latinotoons Reviews

Thirteen Lives (2022)

Remember when a Billionaire tried to Hijack and take Credit for this rescue?

[9/10 · 9 January 2023]

This film is a magnificently executed adaptation of a real-world rescue which attracted international attention. It is a testament to humility, perseverance and cooperation.

I am an open water diver, and find cave diving terrifying. I cannot begin to wrap my head around the complexity of a cave rescue. The bravery of all those involved in saving these Thai children is laudable and faithfully represented by Ron Howard. Darkness, strong currents, falling rocks, tight cave entrances and an almost 3k of passages underwater presented a daunting challenge to the international team of volunteers who risked their own lives to rescue the stranded children. Viggo Mortensen and Colin Farrell lend their undeniable talent to this understated gem. The director also makes a conscious effort to respectfully portray the vitality of the Thai people's faith, the sacrifices made by their farmers, and the resolve shown by youths who faced death as a team.

With time running out for those trapped, it is important to remember that "real-life's tony stark" and the world's wealthiest man sought to capitalize on the relief effort, sending a Submarine which he reminded the world was developed by engineers at SpaceX. Upon being rejected, King Twit launched an unhinged attack on one of the divers who helped coordinate the rescue. I hope one day he will stoop to watching this movie.

Kaleidoscope (2023)

If Bad One Liners are your thing

[3/10 · 2 January 2023]

Imagine if you were up late the first of the year and stumbled across this new show. Naively trusting of the handful of talent they'd sourced, you dedicate three quarters of an hour of your life to Kaleidoscope, starting on yellow, because hey, thats what autostart is for anyway. Dull voice overs and vignettes abound, a rehash of classic tropes from caper flicks, each one more tiring and poorly delivered than the last. Unlikeable and unexplicably motivated characters, a slew of bad accents, jarring pacing, irregular sound mixing... you get the picture. The only thing worth watching in this show seems like Rufus Sewell's performance. Rayuela it aint.

Treason (2022)

If the Care Bears ran M16

[3/10 · 28 December 2022]

Just when you think trouble's gonna pounce, who's gonna be there when it really counts? Grumpy Bear had too much tea and needs a nap! Fortunately, Tenderheart bear is there to run M16. But wowza, its a big job! Share Bears have him in their sights and are threatening to spill all! With the help of Kompromat Bear, Tenderheart does his bumbling best, wanders around London, and finally summons the courage in his heart to try and defeat the nefarious Grumpy Bear, just risen from his nap, who, albeit a slightly better spy, does not have Baby Hugs, Wish and True Heart Bear as well as all the other care bears rooting for him. A care-filled journey of five breath-taking episodes where we learn to play the care game, care for each other and country, even if Best Friend bears can be a douche. The moral: caring is what counts?

The Green Knight (2021)

OPEN your MIND

[10/10 · 30 July 2021]

And... the heart will follow. Film as ensorcelment, modern scorcery for the screen. Best Lighting, Best Costume, Best Actor, Best Director.

... .. . > *

Old (2021)

11 STARS

[9/10 · 30 July 2021]

Could trim the final 11 minutes. Otherwise a masterclass in color, writing and style. #BestOscar for Script.

Sorry Gael, best actor goes to Gree Knight.

Sweet Tooth (2021– )

Somewhere, in a parallel universe, there is a Sweet tooth where Clint Eastwood plays Bigman.

[8/10 · 8 June 2021]

This show is based on a brilliant comic by Jeff Lemire. Read the comic. Really. Its captivating, brilliant, and brutal. If you have kids, watch the show. Its a well-shot, sunny version of the comic, noticeably toned down, inclusive, and heartwarming in its best moments. The show borrows from the original story, and after one episode, largely goes off the reservation. I understand why they did it, and I applaud the actors for their talent, but I can't shake off the feeling that somewhere in a parallel universe, there is a NC-17 Sweet Tooth, directed by and starring Clint Eastwood. Oh well.

Arde Madrid (2018)

Somewhat of a Red Herring

[7/10 · 8 June 2021]

The show is ostensibly about Franco's Spain, and the beautiful and somewhat debauched Ava Gardner. The year is 1955, and the government suspects the Hollywood femme fatale of conspiring with the communists, so they decide to infiltrate her inner circle by way of a fabricated couple who will assume the role of cleaning woman and chauffeur respectively. The camera work is beautiful, the acting is on point, and the flamenco music is splendid. It is a pity that the script ultimately shies away from digging deeper into a real criticism of fascist Spain. An honorable mention goes to the long-suffering argentine General Perón, who makes for a pleasing riposte to Ava's antics.

