p_sandalz Reviews

Crash (1996)

Why didn't I have my teeth extracted instead

[1/10 · 28 July 2006]

This film is diabolical. My original review was declined for profanity, so this one is a bit toothless so as to make it through the filtering process. I don't get it: if you're the type of person to be shocked by a bit of foul language then why would you be considering watching a film where the idea of sticking your penis in a wound is broached? Honestly - save yourself a couple of hours of your life and go for something better: if somebody offers you a viewing of this flick, or a kick in the balls, take the hours of gasping winded feeling I beg of thee.

I have to questions why is there a demographic for girls under the age of 18 for this film? "girls under the age of 18 thought this film deserved...5.1" Poor dears - they should be reported to their parents, or better still to councillors who will try to undo the damage done by being exposed to such awful trash as this. When I saw it at a cinema in Norwich about a third of the theatre-goers (including myself) left prematurely. Not because it was distasteful, although certainly it is a very dirty little film, but because it was laughable, and worst of all - really very boring.

I don't know what the people giving this film marks like 7,8,9 & 10 were watching! All I can imagine is that they were looking at their own reflection on the surface of the TV and liked what they saw. Aah, vanity.

So on the whole - not bad, but could be better.

Two Idiots in Hollywood (1988)

Comedy gold - but clearly not to everybody's tastes.

[9/10 · 28 July 2005]

I couldn't disagree much stronger with the sentiment of old zogmorph's review of this movie. I guess it's one of those films that you either love or truly hate.

It's not the most sophisticated of premises, I'll give you that much: a chief guiding principle of the film, for example, is that the protagonists, and even inanimate objects, must send themselves up at almost every opportunity. How many scenes are interrupted by problems with the set, passers by getting in the way, and loud police sirens drowning out the diction? But it really works for me. Similarly, a lot of the humour is pretty childish: there's a character called Loupenis Jones! But it's all good good good as far as I'm concerned. I ask you: Loupenis, hahahaha.

But. You don't understand. When the moon is full...

If you don't know what comes next you need to see the hit film TWO IDIOTS IN Hollywood.

Bakersfield P.D. (1993– )

Great show - hilarious. Possibly aired to wrong audience?

[9/10 · 28 July 2005]

I liked this show a lot - we got the first and only, it would appear, series in the UK on channel 4. The characterisation was right on the money - a bit like the Simpsons in that all the different facets of small town populace were represented.

There was no laughter track - I hadn't seen this on an American TV comedy at the time except for on Larry Sanders and it really worked well here, heightening the suggestion that these wacky cops were really like that, and not just hamming it up for the cameras.

All in all, a quirky little number that tickled me just right: I can't help but think that maybe it missed it's mark with certain audiences. I think it would have been a cult hit in the UK had it been shown at an acceptable hour.

I'll round this off with my standard comment: Where the hell can I get hold of this to watch it again? Any ideas?

Danger Theatre (1993)

Hilarious show - probably not to everybody's tastes.

[8/10 · 28 July 2005]

This show was not on for long - only a handful of episodes before being pulled; but we did get it in the UK, on BBC2, out of hours. It was a collection of 2 or 3 short themed comedy sketches crammed into twenty-five minutes.

Tropical Punch saw Adam West and co. as Hawaiin - or possibly Floridian, I can't remember - detectives, hot on the trail of a variety of small time crooks. For West, at least, it was kind of a reprise of his old Batman character but as a modern day detective. This and other skits were forgettable, but...

The Searcher, starring Diedrich Bader was pure slapstick gold. Bader played a leather clad biker-investigator with a heart of gold - a kind of one man A-team without all the guns etc. He was incredibly accident prone; the writers seemingly intent on having him really injured in any unlikely and painful way whenever possible; but like cartoon violence he was always OK and so it was dead funny.

Now, if only there was somewhere I could get these episodes to watch again - any suggestions anybody?