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Psycho Cop Returns (1993)
Not the movie I expected, and that's OK.
For a film titled 'Psycho Cop,' it absolutely was not the film I was expecting, but that's not necessarily a bad thing. This really was like a live-action Looney Tunes movie for adults. The cartoon music, the cartoon-comic acting of Psycho Cop, the goofy office workers who were all graduates of Acme Loonaversity... and then there were all the clothing-challenged sexy '90s women lol.
Barbara Niven was by far the best actor in the whole thing and was essentially in a different movie, playing everything straight. She looked gorgeous too 😍. Her performance, juxtaposed with Psycho Cop's goofy acting, made for an interesting contrast. Also, her character seemed to become the protagonist late in the movie's runtime, which is another odd element of this whole thing. Also, there were some killer 80s Hair Metal songs on the soundtrack.
It wasn't a good movie, but somehow, it all made for an entertaining mess that was fun to watch.
BONUS FUN FACT: The killer hair metal songs from the soundtrack were by a band named 'Smash Alley' - apparently, they never scored a record deal in the 80s but had a local following on the club circuit. If you search on YouTube you will find an album of theirs released in 2006.
Pared con pared (2024)
Charming Tale about Talking to the Wall
'Love, Divided' tells the tale of Valentina, a young classical pianist gearing up for a high-profile audition. As she settles into her new apartment in the heart of Madrid, she quickly encounters her neighbor, David--a reclusive, grumpy, and socially awkward inventor who detests loud noises. David occupies the apartment immediately next to hers and hasn't left the building in over three years. Complicating matters further is the paper-thin wall separating their apartments; although they can't see each other, they can speak as if in the same room.
For obvious reasons, conflict and comedic situations ensue as our two leads initially can't stand each other due to their starkly different lifestyles. What's curious is that each neighbor is currently struggling with their own outside personal issues that eventually enter their living situation. Soon enough, Valentina and David begin to fall for each other, simply by candidly conversing through the wall and finding they have much in common--all without ever knowing what the other looks like.
If you're reading this thinking, 'This sounds like a completely stupid premise for a film,' I agree--yet somehow, it works. Although it follows the common rom-com trope of two people who initially can't stand each other, it avoids the typical plot contrivances and unrelatable characters that plague many modern films of the genre, which seem to be written exclusively to socially engineer unattainable expectations for real-life relationships. The two leads of this film are relatable and have undeniable chemistry together, with Valentina, played by Pop-Singer Aitana in her acting debut, being exceptionally charming and endearing.
Euro-films generally have more artistic photography than Hollywood films, and this film is no exception, as director Patricia Font makes good use of moving camera shots to convey the idea of a relationship that exists with a wall separating the characters.
My main criticism is that the characters' early decision to avoid meeting face-to-face feels slightly underdeveloped, even when addressed through dialogue. At times, I found myself thinking, 'It's just a movie; I'll go with it.' Additionally, I felt some of the characters' decisions made in the final moments of the film strained credulity, however, I can give it a pass because I understand the symbolism Font was going for.
Overall, this slightly saccharine rom-com is more light-hearted than outright comedic, yet it manages to be relatable and surprisingly entertaining. As someone who usually works from home and is a former musician, I found both characters relatable and well-performed by the actors. I usually don't like rom-coms; however, the plot of this particular film had such a sweet, simplistic innocence to it that I enjoyed it quite a bit. 7/10
(I watched this in the original Spanish-Audio and can't speak to the quality of the English-dub.)
Repo! The Genetic Opera (2008)
Does all-singing make a movie better??
This Gothic Rock Opera's ambitious attempt at musical storytelling didn't quite work. There was no compelling reason for this film's lack of dialogue. The exclusive reliance on singing and music, in lieu of straightforward dialogue, came across as a gimmick that did not serve the story well. In other words, the story is not made better by being told exclusively through song lyrics; it is, in my view, made worse. The narrative was difficult to follow and the songs, while impressive, went on far too long. A symphonic goth/metal score that adds ambiance and supports standard narrative dialogue would have made for a much more compelling film. It's not a bad film, and I appreciate the talent involved with it on both sides of the camera, but I think they could have made some better decisions that would have improved the flow of the narrative.
