Just watched the current (April 2023) Amazon Prime version of this film and the narration (UK English) is notably excellent. Sounds like the producers may have heeded the voice-over criticism here and released an update. It now sounds great with nice quality production, tastefully edited, ok graphics and well paced and presented - an easy watch if you're interested in this sort of thing. Plenty of well balanced information, new and secondhand, - no aliens etc. - just observation, deduction and plausible conclusions. The original footage and quantity of info contained in the film would justify a rewatch.
Reviews
18 Reviews
Brimstone
(2016)
Sweaty survival Western with feminist/Exploitation edge
10 December 2021
BRIMSTONE is an edgy modern survival/revenge Western, set in a culture of strong liquor and religious fervour, where men's violent exploitation and abuse of women is standard behaviour. It's a story well worth telling and we see it as much from the villain's perspective as from the heroine's. There's some corniness going on here though and Mr. Koolhoven's direction veers towards exploitation during the most harrowing scenes - and that's not classy. In fact, there are gaping plot holes, an unnecessary non-linear timeline and the film is a bit too long. Despite all this, it looks good, there's plenty of well handled edge-of-the-seat tension and great performances all round. Guy Pearce is completely believable as The serpentine sado-paedo-psycho Preacherman. Worth a viewing - it stays with you. To see similar material dealt with in a far better film and from a deeper perspective, check out The Nightingale [2018, Dir. Jennifer Kent].
The Dark
(I) (2018)
Do You Believe in Monsters?
8 July 2021
Superb, intelligent Drama/Horror "The Dark" is probably one to avoid if you prefer slasher/satanic/supernatural/torture/etc. Although there's plenty of gore in first half (nods to Texas Chainsaw), it's a subtle, layered film with heart (hehe). Main theme - the dehumanising effect of abuse - is well handled and Monster/Victim roles are messed with. Thought provoking, atmospheric and genuinely touching. Highly recommended.
Freaks
(2018)
Genre-bending fantasy with heart
10 December 2020
Here's an ambitious film with an inventive tale to tell. Pure fantasy as real visceral experience, brilliantly blend-warping genres. Touching nuanced performances, believable relationships and a keep-you-guessing pace that delivers some juicy surprises. Lots of CGI that never dominates or distracts and rock solid storyline and Direction make whole thing hang together beautifully. It could have been such a mess when you consider all the disparate elements this film brings together. Worth a second watch too.
The Highwaymen
(2019)
Solid Traditional Cinematic Quality. Yawn.
10 December 2020
This is a perfect film to watch with your "Great Cinematography" checklist to hand. It really does do all those spectacularly well shot shots spectacularly well. The performances also Quality; strong and solid - just as you'd expect from these two veteran lads. The story is mostly well paced and um, easy to follow. You wouldn't be wasting your time sitting down to watch this movie. Not at all. But (here it comes) it severely lacks SPARKLE. I'd have settled for sparkle in any form - a bit of irreverent humour, or any sort of humour actually, some surprise twists and turns in the narrative, some nuanced ambiguity on the moral compass, unexpected jigging with the timeline, quirks, mistakes - anything to lift it out of it's solid, conservative Quality traditionalism. The nearest it gets is to expose the true hideousness of it's usually "heroic" villains - so an extra point for that. I'm sure it fulfilled its Netflix brief.
Sucker Punch
(2011)
Dated, lazy filmmaking with spectacular CGI
10 December 2020
I loved 300 and all that heroic SIN CITY-type graphic madness, live action on the fringes of animation. Also I love a lethal female lead hell bent on dealing out justice. So I had high hopes. Man, was I disappointed? This is incredibly lazy filmmaking. There are NO characters - just pretty or ugly puppets - cliched puppets at that. There is NO story - seriously, none. There's a set up but it doesn't go anywhere. This is just a repetitive series of vaguely related vignettes. And so many cliches. Worst of all, is the waste of talent and budget - it LOOKS GREAT, fantastic CGI (hence my generous 3/10 rating) and the performances are fine considering there's nothing here for an actor to work with. Probably would've loved it in 1975 as a 14 year old sack of hetero-hormones. But - when was it made? There's really no excuse. Frustratingly awful.
