Media_guru Reviews

Our Drawings (2023)

Um, what?

[1/10 · 10 March 2024]

What is the plot of this movie you may ask? The answer is that there barely is one and it truly doesn't matter anyway. One hour of total nonsense, this film seems like a middle schoolers' D grade film project.

Viewership has quite likely been propelled my numerous negitive commentary videos by popular Youtubers. Those who love "hate watching" pressed play hoping for a perposperous treat, but the majority of it is so boring, the fun dwindles even before the half-way point.

The plot is inconsistant, the editing lazy and slowed to burn time in order to make the 60 minute mark. The sound is subpar. When watching, one who was raised to be kind to all, may struggle to find something positive to say. "A for effort"?

1 point for the Beatboxing Puppy song Which is both exactly as it sounds and more amazing than you can imagine. The song can be found independently on YouTube and has the same context inside the movie as outside.

90's House (2017)

Forgivably Stupid

[4/10 · 20 February 2024]

Right from the trailer, it's no surprise that. 90s House is fake/staged and yet I was compelled to watch each episode.

These types of "reality" shows are made with the same ingredients: contestants to love, contestants to hate, contestants you love-to-hate. Irritatingly fake drama. Perfected premises and editing to keep the viewer hooked, at least until the end of the episode, and in this particular case, bait for early Millennials/Gen Xers to hate-watch these "Kids today!" "They don't know what a fax machine is??!" With this in mind, 90s house is surprisingly watchable.

Like walking into a sweets shop, with the pretty packaging, bubblegum pop and comforting nostalgia, 90s house is brain candy at it's finest.

Frasier (2023– )

Take me back, Seattle!

[4/10 · 7 December 2023]

I would say the new Frasier lacks a je ne sais quoi, but I DO sais; the quoi is Niles (or at least what Niles represents.)

The original Frasier based it's premise on Frasier's relationships with his family and friends, most notably his compatibility with his brother (and opposite with his father.) Frasier's relationships shed light on who Frasier Crane was: intelligent, cultured and kind.

The original Frasier was a bit formulaic; opening with light jokes, usually set into motion by one of his callers, introduction to the premise of the episode and then ramping up to a droll comedy-of-errors. Yes, it was formulaic, but it was also CLEVER.

The new series has next to none of the original's wit. It is full of easy jokes and stock characters: Freddy's unintelligent friends, Frasier's eccentric colleagues, even the literal girl-next-door. It truly feels like the generic '90s sitcoms that the original had so successfully avoided. That said, I wouldn't say it's unwatchable; it has it's entreating moments. But approach it as a silly sitcom that just happens tp star Kelsey Grammar because if you tune in to see a continuation of "Frasier", you will be sorely disappointed.

That '90s Show (2023– )

Enjoyable with potential

[8/10 · 23 January 2023]

It's a common opinion that the best characters from 70s were Red and Kitty. Thus it was a solid idea to bring them back for 90s and it worked out great as both actors reprised their roles as if they never left.

Now, it's a common opinion that the teens of 90s don't hold a candle to the teens of 70s. This is true, however there is still positive things to say about "the new kids" As expected the teens of 90s are a facsimile to 70s: Fez 2.0, Hyde 2.0 and Kelso 2.0 who is actually a Kelso, Jackie and Michael's son Jay. Kudos goes to Mace Coronel, who does an excellent job emulating his charater's father. And while the 2.0 issue is clear, all the current teen actors do a fair job adding their own twists.

As for the "ninties-ness", many late Gen Xers/early miilenials are disapointed that the series doesn't seem to fit in with their own memories from their formative years, but it should be noted that (at least after season 1) 70s wasn't very obnoxious with the THIS IS THE SEVENTIES! Allousions and that such was the issue which made That 80s Show such a collosal failure.

The issue seems to be with the new batch of actors, which are less likeable and more juvenile. Social media could be a great way to save the series in season 2, which I think it deserves, because all the comments and reviews can be used to send writers back to the drawing board and tweak the series into something that can really be loved.

The Celebrity Dating Game (2021)

Summer lovin', cancelled so fast.

[2/10 · 22 June 2021]

What do you get when you pair an iconic musician with a talented actress/singer, add some nostalgia with a twist? An insufferable waste of time.

