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Cat Person (2023)
Everything you'd expect from a movie that opens with a Margaret Atwood quote
The movie starts out with a typical guy meets girl in the age of social media.
The girl's best friend is a frustrated feminist who urges her to destroy her relationship with the guy and she's weak enough to let her do it for her (and not in a nice way).
Being a movie with a dead horse to beat, it meanders along until the third act (finally) arrives with a scenario where the man is the bad guy, despite the girl doing some super creepy things herself, like breaking into the guys house, assaulting him, and trying to put a tracker on his car.
Don't get me wrong, the guy is a flawed character, too, planning their wedding even before the relationship starts. But he's not a murderer...until the script tries to make him seem like one. (Gotta keep that Margaret Atwood vibe going.)
Plot contradiction: the dog is super nice to everyone except when the girl goes to the guy's house. Then he's aggressive towards her.
Don't waste your time with this.
Moon Knight (2022)
So, so tedious
Characters that do stupid things are very annoying. There's a lot of that in the first couple of episodes.
It doesn't get any better, though. There's a lot of pointless running around and a mental hospital arc that would be nice if we hadn't seen it before. A lot. It would have been better if they had integrated that with Steven's initial disbelief instead of having him melt down constantly.
The action sequences aren't that good, either. A lot of splicing and set pieces that depend on low lighting and special effects.
Marvel needs to up its game. They're spending a lot of money to put out the equivalent of fan fiction.
No Good Nick (2019)
Sean Astin and Melissa Joan Hart are the bright spots.
Part (season) 1 was okay. Typical fare for those familiar with budget sitcoms. The writing was fairly poor, but overall the show was watchable despite the impossible plot: a tween con artist fools unsuspecting family, friends, schools, etc. with her smile and improbable plot devices.
Part (season) 2, however, was a full deep-dive into an awful, wretched abyss. In an effort to make Nick more palatable (she lies, cheats and steals her way through part 1), the writers chose to plunge her victims into pit of selfish, irresponsible behavior in a "two wrongs make a right" affair. The result is that you feel empathy for no one in the entire show.
This could have been done so much better if Nick had come clean in part one instead and part two consisted of her exposing the criminals who exploited her situation. Instead we get horrible behavior all around (including flashbacks that paint the exploited family as greedy, selfish criminals in their own way) and the flimsy excuse everyone uses to be nasty to each other. Sean Astin and Melissa Joan Hart really should have demanded better writing. They've both been around enough of it to know the difference.
Daddy's Home 2 (2017)
Better than the first one
This sequel has better jokes, more appropriate humor and isn't as obvious as the first movie. The casting is on point and the dad jokes are classics.
Scenes with the kids are a little stilted, but don't detract too much from the overall flow of the film.
It's a classic story about wanting to measure up to your father, but realizing that you have to be your own man in the long run.
Equals (2015)
Clumsy
I liked this better when it was called THX-1138.
This film tries to use dialog to demonstrate the conflict between and within characters but it's a clumsy attempt. In a dystopian world where emotions are a sign of terminal brain disease the reactions of people in society are inconsistent. The initial reaction of the protagonist's peer group is to state that he should be isolated, even shunned. Yet there is no societal mechanism to accomplish this presumably widespread and normal response to someone who exhibits emotions.
Instead, one if his most vocal critic turns out to be a co-sufferer who has managed to hide her condition. It would have been interesting to see her try to sacrifice him in an attempt to stay hidden (people in this society spend their entire lives in social isolation) but instead both people rush headlong into a relationship; something that should be alien and repulsive to them.
So there are no signs of self-loathing or shame that society would have conditioned in to these people and we don't get to see them struggle to overcome those impositions. Nor is there an exploration of these forbidden emotions as an addiction, with the accompanying self-destructive impulses. There are again attempts to signal this with dialog, but again we should *see* the effects. (This is a film, after all!)
There are other, better films that explore the concept of emotions in a society where emotions are a sign of illness or as defects.
The Last Keepers (2013)
A protagonist should be...likeable
The story is bland and the writing is sub-par, but what really tanks this movie is that the main character just isn't likeable.
It may have been different if there was some sort of realization process the character goes through, like with Scrooge, but instead she just continues along, blissfully unaware of how she might be her own worst enemy. Her intended romantic interest comes off as weak due to this. Instead of standing up for himself he just meekly goes along with it as long as she' willing to tolerate his presence.