Siren
(II) (2013)
Pre-#MeToo adult fairytale. A near miss.
22 October 2019
Prettily shot and enjoyable adult-fairytale indie. Competent lead performances and an unusual score that - along with Direction - keeps the film feeling lightweight. It's a pre-#MeToo film and it shows. The premise is full of promise but avoids the deep, dark, dangerous waters of male/female sexual power dynamics. The hurried and predictable ending doesn't stand up to scrutiny and the supporting cast is a little weak. But worth seeing - and a great choice of film for a young couple to watch together. 6.5/10
A Ghost Story
(2017)
Can you handle it?
16 September 2019
A Ghost'S Story would have been an even more descriptive title. Not Horror or even Supernatural - this is an Arthouse meditation on the Meaning of Life/Death/Immortality. An experience. So not everyone's cup of tea. Even if you like said genre, you'll need to be in the right headspace. Give it 10-20 mins to try out. Relax and let yourself drift off into a bit of cinematic meditation. You won't miss anything.
There's little action or dialogue. Each scene is exquisitely composed - often agonisingly slow and the soundtrack is sublime. There's a strong sense of everything happening (mostly nothing) in real time. Eons of real time. The comic-book cliche of a white-sheeted spectre is probably the only dark chuckle you'll get - the film is relentlessly sombre and not overly interested in warmth. Zero sentimentality. Masterful storytelling.
Hope I haven't put you off experiencing this unusual, subtle, beautiful film which has haunted me for days now.
There's little action or dialogue. Each scene is exquisitely composed - often agonisingly slow and the soundtrack is sublime. There's a strong sense of everything happening (mostly nothing) in real time. Eons of real time. The comic-book cliche of a white-sheeted spectre is probably the only dark chuckle you'll get - the film is relentlessly sombre and not overly interested in warmth. Zero sentimentality. Masterful storytelling.
Hope I haven't put you off experiencing this unusual, subtle, beautiful film which has haunted me for days now.
Vampire in Venice
(1988)
Vampire in Venice? Keep your expectations low...
6 September 2013
Nosferatu (dir. F. W. Murnau, 1922) is regarded as a masterpiece. To be honest, I enjoyed Werner Herzog's remake (1979) far more - Klaus Kinski's performance in the title role was perfect; repellent and charismatic in equal measure. So I've been looking forward to seeing this hard-to-get-hold-of "sequel" for years.
Oh dear, what a disappointment. This film is a confused mess.
If "Vampire in Venice" were less conventional, it could be Art-house or Surrealist Cinema. And then its fogginess might be to its advantage. But... it just isn't.
Whereas its' predecessors were directed with a spark of genius, "Vampire in Venice" had a history of directorial dithering - and boy does it show. Despite some excellent cinematography, great sets and a (potentially) strong cast, the film is so weakly directed that it falls apart almost immediately. The cast is wasted. The plot is incongruous. The characters are under-developed and their motivations are anyones' guess. The whole is deeply unsatisfying. Of course, Barabara De Rossi is utterly gorgeous, Plummer has some gravitas and Kinski is OK, but without a firm hand at the rudder, we are on a gondola to nowhere.
Only the film's few saving graces allowed me to watch to the end. One for the curious only, I fear.
Oh dear, what a disappointment. This film is a confused mess.
If "Vampire in Venice" were less conventional, it could be Art-house or Surrealist Cinema. And then its fogginess might be to its advantage. But... it just isn't.
Whereas its' predecessors were directed with a spark of genius, "Vampire in Venice" had a history of directorial dithering - and boy does it show. Despite some excellent cinematography, great sets and a (potentially) strong cast, the film is so weakly directed that it falls apart almost immediately. The cast is wasted. The plot is incongruous. The characters are under-developed and their motivations are anyones' guess. The whole is deeply unsatisfying. Of course, Barabara De Rossi is utterly gorgeous, Plummer has some gravitas and Kinski is OK, but without a firm hand at the rudder, we are on a gondola to nowhere.