Leprechaun 5: In the Hood (2000)
Bored in the Hood.
I wanted to like it, I really did, but this 90s horror-comedy about a group of up-and-coming hip-hoppers who get entangled with a sinister Leprechaun and his relentless pursuit of gold was tediously dull and hard to sit through. The characters were dry, and the story was unengaging. To make matters worse, for a movie about the music industry, the soundtrack was disappointing and uninspired. It's a missed opportunity that Horrorcore hip-hoppers "The Geto Boys' were not featured on the soundtrack, and that Bushwick Bill was not cast in the film. Other than that, the girls were sexy and nice to look at, and Warwick Davis, as always, delivered a great performance as the diabolically devilish Leprechaun fiending for his gold.
The Dentist (1996)
A Psycopathic Dentists Downard Spiral into Violent Lunacy
If you ever wanted to see a movie about a psychopathic and deranged Dentist with psychotic features who hallucinates a viciously violent episode of demented dentistry -- after he finds out his wife is bonkin' the pool boy -- this is the movie for you! Great 90s slasher that doesn't hold back and gets down to the gruesome business at hand within the first 15 minutes. Corbin Bernsen, surrounded by a stellar supporting cast, is great as the psychopathic lunatic whose bout of sinister psychosis grows increasingly disturbing in a series of creative kills playing on the real-world fears of sitting in the dentist's chair.
Road House (2024)
Is this Remake as Good as the Original?
With Doug Liman directing, Jake Gyllenhaal takes on the role that Patrick Swayze famously brought to life in 1989. This update smartly distances itself from its predecessor, attempting to carve its own identity in a landscape where classic, small-scale action movies struggle to find relevance among superhero spectacles with overblown budgets. Unlike the original 'Road House' (1989), this version only loosely resembles its source material; Liman's vision incorporates contemporary visual styles while attempting to maintain the original's spirit, a decision that mostly works in its favor given the shift in audience tastes over the years. The Florida Keys and Caribbean flavored setting serve the film well, being well-shot and visually appealing. However, the use of music falls short of memorable, with a generic score that lacks the iconic blues-rock vigor of its predecessor. Despite these ambitious decisions and attempts at modernization, 'Road House' ultimately struggles to conjure up the distinct charm and enduring appeal of its forebearer.
Jake Gyllenhaal's performance as 'Dalton' is confident and intentionally amusing; he seems to understand exactly the type of film he is in, and that saves the movie from being a complete miss. Furthermore, Conner McGregor is over-the-top and chews every scene he's in as a villainous henchman; maybe that's intentional, or maybe it's because he can't act and doesn't know any better; regardless, his performance works well for this type of material. Also, despite being severely underwritten, Jessica Williams is quite good as the bar owner who hires Dalton to clean up the local riffraff. She shares a certain chemistry with Gyllenhaal, hinting at a missed opportunity for her character to be developed as a more central figure and potential love interest.
This brings me to one of this film's biggest problems: Gyllenhaal has zero chemistry with his actual love interest in the film, played by Daniela Melchior. Melchoir was the stand-out character of 2021's 'The Suicide Squad;' her performance as the 'Ratcatcher' was the heart of the movie and probably the most memorable character of the film. However, in 'Road House', she and Dalton have zero on-screen chemistry; I didn't care about their romantic subplot at all. Their meet-cute scene at the hospital felt forced and contrived, and really, none of it made any sense. I think this was more due to the writing than to Gyllenhaal and Melchior's performances. Furthermore, the sheriff, played by Joaquin De Almeda, and the main villain, Billy Magnussen, were also underwritten with nothing much to do other than posture and leer. It would have made more sense to have fewer characters and beef up their parts; for instance, the bar owner and love interest could have been the same character.