"Celeb" Dating Game seems on the surface a fun throwback the likes of which we have come to expect in the era of reboots, but in reality it is even worse than the brain candy that summer tv provides. It's more like brain inedible-object-one-finds-in-between-the-couch-cushions. (Maybe while searching for the remote?) Zooey speaks both overly loud and insincere. Michael looks like he's mourning his career. Every person on stage looks incredibly awkward.

It's not even so-bad-it's-good, it is simply bad.

Kenan (2021–2022)

Disappointing

[5/10 · 17 February 2021]

With so many seasoned comics, this show had a lot of potential. Unfortunately, that potential was not reached. Kenan plays "Kenan", a widowed father., and like many of it's predecessors, the premise relies on secondary characters to help the single parent but in actuality only helps to create more characters and storylines. It has the feel of a school play and is actually pretty dull. It has heart, but no humour. Kenan should stick to his day (or in this case Saturday night) job.

Love, Guaranteed (2020)

All the hallmarks of a Hallmark.

[4/10 · 14 February 2021]

This film is so predictable, is predictably is predictable. Mismatches come together! Kooky supporting characters! Constant reminders of what season it is! It is like a Hallmark movie with slightly better known actors. That being said, this movie is not terrible. Main character Susan is relatable to the key audience and while generic, the supporting cast is entertaining. The over-the-top finale is responsible for my personal rating of below-average. If you're the the type to like rosee wine and/or knitted sweaters. (not that there's anything wrong with said type), you may find this a fun way to kill 90 minutes.

Call Me Kat (2021–2023)

Meh.

[5/10 · 4 January 2021]

What's good: I like the actors. A few good jokes. Cats!

What's bad: It's narrated. Characters and jokes are cliché. Could use *more* cats.

Conclusion: This show is pretty run-of-the-mill. That could prove to be either comforting or boring to audiences. It has a likeability among a certain demographic, mostly single middle aged women (like Kat herself), but lacks mass appeal. Best wishes.

Celebrity Watch Party (2020)

Mindless summer fun

[7/10 · 4 December 2020]

It comes as no surprise that this show will never win an Emmy, but it finds an appropriate spot in the summer broadcasting season where C grade shows usually appear. One does not need have a particularly high level of education to enjoy this show nor would it find it's place even among a book club crowd, but it's a fun to watch whilst bored. The personalities and their comments are enjoyable and often funny. Enjoy with a nice IPA or lager after work or errands.

Roseanne (1988–2018)

You Can't Go Home Again

[3/10 · 4 April 2018]

One can expect a sequel, remake or reboot to not be as good as the original, but the revival of Roseanne goes so far off track, it could be seen careening into the woods. A great thing about the original Roseanne (at least the first four seasons), was how real it seemed. The conversations of money that seem like transcripts of real couples' tiffs; the genuinely funny jokes and likeable characters. Alas, not one of this is present in the revival. Firstly the laugh track. Loud and obnoxious, the only thing funny about this is that we are to believe it is "filmed in front of a live studio audience." On the topic, what show claims this anymore? The jokes, once clever and often subtle, are changed to lame, Disney sitcom-esque punch lines displayed to the audience like headlights on a dark highway. The difference from such and that of Roseanne is that Roseanne goes out of the way to be offensive. THE POLITCS!!: In 2018, it is hard to escape people sharing their political opinions online. (Linus must be spinning in his grave.) But, like the jokes, the views are beyond blatant, seemingly taking up at least half the first episode. Funny V.S. Over-the-top, Charming V.S. Detestable, Relatable V.S. Borderline insane, comparing the original series to the new is like comparing a professional singer singing the Star-spangled Banner to hearing it sung by well, Roseanne.

Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (2009–2014)

Don't hate the messenger

[19 March 2009]

I will say right off the bat, this is not as good as it was with Conan, but I do not think Fallon is to blame. The problem with this show is simple, bad writing. When watching this show, I wonder if any of the writing staff stayed on from Conan, especially the later episodes; there was still a lot of unfunny jokes when O'Brien was the host. The difference? Conan can roll with the punches and has a lightning fast sense of humour. I can think of many jokes saved by said humour. As such, one should note that Fallon is a baby, while Conan has been doing this for a very long time. Don't put the blame on Jimmy Fallon, give him some time to hone his skills and let's hope the jokes improve as well. Knock wood.

Chilly Beach (2003–2006)

Oh, Canada!