Only the film's few saving graces allowed me to watch to the end. One for the curious only, I fear.
The Messengers
(2007)
More plot holes than an unfilled graveyard
4 April 2013
Warning: Spoilers
As it goes, I'm rather fond of a well used horror cliché (and this movie has the lot) but it's the incoherent storyline which is so bothersome here.
How does a film like this ever get made? Why no story editor pointing out the glaring holes in the story? Irritatingly, it really wouldn't have taken that much work to make a decent haunted-house-horror movie of this shambles - the acting, sets, lighting, photography etc. are all perfectly competent. And although the film is never authentically scary, there are plenty of well handled BOO!-made-you-jump moments.
But the film is bursting with inconsistencies. By far, the most grievous and unresolved is the function of the ghosts themselves - what is their motivation, dear? Are they Goody Ghosts on a mission to protect the innocent family from The Killer in their midst? Perhaps - but why then keep attacking the nice family with brutal, spooky violence? They're an ugly bunch, so perhaps they are Really Evil Baddie Ghosts, intent on mindless mayhem. So how come they stop "haunting" as soon as they have exacted their revenge on the perpetrator of their own murders? And why would they be EVIL anyway? I mean, they seemed like perfectly nice (if a bit screamy) people when they were alive. And we never did find out who that little monkey ghost thing is which scuttles around the ceiling. The spirit of dodgy CGI perhaps. I could easily (easily) go on.
One (of many) lingering mysteries this movie leaves in its' wake is "who are the "The Messengers"?" Are they perhaps those squawky Hitchcockian crows, who flap about the film delivering no clear message of any sort? Or are "The Messengers" those confusingly nasty ghosts? Come to that, what exactly is The Message?
Anyway, my message to you - discerning, intelligent connoisseur of horror movies that you are - should be clear enough; don't waste your time on mediocrity, it'll only make you grumpy.
How does a film like this ever get made? Why no story editor pointing out the glaring holes in the story? Irritatingly, it really wouldn't have taken that much work to make a decent haunted-house-horror movie of this shambles - the acting, sets, lighting, photography etc. are all perfectly competent. And although the film is never authentically scary, there are plenty of well handled BOO!-made-you-jump moments.
But the film is bursting with inconsistencies. By far, the most grievous and unresolved is the function of the ghosts themselves - what is their motivation, dear? Are they Goody Ghosts on a mission to protect the innocent family from The Killer in their midst? Perhaps - but why then keep attacking the nice family with brutal, spooky violence? They're an ugly bunch, so perhaps they are Really Evil Baddie Ghosts, intent on mindless mayhem. So how come they stop "haunting" as soon as they have exacted their revenge on the perpetrator of their own murders? And why would they be EVIL anyway? I mean, they seemed like perfectly nice (if a bit screamy) people when they were alive. And we never did find out who that little monkey ghost thing is which scuttles around the ceiling. The spirit of dodgy CGI perhaps. I could easily (easily) go on.
One (of many) lingering mysteries this movie leaves in its' wake is "who are the "The Messengers"?" Are they perhaps those squawky Hitchcockian crows, who flap about the film delivering no clear message of any sort? Or are "The Messengers" those confusingly nasty ghosts? Come to that, what exactly is The Message?
Anyway, my message to you - discerning, intelligent connoisseur of horror movies that you are - should be clear enough; don't waste your time on mediocrity, it'll only make you grumpy.
In the Cut
(2003)
A dark journey into the complexity of human passions
16 September 2011
"In the Cut" works pretty well on the level of serial-killer-thriller; some genuinely gripping moments and a well rounded, albeit rather predictable conclusion.
But the murder mystery stuff is not where this film really shines. Here is a love story which takes our longing for love and fulfilment and holds it up against a red brothel light. The performances are terrific, the characters are complex and the examination of our sexuality is bold and unflinching.
A hostile, seedy world is conjured in dense dream-like atmosphere, where the hope of fairytale romance grows ever more desperate. So it is all the more profound when here amongst the dark, shabby squalor we glimpse truth, purity and beauty.
