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The Holdovers (2023)
Loved loved loved this movie!
Welp, award season is here and along with it the slew of "critically acclaimed" movies we're all supposed to love. Problem is, so many of them are stinkers. I will never understand how people just fall in line with all the sheep raving about something and then rave themselves, not because it is really good, but because they are convinced by other people that it is really good.
This is NOT one of those movies! Skip the pseudo-intellectual claptrap about how this guy writes it, this gal directs it, this one shoots it, this other one edits it, these ones act it, the hidden symbolism or the lessons we are supposed to take way. Skip it! Forget it! How about some just plain entertainment?
That's what this movie is. An immensely entertaining, heartwarming story well told and deeply satisfying. Isn't that enough? If that IS enough for you, watch this movie!
Killers of the Flower Moon (2023)
Why do I do this to myself?
Every award season, it's the same scenario: All these titles released, people go bonkers and the ratings are up in the stratosphere. People write all these glowing reviews with all kinds of intelli-speak and artsy interpretation and whatnot, and I just feel like a slug sitting on the couch wondering what all the fuss is about.
But I watch them all, or at least as many as I can, maybe because mostly I like the awards shows and I want to know what's behind the nominations. But there are always stinkers that nearly put me to sleep, and this is one one of them. Why in the world was it necessary to run this thing up to three and a half hours? Is it just because Scorcese is full of himself? And maybe I'm just old, but why is it so hard to make out the dialogue? Anyway, if you like soporific movies, this one's for you. I can scarcely believe I was able to stay awake for the whole thing.
The Power of the Dog (2021)
What is WRONG with people?
I don't understand critics fawning over this movie - or others of its ilk, for that matter. By ilk I mean somnambulistic. That's it in a word. Somnambulistic. A slow-paced, boring snooze fest that wasted two hours and gave nothing in return. A great performance by Benedict Cumberbatch, for sure but. . . . if you're having trouble sleeping, put this on.
Phantom Thread (2017)
Same Thing, New Year
Arrogant designer to the aristocracy speaks in hushed tones and impossibly naive young girl "falls in love" with him for no apparently good reason.
I've never been a big fan of Daniel Day-Lewis and in fact find most of his movies dreadful, but I try. . . I try. In my opinion though, this just adds to the pantheon of dreadful work he has turned in over the years. I don't understand how or why people think he is as great as they claim.
Every year in awards season there is at least one, and usually more, film that some critics somewhere rave about and unknowing sheep get on the bandwagon and inflate their own egos by pretending to be intelligent movie watchers and continue the raving to the point where the film is grossly overrated. This is yet another example of that.
If you want to go to sleep, just take an Ambien!
The Lobster (2015)
A Comedy?
I don't know how this could be classified as a comedy, even a black comedy. In any comedy, I would expect at least to smile, not scowl through the whole thing.
If this is supposed to be about. . . conformity, resistance to authority, love even . . . I can think of more appealing ways to deal with those subjects.
"Captures the nature of love in the 21st century." Seriously? If that's what love is, don't let it anywhere near me!
Like Youth, this is just another case of letting myself be influenced by critics raving about a movie, and then suffering through the entire thing waiting for something redeeming to happen, if only in my own mind, only to be disappointed in the end. In this case, sorely disappointed.
Why I occasionally waste two hours at a time on drivel like this escapes me.
Code of Honor (2016)
Cliché Fest
I'll give this a 3 because generally I like Steven Seagal, but it could easily have qualified for a 1. Slow moving and dull, without very good acting - in fact some of it downright bad - without a compelling story line, and without any particularly sympathetic characters. I mean, even the doe-eyed-cute mother, who should be sympathetic, is little more than a caricature. And not enough of the beautifully choreographed martial arts fight scenes that Seagal built his reputation on. These are why I watch Steven Seagal movies, and they were sadly lacking.
And the clichés. Oh my god. If you like clichés, you need not watch any other movie. Ever. Just watch this one over and over because it has every bad cliché that has ever been in any movie. Any movie. Ever. So bad that I was saying lines out loud before the "actors" said them! There went an hour and three quarters of predictability that I will never get back.
Youth (2015)
Two Hours Wasted
Well that is two hours of my life I won't get back.
I understand that there is such a thing as an "artful" film, and don't get me wrong, there are many I enjoy. But this is not one of them. This is one that is packed with star power to draw you in, but doesn't deliver on its promise.
Although he is not well known, I recognized the face of Paul Dano and was excited to see him in it - that it might be a meaty role for him. I suppose his, and indeed, most, of the roles were well acted, but it's like putting lipstick on a pig - it's still a pig.
Dull, slow moving, contrived, stultifying. If you're forced to see it, have a double espresso beforehand - otherwise, it will be like taking an Ambien.