jarnix-957-867652 Reviews

Everything Is Well (2023– )

Boring and too superficial

[4/10 · 1 December 2023]

I know the kind of life that family endures so it's not like I watched this without intention to feel something

But from the first episode to the last, everything seems fake. The acting is not what I expect in a series in 2023. It was more like a tv show from 1990 but with today's technology, streamed on Disney Plus.

I don't know what they expected to do with this show but it did not touch my feelings they way they could or should have.

The actress that everyone knows now for being there when you don't want to see her (she was a tv host, not really an actress, but nowadays everyone can say he or she is an actor...), Virginie Efira, is not a good choice, she's expected in bad French comedies but not when it's serious matter.

I give it a 4/10 and I'm kind because I know they tried.

Vjeran Tomic: The Spider-Man of Paris (2023)

Idolizing a criminal mind ?

[3/10 · 26 October 2023]

Even if some people might fantasize about stealing an artwork, in a famous museum, from famous artists, in Paris, I don't understand how this documentary about a criminal can have a title like a super hero movie.

The documentary is well directed, there are some interesting facts along the images that you will learn about the art mafia.

But the whole Spiderman story is just shown in the beginning of the documentary. You won't get any adrenalin from this film. The trailer makes it look this way, like a Casa de Papel in Paris, with parkour and ninjas.

The criminal has nothing of a hero. He does not even speak correctly.

This will be quickly forgot in a long list of trash documentaries.

I'm really angry about the title that is in a way promoting a criminal to a status of a superhero.

Only Murders in the Building (2021– )

The acting of Selena Gomez ruins the show

[5/10 · 22 September 2023]

This is a pretty enjoyable show to watch. It's bingeable. The two male actors are really talented, but Selena Gomez ruins the whole show with her absent acting.

I'm tired of this habit of using an actor or actress for an audience, obviously she was used as a hook for younger audiences. There are really talented actors and actresses on the market. Aubrey for example would have been a good choice.

Apart from Selena Gomez's terrible acting, I almost enjoyed the show but to be honest I quit two times to continue again because I wanted to know the end.

I hoped that her character dies somehow or gets in jail so we wouldn't see her anymore or less, but she's a bait for young adults so of course they won't make this.

I did not watch the third season, this was too much to suffer.

La belle époque (2019)

Cringe for very bad reasons

[5/10 · 10 September 2023]

If the first half of the story was enough to make me turn a little, the second had in store for me some violent retching - that is, the self-portrait of Bedos in the skin of the director, a megalomaniac dream to barely concealed by good self-mockery ("Do you think you're God? - I'm a screenwriter"), and whose actions reveal a murky fantasy: prostituting his wife.

The movie is centered too much around the director and not the "hero" himself. The way the director acts is unnerving and boring.

It should have been a relaxing movie with a beautiful story but its rhythm (everything is going too fast) and the visible conflict between the actress portraying her young wife and the director, globally an immature direction by Bedos (again it's not a movie about the hero, it's a movie about the nevrosis of Bedos)... make the movie difficult to watch, not pleasant.

I understand that he wrote this movie to make a role for his girlfriend, not for the audience to enjoy.

Would not recommend.

The Bear: Brigade (2022) Season 1, Episode 3

Like a bad documentary about people eating

[5/10 · 26 August 2023]

It was the worst episode of the season yet.

Too much b roll and useless scenes, useless shots where you see what ? Plates ! Tens of plates. You see the young Sydney (Ayo) eating tens of different plates, and that's all.

Seriously I had the impression that I was going to hear a voice off saying things about the plates all the time with poor information like what you hear on bad real tv shows.

They were probably missing things to say in this episode so they had the characters repeating themselves. It was cringe and painful to watch.

I don't know what to watch else but it's sad to see this great series failing in this season. I hope for them that it will be the last one.

The Bear: Pasta (2023) Season 2, Episode 2

Already getting boring and bad

[5/10 · 26 August 2023]

The first season was perfect. The second started okay, we feel their stress a little bit, the main actor is great as always.

The bad : The young actress, Ayo, is just not credible in her role. She's too young (she's 18 years old !?) and her confidence just does not fit with the rest of the crew and the role her character plays in the series. It was less obvious in the first season. Now it's getting ridiculous.

The shots are boring and too long, not enough things happening, many of the discussions between the characters is just boring and does not add anything.

I maybe will watch another episode because I don't know what to watch else. But this looks like the series is dead.

Babylon (I) (2022)

Overrated

[5/10 · 5 August 2023]

This movie is boring and way too long and repetitive. Margot Robbie is of course an overrated actress, unable to vary her acting, and here she plays like in the Harley Quinn movie. Brad Pitt delivers a good performance.

The costumes have no sense when you consider the time where the scenes happened : the makeup is too modern, the shoes did not have yet these very high heels, and no you couldn't show your tits, and no the red dress of Margot Robbie at the beginning of the movie is again too modern for this time. Again it's unrealistic and unbelievable.