But the murder mystery stuff is not where this film really shines. Here is a love story which takes our longing for love and fulfilment and holds it up against a red brothel light. The performances are terrific, the characters are complex and the examination of our sexuality is bold and unflinching.
A hostile, seedy world is conjured in dense dream-like atmosphere, where the hope of fairytale romance grows ever more desperate. So it is all the more profound when here amongst the dark, shabby squalor we glimpse truth, purity and beauty.
I Am Love
(2009)
I Am Disappointed
2 September 2011
I'm truly baffled. Not so much by the movie itself – the plot ambles along with excruciating predictability. No, what mystifies me is my friend's and reviewer's fervent reaction to "I Am Love". I just don't get it. Apart from some beautiful photography, and perfectly adequate performances, what exactly does this film offer? The characters are cold and unengaging; their motivation obscure. The "erotic" moments are so clichéd they look like parodies. The heart and soul of the film seem to be completely missing.
Really. I was amazed. You see, I'm such a sucker for emotional engagement with characters – I'll laugh, cry, hate, fear, cheer and philosophise along with pretty much any film I watch. I'm a producers dream.
But this? It washes over you and you sit (admiring the view) in the hope and expectation that something is going to happen soon. Something will surprise you. A character will suddenly come to life – reach out and draw you in. That you'll get a golden moment, or even a whiff of cinematic soul. But no. Nothing.
So – there it is. There's either something vital that I'm missing here or this emperor is indeed stark naked? I Am Disappointed.
Really. I was amazed. You see, I'm such a sucker for emotional engagement with characters – I'll laugh, cry, hate, fear, cheer and philosophise along with pretty much any film I watch. I'm a producers dream.
But this? It washes over you and you sit (admiring the view) in the hope and expectation that something is going to happen soon. Something will surprise you. A character will suddenly come to life – reach out and draw you in. That you'll get a golden moment, or even a whiff of cinematic soul. But no. Nothing.
So – there it is. There's either something vital that I'm missing here or this emperor is indeed stark naked? I Am Disappointed.
Orphan
(2009)
Authentic Gothic (but no masterpiece)
28 September 2010
Don't be put off by its' rather trashy trailer. Despite some hackneyed narrative devices and implausible plot holes, "Orphan" is a well made and genuinely creepy film.
This movie gives the impression that director Collet-Serra and his team were attempting to create something of real value - and for the most part, they pulled it off. Watch out for some great performances - the step-mother (Vera Farmiga) is complex and believable, while Isabelle Fuhrman in the title role maintains a compelling menace throughout. Checkout the superbly detailed credit sequences and numerous intelligent nods to the Great Gothic Genre.
Overlook the patchy script and story inconsistencies. And, in fact, don't watch the trailer at all.
This movie gives the impression that director Collet-Serra and his team were attempting to create something of real value - and for the most part, they pulled it off. Watch out for some great performances - the step-mother (Vera Farmiga) is complex and believable, while Isabelle Fuhrman in the title role maintains a compelling menace throughout. Checkout the superbly detailed credit sequences and numerous intelligent nods to the Great Gothic Genre.
Overlook the patchy script and story inconsistencies. And, in fact, don't watch the trailer at all.
Excalibur
(1981)
Ripping, Gripping... and essential viewing for Python fans!
27 August 2009
It's weird, but watching "Excalibur" - John Boorman's rollicking Arthurian epic - you'd swear it was the prime inspiration for "Monty Python and the Holy Grail". But you'd be wrong. The Python team came up with their movie 6 years BEFORE "Excalibur"! Monty Python and the Holy Grail (1975) vs. Excalibur (1981).
Nevertheless, load up Boorman's chivalrous romp and I guarantee the Knights Who Say Ni (et al.) references will start leaping out at you. It's like a re-make without the jokes. All this may detract from the gravitas of "Excalibur", but you'll enjoy no less for that.
All the juiciest bits of Malory's Le Morte d'Arthur are squeezed into "Excalibur", so while it occasionally feels rushed, the story gallops along with an heroic vigour.
