batstandards Reviews

Beyond the Rocks (1922)

This film has been rediscovered!

[18 April 2004]

This film has long been much sought after because it is the only film in which Valentino and Swanson star together. Now that this film has been newly discovered perhaps it will receive some actual reviews on here in another year or so. Once restoration work is completed along with a newly composed score it will be shown at a film festival in Amsterdam next year. The good news is that the film is in good condition except for about 2 minutes which were damaged and will need work. This film was discovered among 2000 canisters that were given to the Filmmuseum from a collector who passed away. It took several years to realize that a complete copy of the film was in the collection.

Live It Up! (1978–1990)

What bugs you?

[22 July 2003]

I loved watching this show in the 80s. It was a basically a Canadian yuppie's guide to good living (it got cancelled when Canada was entering into a recession in 1990). They had consumer tips such as what was the best way to peel a potato. My favorite part was the "What bugs you?" where a viewer would be asked to describe what their big pet peeve was (for example ziploc bags that don't close). This segment would always be preceded by a sound clip of flight of the bumblebee and a guy dressed as an annoying bumblebee running around saying "What bugs you?!". This show often featured up and coming Canadian musicians before they were popular such as The Jeff Healy Band and The Barenaked Ladies (what every happened to The Shuffle Demons? Their song Spadina Bus was featured in one episode).

Thrill of a Lifetime (1981–1987)

Because your dreams may often be for real

[22 July 2003]

I watched this show quite a bit when I was growing up. It was a staple of Canadian TV along with Bizarre and Live It Up! What I remember the most about the show was the intro which included clips of people getting to experience their dreams such as skydiving. And they had a man with a great big voice belting out a very corny and memorable theme song: "The Thrill of a lifetime is we have to give. A chance to be, a chance to see. It's the life you want to live! The Thrill of a lifetime...because your dreams may often be for real". Not an exact rendition...but went kind of like that.

Jennifer Slept Here (1983–1984)

I just saw the most beautiful ghost in the world and she slept here!

[22 July 2003]

I was 9 when I watched this show. I think I felt compelled to watch it because of the very attractive Ann Gillian who played the ghost. The title of the show and the theme song are the oddest and most unique ones I have ever seen. The show and title are from the perspective of the 13 year old boy who is the only one who can see Jennifer. I think the concept of having a sexy older woman ghost looking over you should have appealed to a lot of adolescent boy viewers (it worked for me). I still remember the song : "She lived here. She loved here, laughed here, and wept here. She slept here...." The show was both sexy and silly...a great combination.

Roberto Benigni: Tutto Dante - L'ultimo del Paradiso (2002 TV Special)

What an amazing performance!

[19 July 2003]

I watched part of this on the Italian tv station in Canada. My Italian isn't perfect but I definitely enjoyed Benigni's brilliant recital (from memory) of Dante. This is a one man show that's worth checking out.

Steel and Lace (1990)

Excellent B horror movie

[7/10 · 14 July 2003]

I first saw this movie in 1991...pretty much the same time it was released to video store. It was a little too violent for me back then and made me a bit uncomfortable (I was just a kid). I just watched it again (I bought the tape through Amazon)...and I have to admit that it has stood up pretty well. It is a rather dark story but it has some rather interesting and creative kill scenes. Also watch for the forensic detective...he has some pretty funny comments about the murders. It is a pretty original movie...definitely B grade but worth a look.

7/10

The Godsend (1980)

Absolute Rubbish!!!

[1/10 · 25 April 2003]

The film is absolutely dreadful. I had to watch it with the fast forward button. This film succeeds at doing only 2 things...it makes you want to beat up the stranger and the evil girl. The film is full of empty spaces...it could have been over in 20 minutes. Avoid this film!

Die Another Day (2002)

Competent Bond Entry...

[8 April 2003]

The golden era of Bond is long behind us. Ian Fleming is no longer here to hand pick his favorite Bond actor, and the good old days of Bond having a cool boss who happens to be a man is no longer politically correct. Now he has to have a bitchy boss who is a woman who dislikes him...his cross to bear for insisting on being James Bond in this new world. Now about the movie. The one of the greatest achievements in the movie is Madonna's cameo. I didn't even realize it was Madonna until the very last second...and the make-up artist had me convinced that Madonna was a pretty sexy...I think that makes the invisible car trick seem pretty insignificant in comparison. Pierce Brosnan does a good job as Bond as usual... But overall I got the same feeling I got when I watched his first James Bond movie Goldeneye. The pace of the movie is so action packed that Pierce Brosnan never really gets a chance to enjoy the full benefits of being Bond. I think that Halle Berry didn't do a bad job acting wise...especially since there wasn't really much time to do very much acting in this movie... between the explosions and all the gadgets and sword fighting, skydiving and CPR demonstrations... Great action movie, but to be a great Bond movie you need to slow things down a bit more and focus on creating atmosphere and intrigue. I'd like to see James Bond have to use his head a little bit more, and not be constantly jumping from one death defying stunt to the next as though he were spiderman.

