EatThatPie Reviews

Robot and Monster (2012–2015)

Peak Fiction

[7/10 · 6 August 2023]

Disney, Hillenburg, Tartakovsky, Hirsch. They all weep that they will never reach the unadulterated pure perfection that is Robot and Monster. I personally find the concept of a purple blob with horns mistaking dynamite for bacon, eating it, and then promptly exploding and taking his workplace with him to be the most comical thing that can be possibly conceived. Its intriguing that they all live in this ethnostate made up of only monsters and robots and how their police force has the illuminati on their badges, I was looking forward to the big twist finale where the titular characters who are both named after their respective races slowly uncover the cult thats running their industrialized, mundane town that forces everyone to do useless tasks such as mass producing blinking lights, and they eventually leave and climb over a wall or something and find the rest of the world but I guess this show's creators who's names are not m night shyamalan thought It would be more entertaining to have Ogo, the show's local schizoid/gigachad get brutally murdered by venomous sharks multiple times.

Marf is by far the best character with the most interesting arc, I wish they could finish the show before he eventually became the main villain, as it was teased he wanted to usurp his owners and would quite possibly become the catalyst for the aforementioned cult reveal and subsequent escape. I for whatever reason thought this small show was the best thing ever when I was like 9 and even now some of these jokes are too highbrow for the smooth brains but it's certainly an odd little show that lasted for a few years then vanished, where it got no merchandise and has a dvd copy that's more or less lost media with copies going on sale for over 100 dollars on ebay once in a blue moon. It was far better than the other random garbage Nicktoons that were pumped out at the time, but still just had nothing really happening for the entire show, I like watching Robot make a thermonuclear bomb to help them eat bacon faster as much as the next guy, but the show never really gets any deeper than that.

I am straight-up ogomaxxing right now.

Marf. (by the way there totally isnt a marf subreddit guys I swear)

Transformers: Rise of the Beasts (2023)

Transformers: Rise of the Firearm to my Forehead

[1/10 · 22 July 2023]

I see people dismissing negative reviews based on a few certain factors so let me just state at the beginning here and for the record; I'm a pretty big transformers fan. I've seen the entirety of the original series, all the movies (I even like the original Bayformers), and this movie holds the honor of being the first one that I had no intention to see, but as you can tell by this review's existence, I've seen it anyways.

From the trailers alone I could tell this was going to be a dumpster fire; the photo-realistic cgi was gone in place of these grey sludge monsters. I've seen better renders in video game cutscenes. It comes as no surprise to me that ILM had nothing to do with this movie and instead had its vfx made by the company that did Sonic (2020). Can't imagine why they made that decision or how this movie still cost 200 million dollars, but it's going to cost them as its the first Transformers movie to lose money...

Sure enough, even after some touch-up (you can see trailer comparisons on the internet), the movie still looks atrocious. That final fight scene where grey is the only color on the screen, made me miss the bayformers fights quite a bit. I, as well as everyone I was seeing it with, just made fun of the movie the entire time and we were completely unengaged. They talk about this stupid mcguffin dorito key for an hour and act like the only way to stop it from teleporting Unicron to the earth is to put in this code to turn it off, but it doesn't work, and then Optimus just smashes it and it DOES THE SAME EXACT THING THEY WERE TRYING TO ACCOMPLISH. I guess the writers weren't aware that they just made the entire battle irrelevant, why did they not just shoot it?

The music in this 'movie' was also horrible, who's idea was it to have a rap song playing over a giant robot monkey smashing these stupid grey spider-goblins? This kind of music does not fit in with transformers at all, to be honest I don't understand why hollywood keeps trying to do this trend, it almost never works and is always very out of place. The score itself was pretty bland as well, I saw this thing only 20 minutes ago and I can't think of a single theme from the movie, except for when they played Jablonsky's Autobots theme at the very end, and I think they had a subtle Unicron Medley playing during the Unicron dialogue scenes, which was a nice touch.

