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Lucifer: Spoiler Alert (2020)
SEASON 5A: A downgrade for LUCIFER, with questionable concepts and even more questionable execution
NOTE: My score of 8/10 is for the episode SPOILER ALERT specifically, not this half-season overall.
SPOILERS FOR "Lucifer! Lucifer! Lucifer!" AND SEASONS 1-4 ONLY; SUGGESTIVE SPOILERS OTHERWISE
I've never been a huge fan of LUCIFER - I enjoyed the first season, but where I expected future seasons to properly expand on its ideas I find it only dug itself a hole that got deeper with each season; season four was almost as good as LUCIFER's freshman season, but was let down severely by an annoying addition to the cast with Eve, as well as having its two final episodes be cliché-ridden messes. For this reason, my review is likely to be harsher than one from those that have a love for this series, but I still like to try to be as fair as I can be. However, I find it near impossible to call the first half of LUCIFER's fifth season anything other than its worst series of episodes yet. This is not to say the season is without merit - far from it - but the show seems to be steadily losing what made it stand out among the rest in its preceding years.
ACTING
To begin, one of this season's most glaring issues has been the quality of the acting. While the cast have mostly been able to give good performances in seasons past, and while Ellis continues to carry it, there's a significant sense that everyone on screen is so tired of doing what they're doing. The variety of core actors seem to all have lost their passion for the series, at least that's what shows on screen. To be honest, I can't really blame them - by far LUCIFER's greatest overall flaw is its unwavering dedication to the crime-of-the-week over the fantastical overarching narrative. Police procedurals are an extremely saturated market and have been for decades, and LUCIFER's shtick of 'It's the same as all the others except we have the devil!' only carried it above the rest for so long; now, LUCIFER has overstayed its welcome, especially considering it favours its worn-out whodunits over its more original and far more interesting narrative premise. If I were Tom Ellis, I too would be exhausted from carrying this brittle concept on my back for 4 years straight. Put simply, none of the cast have much, if any, energy or passion for their roles anymore and it shows. Occasionally, someone will pull a great performance out of nowhere (for example, Alejandro delivers a great scene at Charlotte's grave in OUR MOJO), but the general portrayals are very downplayed. The one exception to this in LUCIFER's fifth series is Lauren German, who seriously stepped up and delivered an unusually great performance in her role this season. However, she was the only improvement across the board, and again, the vast majority of main players just seem drained.
WRITING & NARRATIVE
In season one, we learned that the devil, an immortal being, is physically vulnerable when he's around some seemingly random human, Chloe Decker. This is interesting; why does she make him weaker; how does Lucifer feel about this; how will this service the story going forward? In season two, we dealt with Lucifer and Amenadiel's mother coming to earth. This is interesting; what are her motives; what will she accomplish; how will this service the story going forward? In season three, we deal with the return of Lucifer's wings and the re-appearance of Cain, humanity's first murderer. This is interesting; what will Lucifer do with his wings; why has Cain sought Lucifer out; and it's been three seasons, when will someone figure out Lucifer's actual identity? In season four, we deal with Lucifer's reacquaintance with Eve, the first human woman. This isn't that interesting, and didn't serve the story that much necessarily. In season five, we find out that Lucifer has an evil twin brother who has never been mentioned nor even alluded to within the series prior, Michael. This is not at all interesting. This is cheap. This is terrible writing. This is a complete betrayal of the audience's intelligence. And while I was able to accept it as a concept for the remainder of the episodes past his reveal, I never stopped being angry about it. If even once, Lucifer, Amenadiel, or Mazikeen had mentioned anything that could allude to there being a Michael out there somewhere, this would have been okay. But this 'plot twist' is a half-assed subversion of expectations and clearly shows the writers' burnout. That's what happens when you drag a concept out for longer than it naturally allows for; this was LUCIFER's jump-the-shark moment.