Speaking of missing characters, I understand why they got rid of Sam Elliot's older 'Obi-Wan Kenobi' mentor character, a genre trope that sees him guide the hero and die toward the end of the second act. Elliot would have been a near-impossible act to follow, and the film likely benefits from sidestepping a direct comparison.
However, the remake noticeably lacks one of the original's most distinctive features: Dalton's background as a PhD in Philosophy. Having a highly educated protagonist in this type of action movie is a rarity and added a layer of depth and charm to the original that this film was sorely missing.
Overall, this film wasn't bad, and my review sounds harsher than it should, but I suppose that's due to disappointment from what could have been a much better film with some easy fixes. The film delivers entertaining fight scenes, and Gyllenhaal's performance is a saving grace, making it a worthwhile watch for genre aficionados; just don't go in expecting the original and watch it as its own thing.
American Gothic (1987)
Unique and Pretty Good 80s Horror
This is a decent 1980s horror movie. It's a familiar premise but nonetheless fairly well done.
The TV Veteran cast--Yvonne De Carlo of 'Munsters,' and Janet Wright of 'Corner Gas'--and off-screen kills kind of gave it a made-for-TV feel. However, the aspect ratio and direction suggest the producers had larger ambitions. I'm not sure if this film was released in theaters, but the combination of these elements gives the film a unique feel for an 80s slasher.
I'd wager this is one of the films Rob Zombie had in mind when he was making House of 1000 Corpses.
Overall, an interesting watch for fans of the genre.
Nefarious (2023)
Pro-life Demon V. Strawman Psychiatrist
It started off well enough, but the story was boring and didn't totally vibe with me, as I felt no emotional connection with the movie. Also, much of the dialogue--framed as arguments between a serial killer possessed by a pro-life demon and a court-ordered straw-man psychiatrist--felt didactic and unconvincing, playing out as authorial intrusion that became increasingly heavy-handed as the film progressed. In other words, the writers seemed more focused on telling audiences what to think, rather than encouraging them to question their worldview and possibly form new conclusions. Subtle this film was not; regardless, there was some hilarious over-the-top acting on display; watching Sean Patrick Flannery chew the scenery as he barked out platitudes had an entertaining quality to it that kept me watching.
Bullet to the Head (2012)
Hills Hard-Boiled Direction Saves the Day
Walter Hill delivers this hard-boiled thriller featuring a hitman and a cop -- played by Sylvester Stallone and Sung Kang -- who form an uneasy alliance to take down a corrupt businessman and an organized crime ring.
The story, based on the French graphic novel Du plomb dans la tête, is engaging and well-written, and the film features an impressive cast that includes Christian Slater, Jason Momoa, and Sara Shahi. A film of this pedigree should have fired on all cylinders; however, after a promising set-up, the film begins to putter along. The two leads have little chemistry and perform better in their solo scenes when interacting with the supporting characters. Kang, in particular, seems miscast in the role, and the attempts at '80s-style non-pc buddy-cop humor fall flat due to his lack of chemistry with Stallone.
Regardless, Hill's stylized noirish direction and the strong supporting cast, punctuated by a bluesy score set against an atmospheric New Orleans setting, all serve the story well and make a decent watch for fans of the genre. 7/10.
Dead Heat (1988)
Unique and Interesting Concept
Unique and interesting concept that could have used a slightly improved script, but overall, it's still a decent film. Great 80's action movie shootouts. The makeup and special effects were top-notch.
Treat Williams was great, Piscopo, not so much. He worked with what he had, which was not the best-written dialog, and he didn't have the chops to rise above it like the rest of the cast. Some of the one-liners were not that funny and badly delivered.
The location of 80's Los Angeles was a character in itself and for locals like me, a nostalgic trip back in time.
The ending action scene was also impressive. 6/10.
WolfCop (2014)
Pretty Good Movie!
It's an engaging story with solid action scenes, great creature effects, and an appropriate, if maybe generic, musical score.