Usually I don't have too much of a problem with the human characters in the Transformers movies, but man these were the worst human characters by far in this franchise, which is surprising given how theres only like two humans in this movie that you see for more than 2 minutes. I have already forgotten the girls name, and as for Noah, you can't just say he used to be a soldier and then refuse to show anything that would back that up for the entire movie. He shows no experience or control in combat situations, and if anything this museum girl is better at it then he is until he gets a power rangers suit that just does the work for him. (I kind of agree with Optimus when he says "he doesn't look like a soldier".)

As for this mcguffin key, I have never cared less. I also don't get why they try to say Unicron can use it to get to more worlds, sort of like the space bridge used in Dark of the Moon, and yet they show the Terrorcons having to activate it on earth so Unicron can get there. What exactly is the purpose of this device if Unicron is already sending his minions to the place to set up this giant tower so he can just get there faster? Since when does Unicron, the planet eater, need a space dorito to get to other galaxies? Why would that ever be something his minions need to take care of? Don't get me wrong I was crazy hyped to finally get Unicron in these movies, especially after whatever the crap they were trying to do in the Last Knight with the Transformers: Prime Unicron ripoff that does nothing but rise a few horns out of the ground, but they should've come up with a story to incorporate him in without another 'end of the world uh oh unicron' kind of threat. Also remember this is all supposedly to be in-line with both Bumblebee and the Bayformers? So how did everybody forget about the planet-eating giga robot in the 90s around the time of Transformers (2007)? They really need to just throw in the towel and do a complete reboot, you don't need to directly connect the movies to satisfy both audiences, especially if you can't succeed at either as shown by this movie.

Also I can't get over the fact that Bumblebee dies and just nobody really cares, Optimus throws a piece of a train and then they just carry his corpse around the world for no reason, just for him to be magically resurrected at the finale with some sort of energon rock? What even is this? Why did they even do this? Everyone watching the movie knows Bumblebee is in the 5 sequel movies after this, and also you can't really convince modern audiences of fakeout deaths these days unless you do it properly. Kill wheeljack or something. They had this same exact fakeout death for him not once, but twice before in this film franchise and I honestly felt his death was less impactful than any of the recent Disney fakeout deaths, which is really saying something.

Also how is it possible that the transformers themselves have even less personality in this movie than in the Michael Bay films? There are characters in this movie that have 0 lines, Rhinox just roars at the screen once, and then you got these psychopaths in the youtube comments saying he had more 'personality' than any character in the previous films (Genuinely think I'm losing my mind when I read through these). Also what on earth did they do to my boy wheeljack? They showed him with his accurate appearance and voice in the previous movie and was looking forward to seeing a version that wasn't Albert Einstein (sorry, Que), but what even was that honestly? Optimus I guess doesn't like humans at first but then kinda does at the end? Other than that I can't really say if any other characters even have an arc at all except maybe Primal? But even he doesn't show up until the 3rd quarter of the movie where he just goes "its optimus primal time" and he then tears up the grid iron like nobody's business (Props to you if you got that reference).

Actually now that I think of it Wheeljack doesn't do anything in this movie except look at Peru with his glasses and make a quip about racism. Even Arcee, who finally gets a main character spot after 7 movies, just kinda runs around in the background shooting her dart gun. Mirage and Optimus are pretty much the only characters you really get to know, and its a shame because Mirage is one of the reasons I gave this review the name you see above (I cannot stand Mirage).

Not to mention the maximals, they don't become relevant until about halfway into the movie, and its unfortunate that I can say you can have the same movie without them. Their purpose begins and ends with the fact that they just happen to be the ones who have the madeup dorito mcguffin, and then to do funny "its maximizing time" during the aforementioned abysmal grey void final battle. You can have the same exact plot with or without them, and honestly the more I hear about the deleted scenes I wonder why we didn't get this alternate version of the movie, if it truly was any better than this atrocity.