Dreamcatcher (2003)

What Michael Moore really should have said...

[2/10 · 6 April 2003]

When Michael Moore said "shame on you Mr Bush"...he really should have said: "shame on you Mr Kasdan and shame on you Mr King." I really do sympathize with those who have written that this is by far the worst movie that they have ever seen. I myself can honestly say that it was the most bizarre movie I have ever witnessed in the theater. It was a movie that started of with great potential. The photography at the very beginning of the film was fantastic...then shortly after this movie dies on the toilet quite literally. This is like a big budget version of Peter Jackson's "Bad Taste"...and this movie definitely has an even worse taste than Bad Taste...it's very much like feasting on a plate of worm like creatures...however I prefer to call it making cotton candy.

The Spy Who Loved Me (1977)

The first James Bond movie I ever saw

[10/10 · 6 April 2003]

This is the very first James Bond movie I ever saw when I was a young boy. It is the movie that made me a fan. As a child, I found myself completely immersed in it and imagining that I was in the movie as James Bond. It is a very imaginative movie and definitely is a great place to start if you've never seen a James Bond movie before. A truly rare gem.

Leonard Part 6 (1987)

This movie does not deserve a bad rap

[6/10 · 28 February 2003]

I notice that Showtime plays this movie quite often...and I usually watch part of it when it comes on. I just watched the end of it. I have to admit, it is pretty watchable. My favorite Bill Cosby moments were always when he would get silly, and this has plenty of that. For a comparison, put this movie next to another notoriously reviled movie: Megaforce. Megaforce has some hilarious moments (motorbikes that launch rockets, and spectacularly laughable special effects) however the rest of the movie is painfully drawn out and could be edited down to about a half hour if they took out what doesn't work. I would say that in comparison to Megaforce, Leonard Part 6 is veritable tour de force.

Megaforce (1982)

This movie has some of the funniest moments ever

[3/10 · 28 February 2003]

I only gave this movie a 3. That's because the movie has many flaws in terms of pacing, camera work that focuses on physical actions that are not interesting. What makes this movie valuable however is the laugh factor. There are a few scenes in this movie that genuinely make me laugh so hard it hurts. Not many movies can do that. I am talking about the scenes with the motorcycles as they fire rockets...and certain special effects scenes like the motorbikes riding across the dessert emiting a colored smoke ... "The good guys always win...even in the 80s."

My Big Fat Greek Life (2003)

Possibly the worst sit-com disappointment of all time.

[24 February 2003]

I just watched the first episode of this show and it would seem that this family is cooking up something other than lamb for a change...try turkey! What worked wonderfully on the silver screen is very uncomfortable and amateurish in the context of a half hour sit-com. Emeril was probably better than this. The studio audience must not understand english because if they did they wouldn't be laughing. This TV show is to My Big Fat Greek Wedding fans what Jar Jar Binks is to fans of the original Star Wars.

Anatomy (2000)

Prepare to feel a lot better about Hollywood

[5/10 · 12 February 2003]

If you feel let down by the movies that Hollywood makes nowadays you should watch this movie because it will make you feel a lot better about some of our worst movies (ie Pluto Nash, Battlefield Earth). This movie has a clever idea for a horror movie yet completely wastes a good opportunity by giving us gifted students who act as though they are too cool for school. I found it extremely cliched that the main character had a father and a grandfather who were also medical doctors. Her nympho friend who was supposed to be the smartest med student in germany seems to come straight out of a Porky's movie. In fact the lack of character development here would be more suitable for that type of movie (Lemon Popsicle movies). The voice of the main bad guy in the english dubbed version will remind you of Emilio Estevez. Plenty of american songs in this movie in a shameless attempt to americanize it. This movie ends up being similar in tone to Skulls and Antitrust but somehow manages to be sillier than either one.

Baise-moi (2000)

Terrible sensational garbage

[2/10 · 15 January 2003]

This movie shows 2 women on a reckless downward spiral, destroying whatever is unfortunate enough to fall in their path. Both women and men are treated in a degrading manner and then are killed. Obviously life is not worth very much to these 2 women. The sex is very graphic at times, however that is not the real problem here. The problem is that there is no real motive for the way these women behave. It is not believable that these women would suddenly decide to go on a killing spree. I have would have more empathy for Freddy Kruger and Jason Vorhees together onscreen than I have for these 2 awful characters.

Undisputed (2002)

Not as good as an episode of Oz but still watchable

[14 January 2003]

Spoilers.... My friend who is a big fan of Oz said that's 2 hours he wish he could get back. I thought it was an ok piece of shallow and unbelievable fiction. I was kind of hoping that the Champ would learn something in jail that he could bring to the real world that would make him seem like a better person... the worst part was watching Peter Falk talk with more profanity than he has used in the sum total of his entire acting career...it just didn't feel right. I thought the ending with all the inmates watching the fight of the Champ on TV was pointless and crude...should have instead focused more on the Champ's character after he left jail= dull ending.