Leo Fafard and Amy Matysio gave solid performances as the Wolf-Cop and his partner, better than what you usually get in this type of schlock. Sarah Lind as Jess was great too. Some of the other villains, however, could have been a bit more menacing. Also, I picked up on some Edgar Wright and Simon Pegg influences behind the camera, and I mean that in the best way possible.
My only other criticism is that the pacing felt off. Most notably, it took far too long for the Wolf-Out to come. He didn't fully transform until well past the halfway mark, which was about 30 minutes too late. It would have worked better at the start of Act 2; I feel this would have made for a more engaging film that lives up to the premise. I suspect this decision was driven by budgetary constraints due to the costs of the creature effects.
Other than that, did we really need a Werewolf sex scene??
Fun Watch. I'm looking forward to watching the sequel.
Silent Rage (1982)
Uninspired Psuedo-Slasher Cop film falls flat
"Silent Rage" (1982) opens with a premise that, in more capable hands, might have woven a tapestry of intrigue and thrill. Yet, as the film unfolds, one can't help but feel the touch of uninspired direction, a blandness that permeates through the first two-thirds of its runtime. Furthermore, until the final act, the film's atmosphere, or rather the lack thereof, leaves much to be desired-a tone unestablished, a mood uninvoked.
However, at the heart of its struggles lies a script crying out for vigor, for a punch of life that never comes. Supporting characters, such as the love interest and Norris's partner, are just yearning to be fleshed out and brought to life. As for Norris himself, his performance is bland and wooden, and there was no real reason for him to be in it since it wasn't a martial arts film.
And then, there are the love scenes. Oh, the love scenes. Were audiences in 1982 really asking for Chuck Norris love scenes, where he romances the ladies? In a film grappling with identity, these scenes feel like a misguided attempt at tenderness, that Norris doesn't have the depth to convey, and play out barren of emotional authenticity. One wonders why Norris was chosen for a role that strays so far from his known forte.
The film's moments of redemption come in the final act, which finally manages to establish an atmosphere that smacks of dread and a touch of suspense. It's almost as if these closing scenes were the work of another director.
I believe if this film had been directed by more capable hands, such as John Carpenter or Walter Hill, and starred someone with Norris's physicality but more charisma - Carl Weathers or Dolph Lundgren come to mind - paired with a solid character actor for the partner role, this could've been 🔥.
Fair Game (1986)
The Most Dangerous Game is a Sexy Game Warden
Fair Game (1986) - Awesome 80's Australian Action-Thriller film. It's often referred to as a "rape and revenge" film like I Spit on Your Grave (1978), however, I think it has much more in common with films like The Most Dangerous Game (1932) and Surviving the Game (1994).
In this film, a very attractive game warden running a wildlife sanctuary in the Australian outback is caught in the crosshairs and pursued by local kangaroo poachers bored with hunting wildlife.
One thing that makes this film great is the main character, played compellingly by the sexy Cassandra Delaney, is no pushover or damsel in distress; she gives the hunters more than they bargained for from the minute she is confronted by them. As the film goes on, Delaney's vengeance against her tormentors grows increasingly violent as the hunted becomes the hunter.
The performances by Delaney, along with the trio of scumbags hunting her, are all well-suited for this type of film. The monster-truck-sized off-road vehicle - named 'The Beast' and driven by the hunters - becomes a character in its own right; managing to steal the entire picture in the film's most infamous and memorable scene, prominently featured in the marketing material.
Additionally, the photography is excellent, showcasing dynamic backlit shots of 'The Beast' pursuing Delaney through the outback at night in scenes visually reminiscent of Razorback (1984) and The Road Warrior (1981), Australian films the producers were surely influenced by.
Great film overall. 7.5/10.
Fear the Night (2023)
People succeed in spite of their trauma - not because of it
Action/Suspense/Thriller home-invasion film written and directed by Neil LaBute and starring Maggie Q. The movie revolves around Tess, an Iraq War veteran and a recovering alcoholic, who returns home to attend her sister's bachelorette party at their family farm. The film takes a dark turn when a group violently invades the party, and Tess has to use her military training to protect herself and the other women from the violent assault.