Nobody (I) (2021)

One of the most stylish action directors today.

[7/10 · 5 May 2021]

The illegitimate child of Tarantino and David LaChapelle, Ilya Naishuller is a FPS punk director who seems to like to keep scripts simple enough so that they can be written on a vodka napkin. NOBODY breathes life into the aging gewahltporn shooter genre. Where Bruce Willis, Denzel Washington, and others have failed, Bob Odenkirk unexpectedly succeeds, delivering a self-deprecating performance which takes him leagues from Better Call Saul and makes you wonder if he is action hero franchise material. Like all of Illya's films, the payout is a collection of beautiful vignettes, interspersed throughout, that stick with you long after the credits and add to his continuing opus of violence. Good, though perhaps not great, NOBODY still fails to escape the shadow of Naishuller's brilliant music video work (See Leningrad - Voyage). Here's hoping he will one day team up with Neil Blomkamp, with whom he seems to share an aesthetic language.

7.5/10.

New Gods: Nezha Reborn (2021)

Stunning animation

[8/10 · 13 April 2021]

Wonderful animation and action sequences are threaded together by a compelling myth retold in this chinese cyberpunk story. I wish the characters didn't remind me of asian barbies, but you get over it.

Dogwashers (2020)

Dark humor, killer soundtrack

[8/10 · 15 March 2021]

Lavaperros is a slice of life film of small town thugs in Colombia's Cauca region. Chocked to the brim with dark humor, and a varied cast of characters, I found it a refreshing change from overly self-conscious American crime dramas. Nihilism at its best. KILLER SOUND TRACK.

Space Force (2020–2022)

Waiting for a Russian lampoon

[3/10 · 30 May 2020]

I dare the Russians to make something funnier than this. Would not be hard... ;(

I'm No Longer Here (2019)

Stunning photography captures captivating dancing of Cholombianos

[8/10 · 28 May 2020]

Stunning photography: a deft back and forth between Northern Mexico's harsh cement perifery and the neon of New York paints the no-nonsense story of an immigrant dancer from Monterrey's vibrant Kolombia subculture.

The King (I) (2019)

Emo King

[6/10 · 5 November 2019]

Brooding, slow-moving historical fiction, where gravelly voices and woeful string instrumentation do little to disguise a simple story of a boy with daddy issues.

The Laundromat (I) (2019)

Missed a golden opportunity with this topic.

[5/10 · 24 October 2019]

Antonio Banderas moonlights in this movie much like Mossack Fonseca served so many shell companies. With the "starts" only there in name, this movie was shot like a TV commercial: the end result lacks substance where sub-par acting abounds.

Warrior (2019–2023)

Bruce Lee could have used some good writing

[6/10 · 6 October 2019]

Great set design and occasionally decent acting can't save this series from it's terrible writing.

Avatar (2009)

Blue Pocahontas Anyone?

[5/10 · 13 August 2019]

Sadly, the director missed a 400 million dollar chance to make a worthwhile film about the indigenous peoples of the United States, preferring instead to craft a great white savior narrative set in a utopic "alien" world.

Imagine: a group of natives who live in harmony with their environment, suddenly driven from their lands by the greedy mineral hungry intentions of foreign invaders backed by an unnamed corporation with a profit motive. Sound familiar?

It is sad to see that the supposed "vanguard" of Sci-Fi film-making is actually a weakly retooled reboot of the history of US westward expansion, and the subsequent massacre of indigenous peoples for land and resources. Some scenes, such as horses aflame are particularly reminiscent of stories from the book Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee. Others borrow from diverse re-tellings of the Pocahontas myth, where instead of being kidnapped and raped, a local princess falls for a young military invader, sharing with him her culture and bed.

But then, James Cameron takes the narrative ONE STEP further...

SPOILER ALERT: The great white guilt of this great white director is assuaged somewhat by turning the narrative on its head, for unlike the genocide perpetrated against the Native Americans, this time the locals win, aided by mother nature herself... Oscars please.

IN CONCLUSION: Unimaginative and CG-heavy, cringe-worthy dialogue betrays Cameron's own naive view of the way that an outsider would go about "discovering" local customs, and then assume his place in the local myth by going on to lead the people.

Polar (I) (2019)

Comics will save Action Cinema

[9/10 · 28 January 2019]

The strong visual narrative crafted in the original comics shines through in this film adaptation. Mads dead on performance as an aging hitman makes Bruce Willis look positively verbose.

Deftly done drone filming and innovative digital filters make for breathtaking landscapes, with action-packed scenes crammed with eye-candy and tributes to Korean and other action classics.