The dialogue in this movie truly is something else, I lost count how many times the characters were just saying what was happening in the moment, It felt like I was watching the Mandalorian. For example theres a moment where Noah just explains to Mirage what the transformers are, what the dorito mcguffin is, and the wacky skybeam for like a full 30 seconds in car ride and I thought I was going to have an aneurysm. There were quite a few conversations that could be entirely cut out because they didn't add anything whatsoever to the movie, they would either be just repeating themselves, or, like I said, talking about whats happening at that exact moment, as if the audience cannot follow whats happening onscreen at any given moment. Is nuance not a thing anymore?

I remember thinking 6 years ago that 'theres no way they can make a transformers movie more ridiculous than this' after watching The Last Knight, a movie I still can watch and somewhat enjoy, but man, was I so wrong. Worse yet, I think this movie is also worse than Revenge of the Fallen. The only things I like about this movie are that Peter Cullen gets a full role again, and 'till all are one' is finally brought into the movies as a tagline. Without a doubt, the worst movie of the bunch, by far. Never thought I'd see the day.

Rick and Morty (2013– )

Almost perfect, just stop doing incest, its not funny

[8/10 · 8 October 2022]

I used to rate this show 9/10 but recently, especially in season 6, the main joke has been incest. I just do not understand who finds this so funny. It was already shown before, with the infamous baby we all know and love, but Season 6 feels like some sort of coin toss. Will this be a "regular Rick and Morty adventure"? Nope its Beth doing it with her clone. Is this a Jerry and Rick adventure? Nope its Jerry trying not to do it with his mom. Its honestly getting tiring and its quite uncomfortable, and at times its quite clear the people writing the jokes seem to think incest is acceptable? The other jokes which range from graphic violence and every isle of vileness, I can ignore in small doses, but when theres now 6 episodes where the entire plot is incest and who knows what else its just frustrating.

Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness (2022)

Doctor Strange and the Multiverse of Writers who don't know what they're doing

[4/10 · 8 May 2022]

To put it simply, Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness is one of the most nonsensical chaotic movies I've ever seen, which is saying something given how the last few Marvel projects have of a similar approach. This was also, unfortunately, one of the first Marvel movies where I was waiting for it to end.

The movie is entertaining, no doubt, especially thanks to Raimi and the interesting fights and visuals, but man I still can't keep track in my head how much nonsense happens in this movie. I don't think I need to list every plothole in this review. It doesn't help that most of the movie doesn't seem to focused on Doctor Strange, but rather, Wanda, and a few other characters.

Anyways some of the key examples that show how disorderly the writing is, would be the mentioning and retconning of the last Spiderman movie, where Doctor Strange explains it openly, in front of a girl he just met and Wong, the guy who told him never to do the spell. He just explains how he ripped a hole into the multiverse, and basically ruined a childs life, erasing him from existence, and they don't follow up on it.

Why is America, supposedly the most important being in the multiverse, and constantly hunted by all sorts of beings, always just standing around and watching stuff happen with a surprised look on her face? Shouldn't she be running? Or hiding? Or maybe even trying to help? There were quite a lot of scenes where they could've just sling-ringed out of there, and honestly with the threat they had it's a bit odd that none of the 50+ or whatever characters from the MCU showed up to help, especially given Wanda's involvement. Doctor Strange states that the entire multiverse is at stake and yet they just get Wong and a bunch of archers?

Theres also the fact that they mustered the strength of this fortress to sacrifice their lives for a girl that showed up the other day and said she could open portals to other realities. Its also frustrating to see that while Raimi certainly agrees that Wanda is a straight-up villain for this movie; Wandavision (you know, an entire show made to give her this backstory and lesson about hurting others for her own family fantasy), was kind of thrown out the window. They act like her enslaving an entire town, knowing they were suffering, and forcing them to play through her fantasy because she got sad was justified. "Seems unfair" line was either written by a 14 year old or the person who wrote it had never seen Wandavision. They continually act like she has some sort of right to see her fake kids, that she "sacrificed" something, but the fact remains what she did was messed up. I do not understand how I'm supposed to feel bad for this very evil individual, especially right after the horrors she enacted on an innocent town.