LaBute stumbles into the common pitfall of romanticizing PTSD. Tess, like many of our real-life service members, unfortunately suffers from it, but the film falls into the cliché of presenting its symptoms as beneficial. In the movie, Tess's PTSD symptoms, such as heightened suspicion and strong startle response, coincidentally align with the actual threat present at the bachelorette party. This narrative choice can suggest that her trauma has somehow prepared her for this extreme situation. In reality, PTSD is a complex and often debilitating condition. It can manifest in various ways, including hypervigilance, flashbacks, and avoidance behaviors, all of which Tess presents with in the film. However, it does not work as the sort of "sixth-sense" often implied in films, including this one, and is something people have to work hard at to overcome. In other words, in real life, people succeed despite their trauma, not because of it; this film has that backwards.
Despite these criticisms, the performances from the entire cast were good. The action scenes, although sparse, were solid and suspenseful, with LaBute's skill in crafting suspense seeing the film approach an ominous horror-like atmosphere. Anything with Maggie Q is always worth a watch, and not just because she's gorgeous; she's a phenomenal actor and her presence elevates any film she's in. It's a shame that LaBute didn't tap deeper into her martial arts skills and athleticism, which could have greatly added to the film's fight scenes. This film would have been a perfect showcase for them, and their inclusion would have only made a decent film better.
Overall it's a good one-time watch for fans of the genre. 6/10.
30 Monedas (2020)
The Sinister Mystery and Malevolence of 30 Coins
30 Coins is an enthralling Spanish mystery horror series created by Álex de la Iglesia for HBO Europe. The series follows Father Vergara, an exiled priest and former boxer, trying to escape his mysterious past by living in exile in the remote, rural village of Pedraza, Spain. Despite his best efforts, Vergara's former life refuses to remain buried, as sinister forces and old enemies come back to haunt him. As supernatural chaos and horrific happenings consume the village, Vergara forms an unlikely alliance with the towns Mayor and the local veterinarian. The trio soon uncover the malevolent force behind the horrific chaos: an ancient religious cult, hell-bent on reclaiming the infamous 30 Coins paid to Judas Iscariot for betraying Jesus to the Romans.
The first two episodes launch the series with a chilling exorcist-style horror-story of demonic possession; however, the show soon broadens its horizons, lurking into the murder-mystery genre with episodes that smack of the The X-Files. Several episodes later in the season even venture into globe trotting, Indiana Jones-style searches for ancient relics in far-off lands.
As typical with many shows out of Spain, the show ventures into soapy-telenovela love drama, and in this case, it's highly-effective; I actually found myself drawn into the will-they-or-won't-they subplot that pulsated throughout the season.
Yet, despite its forays across genres, 30 Coins never loosens its grip on the unrelenting horror and menacing tone, maintaining an undercurrent of supernatural malevolence as sinister as it is unsettling.
Eduard Fernández delivers a powerful performance as the tormented Father Vergara, while Megan Montaner brings a compelling mix of strength and vulnerability to her portrayal of Elena. Miguel Ángel Silvestre lends a Clark Kent-esque charm to the village's reluctant mayor, his performance underscored by a palpable sense of uncertainty.
Álex de la Iglesia's direction, paired with the evocative cinematography of the small, rural village that dates back to medieval times creates an eerie and ominous atmosphere, seeing the village itself emerge as a character steeped in shadows and secrets.
Paul Giamatti joins the cast for Season 2.
30 Coins gets an 8 out of 10.
Napoleon (2023)
It was OK but messy - Maybe the 4-hour cut is better?
I went in wanting and expecting to like it but came out thinking it was a disjointed mess.
