ashenyoni Reviews

A Child Is Missing (1995 TV Movie)

gut-wrenching from beginning to end

[9/10 · 3 April 2007]

This movie kept me on the edge of my La-Z-Boy. No joke. Not only does the fine cast of characters consistently deliver poignant performances, the writing and costuming are the best that I've ever seen in a made-for-television film. What sets this movie apart from other Lifetime movies is the incredible subtext:that of loneliness and the quest for fullness. (As an interesting aside, the first recorded use of lonely occurs in Wm Shakespeare's COriolanus.) Generally speaking, as part of an existential crisis,loneliness is comprised of feelings of emptiness and isolation.These feelings pervade a person's psyche and cause him to think that he is suffering from an interpersonal conflict, and shuns all human contact. The man in the woods, in this film, suffers from existential loneliness. Yet he overcomes it to help a young boy, and his problems dissolve at the end of this fine film. Truly, the issue of existential loneliness, its severity, and the ultimate resolution to such a serious problem, embedded within this film will make it a classic for years to come.

Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman: The Heart Within (2001 TV Movie)

Dr. Quinn, you are truly an inspiration to all women

[8/10 · 3 April 2007]

I dare say that this film, based upon the television series, truly touched my life. As a woman, in the 1800s, Dr Quinn went to medical school, moved to the frontier, took in three children, started her own practice, and married one hot, hot man, SUlly. SHe is truly an inspiration to all women who want to enter the professional world, for she conquers all odds and stays true to herself. She doesn't let any men push her around, and she stands up for what she believes in. In this film, her true character comes through, and I am seriously glad I watched it. The plot, the casting, the cinematography, and the acting are off the hook! Michaela Quinn is my idol.

The Substitute 3: Winner Takes All (1999 TV Movie)

Suspenseful with a capital S

[7/10 · 17 May 2005]

To attach the nomenclature, "suspensful," to this film would be putting it mildly. This film is a riveting piece of cinema, to say the least. Any movie that features a professional mercenary in a leading role is definitely quality. After all, the action that issues from a mercenary can in no way be paltry. ANd, when mercenaries meet football jocks, things ALWAYS get interesting, especially when drugs are involved. The way Karl spells his name indicates that he is a force to be reckoned with. The K suggests that Karl may be German, and everyone knows that Germans are fighters. Stalwart Karl fights for what he believes in and is a true hero. This film is gripping from beginning to end, and I would recommend it to everyone

The Wonderful World of Disney: Model Behavior (2000) Season 3, Episode 9

surprisingly good

[8/10 · 17 May 2005]

As I settled on the sofa to watch this film, I had no idea what to expect. I turned off the lights and the credits began to roll. Man, was I in for a shock. This movie was DYNAMIC. Not only was the plot solid, but the characters were deep and enthralling. This film captivated me both mentally and physically. Man, it was good. I have been a Kathie lee Gifford fan since I was in diapers, and she has never ceased to amaze me. Her performance in Model Behavior surpassed her small, yet vital, role in Dudley Doright, ten fold. Kathie Lee outshone the other performers in this film like the sun outshines the moon. And since the moon doesn't shine naturally, there is just no comparison. This film exemplifies Kathie Lee Gifford's talent as an actress of the highest caliber. She is a star among stars.

Heart of a Stranger (2002 TV Movie)

not so extra-ordinary

[5/10 · 27 March 2005]

Jane Seymour takes on an interesting role in this film. However, I'm not so sure that the story was so odd, or even feasible for that matter. Jane Seymour plays a woman who gets a heart transplant. After the transplant, she starts behaving like a twenty year old woman, and in doing so drives a wedge between her daughter and herself. She attributes this outlandish behavior to her new heart, and goes on a painstaking search to find out who the donor is. However, her behavior coincides with a typical middle aged woman who refuses to get old, has a midlife crisis, and acts like a young woman. So I think the plot was somewhat stretched. Besides that it was a watchable movie.

FernGully: The Last Rainforest (1992)

Interesting Concept

[6/10 · 13 March 2005]

Ferngully boasts a fairly notable cast and an interesting premise. The film is predictable and the plot is somewhat terse, but the film is not horrid. (Robin Williams as Batty was the most quotable person in the second grade.) The film invokes fond memories of childhood, yet, looking back, it seems rather disturbing. One scene in particular strikes me as vaguely oedipal. Hexxis, a cloud of filth, rises from the smoke stacks of the factory and as he sucks on the smoke stack he grows exponentially and says somewhat sexually, "Mommy's milk." He clearly derives pleasure from his "mother," but he is past the stage where breast feeding is natural. The overt representation of satiation from one's mother, strikes me as shocking. In fact, it is downright unpleasant. Other than that disturbing image, the film is acceptable, and definitely pleasurable, for young children, bothersome for teenagers, and mildly annoying for adults.

The Pebble and the Penguin (1995)

utterly fantastic

[9/10 · 12 March 2005]

The Pebble and the Penguin is a fine example of animated film at its best. Hubie, the endearing penguin, illustrates perseverance in its finest form, and his tenacity is something to be admired. This timeless story is delightful to audiences of all ages. In today's world, where divorce and unrequited love run rampant, this simple story inspires and reminds everyone that true love is possible. In order to find the perfect pebble for Marina, Hubie searches the world. The emotional turmoil that Hubie subjects himself to on his quest is akin to the interior tumult any human being feels. This film captures the essence of human love in a captivating and moving way. The musical talent of Barry Manilow only adds to the quality of this film. I think that this animal story offers incite to one of the most pivotal moments of human life: engagement. Everyone should watch this classic tale.

King of Texas (2002 TV Movie)

watch it for a laugh

[3/10 · 12 March 2005]

Although the concept is original, King of Texas is incredibly disappointing. It does remain fairly faithful to King Lear, however. (Naturally, in order to make a cohesive hour and a half film, specific characters and plot elements were discarded.) Patrick Stewart, best known for his portrayal of Captain Picard, delivers an unreal, ludicrous, performance. Whoever thought it would be clever to cast an Englishman as a hard core Texan was gravely mistaken.That said, the film was not completely terrible. In fact, certain parts were outright hilarious. The film is utterly overacted. The repeated comments about the Alamo and San Jacinto are completely unnecessary, ridiculous, and tasteless, and the film is completely outlandish. But, what makes the film awful makes it watchable. The utter absurdity of this film keeps the viewer in stitches.