd as usually I love her. This is a simple, rude, at times touching, refreshing new show. I think it's much better than a lot of the new crap on T.V. nowadays. The old days of great shows seems to be gone, with shows that were good last season now failing miserably. I've looked into quite a few shows to go along with my usual favorites, and this is the one and only show that made it into the weekly list. Don't listen to all the naysayers- this is really funny. Give it a chance.
The Notebook (2004)
Unlike anything else
I've heard so much about this film, and had always planned on seeing it. I was bored one day and decided to put it in.
This movie is the one and only movie to ever make me full-out cry. I cannot and will not watch this film with anyone else as I just can't control myself. I know it's coming; I know what and where, but it tugs at my heartstrings so badly there is no way I can resist. Sure, other movies have made me tear up (the other version of The Little Mermaid, where she dies at the end, the end of AI, parts of Legends of the Fall...)but with this one, I found myself fully weeping as if it were happening to me.
I'm a sucker for love stories, and people who love each other. I myself have had nothing but bad luck with my love life, and have searched long and hard for "the one". Not able to find it, 3 marriages later, I like to watch love movies and wish I could find someone with that kind of love and dedication for me. It becomes a very personal matter, so it hits me pretty hard when cheating or reunions or whatever come up.
I found the story of their meeting and separating very realistic and heartbreaking. Everything that happened to them seemed extreme to me, and I wanted to take the characters and just help them out. Get together! Love each other! Don't go away! You know what I mean...
The "twist", if it was truly meant to be one, wasn't a twist at all to me, but that doesn't change the emotional impact that comes with it. It's such a depressing and sad story, it stayed in my head so long I always want to watch it- but then again I want it to be fresh, because if you lose the feeling you lose the entire essence of the movie itself. So I stay away, and just remember it.
If you are a fan of truly deep love stories, love stories to put all other love stories to shame, then definitely pick this one up. Not a good idea to watch in front of others if you're a crier, or ashamed of it.
Labyrinth (1986)
Nothing compares, or ever will
Is there anything as magical or as memorable, as this movie? I think not. Labrinth is a timeless treasure, and can be loved and enjoyed throughout generations. I watched it as a child, and it still holds the same magic and wonder it did for me then, seeing it for the first time. I've shared it with my son, and I hope one day to have a daughter to share it with as well.
David Bowie is at the top of his game as the Goblin King. Talented, romantic...You just want to be in Sarah's shoes in this movie! He is so commanding and gorgeous in this fantasy role.
The songs are catchy and will stay in your head long after the film is over. You don't want her to leave, yet you want it all to work out for her in the end (I personally would have stayed with David Bowie!) Not since this movie came out has any other film been quite the same. Nothing can or will ever match it, though there are two other films that have their own magic and remembrance: Legend and The last unicorn. All in all, Labrinth is a great family film that will stay fresh and timeless- and will never be equalled.
She's Out of My League (2010)
What can I say?
I've seen quite a few of these new and crude-humored movies- you know "guy comedy". Some are funny, some are only funny to guys. This one surprised me in that the main character, the "hot girl", was really kind and smart. She wasn't your cliché big breasted bimbo, that's for sure. I was really rooting for her the entire movie. I felt Jay Baruchel played his part remarkably well and realistic also. His friends were hilarious! Especially Stainer, who I find much funnier than Seth Rogen. Marnie was an annoying twerp who got what she deserved, many times over! This movie was so far beyond funny, and the story was just excellent! This is by far my favorite of the crude-humored movies that have been coming out lately. Total thumbs-up and a definite recommendation!
The Last House on the Left (2009)
Made me rethink my pre-formed opinion
I have seen the original "Last house on the left", drawn in by the tagline "To avoid fainting, keep repeating "It's only a movie...It's only a movie...". I thought to myself any movie that needs to remind you it's only a movie must be brutal and horrific and memorable. I'm sure that when the movie came out it was shocking, but to my desensitized brain it was boring. Nothing was shocking or extreme, the story sucked, the effects sucked, and there was far too much sex (as is the case for many movies nowadays). When I heard they were remaking it, and everyone was excited, I was quick to give my two cents about how awful the original was, and how dirty and blah this new one was surely going to be. On Yahoo Answers, many people were asking questions about the storyline, which I happily gave away in great detail, to the anger and disgust of others. You just have no idea how upset I was at how lame the original movie was, as I has searched long and hard for a copy! I had no hope for this one.
Then came the day we were walking around in the video store, with no options. I spotted the remake and decided for $1, I may as well try it. At least it would give me something else to make fun of. I was wrong.
