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Reviews
Schindler's List (1993)
What I didn't like about it
Well I just saw this movie in 2005, 12 years after it came out, for the first time. I had expected much, much better. Things I didn't like.
1. The long sequence depicting the Jews getting hauled out of the Ghetto, as Schindler watches from a hill-top on horse-back for seemingly at least a half hour (in movie running-time). Totally took the movie off course, and steered it away from the story of Schindler and his factory, and turned it into a historical account of the Holocaust (with nothing to do with Schindler). This tries to do too much at once, and is one of the reasons the movie is too long. The movie should stick to being a movie about Schindler's Jews.
2. The Germans shooting bullets upwards through the ceiling in to the rooms above, shortly after their fellow Nazi soldiers had run upstairs to root out the Jews. Made no sense. Classic Spielberg goof up.
3. Schindler kissing Helen. This came out of nowhere. Why did he walk downstairs in Goeth's "villa"? Oh, right, to get the wine. Then he just randomly decides to have a long conversation with her? The conversation was long, as is implied to be actually longer than was shown, as we see a cut in the scene at one point, and when we return, Helen is in the middle of a story she is telling to Schindler. This whole scene made no sense, and it is supposed to be some kind of turning point for Schindler (now he's sympathetic to the Jews). Just after talking to Helen? 4. Goeth's instant "transformation" into Mr. Nice Guy after Schindler talks to him, and tells him that "real power" is forgiving people or whatever. Totally unrealistic and too fast a transformation. It makes you think that either Goeth is an idiot or Spielberg is an idiot. I think it's a bit of both.
I'm not sure why it has such a high rating. Perhaps because of the emotional feelings it can induce, and because it tells a story about a horrific historical event. It is a great story, Spielberg just didn't do a great job telling it. Roberto Benigni's, la Vita e Bella is just superb. Focuses very squarely on one story, and doesn't deviate.
I give the movie a 6/10
Going the Distance (2004)
Awesome laughs
This movie has lots of laughs. Great characters, you really DO want to see them hook up and have sex. Great orgasm scenes at the farmer's house, Jason Priestly had a great cameo and "Tyler" was pretty funny while being distinctly more intelligent and less obnoxious than "Stiffler" from American Pie. Joanne Kelly's upper lip is strange...but she is hot. This movie has just enough tits and sex although there could be more and it wouldn't hurt the film. Great Canadian Rockies footage and Tofino. The West Coast hippy parents were funny. Go see this movie, especially if you are from the West Coast and if you like movies like American Pie. I'm looking forward to seeing these actors in some more great Canadian films. Hopefully we'll see more funny films filmed in Canada like this one. 8/10.
The Shape of Things (2003)
Horrible. We walked out after about 45 minutes.
Fred Weller is the worst actor I have seen in years and Paul Rudd acting as a nerd was just unbearable. One of the worst movies I have seen in a long time with well-known actors. I'm not really sure what this movie was supposed to be about. I remember a lot of arguing going on between Weller's character, Weisz's character, and Mol's character, with Rudd (as a nerd) sitting around watching. I remember Paul Rudd's character getting a nose job because Weisz's character told him to. I remember glancing around every 2 minutes at other people in the theatre wondering if I was the only one who was hating this movie. I did not see the ending so I cannot comment on it. We left after about 45 minutes.
Big Fish (2003)
Drags on, no surprises
After the first 20 minutes of the movie you can pretty much tell how the rest of the movie is going to go. The giant was the worst special effects I have ever seen, especially the scene when he first meets Ewen MacGregor's character. The perspective was all wrong. First you see the cave entrance, and it looks just a bit taller than Ewen, so at that point you expect the giant to be crouching or crawling when he walks out of the cave. Instead, he's standing straight up, implying he's the same height as Ewen. But then in the following scenes he's much taller. It was very poorly done, and that set the tone for the rest of the movie. Ewan was wrongly cast for the part I think, as he was for Moulin Rouge as well. His smile is just too corny and his teeth aren't straight.
Kill Bill: Vol. 1 (2003)
Martial arts flick
Just a good martial arts flick. Don't expect anything from the plot. The writing is weak as well, there are some really BAD lines. Many of worst lines are in the conversation between Uma and Vivica in the kitchen near the beginning of the movie. But this is topped later on by the WORST line of the movie: "Silly rabbit, tricks are for kids." What compelled Quentin Tarantino to include this stupid stupid reference form the Trix kids' cereal, I have no idea.
There are some funny parts though, like when there are about 100 men lying in blood in the restaurant/club/bar near the end, and they are moaning and rolling around. But there are stupid parts as well, like when those three guys with swords come running down the stairs at Uma, and then time she spanks the little boy with her sword. The trouble with this movie is that it doesn't know if it wants to be realistic or cheesy. It flip flops back and forth, which makes all the cheesy parts annoying. Typical QT type movie though, either you like it or you don't in my opinion.
Overall though I enjoyed the action and it was a generally entertaining movie, but because of the reasons above, I give it a 7/10.
Love Actually (2003)
Take it for what it is
This is a chick flick pure and simple, but I think guys can enjoy it too, provided they are somewhat of a romantic and at least have a significant other that you love and care about.
***SPOILERS BELOW***
First of all, it is mostly unrealistic, although not all stories turn out for the better, take Laura Linney's and Emma Thompson's for example. I think that's one of the good points about this movie, ever story doesn't turn out perfectly in the end. There is something here to appeal to everyone. Some love-at-first-sight romance (Colin Firth), some young puppy love (Liam Neeson's character's son), a wedding (Keira Knightley), a best-man/best-friend who loves the bride, an almost affair (Emma Thompson), platonic love (character: Billy Mack), an unrealistic but hilarious bit about and English guy (character: Colin Frisell), who heads to America looking for sex/love, and a funny bit about two sex-doubles in meet on the set of a movie and get married shortly after, and a charming story about the prime-minister (Hugh Grant) who falls in love with his "catering manager". Personally I thought this was the best story and I wish there was more of it. Martine McCutcheon was HOT and I got a bit annoyed that they kept referring to her as "chubby" in the movie. Hugh Grant was great in this role. Great comic interludes were provided by the Billy Mack and Colin Frisell story lines.
Some of the stories weren't as good as the others but as long as you end up liking half of them, you'll probably enjoy the movie.
9/10
The Sweet Hereafter (1997)
Don't waste a penny on this
What a waste of two hours. This was one of the most disapointing movies I ever rented. The picture you see on the cover, the man women, and baby, has NOTHING TO DO WITH THE MOVIE. And the title, "sweet hereafter", HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THE MOVIE. Don't let any of these artsy types fool you. The whole pied-piper thing has got to be the stupidest metaphor I have ever heard of. Atom Egoyan is artsy, and it thinks he is the man. Well Atom, you're not, and this movie proves it. Don't waste your money.
0/10