HorrorInsideUsAll Reviews

Death House (2017)

Umm?

[1/10 · 15 June 2019]

So I just finished watching this and I'll be honest.... I had to jump forward A LOT throughout Death House because I was so bored and just wanted it to be over. Yes, I could have just stopped watching it, but I was determined to get through it, even though it caused so much pain, from laughter.

I love Gunnar Hansen (RIP), Kane Hodder, Bill Moseley, Sid Haig, etc, BUT Death House was such a complete mess. I wanted to like this and the concept was there, but the execution was a total disaster, to say the least.

Gehenna: Where Death Lives (2016)

WTF?

[16 December 2018]

I really don't have too much to say about this flick. I feel bad for Doug Jones, whom I am a big fan of. The RIDICULOUS effect of Jones' being EXTREMELY emaciated was a huge, HUGE miss and extremely laughable. I had to go back to it a couple of times because I couldn't stop laughing. What an insult to such an incredible actor and did not need that joke of a prosthetic.

As painful as it was to sit through, with all of the terrible acting and everything else that followed, I had already invested my time into it with the hopes it was going to be a fairly decent flick. Man was I ever wrong.

The idea was there, but as I said, this was a huge miss so don't waste your time.

Unsane (2018)

Unsee Unsane

[13 November 2018]

What a MAJOR disappointment Unsane was. I was going into it under the assumption that I was going to be at least a little impressed. Well, that didn't happen. And were we as an audience supposed to be blown away by the fact that the entire movie was shot on an iPhone? I don't think so. It made student films look more inviting. And how cheesemo were the end credits? Matt Damon and Joshua Leonard should be ashamed of themselves for taking part in this. If you haven't seen this, DON'T bother.

Death Note (I) (2017)

Death Notegasm

[25 August 2017]

When I got the notification on Netflix for the release date for Death Note I was extremely ecstatic, that week took forever to get here. I just got done watching this film and OMFG I loved it.

I am a huge Adam Wingard fan and I absolutely loved his adaption. From beginning to end I was engrossed in this film. The effects were outstanding, especially Ryuk (how friggin cool was he!). The acting was spot on and funny at all the right moments. It wasn't about the blood and guts, so with what there was, it was perfect.

I added this to my Netflix list and I will DEFINITELY watch it again. And I will/would definitely recommend Death Note as a must see! The ONLY reason why I didn't give this an {honest} 10/10 was because I actually awed out loud at when the credits started popping up...I wanted it to keep going!

AWESOME job, Adam Wingard... PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE make a sequel!!

Demonic (2015)

Love, Love, Love

[6/10 · 11 August 2015]

I'm not going to give any spoilers away. All I will say is this is a MUST see.

I love/loved this movie and anything with James Wan's name attached to it. I'm almost embarrassed to admit that a few scenes made me jump (and that is VERY difficult to get me to do). It just goes to show you don't always need blood and guts to make an intense horror flick. This is also one to watch in the dark. *winks*

Kudos to Will Canon. I hope you direct more movies this like in the future. This is definitely one for my collection so I can have to watch over and over again.

Bloody Murder (2000 Video)

smh

[1/10 · 7 August 2015]

I wish I could rate it a -10. I could only get through 25 minutes of this movie before I had to shut it off. Not only does this movie completely rip off Friday the 13th, but it's so freaking dull and utterly laughable. John Stevenson should be ashamed for writing this garbage and Ralph Portillo should be embarrassed for directing this.

I'm saddened that my daughter actually bought this and the sequel (of which I will NEVER watch), but this is the kind of stuff she likes. I like some indie stuff, but this is just ridiculously STUPID.

Acting - sucks

Sound Effects - sucks

Visual Effects - sucks

Bloody Murder - SUCKS!

Unfriended (2014)

Well Done!

[31 July 2015]

I have to admit, I went into this movie thinking the worst, but I came out pleasantly surprised.

I've read many reviews all over the net stating how terrible Unfriended was. Telling others not to bother watching it because it was a waste of time. The only time wasted, in my opinion, was reading all the negative reviews instead of watching this flick sooner than I had. Also, in my opinion, this movie deserved the kind of attention that It Follows got.

Will I get it for my DVD collection? More than likely. Unfriended was one of the better 'found footage' movies that has been put out there in a long time.

The Rage (2007)

I was giving this movie the benefit of the doubt,....

[1/10 · 28 July 2015]

..... but after just 30 mins I had to stop watching it. I can't believe there was a $2M budget for this movie, what a waste of money. This is something you would expect to find on Syfy because zombie vultures? SERIOUSLY? SMH! I don't know how it ends and quite frankly I don't care either. It's truly laughable.

I can't believe I actually hunted and hunted for this movie to check it out and I could rant on and on about how HORRIBLE this movie is/was, but it's wasted enough of my time already. If you haven't seen this movie, DON'T bother. You would be better off punching yourself in the face for entertainment!

The Crying Dead (2011)

My Two Cents

[3/10 · 28 July 2015]

So I started watching this for the first time this morning. I have to just say right off the bat, anyone who is familiar with the former Linda Vista hospital in Los Angeles then you would immediately recognize the shots outside of the hospital, it's a very iconic building. The same year this movie came out is when AMCAL Multi-Housing Inc. bought the building and renovated it into apartments. That is one of a few reasons why that scene was filmed out back of the hospital, since in this movie the hospital goes by a different name. I kinda giggled when Chris' character said it was "in a remote region of the northern California wilderness".

