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Reviews
Boa vs. Python (2004)
Wow!
I'm very surprised at how many "versus" movies there are these days. First off, let me say that I wasn't expecting too much from this movie. Considering that Boa and Python 1 & 2 were all direct to video, I was expecting this one to be along the same lines. But, it wasn't.
Right off the bat, we see the snakes--which is unusual, because in most B-rated creature features, we don't see the abnormally sized creature until at least half-way through. In this, we see the python near the beginning.
The deaths are more elaborate and bloody (one features a man being bit in half!), and the plot is slightly better. The actors are still the same: they insult our intelligence and can't act for their life.
Boa vs. Python: Rated R for violence/gore, language, and some sexuality. 1.5/5
Dinocroc (2004)
Interesting...
...In that this movie never seems to deliver exactly what it wants. I, personally, love cheap straight-to-video monster movies, but this one just doesn't satisfy enough. I was expecting Tobe Hooper's CROCODILE, but was left with the sequel. Overall, worth renting if you enjoy the genre.
1.5 (out of 5) Rated: "R" for some creature violence/gore, and language.
Summary: DinoCroc is what you get when you mix SNAKEHEAD TERROR and CROCODILE 2: DEATH SWAMP. Don't expect an oscar.
The Cabin (1998)
(One wanna be horror)+(A tired Story)=(A Waste of Time)
Okay. Where do I begin? Well, let's start with the cast. Joe nobodys. Okay, now on to the direction. Well,there are some pretty good camera angles and some mediocre chase scenes. And the story: Some kids go to a cabin in the woods to party and have fun, but run into (Gasp!) a killer! Why is he after them? I still don't know. But, was it a good movie? No. But, I would recommend it if it was to come on T.V. I guess that this movie is kind of comparable to, say, Cabin Fever (2002)--but, I warn you: It's not nearly as good as Cabin Fever. It has the typical B-Movie production, so don't expect Friday the 13th--or even Sleepaway Camp. Don't waste your money. 2/10
Freddy vs. Jason (2003)
Friday the Thirteenth Part XII
Every hard-core Friday the Thirteenth fan (like myself)knows what they want for the next one. Not in space, or in Manhattan, or even on Elm street--We want it on Crystal Lake. Don't try and fool yourself, you know that the originals were the scariest. I think New Line Cinema shoud f**k the Freddy vs. Jason 2 script and hire a really talented writer to come up with a kick-@$$ story where Jason kills at Camp Crystal Lake. The writer could continue right where Freddy vs. Jason left off (Jason burying freddy's head) and make it more like the original. Give Jason a motive to kill (like him guarding the camp). Hire a good director and cast and make the scariest da*n movie possible!