Almost instantly I was pulled into the movie. The blood are gore were amazing and brutal. The nudity and sex was almost non-existent (Aside from the rape scene, which to me wasn't nearly as bad as most people make it out to be...and I have personally been raped). The acting was amazing! I thought the parents did an excellent job acting scared, unsure, angry, vengeful. The criminals changed from being the hunters to becoming the hunted. I was thoroughly annoyed at the main character's friend, but I didn't have to worry about her for too long. This is the only movie I can think of where I wanted to the bad guys to lose. I was extremely surprised by this film, and it made me eat my words, for sure! Next time I'll be sure to watch a movie remake before judging it so harshly; it would have been a shame to have missed out on this masterpiece. It is so incredibly hard to find a good movie with lots of gore and cringe worthy moments that isn't bogged down by sex and bad acting.
Predators (2010)
Worth waiting for
I am, and always have been, a fan of the Predator series. I even liked AVP, though not AVP 2. One thing that has always bothered me was that you never see too much of the Predators (or not enough, in my humble opinion). In this film, however, we see plenty of them. There are different kinds of Predators as well, and we are also treated to seeing the original Predator design, along with the new ones. There are also some well-timed jumps and a pretty nice twist or two.
The beginning of the film did remind me of the Saw and the Cube series, in that you find a group of people together with no one knowing how or where they are, or for what purpose. I had a lot of trouble with the accents in this movie as well, which is why I didn't rate it higher. I'm just waiting for the DVD so I can read the subtitles and figure out what I missed! There are a few genuinely creepy moments in the beginning of the movie, and some nice blood effects.
It really was great to see the Predators back and up to their old tricks. There's nothing quite like the moment when you see one stand up and remove their invisibility, and then behind him is another...and another...All massive and oh-so-impressive to look at.
I had no problem with Adrian Brody in his part; although I'm not used to seeing him play such a tough-guy character, I feel he did very well. Topher Grace, on the other hand, I just saw as Eric Foreman, from "That 70's Show". I've seen him in "Spiderman", of course, and did not like the character he played in that, or in "Win a date with Tad Hamilton". It just wasn't him. In Predators, he is very similar to his usual self from "That 70's show" that it made him very likable and funny at times. He more fits the gangly dork than anything else, so if you liked him in the TV show, you'll like him here (though seeing him as a Doctor and hearing him spout medical terms definitely wasn't believable). Laurence Fishburne plays a very creepy survivor. The other actors didn't stand out too much to me, but all in all the acting was very top-notch, the story solid, and the effects great. I highly suggest you watch this film if you at all are a fan of the Predators series.
Halloween II (2009)
Never before have I wished for death so strongly...
This movie was the absolute pits. Horrible doesn't even begin to describe it. There was just SO much wrong here! Firstly, Laurie Strode and friends...what can I say about these girls that can convey my absolute disgust at having to sit through a movie listening to these girls act up and try to come across as tough and sexy? Laurie did nothing but yell and whine the entire movie, gone from too goody-goody to an awful, unfitting "tough rocker girl" character. Her dark haired friend prances in and acts like the hottest thing on two legs. I'm actually ashamed to be of the same gender as these annoying children after having to stomach their crap. Laurie was a character that needed to die horribly a thousand times over. It is mostly because of her that I will never watch this film again. The blood effects were pretty great, I really enjoyed the killings although the dream sequences got in the way far too much. The killings themselves were thoughtless, brutal yet boring at the same time. I didn't like how they tried to throw in some feeling at the end, when her friend from part one dies. they made it very dramatic, with flashbacks to her friend as a young girl...slow music...overuse of the word "baby"...but still I did not feel a single thing. It's a classic case of too much, too late!
I did not agree with the fact that after Laurie discovers she is related to Michael,suddenly she has this connection with him, seeing the same visions he does. They should have left it with a vision or two explaining why he feels the need to kill her, and dropping it after that. There was no need for her "ghost" to show up every few minutes, or the vision of himself as a young boy. Speaking of the young boy- they made a huge mistake in getting another boy to play the young Michael! Daeg Faerch has such a unique face, and he really fit the role very well. As a fan of the first Halloween movie, I felt cheated to have to see another boy playing the part. I understand about the growth spurt and all that, but what they should have done was never allowed young Michael's face to be seen. He was always wearing a mask anyways, and it would have been less apparent that it was someone else in the role. That really distracted me.
I also disagree with the showing of Micheal's face. He blatantly walks around without a mask on through most of the movie. To me, Michael Myers is a much the mask as Freddy is the knife glove. You just don't remove something so iconic. You can't have him without his mask- it isn't right. That's part of the mystery of the character!