I did like Joaquin Phoenix and Vanessa Kirby as Napoleon and Josephine, and the battle scenes, although sparse and lacking context, were visually impressive. Regrettably, this is where the luminosity of the film dims. The rest of the cast is never given an opportunity to perform or bring their characters to life. Most are not even mentioned by name in the dialogue. For example, Arthur Wellesley, the Duke of Wellington and the man who brought Napoleon to heel at the Battle of Waterloo, is introduced at the beginning of Act 3 with an on-screen title card--very lazy storytelling.
The film vacillates between the intimate drama of Napoleon's tumultuous marriage and abrupt, though strikingly vivid, battle sequences. Yet it fails to stitch these disparate scenes into a coherent narrative. It never delves into any of the social reforms or policies that Napoleon implemented and reshaped Europe, nor does it explain the sociopolitical causes behind the battle scenes. Furthermore, it fails to show what a brilliant and charismatic leader Napoleon was or to justify why his troops were so loyal to him.
The film also completely glosses over his time spent on the island of Elba. In fact, if you're not familiar with Napoleon's history, you might not even recognize that sequence of events and why his troops rallied around him to help him regain power. It was all very strange and bordered on incoherent, as if Scott, burdened by the runtime, chose to excise the soul of the story, leaving only the skeleton of historical events.
The production value is great-the sets and costumes looked amazing and, despite lacking context, the battle scenes were well-shot and looked great on the big screen.
Ridley Scott has mentioned in interviews that he has a 4-hour director's cut that will be released when the film goes to streaming. I'm hoping the additional runtime adds the much-needed historical context about the sociopolitical environment in Europe at the time and doesn't just pad out the runtime with more marital drama.
◼TL;DR: Despite being visually impressive and the strength of its two leads, Napoleon is a jumbled mess of a story that borders on the incoherent.
6.5 out of 10.
Una pistola per cento bare (1968)
Decent film that hits most of the usual genre beats and tropes
Pistol for 100 Coffins (1968) Italian-Spanish Spaghetti Western written and directed by Umberto Lenzi and staring Peter Lee Lawrence as a conscientious objector who refused to fight for the south in the Civil War. Now newly released from prison, Lawrence takes up arms to deliver cold vengeance on the gunmen who murdered his family.
Not a bad movie, but if you've seen a lot of spaghetti's, you've essentially seen this one too. Indeed, Pistol for 100 Coffins checks off most of the usual story beats and genre tropes:
Man released or escapes from the law ✅ Quest for Revenge ✅ Stolen Cash or Gold ✅ Older Gunfighter Mentors a Younger Hothead - ✅ Incredible Photography ✅ Amazing Score ❌
Perhaps the films biggest drawback is the lack of a score written by il maestro, Ennio Morricone, legendary composer of Sergio Leone's films. A Morricone score would've brought this film to the level of Death Rides a Horse (1968), a better film with a very similar story.
For fans of spaghetti's this one is worth a watch, just keep in mind that if you've seen Death Rides a Horse or Leone's films, you've seen this story better told before. 6.5 out of 10.
Headless Horseman (2007)
Good Story marred by Bad Acting
Released in 2007 and directed by a pre-Sharknado Anthony C. Ferrante, "Headless Horseman" is a modern-day re-imagining of Washington Irving's classic horror folk-tale, "The Legend of Sleepy Hollow." Although it has a creative and imaginative story, the film is severely marred by poor performances.
The plot unfolds on All Hallow's Eve, when seven college students en route to a party, decide to take a shortcut and wind up in the "lost" eerie town of Wormwood. According to local legend, 100 years ago a madman kidnapped and violently tortured some kids until the townspeople took matters into their own hands and beheaded him. Now, he returns every seven years as the Headless Horseman to exact revenge by taking the heads of seven new victims. Our unsuspecting newly-arrived college visitors soon find themselves being hunted down one-by-one as the legendary figure seeks his vengeance.
I understand that in these lower budget b-movies, rookie actors will do rookie acting that is not always the best, and I take this into consideration when rating movies. However, even with that in mind, the acting in this was just bad. Even the more experienced cast members like Richard Moll delivered cringe-performances. Rebecca Mozo, an actress I've never seen before, was the one standout and did a good job."