[8/10 · 30 September 2006]

If this show were a person, it would be madly in love with the CBC if it were a person. They would hold hands and skip through flowery meadows as cheesy music plays. What I mean by this is Chilly Beach has CBC written all over it.

It follows the lives of two Canadian friends. Dale and Frank these guys seem to be rather good pals considering their respective favorite hockey teams seem to be knock offs of the Ottawa Senators and Toronto Maple Leafs (Real life adversaries) This is true unless they're discussing hockey, of course. This is one branch of the stereotype of Canadians on which this is entirely based. Luckily, Canadians have the ability to laugh at themselves so this show flies. Fans of other CBC hits such as Air Farce and This hour has 22 minutes will find delight in story lines such as a trip to the beer store and the daily temperature "highs" that are still in the blue. With all the flag waving on part of the Americans lately, Chilly Beach is refreshing dip in a nearly frozen pond.

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (2005)

Another Burton gem

[2 August 2005]

Tim Burton fans are not to be disappointed with his latest unique tale. Charlie Bucket is a happy, polite boy despite the fact his family is poor. When Willy Wonka announces he will be giving away tours to his legendary chocolate factory, Charlie dreams of how nice it would be on actually win. The golden tickets are found speedily by children around the world evaporating Charlie's hope, but in a luck only found the the movies Charile find money in a snow bank and rushes to by one more chocolate bar-of course he wins-if this wasn't intended for children I would have been a horrible "convenice" but since the script is kid friendly, it was just cute. Enter Willy Wonka (the freakishly talented Johnny Depp)who's clever one-liners make the film He gives the winners the promised tour where all except Charlie fall victim to fun ploys suited to their chief sin.

Like all Burton films, Charlie is an artistic masterpiece and the script is anything but a corny children's film.(although I see no problem in bringing a child) The kids are just nasty enough for a comedic effect with out getting annoying and Charlie is the ultimate protagonist and makes me want to have an impoverished Engiish boy-Highly recommended

Seed of Chucky (2004)

they're not even trying anymore!

[14 July 2005]

For some odd reason I liked Bride of Chucky (my guess is I was 15 at the time and thus really cheaply thrilled) but just an ounce of gained intelligence was all I needed to be turned off by the newest addition. As easily predicted, it follows Chucky's son (or daughter, but who cares?) (Billy Boyd) to England where he is a sideshow attraction. Later as he's watching TV (because even living dolls just can't resist a little telly) he sees replicas of his parents. soon he's in Hollywood resurrecting Chucky (Brad Dourif) and Tiff without even knowing it. Then they kill a bunch of people, the end. Jennifer Tilly is in this one as well but this time as herself, as well as Tiffany's voice (if your going to use the same person for two parts could you pick someone with a less distinctive voice? this is the first of a wide array of faults mainly with the script. knowing it lacked in the horror department Marcini attempted make it part-comedy but the jokes proved worse than the watered down plot which was the biggest iceberg of this box-office Titanic.

Police Academy 2: Their First Assignment (1985)

Beat the softmore(sp) curse?

[17 June 2004]

Does it count when a sequel is better if the first was horrible? I guess it does in this case! In the first of too many sequels, the team receives their first assignment, chasing a gang of `street punks' led by Bobcat Goldthwait. (a brilliant casting move) Goldthwait's fun performance, along with a few (like three or four) more jokes do defy the sequel curse; that wasn't hard, look at the first! However when Bobcat Goldthwait is your highest point your in trouble. bottom line if you like mindless somewhat fun comedies this is for you.

It also defies an even rarer rarity: something watchable from the eighties!

World Idol (2003 TV Special)

Annoying

[29 December 2003]

That's how I can sum it all up. Now I am a huge fan of the American and Canadian Idol shows, you could even say I'm obsessed. (I have never missed an American episode and am even listening to Kelly Clarkson as we speak) but the internatinal version, World Idol was strangly more pathetic. Anyone can tell you that a person will root for a person from their state/provice but their own country? Bias-City! (Despite this fact, you cannot vote for your own idol) It's almost like moving backwards in a dememted sort of way (11 countries battling each other?) With a Judge for each contestant who unsurprisingly favors there own contedor and annoying bad cutting in the Canadian version, World idol was just mean and well, annoying!