Or maybe that moment came when episode four, IT NEVER ENDS WELL FOR THE CHICKEN, was a film-noir parody that failed to service the story it told in any discernible way and half-assedly tied itself into Mazikeen's character arc, whilst doing absolutely nothing else of value, neither for entertainment nor narrative. I love film noir as a genre, always have. And homages to the genre in television can absolutely be done well (take a look at IT'S ALWAYS SUNNY IN PHILADELPHIA's recent THE JANITOR ALWAYS MOPS TWICE, for example). The problem comes when the decision to do a film noir episode is done simply for the sake of doing a film noir episode. You just know the writers' room one day went, 'Hey, let's do a film noir episode', and everyone else was like 'Okay, yeah, sure, why not'. It wasn't done out of a love for the genre. It wasn't done to service or complement the narrative, self-contained or overarching, in any meaningful way. It was done for the sake of doing it. It's meaningless filler drivel. The one thing of note it adds to the series is the origin of Lucifer's immortality ring and his vow to Mazikeen's mother, all of which could have been instead tied up in one very simple conversation between Lucifer and Maze at any other point in the span of the seven important episodes.
The mid-season finale, titled SPOILER ALERT, was in fact an actually good episode (hence my 8/10 score on this review). While Michael continues to be a disgrace of an idea with hideous dialogue and worse characterization, the episode was a great bookend to many of this season's overarching plots, whilst also setting up the back eight episodes to come and tying its crime-of-the-week shtick into the overall narrative, something the show has done very rarely before but almost always to good effect. A better outcome would be removing the procedural aspect entirely, but this is likely the best compromise we're ever going to get. Its cliffhanger, too, was a bit clichéd and somewhat contrived, but an important and interesting moment that's been foreshadowed since LUCIFER's pilot episode; a satisfying few seconds for sure.
MISCELLANEOUS ELEMENTS
The camerawork in LUCIFER continues to be serviceable but without artful thought put into it, although I noticed multiple shots that were very clever and fun (i.e. the camera going over a door from the hallway into an apartment room in one clean shot, Lucifer being pushed into a glass window and shattering it in frozen time thus leaving its broken bits in midair, Dan's freshly-fired gun shown against a blazing blue light background). The music continues to be uninspired and forgettable, while generally servicing the scenes it plays in well enough (although the soundtrack for the final fight scene in the finale was a notable step-up, with cinematic and grungy violin complementing the action well). And the show still puts far too much focus on its procedural aspects as well as the personal lives of characters that don't really matter that much (Ella's situation this season was terribly uninteresting until the extremely predictable twist in the finale, and I can't force myself to give any two sorts of crap about what Linda is thinking or feeling at all).
CONCLUSION
By far LUCIFER's weakest (half-)season yet, not without its merit but hurt by significantly weaker writing and acting nonetheless. After the promising first season, despite the occasional episode that really expands upon its ideas in a meaningful and entertaining way (A GOOD DAY TO DIE, GOD JOHNSON, A DEVIL OF MY WORD), LUCIFER has yet to really reach its full potential, choosing instead to dig itself a hole that gets deeper with every passing season.
Papers, Please: The Short Film (2018)
PAPERS PLEASE: A fine adaptation of an indie classic
As a fan of the original game, I put off watching this film for the longest time, due mainly to the fact that I wasn't sure how well this concept could be executed in such a way. I figured most of the game's draw came from actually being involved in the inspections, and while I still think this is true to some small degree, the film does a good job at bringing this video game world into a more cinematic experience.
To begin, PAPERS PLEASE: THE SHORT FILM has many virtues that elevate it to its heights. Igor Savochkin gives a very good performance in the role of the protagonist, riding that fine line between being blank enough for the viewer to insert themselves into his position, while still remaining his own intriguing and believable character with goals, motivations, thoughts, feelings, and humanity. His portrayal was occasionally not involved enough (the ending being the biggest example of this), but most of his work in this film was very very good. Other actors, in Tokarev, Tsygankova, Panyukov, and Kravtsova, all give short of great but good performances in their respective roles as well.
The film looks pretty good as well, using bright and noticeable colours as thematic emblems for emotions and countries, as well as utilizing a higher-quality camera than that of typical shorts, for satisfyingly crisp video. The plot of the film is simple, but undeniably well-made, intriguing, and believable; seeing the progression from the Inspector being rigidly devoted to his job, followed by his shame and regret, followed then by his apologetic and forgiving relaxation of the rules, to his downfall caused by his one and only exception. It plays well into the important themes of the film while also being an awesomely haunting conclusion.