Yeah The Crying Dead was OK, but I wish someone would really kill (no pun intended) it with a ghost investigation movie.

All Hallows' Eve (2013)

Uhhhh, What The Hell?

[1/10 · 31 October 2013]

I'm just going to jump right into it. If I could give it a -10/10 I would, but I'm forced to give it at least a 1. Words cannot describe how God awful this 'movie' was. I've seen my fair share of TERRIBLE movies, but Holy Mother of God. That is 82:55 (the rolling of the credits included) minutes of my life that I will NEVER get back. I'm going to break down my reason behind my rating. But I'm just keeping them short and sweet.

The acting was horrible. I'm sure there are better actors in porn than in this movie, bottom line. Nothing more can be explained to describe how horrible it was. But I did read somewhere that a 'PRO' for this movie was that it has a "solid cast". Um, really? I'm not sure what movie they saw, but it surely wasn't the same one I just got done watching.

Babysitter gets back from taking two kids (brother and sister) trick or treating. One of the kids finds a VHS in his candy sack. After a few minutes they talk the babysitter into playing the tape and this is what was on it.....

What the hell was up with the subterranean humanoid in the first short and the Devil with his minions?! The Devil's hangout (lair) is in a subway tunnel? And what was the reason for the pregnant woman? The Devil can only drink the blood of a woman who is with child? What was the purpose of this short to begin with. I didn't get it! By the way, the clown was in the beginning of this short!

Killer clown... from outer space? Might as well been. Which brings me to the, holy crap alien short! REALLY? Oh I can move my arms in a wave pattern, so that must make me an alien type creature! (that is exactly how the actor moved when the female character first got a look at the alien) And the costume designer couldn't be more original with the alien? Of course not. She had to go Area 51 on our asses with the alien breathing apparatus design. *rolls eyes* The clown was featured in this short as a painting.

Then there was the short with the typical pretty, young girl lost somewhere in a remote town, car is on empty, but luckily she spots a gas station! Wow, never heard this before! The only cool part of this was when the clown showed back up and was cutting the attendant into pieces. Well, then the clown takes the girl, cuts off her arms and legs and carves degrading names on her body... why I'm not sure. But okay?

This brings me to the actual plot of the movie.....

This movie, to me, played out like The Ring. Watch the video of shorts and the clown will find his way into reality and kill you. Which he does, by killing the two kids! *snores*

Thank you for giving us one of the MOST BORING movies that ever could have been made. I'm sure the entire crew (all 11 of ya) and the entire cast (all 11 of ya) appreciated the paycheck from this one! Kudos!

The Burrowers (2008)

In a Nutshell....

[6/10 · 24 August 2013]

Here is a cliff notes version of my review....

At first I was leery about a Horror movie based in the 'old west', but as I read some of the reviews, I decided to give it a chance. After the opening scene (which had me pondering with what had just attacked them), it dragged for a bit (for me anyways) and I was wondering when it would pick back up again. Had some so-so gun fights, some nice, bloody scenes. But then we finally got to see the 'burrowers' and I was REALLY disappointed. Had they not looked like overgrown, mutated grasshoppers, then I might have liked the concept of an underground, burrowing creature. The story behind the burrowers was just okay at best, with how they feed. Cut them, 'puke' in the wound to paralyze them, then bury them (alive) until they start to rot before eating them, lovely.

As my summary states "In a Nutshell".... I gave this movie a 6 based solely on the acting and what blood there was that we got to see, very little. I can't say that I will be adding this to my DVDs anytime.... period. It was okay one time around, but that's about it for me.

Frankenstein's Army (2013)

Zombots!!

[7/10 · 5 August 2013]

Okay...

The only reason I watched this movie was because of the recent cover of Fangoria and the article intrigued me. I gave this movie a 7/10 because the POV / found footage concept was far from having the realistic feel to it and the acting was only so-so. BUT! The zombots were pretty frickin' awesome, minus the walking Nazi yoga ball, the female zombot who reminded me of the Oola from Return of the Jedi and the Robo Cop looking one. The gore aspect was very well done, but I'm up in the air on if I will be adding this to my DVD collection down the road. I'll have to watch it again to see how I feel about it the 2nd time around. But that's just me personally.

The Conjuring (2013)

A Paranormal DO!

[30 July 2013]

I just saw this film today and already I want to buy it on DVD, TODAY! I am beyond words with how impressed I was with this film. There wasn't one thing I didn't like about it, not one. The cinematography, brilliant. The acting, excellent. The effects (for what there was), fantastic. Very rarely do I get the chills from a paranormal film, but damn, The Conjuring gave me so many goosebumps!

I absolutely LOVE James Wan and all of his works. The man is a GENIUS. GREAT job on this film!

In short, The Conjuring, to me, is worth repeated viewings at the theater and be worth every penny, every time. I HIGHLY recommend those who have yet to see this film to go see it, NOW! You won't be disappointed.

Simon Says (2006)

What The Hell Did I Just Watch?

[1/10 · 12 January 2013]

I just got done watching this movie On Demand and my review can honestly be summed up in one word - crap.

I wasn't sure what to think of Simon Says at first. I really thought I was going to like it, but I couldn't have been more wrong about myself and this so-called Horror flick. I've seen my share of 'B' movies, but this one was the epitome of one and it stereotyped Horror (80's Horror at that) almost to a tee - the stoner, the promiscuous chick, the nerd and the couple.

There is not one positive thing I can say about Simon Says, other than thank God for On Demand, so I don't have to worry about having a cheesy DVD collection of Horror movies.