But be prepared (especially if re-watching with fond memories); the film has not aged particularly well. The acting style looks stilted, the soundtrack (Wagner, Carl Orff - now genre clichés) is often obtrusive and the script - despite some very quotable bits - is rather patchy.
What the heck! I like "Excalibur" with its mystical mist-filled sets, its super shiny armor, gallantry and gore, dishy damsels and noble Knights of the Round Table.
Even if they DON'T dance whenever they're able.
Nevertheless, load up Boorman's chivalrous romp and I guarantee the Knights Who Say Ni (et al.) references will start leaping out at you. It's like a re-make without the jokes. All this may detract from the gravitas of "Excalibur", but you'll enjoy no less for that.
All the juiciest bits of Malory's Le Morte d'Arthur are squeezed into "Excalibur", so while it occasionally feels rushed, the story gallops along with an heroic vigour.
But be prepared (especially if re-watching with fond memories); the film has not aged particularly well. The acting style looks stilted, the soundtrack (Wagner, Carl Orff - now genre clichés) is often obtrusive and the script - despite some very quotable bits - is rather patchy.
What the heck! I like "Excalibur" with its mystical mist-filled sets, its super shiny armor, gallantry and gore, dishy damsels and noble Knights of the Round Table.
Even if they DON'T dance whenever they're able.
Angel-A
(2005)
Looks good but lacks any real depth. Shame.
20 August 2009
Warning: Spoilers
Angel-A is a change of pace for Besson; monochrome, mawkish and rather mediocre. It is well photographed on location in Paris, although subtitle-readers should note: quick-fire dialogue AND good cinematography may make for frustrating viewing.
This film is no "Wings of Desire" or "Wonderful Life". Despite its shared themes (heavenly intervention averts suicide, angel/mortal relationships ensue), Besson does nothing to enlighten or inspire us. Even the well acted, teary moments, rapidly descend into toe-curling sentimentality.
The film's flawed ideology irritates; an Angel whose message of love and respect for self is constantly undermined by her own violent and promiscuous behaviour; a "happy ending" which negates the hero's supposed journey from helplessness to self-esteem and independence.
Verdict: Quite nice to look at but confused moral and philosophical messages tarnish the film precisely where it should shine. 4/10
This film is no "Wings of Desire" or "Wonderful Life". Despite its shared themes (heavenly intervention averts suicide, angel/mortal relationships ensue), Besson does nothing to enlighten or inspire us. Even the well acted, teary moments, rapidly descend into toe-curling sentimentality.
The film's flawed ideology irritates; an Angel whose message of love and respect for self is constantly undermined by her own violent and promiscuous behaviour; a "happy ending" which negates the hero's supposed journey from helplessness to self-esteem and independence.
Verdict: Quite nice to look at but confused moral and philosophical messages tarnish the film precisely where it should shine. 4/10
Flame & Citron
(2008)
Powerful, Intense & Disorienting
24 October 2008
Based on a true story, this twisting tale of two second world war folk heroes of the Danish resistance unfolds with noir-ish intrigue. Atmospherically photographed on a fat budget, the film looks stunning but retains a gritty period realism.
The performances are universally strong and there is a real chemistry between the two central characters; Mads Mikkelsens' quirky Citronen, a twitching, sweaty bundle of amphetamine-fuelled nervous energy and his sole ally, the flame-haired, but relatively cool-headed Flammen (Thure Lindhardt).
This is a war film - but the war we experience here has a dreamlike, claustrophobic quality. This is a world of lies, paranoia and spiralling violence which threatens to erode our heroes moral certainty and destroy their sanity.
A buddy movie with echoes of "Butch Cassidy & the Sundance Kid" (without the jokes); "Bonnie & Clyde" (but with swastikas). There's even a little "Naked Lunch" thrown into the mix.
The first film I've seen by director Madsen has left me intrigued, impressed and hungry for more. Recommended 8.5/10
The performances are universally strong and there is a real chemistry between the two central characters; Mads Mikkelsens' quirky Citronen, a twitching, sweaty bundle of amphetamine-fuelled nervous energy and his sole ally, the flame-haired, but relatively cool-headed Flammen (Thure Lindhardt).