If I had to come up with any legitimate criticisms of PAPERS PLEASE: THE SHORT FILM, it would be the multiple montages of the Inspector granting and denying access to Arstotzka. While the orchestral cover of the game's main motif as well as countless easter eggs that fans of the original will surely recognize are both welcome additions, they contrasted too heavily with the real meat of the film, really just ending up as cheesy, obviously padded time. This is not too much of a problem however, given the film's mere 10-minute runtime.
Overall, a successful adaptation of one of the best indie video games of all time. I'm very glad I checked it out and I'm impressed with how well it managed to translate aspects of Arstotzka from game to film, being able to balance being a rewarding experience for longtime fans while remaining an accessible one for those unfamiliar with the source material.
BioShock (2007)
BIOSHOCK: A slightly frustrating third act fails to undercut the absolute magic of this turning-point gem
I first bought BIOSHOCK thanks to this year's Steam Summer Sale, but my initial experience with it was a negative one: I found the atmosphere far too claustrophobic and the gameplay too stressful, which led to me actually refunding the game. However, I found it nigh impossible to get the superb narrative concept, themes, and the setting out of my head. When the Collection went back on sale for 75% off less than a week after the Summer Sale had ended, I knew I was being given a miraculous second chance to experience something amazing.
Gameplay & Enemies - THE ONE-TWO PUNCH
Gameplay is simultaneously both one of BIOSHOCK's strongest and weakest aspects; in broad strokes, it's unique from other games without feeling overly complicated, though it certainly takes a few levels to get used to. However, it can very, VERY quickly become far too stressful and overwhelming, say if you accidentally trip security measures or enter an area without the right plasmid (BIOSHOCK's version of magic) on your person. This is actually really what led to me refunding the game the first time - the reason my second time through was generally much better was due to a sea of tips and tricks I received on r/Bioshock, many of which I'm not sure how I would figure out on my own -however, these paralyzing moments of stress are mostly few and far between, depending on how carefully you play.
The gunplay is satisfactory and works perfectly well, though I stopped using new weapons at all past the first five (wrench, pistol, SMG, shotgun, grenade launcher), due to finding absolutely no use for them. A unique aspect of BIOSHOCK that I'm not sure was intentional was how reliant I as the player was on my electrobolt-wrench combo, very rarely using guns at all (except to pummel big daddies with electric buck) until very late in-game.
Combining plasmids with physical weaponry is key in BIOSHOCK, though I almost constantly had my electrobolt and wrench on hand more than anything else. The electrobolt was the one and only plasmid I found to be legitimately useful throughout the entirety of the game, while others (Incinerate, Insect Swarm), are only useful in very specific moments, and others still (Hypnotize Big Daddy, Security Bullseye) I found no use for whatsoever. The game starts you with only 2 of 6 plasmid slots unlocked, which led to a lot of early-game frustrations - I'd have incinerate equipped and need telekinesis, or vice versa - but the more Adam you collect, the quicker this issue is resolved; even that first extra slot you can buy makes all the difference in the world.
The game's star enemy is the big daddy, prominent on the covers of BIOSHOCKs 1 & 2, and the toughest enemies you'll come up against by far - unless you know how to deal with them. The first 2 acts of the game really just allow you to pummel the big daddy with electric buck shots until it dies, while Act 3 makes them a bit tougher (my new strategy was 4 electric buck shots, electrobolt, and armour-piercing SMG rounds until it keels over). Hand-in-hand with the big daddies are the narrative's most important aspect, the little sisters. With big daddies sworn to protect them with their lives, little sisters are genetically modified little girls swimming with Adam, the game's currency for plasmids and upgrades - I'll talk more about them in Narrative.
The only other enemies in Rapture are loose-headed humans called splicers, who have modified themselves with Adam gathered from harvesting little sisters, and have gone insane due to the collapse of their utopia. They're not very tough nor interesting, though some of the later ones (specifically, the ones immune to electric damage) occasionally gave me a bigger challenge than the big daddies.