Also the movie was, naturally, in classic Marvel style, inconsistent and a bit odd, like how the Darkhold was supposed to be the ultimate evil, most corruptible thing, but Doctor Strange can use it no problem? Its a tool that can be used for good? Why was evil doctor strange, supposedly the ultimate doctor strange who has killed possibly thousands of other sorcerer supreme's + the power of the darkhold, killed with music notes and impaled on a fence after 2 minutes? Also why was the cinematography abysmal? Some of the shots, especially the scene where Scarlet Witch is dreamwalking, looked like it was from a particularly bad episode of Doctor Who.

I don't think I need to even get into the illuminati, blackbolt, and whatever that entire sequence even was.

The CGI was noticeably worse than usual, quite a few shots that look like video game cutscenes, especially the camera scene in the illuminati room. I don't understand how a studio with this much money and this much talent continues to get lazier. It makes movies 20 years older than it look better...

Honestly the whole movie just felt like such a mess, but what got me was how they credited the minotaur and the guy who had one line whining about his dead cats in the highlights, in front of one of the main characters.

It wasn't their worst, thats for sure. The darker elements actually surprised me a bit, wasn't expecting someones brain to be crushed, and the cameos weren't as awful as they could've been, I just wish everything was more thought out, laid out, and that they actually respected their main freaking character Doctor Stephen Strange. He was basically a joke in this movie. Its just disappointing as this was one of the few upcoming MCU movies that I had high hopes for, but it would seem, as usual, the writers had too much to handle and didn't know what to do with this Multiverse monster they created since Loki This was yet another movie that wasn't written when they started filming, as proven by their laughable behind the scenes special where a lot of them, even the head writers, said they just had no idea what they were doing.

Oh yeah, the after credits scenes aren't worth it. Watch them on youtube if you're really that interested...

Star Wars: The Clone Wars: Dangerous Debt (2020) Season 7, Episode 7

Filler, really?

[3/10 · 10 April 2020]

No spoilers, but you could actually remove this episode entirely from the season and you wouldn't know the difference, because the entire episode is filler. I already thought the first episode of this Arc was pretty slow, and now this.

Shrek Forever After (2010)

Shrek Forever After Wasnt as Great as the others

[7/10 · 14 February 2019]

Shrek 4 was not movie-worthy and definitely didnt live up to its name.

Shrek: Forever After is the "final" movie in the Shrek movie series, "ending" the Shrek story. However, the entire movie just felt pointless. It begins with Shrek's firstborn's birthday party. Then it ends with Shrek's firstborn birthday party. The entire movie is just how Shrek learns about family and then everything goes back to the beginning. This movie definitely was NOT a cinematic conclusion, it would have done better as a mini-movie and not a feature film.

However it is still a Shrek movie and it included the classic characters and still had the same good jokes. I guess its fine for kids but honestly people who are dedicated Shrek fans will be disappointed by this movie.

Star Wars: Rebels (2014–2018)

Stop Pretending this is a Clone Wars sequel, its just bad

[2/10 · 8 July 2018]

First, before I begin, here is my main problem with this show; they need to stop marketing this show for adults. Its obviously for little kids but they keep pumping in Legends characters and Clone Wars characters to get older audiences to watch, even though they taint the characters. This isn't a sequel for Clone Wars, its barely a prequel to the Original Trilogy in regards to the Rebellion.

My 2nd biggest gripe with this show are its annoying characters, besides Kanan, wish the show focused on him more than the infamous space Aladdin. The atmosphere of Rebels is pretty bad, and it doesn't seem to know what kind of tone it wants as it goes to goofy speeder heist with the funny droid to Darth Maul murdering civilians (albeit in a cutaway, as is required by this show for little kids). Its cgi and animation are also lackluster, and especially bad when compared to Clone Wars. Every character has the same exact basic mannerisms and little emotions when talking, they use the same two stupid camera shots for every scene, and it all looks just very flat and rubbery. They tried countless cool things with the show, like Vader, Thrawn, and that AT-TE episode, but most of them fell flat. You like Vader? Well sorry, he randomly decides to stop hunting the Rebels after Season 2. You think the inquisitors are a cool new force to be reckoned with? Sorry they cant do their one job and are basically just turned into stormtroopers with lightsabers. Oh you like Thrawn, the coolest Legends character ever invented? Sorry, he's just gonna fail at his every plan to kill just 4 Rebels for the entire course of his time on the show, and then get whale-napped.