This is a war film - but the war we experience here has a dreamlike, claustrophobic quality. This is a world of lies, paranoia and spiralling violence which threatens to erode our heroes moral certainty and destroy their sanity.
A buddy movie with echoes of "Butch Cassidy & the Sundance Kid" (without the jokes); "Bonnie & Clyde" (but with swastikas). There's even a little "Naked Lunch" thrown into the mix.
The first film I've seen by director Madsen has left me intrigued, impressed and hungry for more. Recommended 8.5/10
Monster
(2003)
Monster - you've been Hollywooded!
30 July 2008
What is it about Hollywood movies? They can be really, really good - like this one - and yet, by the time the credits roll, you feel unmistakably Hollywooded; identified and labelled as "target audience", and then expertly manipulated using tried-and-trusted cinematic devises. You end up feeling slightly patronised and used.
Well, Hollywood this movie definitely is, but if you are prepared to surrender to the ride, "Monster" is an extremely effective movie. You will be told what questions to ask ("Surely Serial Killers are evil people, aren't they?"), what conclusions to draw ("Gosh - you mean given the right circumstance, even I could wind up a serial killer!"). Ultimately, you will question capital punishment and despite the grisliness of it all, you will feel the warm fuzziness of real love.
What makes "Monster" exceptional however, are the performances. Theron is especially remarkable - authentic, intense and involving. We are given just enough information to piece together the character's history and understand her motivation. We are shown just enough of her crimes to challenge our condoning of them.
The violence is deeply unpleasant without being in any way gratuitous; the lesbian love story is passionate and tender without being remotely erotic.
A well manufactured film worth seeing once. You WILL explore your empathy. Resistance is futile.
Well, Hollywood this movie definitely is, but if you are prepared to surrender to the ride, "Monster" is an extremely effective movie. You will be told what questions to ask ("Surely Serial Killers are evil people, aren't they?"), what conclusions to draw ("Gosh - you mean given the right circumstance, even I could wind up a serial killer!"). Ultimately, you will question capital punishment and despite the grisliness of it all, you will feel the warm fuzziness of real love.
What makes "Monster" exceptional however, are the performances. Theron is especially remarkable - authentic, intense and involving. We are given just enough information to piece together the character's history and understand her motivation. We are shown just enough of her crimes to challenge our condoning of them.
The violence is deeply unpleasant without being in any way gratuitous; the lesbian love story is passionate and tender without being remotely erotic.
A well manufactured film worth seeing once. You WILL explore your empathy. Resistance is futile.
The Lives of Others
(2006)
Highly recommended - a bit bleak, a lot beautiful
30 July 2008
A true gem of a movie; watch it and I guarantee the subtitles will melt away within the first fifteen minutes! "Das Leben der Anderen" is currently being remade as "The Lives of Others". Could be good; an English language version would open up this poetic and universal human story to an even wider audience. But what if the re-makers forget to remove their Made-in-Hollywood hobnail boots before stomping all over it? You see, the great thing about this movie is its authenticity and understatement. It explores its themes (political power, personal evolution, the nature of hope, compassion, integrity, loyalty...) with enormous power but also with an audience-respecting feather-light touch.
For all its subtlety, its muted palette and moderate pacing, this is a gripping and rattlingly well-told tale which unfolds with twists and turns towards a satisfying, intelligent conclusion. And, as is so often the case with a directorial debut, this film is bursting with fresh ideas and a real creative passion. Oh, and it's also very well cast with excellent performances.
Perhaps not exactly a barrel of laughs, but by the end of the film you may find your faith in humanity is repaired and your spirits lifted. Please pass the Kleenex.
For all its subtlety, its muted palette and moderate pacing, this is a gripping and rattlingly well-told tale which unfolds with twists and turns towards a satisfying, intelligent conclusion. And, as is so often the case with a directorial debut, this film is bursting with fresh ideas and a real creative passion. Oh, and it's also very well cast with excellent performances.
Perhaps not exactly a barrel of laughs, but by the end of the film you may find your faith in humanity is repaired and your spirits lifted. Please pass the Kleenex.
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