After watching this and realizing how utterly disappointed I was in it, all I can say is, "What the Hell was Rob thinking?!" I expected far, far more. Bland killings, overly annoying characters, all mystery removed from Michael, useless nudity, Laurie and friends calling each other "baby" enough to make a lesbian want to turn straight, too much cursing, a change of a main actor, overdone dream sequences...give it a miss unless you can see it for free- and even then, isn't there something better you can do with your time?
Alice in Wonderland (2010)
All flash and no fire
I am a big fan of the Alice in Wonderland franchise. I love the books, the cartoon, the imagery, the toys- basically everything Alice. I went to see this movie with really high hopes. I had heard they were making the story a bit different, so I was very hyped up. Unfortunately this movie was awful. Not as bad as others I've seen but definitely not worth waiting for.
Johnny Depp was as great as he always seems to be, as was Helena Bonham Carter. Alice was very wooden and looked extremely bored. There was no feeling in the movie whatsoever. Anne Hathaway...What can I say about her? Her character was alright, but her face and makeup were so hideous, she was a freak amongst freaks. She is what partially ruined this movie for me. I couldn't stand her movements and especially her makeup.
The visuals were lovely and dark, very typical Tim Burton, but soon they became very overwhelming and just distracting. Too much CGI. I also found it hard to hear and understand what people were saying. Another sore point I have is how everyone has a different name. I mean Wonderland isn't even Wonderland- it's Underland. Alice doesn't remember being there, but why? No explanation is given. I mean, in Return to Oz Dorothy was given electric shock therapy, you know? Everyone seemed very one-dimensional and boring.
One thing I did like, however, was how some parts of it flashed back to the cartoon Alice that most of us are familiar with. It was great seeing things "live" that before had only been seen in a cartoon. Alice also sounds remarkably like the Alice from the cartoon as well. The Queen of Hearts is an amusing character, and I ended up really liking her, although the way she says "Off with her head" is distinctly different and I didn't like it. This movie has you flashing to the cartoon but then changing key aspects.
All in all, I'd say this is more of a rental movie, or dollar movie. Going to see it full price is sorely advised against. While you're waiting for the movie to start and actually grab you, you find the credits are rolling and it's already over- then you're left wondering,"What just happened? did I like it?" And the answer to that is a resounding "No".
Carnival of Souls (1998)
Contrary to the popular opinion...
I enjoyed this film. I liked it when I first saw it years ago, and I liked it this time. I do have to say there are things about it that I noticed now that I'm older, that I didn't like, but overall the story was really good. The end especially was very memorable. The creatures were scary but reminded me of Hellraiser's cenobytes (not a bad thing), and I thought the killer clown could have and should have been scarier, more threatening. I was very upset that they somehow forgot that the little girls portraying the main characters had bright, bright green/blue eyes as kids, but as adults one has brown eyes and one blue- a totally different shade. The whole "I'm going insane" idea I do love, however, and that is what made me like the movie so much.
Saw VI (2009)
The best of the best
I've seen a lot of negativity about the Saw series, with many people saying it should end and that each film is worse than the last. I, however, find this not to be true, and have always been a fan. To me, each film that comes out is an improvement on the last, and this latest installment did not disappoint me.
The deaths are gore- filled, the story full of revelations and twists. The traps are still amazingly sadistic, and somehow the writers are able to constantly give us new insight into situations we thought we already had figured out. Everything fits in beautifully in the Saw universe,and just when you think they can't possibly explain any more, they surprise us yet again. I won't give away any spoilers, but suffice it to say the ending had me on the edge of my seat. I always cringe when the credits roll- I want more! more! more!...especially with this one. I daresay this surpasses Saw V by miles. I'm left breathless, hating the critics, and wondering what will come next, waiting for yet dreading the end of the series. This is a big thing, considering I'm usually of the mindset that sequels should never pass 3- if that. As far as I'm concerned, they can just keep making Saw, as I'll always be there, watching.
The Final Destination (2009)
Being 3D doesn't save it
I love the Final Destination films. Sure, they got a worse and worse as they went on, but they were all still watchable and pretty creepy. You cared about the characters, you wanted them to find out about the original flight 180 so maybe they could escape and survive (most of the time). The deaths were realistic, scary, and often threw you for a loop by misleading you and making you guess how the actors would die. The effects were good and there was a real creepy "feel" to the films. This one, however, has no business sharing the Final Destination title with the other films. You just don't care about who's who, what's what...then ending is 100 % predictable, the deaths too fast and the effects horrible. the 3D was OK- good for me as it was my first- but I do agree with the other post about how the trailers made better use of the 3D. If it had just been a regular screening I would have demanded my money back. I didn't care who died or when, I just didn't care. Then suddenly the movie was over and I found myself wondering where the time went- there was absolutely nothing memorable about it. I sure hope they do NOT make a number 5! Give this one a miss- if you want to see a 3D movie spend your money on A Christmas Carol, or the upcoming Alice in 3D...I know I will.