The thing is, I wouldn't have any of these gripes if the show just stopped trying to pretend to be this 'everything burger' of a Star Wars show for Clone Wars fans and adults. The way some people talk about this show you'd think it was the best thing ever made, but I honestly cannot see how that is even close to being the case. The show is incredibly boring, and its one of the few Star Wars shows (before Book of Boba Fett and Obi-wan came out, mind you) where after I finish every episode, I feel like I just wasted my time. I kept watching, stuck around for season premiers and finale's on DisneyXD, but it never quite just did it for me. I watched the entire thing and I remember thinking to myself "I don't think I'm ever going to rewatch this" after nearly every episode. I don't really understand why they had to bring Maul back for the 5th time, I don't understand why the Empire is extremely stupid in this show, I don't understand why they keep putting in cool things from Legends like the Tie Defender and then just wasting them.

Another gripe I have is how every episode is practically exactly the same: They want to do something bad to the Empire, they steal stormtrooper armor, there's a firefight, they escape, the end. Besides the bigger episodes in later seasons this is basically the show in general. Perhaps the most frustrating part of it all is how this show was marketed as the Rebel Alliance origin story of sorts, but as we learn around halfway through, the Rebel Alliance is already a thing, Leia is basically already running it full swing, and even invites the main characters but they decline. Kinda makes me wonder what the point of this all is. The only episodes I found worthwhile were the Kanan episodes with that big tree guy whos name I'm not gonna bother to look up, and, even though I don't agree with the fact that he should be in this show: Maul's arc. Even the Maul episode was just frustrating though, we got like 5 minutes of Maul and Obi-wan, and then 20 of Ezra doing literally nothing with the droid for the entire episode.

Season 1 was a little good, but I was bored watching it by the end, I was bored with it until the finale, and I'm still not interested in ever re-watching it. It's all just so empty to me and is way too "kiddie" for my tastes.

Bee Movie (2007)

Gift from God

[10/10 · 8 July 2018]

This movie is not exactly supposed to be taken seriously, it is a humorous pun-filled piece of art, as it is by the comedian Jerry Seinfeld, who voices Barry B. Benson. This movie is bee-autiful.

Although this movie is basically an animated comedy film, it does have some good messages in the movie, the biggest message being how much small jobs matter, and teamwork. I don't really understand how kids are supposed to find court scenes entertaining but you got the fat guy rolling around so I guess thats comical to some degree.

Despite everyone framing this as a "meme movie", and thus not seen as actually that funny, I find it has quite a large amount of iconic lines and jokes, obviously you weren't gonna get through this review without hearing "ya like jazz?". Told you. Ray Liotta Private Select, Vanessa crashing a plane and perishing in a fiery explosion, Beeish. It may be an animated movie for kids but I still will put it on par with Shrek-level comedy. Good job Jerry, and thanks Dreamworks.

Ya like jazz.

Solo: A Star Wars Story (2018)

Better than you think, but not as good as it could have been

[7/10 · 25 May 2018]

SPOILER: Well, this movie was better than i expected, because, like everyone else, I thought a movie centered on a character that's been in 4 star wars movies already wouldn't have been that good. However it was a good "stand-alone" film and it had its moments, honestly it had a lot more language than any other Star Wars film, but other than that, it wasn't half bad. However, I can get over these tiny mistakes:

o The Falcon, in the movie, doesnt have that iconic notch between the mandibles like it has in A New Hope -> The Last Jedi, but they do this on purpose to show off that its "brand new" and theres no modifications. However, in Revenge of the Sith, Lucas purposefully put the Falcon in the beginning of the film as an Easter Egg. So, in a way, this movie isnt accurate, because there are Imperial Stormtroopers and Star Destroyers, indicating this is after the Jedi Purge.

o A cool adventure, but its lacking some things people were hoping to see in this movie. I mean, they made up a lot of characters in this story, but no Boba Fett? (The movie everyone originally wanted?) It seems this story is restricted to only, I guess you can say "non-canon" characters, planets, etc. (Besides Han and Chewie but i guess thats it.)