The plot, which takes far too long to develop, suffers as a result. We don't really care what the main character is (about) to go through because we don't care about her as a person.
Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 (2017)
Soundtrack is the best part
Great soundtrack but story development is not so great in this sequel. Instead of a good plot we see some cheap gags and bad guys who really aren't so bad, or tough.
So people run around killing redshirts and chasing each other and guy who is supposedly the baddest of the bad guys dealing in ultimate betrayal turns out to be...less.
One of the problems is that they people who are supposed to be antagonists (in this and future films) are actually victims of theft. It's kind of hard to root against people who were robbed by the "good guys", even when the victims are "conceited douchebags".
On the whole it's an unsatisfying film. I wish they had spent more time on the plot and more time making the antagonists someone you can actually root against and less time setting up sequels and spin-offs.
The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies (2014)
Not that great...and it doesn't age well
The conclusion of the book is pretty satisfying. The movie, not so much. One of the things I hate about "modern" movies is the way that game scenes are built into the movie. It's obvious which ones will be part of games and it detracts from the film.
The invented characters and scenes do not add to the story in this movie. In fact, they take away from the main plot: absolute wealth corrupts as much as absolute power does.
In the book the battle is well-written. The "armies" are actually more like large companies and the battle takes place in front of the mountain. In the movie, the armies are vast (especially the Orcs, who somehow have tens of thousands of soldiers and move them across vast tracts easily...during daylight no less) and spread out into the ruined town of Dale and the surrounding mountains.
The result is a haphazard mess that Jackson admits he just "winged". He should have spent more time making two well-written movies instead of three rushed ones.
One of the most unfortunate outcomes is that it's highly unlikely that the estate will green light a series of movies based on the Silmarillion. Well, at least not with Jackson.
A Hologram for the King (2016)
So close...
This movie comes close to hitting it out of the park. Alan Clay is a Willy Loman figure. He outsourced production of Schwinn, an American icon, to China and the company went under when the Chinese undercut Schwinn. Clay bitterly describes the result "all the bikes are the same, just different labels for different companies" and the Chinese of course can sell theirs for a fraction of what Schwinn does.
Now he finds himself on a "do or die" mission for his current company. His job is to sell a holographic communications package to the Royal Family in Saudi Arabia.
He has to negotiate a number of obstacles, both real and imaginary, to achieve his goal. There is a literal "monkey on his back" that represents his state in life. Once he gets rid of that the life he imagined comes back...or does it? Karma both gives and takes.
Tighter editing would have made this a much better picture. Perhaps some voice-over dialogue from Clay to emphasize the Willy Loman in him. Flashbacks to the good ol' days when he was the king (of sales) himself.
2 Days in the Valley (1996)
Nice film but too many discontinuities
It's a nice drama film but threads are picked up and dropped without adding to the plot. This is distracting and makes you wonder what was chopped out during editing to "tighten up" the movie. It's not that long, though (104 minutes) and scenes have been obviously reshot, so I think they simply ran out of money.
For example, the "tough cop" played by Daniels receives a lot of screen time at first but then simply gets a letter stating that he has been dropped from active duty and oh, by the way, could he please turn in his gun and badge? Not only are those things done in person, we never see Daniels again. His character really isn't needed for the plot if he can be dropped without affecting it! Then there is the assassin, who gleefully shoots everyone at the drop of a hat but decides to knock out Stoltz's character instead. If Stoltz is needed alive later in the movie then why not have him escape, or shot but just wounded? You know the plot requires him later when Spader's character just bops him on the head.
There are other problems as well, but I'm sure you'll notice them if you decide to watch. You just have to leave it up to sloppy writing/editing or really, really suspend your disbelief. :/
Sausage Party (2016)
A lot of lame things in the movie...
Without a doubt, though, the lamest thing was the orgy scene at the end. Totally unnecessary and it ruined what little empathy we had for the characters in the first place.
This film should have spent a lot more time in the house(s) of the people who bought the food. That would have made more sense and highlighted the incongruity of what the food saw and felt versus what the people did.
Instead we get scenes mashed together so they could trot out a one trick pony or lame joke and then it was on to the next contrived scene.
Hopefully this party will not have a sequel!
Captain America: Civil War (2016)
Disappointing on many levels
I have to say that this movie is disappointing on many levels. They should have spent more time on the backstory and character development instead of special effects. There were also too many characters involved. This was allegedly a movie about Stark and Rodgers but the friction between the two keeps getting lost in (needlessly long) action sequences involving far too many superheroes.