The Midnight Meat Train (2008)
Not at all impressed
I have heard a lot about this film, with people writing me telling me I should see it, as I am a fan of extremely bloody, gory movies. I got my hands on it almost right away, but one thing or another always kept me from watching it- until now. I would have been better off not remembering I even had it.
This movie was atrocious. The worst thing though is that it could have been so much better than it actually was. I know it was a story by Clive Barker and all, and no I have not read that story- but it appears to me that if you haven't then you will be, as I was, completely clueless and utterly disappointed.
The film begins good enough- the actors are convincing, the story interesting. The first scene is bloody- a great way to catch your attention. I thought the blood looked a bit bad, but seeing as it was the very first scene I did hope for improvement later on. I was wrong.
The blood and effects are so horrible, it was almost an insult to my intelligence to be expected to believe that, for instance, someone could knock a person's head right off their shoulders using only a meat hammer. WTF? CGI blood (did they even use ANY "real" blood at all? My home made stuff looks better than any used in this film!), unbelievable acts of dismemberment (eyeballs popping out just from getting hit in the back of the head; arms cut neatly off- does no one remember there are BONES all throughout our bodies?!), too-dark scenes (every scene is either an odd yellow color, or in hidden in shadows)...it just gets worse and worse. I found myself pointing out mistake after mistake. There's just too much. Add that to the fact that what could have and should have been a great serial-killer movie turns into some demonic/supernatural/monster movie at the end...no thank you! It should have been kept as a creepy guy butchering people in the subway- OK, with a conspiracy theory thrown in- and an overzealous photographer. Maybe they murder people and sell the meat via the meat plant? Plausible, doable...and a lot better I think than the "real" story. That could have and should have worked. Instead it became a "creatures living at the end of the old tunnel and everyone knows about it but you, and unless you read the book, well...you just won't ever understand it" fiasco. Tragic, what an awful thing to do to a movie with such potential. If you like mindless fake blood and gore, you'll love this. But if you have half a brain in your head then you will completely hate it. Stay away- far, far away.
Hellraiser: Hellworld (2005)
Waste of time
To be honest, I didn't even make it all the way through this piece of crap movie. It was horrible! Boring, with a story that made absolutely no sense, and full of random nudity and sex. Not creepy, bloody, or even like a Hellraiser movie at all! They should have used another actor to play Pinhead, this movie surely couldn't have been made worse by it.What were they thinking when they made this garbage? I'd rate it zero if I could. I think I made it about 85% through the movie, there was about 15-30 minutes left of it, and if the end redeemed it...well...I wasn't willing to waste a second more watching to see. The series had gotten steadily worse, but in the end they were watchable. This travesty though...I think it's time to stop.
Awake (2007)
Shocking on many levels
My husband and I had been scouting the video store, upset at our lack of choices as we have rented almost everything they offer. Then I looked up and saw "Awake". At first we debated getting it because neither of us had ever heard of it- no trailers or anything, but the concept seemed interesting and we went ahead and gave it a shot. It seemed just like a disturbing, interesting movie to begin with, but nothing special. By the time the movie was over, however, we were on the edges of our seats, transfixed. When the movie was over we just stared at each other, saying," Wow. That was just wrong." over and over. I won't go into specifics here, but trust me when I say that this movie is a delight! It stays with you long after the movie has finished, and while it may seem to start slow it all comes together beautifully. When it ended I wanted to put it back in and watch it again. Definitely NOT a waste of your time.
9 out of 10 stars!
I Still Know What You Did Last Summer (1998)
Surprisingly good sequel
I'll admit I had some reservations about watching this, as the ending of part one leaves you with the question of how Julie (Jennifer Love Hewitt) survives. Unfortunately, that question is never explained in part two, but the rest of the story (while a bit predictable)is extremely enjoyable. The characters are more polished, and it seems more work went into this movie. The story keeps you interested with some pretty good jumps thrown in, and a bit of twist as well. The ending is reminiscent of part one and as far as I am concerned the story should just have ended here. A good sequel that won't leave you feeling as if you have just wasted your time.