Narrative & Characters - SHIFTING THE BLAME
Andrew Ryan is leader of the city of Rapture: an underwater utopia driven mad by borderline magic and shady politics. Our protagonist, Jack, aboard a plane, crashes into the middle of the Atlantic Ocean, and seeks refuge in a lonesome lighthouse. This lighthouse, however, quickly proves to be as far from salvation as Jack could have hoped for, swiftly leading him to a Hell underwater. As Jack explores the twisted world under the sea, guided by the help of a man named Atlas, he uncovers disturbing secrets and horrifying truths. I won't go in-depth into the journey or the destination, but I will elaborate on certain aspects of the narrative I feel are worth discussing.
Atlas as a character was nice for most of the game. He was helpful, believable, and just flawed enough to keep us rooting for him. The second-act twist, while one of the most jaw-dropping and well-made plot twists I have ever experienced in a piece of media, served to very much undermine his character across the third act of the game. His sudden shift into Frank Fontaine was awesome on paper and shocking at first, but his new, true character falls squarely into the category of overblown villains, bad guys who reveal their evil plan whilst laughing maniacally and twirling their moo-stache. Fontaine never fell into complete comedy or eyeroll-worthy territories, but he remains a character with a disappointing arc.
Andrew Ryan, too, felt a bit too much like a classic villain, with his Anglo-American fusion accent, his brown suit, his indoor golf set, his bald head, and his slick mustache. However, I found him a slightly more compelling character than Fontaine in the end, for the sole reason that the game chose to completely overshadow him following his death, making him feel far less important and cleverly subverting player expectations. It's interesting to see how this big bad villain became relegated to backstory, making the player marvel at how they ever thought he was the worst that Rapture had to offer. It's a compelling disruption of a consumer's assumptions, and one of the most impressive aspects of BIOSHOCK's narrative.
While I overall liked the story of BIOSHOCK, and I'm not necessarily saying this as a bad thing, it was very obvious when the plot was stretching out for the sake of a 10-15 hour campaign, rather than shorter and arguably more underwhelming 6-7 hour thing. The most obvious example of this is in Fort Frolic, when Jack is completely cut off from both Atlas and Ryan. While it's one of the best parts of the game and is a very memorable gaming experience, it was beyond clear that this level of the game could be removed from the final product, and nothing of narrative importance would be lost. Much of the first 2 acts are "guilty" of this (I put guilty in quotes because I'm unsure if this is really a bad thing; if a game can still deliver memorable, quality experiences, does it really matter whether or not it's narratively important?), but the second-act twist of Atlas' identity serves to break this and focus on delivering a climax.
To my understanding, the player's choice to either 'harvest' or 'rescue' each little sister they encounter can result in two different endings. My full playthrough had no little sisters harvested, and after reading up on the other ending, I think I'm more satisfied with mine.
While I've already stated numerous times that I found the third act to be somewhat frustrating, an aspect of it that I really appreciated was the narrative decision to turn the player into a big daddy. It oddly failed to offer anything new gameplay-wise, but it made me as the player feel cooler, and it helped to flesh out one of the narrative's numerous defining themes: that of a "Big Daddy"; how God is represented as a father to humanity; how Andrew Ryan is represented as a father to Rapture; how Frank Fontaine is represented as a father to Jack; how the big daddies, and Jack, are represented, especially when Jack becomes a big daddy himself, as fathers to the liberated little sisters. A fatherly presence teeming throughout every aspect of human life.
The Sound of BioShock - HAUNTING, MAGICAL, DEFINITIVE
Sound design, voice acting, and music may be BIOSHOCK's most powerful, excellent aspects. The sound design, despite semi-frequent bugs (dialogue, ambiance, or enemy cries would sometimes fail to play), is some of the best I have ever seen in a video game - beaten only by the very recent HALF-LIFE ALYX - making it immersively simple to pinpoint an enemy's location before you can even see them. BIOSHOCK's voice acting, despite the occasional non-actor, is also some of the greatest this medium has to offer, especially with phenomenal performances from Greg Baldwin (Atlas/Fontaine), Peter Francis James (Steinman), and Armin Shimerman (Ryan). One of my favourite details in the game was being able to hear hints of Atlas' Irish tongue crack through Fontaine's grandiose New York-voiced speeches, all credited to the fantastic Greg Baldwin. On top of all this, the OST, wonderfully-composed by the very talented Garry Schyman, is some of the greatest, most haunting music a piece of media has been able to offer.
