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An error has ocurred. Please try againMany Lovecraft stories were left off of this list because: 1. They didn't rate high enough on my personal system. 2. IMDB doesn't have an entry for them (some good ones!).
Reviews
Brian Cox: Seven Days on Mars (2022)
Would be great if it weren't for Cox.
Speaking as a physicist, Cox is the bottom of the barrel when it comes to physics documentaries. I remember seeing him in a documentary where it literally showed his ridiculous reactions more than the actual science it was supposed to be showing. Cox definitely tries very hard to be a public darling, but it just doesn't work - at least not for people who are interested in the science and not his newest hairdo.
He wants to be the next Carl Sagan, but he just isn't. I keep trying these docs, but it just doesn't ever comes off well. I am so confused what the BBC sees in him. I guess they are really trying to reach a younger audience. But Cox isn't the answer. Physicists actually make fun of these docs. It's a shame, because the public NEEDS docs like this.
Shortwave (2016)
Very good concept. Very bad execution.
I gave this two stars b/c I really like the concept. And in general, I love slow burning sci-fi as long as the payoff is worth it.
First problem is the lead actress. Holy cow. I haven't seen acting this stiff in a long long time. Maybe if the script was on Serbian, she might have seemed more at ease with it? But unfortunately I doubt it
Second problem is the pretention with Which the emotional aspects of the film are portrayed. I hate saying this b/c art is subjective and it's so hard to release anything for fear of being ridiculed. But after I watched the film I looked up the director and.....well. All you have to do is look at his profile and the absolutely ridiculous selfies correlate with this film and I don't feel as guilty calling it pretentious. It's a shame. Good concept. I wanted to like it.
Housewife (2017)
From a Huge lovecraft fan
I really wanted to like this. I collect Lovecraft inspired artwork (including films), and this one seemed like it had a ton of potential! I loved the idea, plus i enjoyed the directors film Baskin quite a bit.
However, right from the beginning i realized that the director/writer must be very uncomfortable with English dialogue. Baskin was Not English and the dialogue seemed much more natural and well written. Housewife is in English and ( unfortunately) the dialogue comes off incredibly silly and unnatural. At times it wasn't reminiscent of The Room (often touted as the worst dialogue of all time). It was Hard to tell if the fault lied with the actors inability to act in English comfortably or the terrible scripts they had to work with, but i fear It was a combination of both.
I loved the idea (especially of the final scene), but the corny clunky way to get there, uneven plot structure, terrible acting, ridiculous dialogue, nonsensical sex scenes, and the language bastardizing ruined it.
Guillermo del Toro's Cabinet of Curiosities: Dreams in the Witch House (2022)
I am not sure how it could have been worse
I love Lovecraft. And I love this series. However this episode should have been vetted and left on the cutting room floor.
This is nothing like Lovecrafts Dreams In The Witch House. So many ridiculous characters were added just to shoehorn them in. They made no sense considering the time and location of the story. I was really excited for this episode b/c I love both the series and Lovecraft. But unfortunately it was by far the worst so far. I hope GDT doesn't invite this director back for another stinker.
In addition to the terrible distortion of the story and dumb dialogue and reasoning throughout, another pet peeve of mine is constantly showing actors play instruments who have no idea how to play them. There are clever ways to hide the fact that the actor isn't really playing. What you NEVER should do is focus the camera right on their hands so that just in case you weren't paying attention, now you are forced to realize the music has nothing to do with this actor banging their hands randomly on the instrument. Lol.
The Aeronauts (2019)
Would have been good if they had not disrespected the actual hero.
For some reason they thought it would be a good idea to alter history and turn the actual aeronaut Henry Coxwell into a fictional woman character named Amelia Wren. Seems incredibly disrespectful to Henry's legacy to completely disregard him and turn him into a fake woman character just to fit a current social agenda. I guess this is what we have to look forward to from historical movies from now on....
Prank Encounters (2019)
Missed the mark completely
So they do a prank show. Fine. The stories are pretty badly written. Still....whatever that happens in several hidden camera shows. But why have the incredibly "famous child director". They're trying to bank on him being in Stranger Things to sell this but it had the opposite effect. The terrible editing of the ridiculously "child " spliced in is laughably bad.
Chicago Rot (2016)
Wow. I am amazed by the amount of indie movies with fake reviews these days.
Seriously folks. How more obvious can some of these fake reviewers be? If you click on the 3 main culprits (all have similar IMDb usernames) who wrote SUPER positive reviews, you will see that each of them have all recently joined IMDb and they all HAVE ONLY EACH REVIEWED ONE MOVIE. This one. Right. Nice try.
So obviously the rating here is way over-inflated through fake ratings of people who are involved with this terrible film in one way or another. The film is trash. I had an extremely hard time trying to sit through the horrible acting, the retarded dialogue, and the ridiculous attempt to be over-the-top gory. I love good indie films of any genre, but I don't have much tolerance for the dishonorable and dishonest methods of boosting reviews and ratings.
Movies that try too hard to be weird without any substance don't win. Should I even mention the absolutely terrible soundtrack that doesn't fit the pacing of the movie? Or the ridiculously bad music video that starts the movie and seems to interject itself in the middle with a random girl playing piano in the back of a truck? No, no I'll let you torture yourself with this tripe.