The Texas Chain Saw Massacre (1974)

Truly a seminal work

[9/10 · 12 January 2003]

This is a movie that a lot of people do not appreciate today because people they now need a great deal of gore or great special effects to impress them. However if you are a fan of the Horror genre you can't help but be amazed by how much this movie has influenced all the horror movies that have come after it. Think about the first Friday the 13th movie, Evil Dead, or more recently Jeepers Creepers. Jeepers Creepers incorporates pretty much every element, every archetype seen in the Texas Chain Saw Massacre: from collecting your victims' body parts, to wearing them. Or how about nosy teens insisting on looking where they have no business looking, and then being stalked and murdered. Texas Chain Saw remains a classic because it delivers all these essential horror elements in an unpretentious simple manner with no gimmicks. If you look at the movie from this perspective you will stand a much better chance of enjoying it.

Short Cuts (1993)

Warning: this movie is 197 minutes too long

[3/10 · 20 December 2002]

Possible spoiler = "This movie is terrible" ...I am a man, and as such I should not be expected to be able to watch a drama that lasts as long as this movie does. So I watched only parts of it...taking frequent breaks during the movie. I did catch enough of the movie to know what is wrong with it: there are too many actors in this movie...many of them relatively major actors. Too many cooks spoil the sauce and too many actors make a movie unwatchable. Also many of the camera shots are too far from the actors faces, making me squint to try and see who is in the picture. This movie would work better if it was cut into smaller pieces that were unrelated. I dislike movies that try to bring such a large cast together all of them being related in some small way...it is not entertaining, it is unfocused and unsatisfying. There is a scene at the end where Chris Penn's character kills that girl with a rock and is able to blame it on the earthquake. This scene sums up how frustrating this movie is... we don't care about this girl or the suicidal cello player...or the dead girl in the lake who the fishermen treat with less respect than driftwood (can I have another helping of misogyny please). The drama in this movie will make you long for a bad sitcom and wish that all the footage had been destroyed in the 6.7 earthquake (except for the scenes with nudity).

Star Trek: Nemesis (2002)

Everything I wanted it to be

[10/10 · 13 December 2002]

I have been watching the Next Generation since it started in 1987 and have enjoyed ever single episode. What makes this movie so enjoyable is that longtime fans have bonded with this crew. If you have enjoyed the past 15 years you will definitely not be disappointed by the latest installment. It delivers a great adventure that is consistent with the best that the series has had to offer and as such is a fitting end (?) to the Next Generation's voyages (I wish I could say the same for what has happened to the Star Wars franchise). Is this the best in the series? Well I don't judge these movies that way...so long as they are well done I'm happy. And I even enjoy them when they are not as good (Star Trek V) .

(spoilers ahead) This movie is also nice tribute to the Wrath of Kahn 20 years later. I think it was clever that Data ended up doing something to save the captain and the ship the same way that Spock did in Wrath of Kahn. It was known to me before going to see this movie that Data would die since it was part of Brent Spiner's demands that he would agree to be in another movie only if his character of Data die in it. And of course he had put his memory into his "brother" (leaving the door open for a future role) his own version of the Vulcan mind meld with Bones.

Cannibal Holocaust (1980)

Interesting and has a happy ending (some spoilers)

[26 November 2002]

I was curious to see just to what extreme this movie actually went. I was expecting it to be extreme in terms of gore...and it was at times. But I think that what is most disturbing is the evil manner in which the 4 Americans exploit and torture the "primitives" they are filming. They really deserve what happens to them at the end. So there is a happy ending (well it could have been worse)...the Good guy survives his trip in the jungle (first part of the movie) and the 4 manipulative, immoral, arrogant and trashy film makers get the justice they deserve. If you play with fire expect to get burned.

Rocktober Blood (1984)

A must see for fans of the dead rock star genre

[23 October 2002]

I found this movie by accident when I was trying to remember the name of the movie Trick Or Treat. I decided to check it out because it had a similar premise: Rock star dies and returns to seek revenge. Although it is nowhere near as good as Trick Or Treat (an overlooked masterpiece of the 80s), it is still quite funny and entertaining. (Spoilers ahead) You will no doubt notice that Billy Eye's girl does not have a scar where she was stabbed 2 years earlier. And the scene at the end where he appears to throw one of the dancer's heads in the audience could just be a wig. All the previous posts were correct in noting that the end is the best part of the movie. There is an interesting similarity between this scene and the scene in Trick or Treat where Sammi Curr appears on stage at his old High School during the dance. In both cases the crowd is surprised and pleased that the Dead Rock Star has come back to perform. Both rockers deliver "deadly" performances. Billy Eye is determined to put on a good show and he insists on hitting the last high note of the song even after being struck with an electric guitar.