Root canals without anesthetic are more fun. They let potential suicides watch this movie, just so they know that there are REALLY people out there who deserve to die.... such as the scriptwriter for this film. The directors name is Goth? I was going to look this up to see if it was real, but then realized I don't care. If he didn't make that name up, he certainly should have. "Failure of imagination" should be this guy's middle name. Anyone who rated this thing higher than 1 star needs to go see their "dealer" immediately, and demand a refund, or at least something that isn't cut with strychnine. Random detritus: The title comes from (how clever) the screen names of the two lead characters, one of whom is named "Cold" and the other of whom is NOT NAMED DARK. Guess that would have been "far too clichéd" for the "high level talent" they hired to script this "monster". The visual highlite of this film is a scene (I wish I were making this up) that depicts, in all it's raw power and majesty, a British men's bathroom Glory Hole (!!!) (Vomit at your own discretion). Another post comments that there is a Rubiks cube in this same scene. That is probably true, but I would have to re-watch this "horror" to verify that this is true, and I will do that the day after they remove both my eyeballs. Movies I liked less than this one: Reds (worst film of all time). 90% of everything that has "National Lampoon" in the title. Freddy Got Fingered. Joe Dirt. Die Hard 2. Movies I liked more than this: Faces of Death 18: Girls Gone Wild Edition. "A Starters Guide to Holistic Proctology". Any Driver's Ed film. Home movies of my bachelor party (don't laugh at my pain, please).
In sum: A random pick from basic cable is going to be a much wiser investment of your time. Just close your eyes and hit the buttons on your remote. You may thank me later.
In sum: A random pick from basic cable is going to be a much wiser investment of your time. Just close your eyes and hit the buttons on your remote. You may thank me later.
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