BIG SPOILER: Darth Maul makes a cameo near the end of the movie. This was supposedly the big reveal which i guess is supposed to set up the plot for the Obi-Wan movie. However I thought it was sort of out of place that this Sith Lord was talking to Qi-Ra as if she was his apprentice or something. (He also shows off his lightsaber, again, just a way to get more people excited for Obi-wan)

Shrek (2001)

Lets Shrekking Go Best Film Ever

[10/10 · 15 April 2018]

10/10 A good movie has many layers, and while half of those layers are memes such as the sentence you're reading right now, at the end of the day Shrek is quite a decent, wholesome fairytale story.

Obviously most like Shrek for its memeability, but I honestly find it to be a genuinely good, rewatchable film. Its got great messages about not judging a book by its cover and its sort of like a twist on the "Beauty and the Beast". The film in itself is also iconic, and really represents the golden age of Dreamworks. It honestly doesn't even look that bad and holds up today as well, animation-wise. Even the music by Hans Zimmer is well done, and iconic enough that Dreamworks uses the main theme as their title card music. I find it worth noting that "All Star" is pretty much synonymous with Shrek now, and I don't think anybody sees that as a bad thing.

Shrek is a banger of a film, get out of his swamp and watch this film, enjoy the peak of human achievement.

Pacific Rim: Uprising (2018)

The only thing Uprising is the vomit out of my esophagus

[1/10 · 24 March 2018]

I personally have written a 21-page review on why I genuinely think Pacific Rim: Uprising is the worst sequel ever made, as I love Pacific Rim, but I will save your time and give a quick summary as to why this movie is terrible.

First off, it completely dismisses the original movie. It retcons the goal of the Kaiju, the way Jaegers are built and operated, the 3 remaining characters from the first movie, the PPDC, the list goes on. They literally say, I'm not kidding; that the entire goal of the kaiju invasion was for them to get into this volcano in Japan and blow up, in order to destroy the entire world. If you've seen the first movie, you're probably convinced now that Uprising was written by a 14 year old, and I don't blame you.

I could go on and on about the retcons, but this movie has other areas that need heavy criticizing. It should be noted that a big red flag for this movie is the fact that Boyega and DeKnight both are quoted with saying they watched the original and were annoyed how the Jaegers/Kaiju were "too slow" in the original. Hence, in this awful excuse for a film, the 8,000+ ton robots do ninja flips and sprint around, as well as throwing each other as if gravity no longer exists.

They also, for whatever reason, purposefully destroy the cities they're supposed to be protecting during the fights, theres one shot of the sword-jaegar (who's name I can't remember) just runs down a street, chopping every building on either side of it in half for literally no reason. Theres even a line by Boyega where he says "how many buildings can this thing take?!" as he's using a weapon that seems to be purposefully designed to grab civilian buildings and vehicles to use as weapons.

This review's getting long so I'll just list off some other gripes: Soundtrack is bland and forgettable, only thing I remember is main theme from the OG Pacific Rim when its reused for a montage scene, sound design is awful, machine guns the size of a school bus shouldn't sound like a .22 with the pitch toned down. The cgi is abysmal, rubbery and flat, and the artists don't bother to make more than one model for the jaegers. (No battle damage, for example). The cinematography is abysmal, every single shot is by a free-floating camera, and every fight is set during mid-day with no clouds in completely cgi environments. (Remember the many lightning storm at night fights from the original?)

The plot is also quite ridiculous, avoiding the question as to why the government would still be dumping trillions into skyscraper-sized fighting robots 10 years after the Kaiju were permanently stopped, apparently, Jaegers are apparently just as easy to build as a car, because not only are criminals apparently slapping them together and having street fights with them, thus requiring a "jaeager police force", but a 14 year old girl builds a fully functioning one in her garage with no assistance and no heavy equipment and then immediately takes it on a test run without issue.