Conclusion - A TRUE SUM OF ITS PARTS
While absolutely not without its flaws, BIOSHOCK is without question one of the most interesting, impressive, thoughtful, well-crafted, and influential video games I have ever played, and I look forward to visiting the rest of the series soon.
Mythic Quest: Raven's Banquet: Quarantine (2020)
QUARANTINE: A slightly mixed bag, but an overall successful distraction
I don't really see the point of MYTHIC QUEST doing a virtual episode, but they could, so they did, and the result was mostly good, with some gripes.
-POPPY-
Likely my favourite part of the episode, QUARANTINE showcases Poppy's struggle with loneliness. Initially, she's just grinding away at work because it gives her a sense of purpose, but when all her work is done and David and Ian both say that she should stop working and take a break, she really can't handle it. It's not all doom and gloom, though, and one of the most heartwarming moments of the series thus far sees a genuinely, (hopefully) selflessly concerned Ian visit Poppy and give her a shoulder to cry on. It's a great resolution to a sad plotline, and showcases some excellent development from not only the notoriously narcissistic Ian, but from the never-ever-let-yourself-be-vulnerable Poppy as well.
-DAVID & BRAD-
A significantly weaker, but still entertaining sideplot is the facial hair bet between David and Brad. I have issues with the way this plot is set up: David's proposition of the bet feels spontaneous and somewhat forced; Brad's initial aversion to the $100,000 donation feels kind of pointless - David is still the boss, right? Brad can dislike the idea, but if David says it happens, then doesn't it still have to happen? He'd rather shave off his facial hair and eyelashes than overrule his Scrooge McDuck employee? It doesn't really make sense to me. An odd start aside, this plotline, featuring David and Brad facing off in Street Fighter, is pretty fun, and nothing more.
-TESTERS-
My biggest problem with not only this episode, but the show as a whole, is the whole plotline with Dana, Rachel, and eventually Lou. I won't go into detail about my every overall gripe with them and their stories, but I will say that their plotline in MYTHIC QUEST is so much massively weaker than any other in the entire series due to poor writing and even poorer acting. This episode, however, was probably their best yet (though, of course, that's not saying much), as it actually showcased a relationship that wasn't just Dana-does-nothing-Rachel-is-enamored-Lou-is-gross. Camera tricks for sharing snacks leads to them actually having a decent time - until, of course, Strawman Lou says there should be less women, for absolutely no reason, completely undercutting the scene. However, this plot did lead to the finale of the episode, where everyone in the office gets together in an online video meeting in order to do one large faux Rube Goldberg machine in order for Dana to eat a chip. It's over-the-top and silly, and joyful and triumphant, and it feels like a great way to wrap up this special episode of MYTHIC QUEST.
-CONCLUSION-
There are other, more minor plotlines in this episode that I didn't feel like going over, but overall, this quarantine special of MYTHIC QUEST was pretty good, with nice moments of heart and decent moments of humour to go along with. It's not the great step up I was hoping the show would make after the good first season, but maybe that jump will come in season 2. For now, this and the previous 9 episodes will be enough to tide me over if I ever crave more.
The Walking Dead: Walk with Us (2020)
WALK WITH US: This show is at its best when the plot actually progresses, which it finally does to good effect
I haven't been pleased with season 10, nor with the show overall since the season 6 cliffhanger happened. This season has been slow, not without its merits, but outweighed by its own faults nonetheless. Thankfully, this episode provides many important story beats that are mostly handled really well.
THE GROUP IS SPLIT UP, BUT ALL TRYING TO REACH THE SAME ENDPOINT (AGAIN (AGAIN (AGAIN)))
I don't have too much to talk about here. Yumiko is played by the talented Eleanor Matsuura who delivers an excellent performance in this episode (in the one scene she has). Her emotions are understandable, and her punching Carol in the face surprised and delighted me. Carol is one of my favourite TV characters of all time, but she's been absolutely falling apart this season. It makes sense why, but it's not satisfying or interesting to watch. Her getting punched felt cathartic.
