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Reviews
Moonfall (2022)
I don't know what the point was of making this movie
If the point was to entertain, it failed miserably. If the point was to develop characters you care for, it failed miserably. If the point was to tell a rather amusing story, it failed miserably.
There are people giving 10/10 to this movie. How is that even possible? A terrible CGI flick with a completely nonsensical story and you give it a 10? Right up there with the greatest achievements of cinema? Moonfall? Really?
The Matrix Resurrections (2021)
Awful. Should have just left it at the trilogy.
Lost interest after an hour and a half and don't even want to go back to finish it. Name dropping Matrix every couple of minutes, with screenshots and cutscenes from the original movie... wow. Tell me you're milking the Matrix cow without telling me you're milking the Matrix cow.
Terrible movie, terrible pacing, awful action scenes, annoying characters, dialogues that put you to sleep. And of course it has to be almost three hours. Seems like every movie these days has to be three hours, without actually having enough quality content for a 90-minute movie.
I guess editing is a thing of the past, so last century...
Skip it, it's garbage. Gave it a 2/10 only because I like the trilogy. They should have just left it at that...
Believe Me: The Abduction of Lisa McVey (2018)
Amateur acting
I honestly don't know how anyone can give this movie a 10, who are these people who gave this the maximum possible rating? Have they ever seen a good actor in their life? It's insane, the acting is so terrible and so amateur, every scene made me want to turn it off.
Bridgerton (2020)
Good lord, Netflix can really put out some of the biggest tv trash in existence
Complete and utter trash. There's nothing good to be said about this, except that I'm glad there's a stop button.
Call Me Kat (2021)
Where are the laughs?
Painfully bad and not funny at all. Someone somewhere read this script and thought it deserved a chance. I'll never understand that. Giving it 2 out of 10 just because of cats.
News of the World (2020)
Disappointment
There's 15 minutes worth of movie here, dragged out into two hours. The worst part is the movie fails miserably in making you care for the characters, I couldn't care less what happened to them. Such a below average movie, nothing to remember here.
Greenland (2020)
It's actually surprisingly good
Went in not expecting anything really but it was a fun movie. Not over the top, CGI used moderately and when needed, not boring and overly pathetic. No American heroes saving the planet yet again, just focusing on a human aspect of the catastrophy.
The Queen's Gambit (2020)
Absolute gem, best of 2020
If you're gonna watch one show this year, let it be The Queen's Gambit. A shining example how great shows can still be made without pandering to the audience with an attention span of a golden retriever, who usually like to spend half the show looking at their phones and still not missing anything important. Watch it, enjoy every minute of it because it's short and will end before you're ready to say goodbye. Let's hope there's more of similar stuff coming from Netflix cause I was seriously starting to give up on them.
Escape Room (2019)
God what an awful movie
Can anyone make a proper movie on this planet or are we out of ideas? Awful.
Oh, and the writing... At the start the black dude mentions Mr Miyagi and then mocks his employee who hasn't heard of him. "Jesus what year were you born kid." The actor who played the black dude was born in freaking 1981, he was TWO when Karate Kid came out.
Awful script, awful directing, awful movie.
The Walking Dead: World Beyond (2020)
Of course they're gonna make the teen Walking Dead
At times I wonder what the tv will be like in a few years time. The amount of horrible teen shows is beyond belief and yet there's more and more of them popping up every day. Netflix is making one after another and each one is worse than the one before. But this has to get an award for the most absurd of them all. The Walking Dead, teen edition. Who even thought about this and who approved this? Who thought this would be a good idea and does that person still have a job? Wow.
Lost Girls (2020)
Why can't Netflix make a proper movie?
It's just like almost every other Netflix's attempt to make a movie. It might have been a story worth telling but with such flat acting performances why should anyone care? Not one single character actually made me interested. What is it with Netflix, as soon as they move on from shows or documentaries and try to make a movie, it usually ends up being another flop.
Night on Earth (2020)
Narrator ruins the otherwise interesting show
I know no one can match the perfection that is Sir Attenborough, but the narrator in this show... My goodness she's bad. I don't know what they tried to accomplish here but the tone of voice and the way she tries to create atmosphere actually makes you want to watch the show on mute. Failure of epic proportions.
Otherwise it's a fun show, some great scenes, but still far from the BBC quality. I wasn't too impressed with the whole never before seen footage, it's not like night time cameras didn't exist before. Maybe these are more sophisticated but we've seen night time footage many times before.
Maybe I sound too harsh, but I just could not get over the narrator. Hopefully she won't be the voice of Netflix documentaries in the future.
The Mummy (2017)
Why?
I just want to know the answers to two questions:
1. Why?
2. Who drugged Tom Cruise and Russel Crowe before convincing them to appear in this?
Thanks.
Love (2016)
Same old not funny Apatow...
I really have been trying to figure out what exactly is it that people find funny in Judd Apatow's work and I still can't. It's just not funny, it just doesn't force one laugh out of me. None of it. How has this guy been able to create a career out of so many unfunny shows is beyond me. It's like listening to the actors say too many lines per minute and desperately trying to make it sound funny, but the material they're working with isn't helping them much.
I guess I might as well stop trying and agree to disagree with folks who like this stuff. Not everyone will find everything funny I guess, it's just sad how low the comedies have fallen. Awhile back, something like this wouldn't even be considered a comedy, let alone a "hilarious" one.
Paranormal Activity 2 (2010)
The question is - why?
The scariest thing about this movie is that they actually made it and in the end it just makes me want to ask why, oh why. While the first one was mildly innovative and provided a few scares and could actually call itself a horror movie, this one wants to be a carbon copy of the first one but fails miserably. It's a perfect example of greedy producers wanting to earn more money on account of the first movie, without actually caring what the sequel is all about or how many people who see it will feel like they've been fooled. If after all you want to see the movie, fast forward until the last 20 minutes and watch, unless you want to feel like an idiot because you just spent an hour and a half watching still images of empty rooms. Sequels... there's just something so terribly wrong about them these days, they used to actually make them for a reason.
A Nightmare on Elm Street (2010)
Why, oh why did they make this movie?
What is the freaking point of making this movie? I honestly don't understand. The only reason I gave it two stars out of 10 is because it reminded me that I have the whole Nightmare On Elm Street collection on DVD and that I should watch it again. I really wanted this to be a good movie for the sake of the original, so that new generations can see what it's all about, but no one should see this version, I really mean no one. What did they do? They took a few of the scariest scenes from the original and almost three decades and numerous generations of special effects later managed to make them look worse than they looked in 1984. Oh, and they added a few "F" words throughout the movie, I guess to make it tougher than the original. If anyone out there who is a real horror fan and wants to know what Nightmare On Elm Street saga is all about, skip this and get the 1984 version, as well as all the sequels. Even though they're not all of the same quality, every single one, even the worst one, beats this one by a mile.