I also don't understand why the jaegers are all piloted by literal children in this movie, I don't even remember any of their names and just remember them all screaming, playing the Troll song (not joking), and flipping off Kaiju. I also don't understand why the aforementioned 14 year old girl gets a free pass to this "Jaeger academy" after doing the exact thing the PPDC (which still exists for some reason) makes very illegal.

I haven't even gotten into how they ruined Newt, the whole schpiel with the jaeger/kaiju hybrids, the rocket welding to "Gipsy Avenger's" hand, how any of the kaiju stuff works when there hasnt been a kaiju in a decade, how Pentecost didn't even have a son, there's so much to criticize with this movie, I loathe it quite a lot, and I honestly think it should never be watched by anybody, especially fans of Pacific Rim (2013). Theres a reason Del Toro didn't make it, and I honestly feel bad for the guy, they really turned his magnum opus into just another Power Rangers/Transformers piece of garbage.

Besiege (2015 Video Game)

One of the best physics engines i've seen so far

[9/10 · 22 February 2018]

At first, I felt like this game was just going to be a mid-evil Robocraft, but I was truly mistaken. It is a super-realistic in-depth building/fighting game that requires realistic physics and at least some minimal engineering know-how. This can be slightly aggravating to somebody who doesn't know how some things work in real life (imagine), but it is still a super addictive game.

While its frustrating how laggy it can become, especially in multiplayer, it is without a doubt the best 'vehicle-building' game I've ever played, there truly are no limits to what you can do, and pitting you're perfectly engineered war machine against others only makes it better. I even enjoy the level editor quite a lot. This game really shines through the workshop, where you can find some truly maddening masterpieces people have made. While you're building a car that cant even turn correctly, some lunatic is making a fully functional walking/driving Transformer that can combine with 6 other fully functional walking/driving Transformers to become a fully controllable combiner.

I'm not gonna lie, I miss the era where the game was more "classic" and there weren't panels, but panels have truly revolutionized this game and you can now pretty much make photo-realistic perfect vehicles by conforming the panels however you wish.

I'd give it a 10/10 if it ran a little better, but overall, astounding game.

Heroes & Generals (2014 Video Game)

I'd say this game is good but unfortunately, the German faction

[6/10 · 11 February 2018]

Well, the graphics can be compared to Roblox, but other than that, this game is still pretty addicting. There is a surprisingly large variety of tanks, jeeps, and many other vehicles. They allow plenty of customization to your weapons, and other than that, the game is actually not too bad.

The only thing wrong with this game is its horrible balancing. Almost every player wants to play as Germany because their tanks/guns are overpowered to a comical degree. So there aren't enough players playing as the Soviets, and its actually rare to fight against them. Plus, the developers really don't spend that much time working on this game as you might expect with other free games, and they seem to only add new stuff once every 4 months instead of fixing some of the biggest issues. Also, thanks to the fact that its free, the game is incredibly grindy and will take you many, many months to get good tanks/aircraft. (And that's just for one faction)

Impact angle too high.

EDIT 2023: I may have given this game the negative review it deserved, and hated many things about it, but it is truly sad that it is now gone. The game didn't really improve since I wrote my review, rather the new devs thought it'd be a good idea to add a 3,000,000 credit submachine gun that's actually less effective than every other submachine gun in the game (not joking), and a battlepass that only gives aesthetics, and then complain when nobody was giving their life savings for actual garbage. They then expected people to fund them 3 million dollars for a remake, a self-proclaimed "exit strategy" for their company, and naturally they didn't get anywhere near to that goal, and Heroes and Generals was shut down. I was flying my Curtiss Owl over Lunéville when everything froze, and that accursed message box appeared on my screen. A dark day, but at least the pain is finally over...

Transformers: The Last Knight (2017)

Not as good as the first, but still a must-see compared to Age of Extinction.