Phillip Seymour Hoffman, if he were still with us, would have made this a 10 star film as the lead villain.

War Machine (2017)

If Brad Pitt's charisma could win the war...

[8/10 · 14 July 2018]

A wonderfully scripted film: engaging, entertaining deadpan, and not the least bit disrespectful, it exhibits the inherent contradictions in war and empire-building--wait, we don't call it that anymore...

Brad Pitt is a charismatic powerhouse in his role as the Glennimal.

Asura (2016)

Masterfully shot Dog-Eat-Dog

[9/10 · 18 October 2017]

Annam Korea is the backdrop for this noir-esque masterfully shot crime thriller. Caught in a catch 22 of violence and deception, abuse begets abuse in the dog-eat-dog world of Asura: The City of Madness, where corruption is the day to day of cops and politicians.

Asian cinema is on a whole other level in terms of artful violence.

Daredevil (2015–2018)

Daredevil is almost great... for an imitation game

[6/10 · 19 March 2016]

Not a bad show, for trying to be something it's not.

In an age where the internet is our go-to-source for information, it would seem almost redundant to make an issue of startling similarities, to not cite outright plagiarism by TV & Film, and yet... Daredevil, while having obvious potential, falls too often into the trap of "common places", resulting in a watered-down imitation game of something greater, which the show simply is not.

But who to steal from, and why? Hannibal with Mads Mikkelsen was a runaway hit, bringing some much needed sophistication to American television. Daredevil, takes its cue from the get-go, and mimics the introduction itself, in a blood-splattered tribute to CG wizardry.

But this doesn't stop there. Risen from the slums to better things, Fisk is unconvincingly portrayed as parading his "worldliness" while "elegantly" making an omelet as classical music plays in his penthouse overlooking the city. Both the scene and the character are weaker takes on the gourmand lifestyle that is their source material. It is a small tragedy that Fisk, possibly the most compelling and in depth character in Daredevil Season 1 is in reality a cheap knock-off of Madds Mikkelsen's Hannibal Lecter.

But it doesn't stop there...

Season 1 Episode 11 is a perfect example of this, showcasing a lengthy monologue by Fisk's right hand man, Wesley, who is tired of the city and it's people... and almost exactly mimics Morpheus's interrogation scene in the Matrix, by Agent Smith, thematically ("I am tired of this city and its people") and even linguistically (with the actor slurring his words balefully).

Still not convinced?

Almost immediately, Wesley follows this borrowed inspiration by paraphrasing dialogue which also appears in Episode 9 of MR. ROBOT Season 1, where Terry Colby offers Angela a job at E Corp, by the same mega-corporation that is responsible for the tragedies that have befallen her, in unflinchingly cold logic... sound familiar?

Maybe Hollywood lacks writers, or maybe some people are just getting sloppy when cribbing from other scripts...

And maybe Daredevil isn't all that it's cracked up to be...

Sicario (2015)

Surprising? Only if you know nothing about the Drug War

[6/10 · 7 January 2016]

Instead of the gritty realistic film experience it pretends to be, SICARIO is a well shot, wholly unimaginative and thoroughly "Gringo" portrayal of the Drug War in which the US is a major player.

If realism were the goal, consulting journalistic sources like Mexico's PROCESO magazine or the now extinct BLOG DEL NARCO might have generated a more realistic script. Instead of the usual Hollywood fantasy of the 80s and 90s, with overt messages of invading a country in order to spark regime change, the film tries to subtly garner support for illegal black ops in Mexico as a necessary result of "growing up" as the unfortunate neighbor (and not the author) of the drug war. This is further reinforced by Blunt 's character, who reminds Del Toro of his daughter, who died an innocent. Optimistic, procedural Ms. Blunt survives but remains innocent and weepy throughout, the liberal attitude she represents clearly derided for able to cut it in the battle against the "barbaric cartels".

The film's violence, peppered throughout, is the result of competing cartels, and "surgical" US intervention. Gone are the golden years of yore when the CIA coordinated trafficking, money laundering, and guns smuggling from the US to Colombia, Colombia to Mexico, and Mexico to the US in one smooth operation. (If this is news to you, you might want to look into the Kerry Report , published in 1994). Monopolizing the business with support from the US military is the only solution the film proposes, which is a) not a solution; and b) nothing new. Wouldn't a Mexican Noriega be nice…

Finally, with sparse dialogue— in poorly spoken Spanish no less— it seems that in spite of budget, actual Mexican actors and consultants were in short supply.

Anyone actually looking to understand the narco issue should consider watching EL INFIERNO (2010).