Another thing is that there's no way that Captain America stands up to an Iron Man suit. Yet in this movie it happens over and over again. Is Tony losing it? Are his suits defective? Is Captain America suddenly super-super human? No, it's just written that way with no reasons whatsoever.
It's also unfortunate that they've written Pepper Potts out of the story line(s). She and Tony had great chemistry and it added another dimension to Tony's character.
This movie would have been a lot better if Rodgers had died in the end. Apparently we'll have to deal with at least two more movies with his asshattery involved. :/
Ex Machina (2014)
It was okay...then it ended
The movie was a bit plodding and it was obviously designed to keep you guessing about the ultimate plot and who was "a good person" and who wasn't.
The end, though...just plain stupid. Ava needs Caleb to negotiate the outside world for at least a little while. Given the multitude of choices there isn't a plausible path that gets her to the helicopter, nor is there a reason why she would kill him.
We are left to contemplate whether Ava is "a good person" (obviously not if she kills so easily) or whether she regards human life as foreshadowed earlier in the movie: upright apes scrounging about in the dust (again, not a nice person if she lacks empathy).
So Nathan's creation passed the Turing test (the movie's version) but failed the humanity test.
Legacy of Ancient Civilizations (2001)
Bad video and audio, mediocre content
The actual content of these videos isn't that bad for short overviews. The video is of below average quality and the audio is horrible. I suspect this is a poorly dubbed and transferred video from an Italian original program series.
That's all there is to say about this video but IMDb, in their infinite wisdom, says I have to keep writing. So I guess I will just have to keep going until there are enough words to satisfy the drones at IMDb. Are we there yet?
Apparently not.
How about now?
The Spitfire Grill (1996)
Over-hyped
This film was allegedly a critical success but in reality it's a plodding, overwrought film that never really gets going.
The characters are shallow and the alleged protagonist is a "Mary Sue". While I was led to believe that the film would be a wonderful account of people and complexities of relationships all I saw was bad writing and worse acting.
While the written version and Biblical allegories of forgiveness and healing may work, this theatrical version misses the mark. I suppose if you have a pariah complex you can relate to this movie but for everyone else it's a waste of time.
Sicko (2007)
Another propaganda tract from the Minister of Disinformation
Widely panned and bombing at the box office, this film is nothing more than Moore's latest attempt to bash capitalism (which has made him "filthy rich") and portray a socialist dictatorship as a paradise because they purportedly have "good" health care.
Question Michael will never answer: why didn't you take a camera into the streets of Cuba and interview real people?
Why did you allow yourself to be a pawn of a ruthless dictator?
Cuba imprisons AIDS patients.
Is that the model Moore wants us to follow?
Michael? Are you there? Micheal?
Bridge to Terabithia (2007)
Horrible film; deceptive marketing
This is not a film for kids. Unless of course they are emo teens obsessed with death.
Deceptively marketed as a fantasy adventure this is nothing more than a plodding snuff film punctuated by scenes of real enjoyment--which only make the film all the worse because you realize what it could have been.
Plot threads are taken up and then dropped without explanation. We see a bully get her comeuppance and then apparently take a turn for the better only to disappear from the film except as the head of a troll in brief fantasy scenes. We see one-dimensional teachers who could have added so much more depth to the movie but who are instead wasted as mere plot devices allegedly representing temptation and remorse.
You get the sense that the alleged "evil" in the fantasy world is the boy's father. Perhaps the author had issues with her father but beyond being emotionally distant there is no evil in the boy's father. We'll never know what the author was thinking because this plot thread is simply dropped as well.
My daughter was disappointed and I was ready to ask for my money back.
Horrible, just horrible.
Saw (2004)
Not so surprising end; is human nature that bad?
Two problems with this movie.
First, I guessed the eventual "surprise twist" at the end. I thought it was fairly obvious, especially after seeing movies like "Seven".
Knowing what was coming only enhanced my other objection, which is to believe that everyone involved chose the "evil" path offered to them instead of the "good" (but self-sacrificing) path.
I can see the girl doing so, as she was both panicked and tricked, but everyone else had a lot of time to think about what they were doing.
It's okay as a blood and guts movie, but it doesn't stand up as a first-rate suspense/thriller.