[6/10 · 20 June 2017]

You would think, considering the previous Transformers films, that this movie would be a repeat of Age of Extinction and just have nothing but swearing and explosions every 10 seconds, then you are about 50% correct. This film actually had a STORY, a good story. They introduced a lot of new characters and was actually more exciting to watch then the previous garbage film.

Out of the the entire transformers franchise, this one is definitely up there, at least behind the original, and Dark of the Moon. Sure, it had the classics, a ton of explosions and mostly nonstop fighting throughout the entire movie, but the story made up for it. They actually attempted to connect everything together, but we'll see if any of it pays off.

I recommend this film to anyone who likes the Transformers film franchise.

The Thundermans (2013–2018)

The Worst Show On Nickelodeon

[1/10 · 27 February 2017]

This show is without a doubt, the worst show currently on Nick.

The acting is terrible. The actors are always talking very loudly, and Chloe acts as if shes 16, and its pretty obvious the only reason they added her character was to copy Full House(A good sitcom).

The writing is pretty bad. Every episode has the same stuff in it. Nora hurts Billy, they make the boys dumber than the girls, Max and Phoebe learn no lessons and continue to bicker and cause huge problems, they are always lieing to each other CONSTANTLY, and their Parents don't do anything about it until the end of the episode.

There is almost no positive messages in the show. The kids always fight, the parents aren't even responsible, the family is lieing to each other and sometimes even spends thousands of dollars from their parents account on useless stuff. In the end, they make sort things out, but its completely unrealistic.

There's also that horrible laugh-track. It plays it if ANYTHING happens: Nora hurts Billy: laugh track. Max insults someone: laugh track. Some trips: laugh track. Someone says something that's almost funny: laugh track. It plays it over and over and over again during the entire show, and it can get extremely irritating.

If Nick can hear me...STOP IT WITH THESE SITCOMS! And delete this one first!

The Loud House (2014– )

Nope

[5/10 · 28 November 2016]

Nickelodeon is having a bad streak of crappy sitcoms and cartoons alike, Spongebob lost its touch after season 6. This show was supposed to have more "positive messages", but it was instead kind of really, really forced to be that way. All the jokes leave you staring, and you get this cringy feel after they keep using the same lackluster unintelligent joke for the entire episode. Sure, it has some positive family messages, but those are all deemed useless after they fill the show with political nonsense and other junk like that, even entire episodes about turning off your TV to save the environment. (what).

The animation style is O-K, as they are clearly trying something new. This is actually one of Nickelodeon's first trys at making a completely G-rated family cartoon, but of course there are some edgy jokes mixed in, some even went too far, and they are kinda wasted on the young audience that this show was clearly meant for.

I guess what i'm trying to say is im happy Nickelodeon is finally coming up with some original ideas after like, 20 years of Spongebob, (Seriously its spongebob's 20th anniversary); because Nick keeps rebooting old stuff, such as TMNT, (ew), and they are on like their 7th superhero-themed sitcom now. But all that aside, this show is kinda 50-50. It has a really positive attitude and stuff and may be funny towards younger kids, but they keep mixing in really lackluster jokes that are SUPPOSED to appeal to older kids or adults but it just leaves us asking "was that supposed to be funny?"

Phineas and Ferb (2007–2024)

Amazing Show, but Repetitive

[8/10 · 6 September 2016]

This show is super funny and has some cool fighting scenes, but it gets very repetitive, but every once in a while they will make some new funny jokes, but other than that, the same thing happens in every episode. They will build some huge thing, and then Doofenshmirtz will make it disappear, where Candace fails to "bust" them. Candace is a bit of an annoying character, she constantly wants to tattle on her brothers, despite that they build amazing things, and sometimes they build it for her. I would like Those three bugs that appear in "Doof 101" to have their own show, they were one of the funniest things in this show.

I would recommend this to everyone, it is funny and a great show.

SpongeBob SquarePants (1999– )

It had its Golden Age, is now Lackluster.

[8/10 · 6 September 2016]

Anybody who's watched this show when it was in the middle of season 1-6, you know the REAL Spongebob.

Anyways, as you can guess, this show seriously went downhill on season 7.