The picture was amazing but I'm not watching a movie for the pictures only.

Everything Everywhere All at Once (2022)

Garbage with special effects

[5/10 · 12 March 2023]

I can't believe this is another movie without substance.

The scenario could have been interesting but nothing makes sense.

The whole concept is used ad nauseam to try to create a story but everything falls flat and this is just some crazy things put together.

It might have been a students film like what we did before when we were young.

The main actor is good but a little bit unnerving, the main actress is totally cringe and the way she acts is fake. Other characters are poor so no need to mention them.

Completely overrated. Yes I don't understand the positive reviews, I'm not young, I saw maybe 10000 movies, this one I will forget very quickly.

Cunk on Earth (2022)

Like Tiktok's cringe but 6 episodes

[3/10 · 31 January 2023]

The jokes are apparently written by a 6 year old child. If you enjoy all the cringe from TikTok and want to watch multiple long videos this might be for you. If you think that humor needs to be smart, this is not for you.

I appreciated the fact that I could see previews of this miserable failure of British humor (that I usually appreciate a lot) so now that it's released on Netflix I could confirm my opinion.

I expected more, I got what I saw on the previews. I'm not masochistic so I won't watch it but I wanted to see like 15 minutes to confirm what I thought.

This is what producers now produce, content that you can share with a small joke inside. Here the jokes are not funny.

Cat Burglar (2022)

Cringy and unwholesome

[3/10 · 29 May 2022]

• The whole story is basically a crime and you have to help the burglar (a cat) against a dog that might go back to the dog shelter, what an unpleasant pitch
• The main character is definitely not likable and you want the "enemy" to win, so you're tempted to answer in the wrong way
• The quiz answers have nothing to do with the story, and you have to answer to three questions in like 3 seconds so take some coffee
• The design looks like an old cute cartoon at the beginning but shows animal cruelty like rapaces eating the limbs of another animal, what sick mind would put this in a cartoon ?

Against the Ice (2022)

Tasteless and boring

[4/10 · 5 March 2022]

Dialogs are empty. Filling is plain. Storytelling is predictable. Actors are okay but of course you can only see part of their faces behind clothes. Plus features visible dog death. Not to watch.

Jungle Cruise (2021)

One of the best Disney movies !

[10/10 · 15 August 2021]

Everything was good : a perfect scenario with a lot of surprises, excellent acting and amazing direction. Truly hope this movie gets an Oscar or two.

OSS 117: From Africa with Love (2021)

Boring

[5/10 · 9 August 2021]

Not so funny than the two previous episodes, this OSS lacks humor (it was more childish, not so provocative as what you would expect from OSS), a better writing (some scenes just sound fake, or repetitive), and more rhythm (a few scenes feel like forever without adding anything to the story). The actors do their best though, Jean Dujardin is excellent as always.

I was expecting more after a lot of advertising on tv, press, online. Not worth the hype.

Lupin (2021– )

Good idea, poor execution

[1/10 · 10 January 2021]

I could not watch past the first episode.

I don't care about the story or if it's a prequel or sequel of Arsène Lupin. I'm focusing on the story, the actors, the dialogs, the story.

Dialogs are poor, actors are not involved in the scenes. The way things happen is unrealistic and I cannot believe what actors are trying to do/say.

It's like a cheap rendition of what could have been a good series. Maybe it's for children, maybe it's just to "netflix and chill", but it's not for me who wants a well written scenario (no laziness in the writing), good dialogues (that can happen in real life in the conditions the scenes happen), and actors who are not faking it like they don't care (for example Omar Sy and Ludivine Sagnier are not beginners, you would expect them to act properly in a movie).

I would not recommend it at all and totally do not understand why the series gets so much good reviews, I suspect that they might be fake.

Emily in Paris (2020– )

Full of terrible and wrong clichés

[3/10 · 5 October 2020]

I watched this series on Netflix with a lot of excitement.

However everything is wrong in this series, full of clichés that you can imagine when writing something about the ideal Paris that we all dream of. Yes it's full of cringe, full of wrong ideas about Paris, about the life here. It's poorly written, even for young teenagers that would deserve better.

I don't recommend watching the series except if you want to cringe and have a good cynical laugh.

Then go back to your everyday life, go in the metro (line 13 for example), be harassed by strange men in the streets that smell like pee, cross the path of a crack addict, and get your necklace stolen by a young migrant.

Attack the Block (2011)

Worst movie of the year because of the main "heroes"

[1/10 · 9 September 2011]

This movie was disgusting because the heroes (the people that the movie wants you to think you are so you follow the story, am I wrong about this ?) are a group of teenage criminals who steal from a girl at the beginning of the movie.

This made me want during the entire movie that the aliens kill these bastards and then invade Earth as quickly as possible.

I was expecting that the heroes were some lost kids with no future and they could have become big kids with this alien chase, but since they were always selling drugs or harassing people in the streets, I could not get interested less in their fate.

The movie was not interesting for anything apart from a few camera angles.