In terms of visuals, the effects and creature design for the headless horseman were good, especially considering it was made in 2007. There are some cool atmospheric and intimidating shots of the Headless Horseman who's physical appearance slowly and creepily changes throughout the film. Other than that, the cinematography and music are mostly forgettable.
Overall, for fans of schlocky-horror movies, "Headless Horseman" can be an entertaining watch if you can get past the acting. 6/10.
Wolfen (1981)
Early 80's NYC Horror Film with Social Commentary
Early 80's pseudo-werewolf film Directed by Michael Wadleigh about a serial killer that turns out to be a pack of alpha-predator wolves loose in NYC. The movie attempts to tackle pressing social issues such as habitat loss and class consciousness through the lens of a horror narrative.
Albert Finney delivers a strong performance as a former NYC cop, while Gregory Hines steals every scene he's in with his energetic and charismatic performance. The film makes excellent use of 1980s NYC locations, which range from dilapidated buildings-destroyed by urban blight and resembling post-war Vienna-to a suspenseful scene atop the Manhattan Bridge. These locations essentially become characters within the film.
The film ambitiously addresses a range of themes, including urban decay, gentrification, and social inequality. However, the film's impact is partly undermined by its reliance on dated and stereotypical tropes, such as the "mystical Native American," which honestly took me out of the story and sullied the viewing experience for me.
One aspect of the film that intrigued me most was the movie's influence on later films. Its portrayal of an almost invisible predatory force stalking humans as prey has clear echoes in later works like Predator (1986) Predator 2(1990) and I come in Peace (1990). Also notable is the innovative use of subjective camera angles and filtered shots to represent the creature's point of view as it stalks it's human prey; a technique we will see echoed a few years later in the aforementioned Predator films.
While Wolfen has its drawbacks-chiefly its use of outdated cultural stereotypes-its strengths in acting, atmosphere, and setting, coupled with its impact on later cinema, might make it an interesting watch for both horror fans and cinephiles.
Wolfen gets a 7/10.
Old Dads (2023)
Bill Burr's stand-up comedy in narrative form.
Bill Burr's directorial debut is essentially a live-action film version of his stand-up comedy routines.
The main characters, played by Burr, Bobby Canavale, and Bokime Woodbine, are a trio of Older-Gen-X dads who are now fishes-out-of-water in the modern era, dealing with millennial CEO's who think they're Steve Jobs, nosy neighbors, and entitled white women. If you're a long-time fan of Burr's you've heard all these jokes before and, in my opinion, making fun of Millennials and Zoomers seems to work better as standup material than narrative comedy.
Still, the movie has some good laughs and fans of Burr will surely like it.
Trespass (1992)
Underrated Film from Underrated Director Walter Hill
Walter Hill, one of cinema's most underrated auteur directors, is completely in his element directing this early '90s hyper-masculine tale about two firemen who cross paths with an inner-city gang while searching for stolen gold in an abandoned building.
William Sadler and Bill Paxton deliver strong performances as firemen bitten by greed, unraveling in a manner reminiscent of the classic Bogart film Treasure of the Sierra Madre (1948). Meanwhile, hip-hop legends Ice-T and Ice Cube offer intense and captivating performances as King James and Savon, the leaders of an inner-city gang.
Paxton and Sadler's characters enter the story with a get-rich-quick mentality that places them in a perilous situation, revealing their greed and perhaps naivety. King James and Savon, on the other hand, are deeply entrenched in criminal activities, but their characters are not reduced to mere antagonists. They have motivations, objectives, and even moments that humanize them.
As is common in Hill's films, "Trespass" commits to showcasing complex, often morally ambiguous characters rather than clear-cut heroes and villains. Indeed, it's difficult to know who to root for. A more heroic character does gradually reveal himself by the film's end, and it's likely not who the audience expects.