(sorry for spelling/grammer mistakes)

Freddy vs. Jason (2003)

GREATEST MOVIE EVER! (possible spoilers)

[16 August 2003]

it's been a long time since a super awesome movie has hit the theaters but this is it. After a friend dies, Lori and her friends undergo a horrific adventure Freddy Krueger style (if you've seen any nightmare on elm streets you will know what I mean)Plus being stalked by freaky Jason, too!

it automatically rocks because it is so classic; two horror icons battling it out it literally combines the creepiest parts of both movies. If that's not enough, it has the most creepy and the best movie ending I have ever seen! Seriously, of all time!

Just Married (2003)

Awwwww!

[8 August 2003]

If there's one thing I love, it's Ashton Kutcher, and he was only the icing on the cake. In this cute comedy Tom (Kutcher)and Sarah (Murphy) rush into a marriage, only to experience the honeymoon from hell. it's full of fun characters and fun jokes and is really just fun; I recommend it.

Train 48 (2003–2005)

O Canada

[3 July 2003]

Begrudginly, Canada often produces horrible shows. (At no fault of their own I belive) But Train 48 is an exception. Set on a Torontioan train, Train 48 follows the lives of 10 regular passagers. Maybe the fact that it's half script half improv or that their conversations are oh so Canadian, but something is truly addictive about Train 48, you can easily find your self getting into the problems of the charaters, even forming opinions of them.

If you want to see something you can proudly call Canadian, get on the Train

8 Mile (2002)

POWERFUL!

[29 March 2003]

Once you get past all the lingo, 8 mile is one powerful peice of work! loosely based on his own life, conserversal Eminem stars as Jimmy Smith J.R. Making his was through his life anyway he can, dispite horrible curcimstances. occasnally attending "rap battles" to help him get further.

Em defeats the singer = bad actor rule in this raw drama, somthing Britney Spears and Madonna have failed to do before Alhough it's not for everybody, pepole who hate Eminem will hate this movie but if you can get past that you will see that it is so exellent ot is acually award-worthy

The Ring (2002)

WOW!

[11 March 2003]

That is all I have to say after watching the Ring! The plot is great. After the funeral of her niece, Rachel Keller decides to investigate what seems to be a chain of death. Upon retiving clues she watches a mystious video and learns (from a chilling phone call) that she has seven days to live. this drives her on a rampage of solving the mystery and saving her and her son's life. I didn't find the movie scary because I was a vitim of spoilers, but it was exciting enough for me to enjoy. That starts to dwindle it gets a little boring and some parts seem like the cutting crew was asleep. But other than that the movie was suspenseful and cool. I recommend it.

Men in Black II (2002)

not to disapoint

[10 March 2003]

If you liked the frist MIB, you should like this one. It is full of the same types of jokes and charaterization. Now, some may think that is a bad thing but I loved it. you should, however, watch the first one first, so you understand some of the jokes. A big percentage of the first movie's greatness is Will Smith's charachter, and that is no diffrent in this one. So if you enjoyed the frist movie, the second is recomendeed.

An American in Canada (2002–2004)

Great... Message

[2 March 2003]

It's hard for me to admit, but, because of lack of technology and equipment, Canadian produced shows are less good then (Uhhh!) American shows. But it had a good message and the concept was funny but it moved too slow.

Being Canadian, I have a bias which makes the bottom line, it's speed was it's only fault because Canada rocks!

P.S Not for some Americans.

Trapped (I) (2002)

Hey... It wasn't bad!

[2 March 2003]

okay I was not over joyed about watching this but after, I realized it wasn't that bad. 'expert' kidnappers, Cheryl, Joe and Marven, succesfully make their fifth ransom kidnapping, little asametic Abby Jennings. Which lays out the plot of stressed parents seeking back their beloved child for the duration of the movie. Some may call the plot weak and overdone but the movie successfully carried out enough action and suspense to keep it running. However it was good it ended when it did because that was just about to expire.

Sorority Boys (2002)

Good but...

[12 February 2003]

... not great! sure, it had it's moments and good characters but that is all that kept it afloat... if anything. In order to get some tape back, three stereotypical frat boys dress up as three... good-on-the-inside girls and join the DOG house. now I wish I could give you more description but that is all the scratchy, tiny plot lets on. Aside from that, it's full of quick, easy, overdone, and not to mention, immature jokes that are supposed to carry out the movie entirely. One good thing was Michael Rosenbuam. Adam was cute and watching him try to play a woman was equally adorable. In fact, if it weren't for Michael I probably would not like this movie whatsoever