One aspect of the film that really struck me is its early use of "found footage" and "confessional video" in mainstream cinema. While most of the film is shot traditionally, there are several scenes the audience views through the "video camera" of one of King James's "associates", who is recording the gangs actions within the film. Although I generally dislike Found Footage, in this film it was used sparingly and to great effect, as a way to get inside the world of the characters. I do not believe that Hill's name is mentioned when discussing influential found footage films.
In my humble opinion, Trespass, and Walter Hill's filmography more generally, are both highly underrated and deserving of a closer look.
I give Trespass an 8/10.
Totally Killer (2023)
More of a Mildly Amusing Mystery than Slasher-Comedy.
Although it's being marketed as a 80's style Time-Traveling Slasher-Comedy, it's actually more of a Mystery-Whodunnit sprinkled with 80's slasher elements and some mildly-amusing moments.
The 80's aesthetic was pretty cool and largely worked, from its production design to its wardrobe, although one character looked more like a 90's Jared Leto than a 1987 high-schooler.
The acting was pretty good too, with most of the cast doing the best they could with what they were given. The music and cinematography were serviceable, although neither really stood out.
The movie's biggest shortcomings, however, were it's attempts at comedy. The script could have used a rewrite by an experienced comedy writer, as despite a couple of humorous moments, much of the comedy was nowhere near as funny as it wanted to be.
Also, the ending reveal of the killer's identity and motivation was lackluster and unsatisfying, it didn't really feel like there was much of a pay-off.
Despite it's shortcomings, it's not a terrible film and entertaining enough.
Worth a watch for fans of Time-Travel movies or 80's slashers, just keep your expectations low going in.
I give it a 6/10.
Who Is Erin Carter? (2023)
Mid-Level "meh" from Netflix.
The first 3 episodes of this Netflix series were a slog to get through, with characters I couldn't connect with and a narrative that was too light on suspense and action. However, once I made it to Episode 4 and the backstory unfolded, the show suddenly gained more focus and energy.
And that is where I feel like the show screwed up.
I understand that it can sometimes be suspenseful and intriguing to withhold information from the audience; however, in this show, it didn't really work. It made Erin seem like a bumbling-mess who makes bad decisions and gets caught up in petty disputes with her posh, nosy neighbors.
Had they started with episode 4 we would have better understood Erin's predicament and sympathized with her.
In terms of production, the sets and locations were impressive throughout, and the actors delivered commendable performances. Episode 6, in particular, stood out for its costume design, location photography, and fight choreography.
Overall, it was just fine. I gave it a 6.5 out of 10.
El club de los lectores criminales (2023)
OK flick about some Not-So-Creepy Killer Klowns
College kids who are also aspiring writers get picked off one-by-one by some Killer Klowns in this Netflix original.
Had some good ideas, some cool kills, and at times even conjured some Wes Craven vibes, but a lot of it was predictable. The problem is when you've watched a lot of movies you can start to tell where the beats fall, and for this particular film, some of the foreshadowing was a little too on-the-nose and it kind of gave away the plot.
Also, I don't particularly find clowns scary and if one was running toward me, I'd just hold out my fist and let him run into it.
Regardless, it's an entertaining movie if you like Slasher flicks and creepy clowns.
I give it a 6 out of 10.
Ninja III: The Domination (1984)
This is pure CINEMA!
This is the greatest piece of cinema ever put on film! Anyone who disagrees with me is wrong. Truffautt? HOGWASH! Speilberg? BALDERDASH! Hitchcock? FORGET ABOUT IT!
Sam Firstenberg has cemented is place as the greatest auteur in cinematic history with this 1984 epic masterpiece.
This movie has it all:
- Fights on a Golf Course
- Ninja Magic
- Eye-Patch wearing ninjas
- and most of all..a strong female lead in 1984...this movie was simply ahead of its time.
Remember folks, only a Ninja can defeat a Ninja!
Also, Sho Kosugi's eye-patch won the Academy Award for Best Actor and was well deserved.