Eugene is still an awful character who serves little to no purpose on this show, and I absolutely fail to see why or how he has lasted as long as he has. Maybe if he had some sort of fan appeal I'd get it, but I've never heard of anyone liking him, so I'm just confused and tired of him. He's Sheldon Cooper in the zombie apocalyse. Blargh.
Gamma's death was predictable but exciting. Ryan Hurst's portrayal of Beta has a terrifying screen presence, and I'm glad he's staying around for a little while longer.
THE KIDS ARE ALRIGHT
Earl Sutton is a big example of my problems with THE WALKING DEAD in its current state. We're meant to feel something, we're meant to admire, we're meant to appreciate, but everything feels so fabricated. I have no stakes in his character, his arc, or really, the show overall. At least Cailey Fleming as Judith can act surprisingly well (even I can't cry on command).
NEGAN HAS A THING FOR BALD LADIES
Obviously the best part of the episode. Negan gave Alpha so many chances to stay human. She's too far gone. Deep down, she realizes it, but that's all too clouded by the animal inside her. And so Negan does what we always knew Negan would do, and slices her out of the picture. It's satisfying, it's surprising (only in the sense that the story is actually moving forward), and it's one of the last things this show can still do well.
Overall, the best episode since last season. Not perfect, but entertaining popcorn programming with some really great qualities, and really, isn't that what television is all about?
Westworld: Parce Domine (2020)
PARCE DOMINE: Slick and well-crafted; let down by a disjointed structure and is confusing for the wrong reasons
Season 1 of WESTWORLD is most likely my favourite TV season of all time, while season 2 was a sizeable letdown (but not without its merits). After seeing the writers admit their mistakes from last season, I was more optimistic about season 3, but feared that maybe the magic of the first two seasons would be lost without the Westworld in WESTWORLD. Based on this extended premiere episode, it seems that my assumptions were mostly correct - but that's not necessarily a bad thing.
THE GOOD:
* The addition of Aaron Paul as Caleb is welcome; his character is interesting, perfectly cast, and feels like a great window into this new age of WESTWORLD.
* The future world is mostly believable; there are some technologies here that require some suspension of disbelief, but generally this world doesn't seem too distant from our own.
* The opening scene was light on substance, but was a very fun introduction to what the show is about moving forward.
* The duality of Bernard - his ability to activate and deactivate himself at will especially - was cool and very well-utilized. The notion that he is possibly lying to himself and has absolutely no idea, too, was fascinating.
THE HMM:
* As previously mentioned, some of the new technologies are a little hard to swallow. Dolores zooming in on Liam's meeting with her sunglasses and being able to hear the conversation clear as day got a good eye-roll out of me.
* Too many new threads were introduced in this episode. Characters, new and old, thrust into situations without enough explanation given as to their motivations or reasons for being where they are. It felt like an entire episode was just missing.
* Plot armour is a neverending trope in media, and, sadly, WESTWORLD is privy to it too.
* Dialogue has never been one of this show's strong suits; a pretentious program such as this one (I don't mean that in either a good or bad way, that's simply what it is) is always subject to instances of painful dialogue. A lot of lines felt forced and/or overdramatic, which removed me from the world a bit.
THE BAD:
* Poorly structured and poorly paced. PARCE DOMINE features, hazarding a guess, 30 minutes of Caleb, 30 separate minutes of Dolores, 2 minutes of Charlotte, and 5 minutes of Bernard. If Nolan and Joy insisted this be a more simple just-Caleb-and-Dolores premiere, I wouldn't have a problem, but the pacing is disjointed by the occasional cut to someone uninvolved with the main story.
Overall, a slick and engaging finished product that naturally lacks some of the magic that made seasons 1 and 2 feel special. Sharp and entertaining, but not WESTWORLD - but maybe that's not such a bad thing. Season 2 began to collapse underneath its own weight, so it's probably a good idea they decided to shake things up. Give the season more time and I see this becoming just as much a polished and engaging show, if for different reasons than the preceding years.
Doctor Who: The Timeless Children (2020)
SEASON 12: The worst yet; tedious, inconsistent, ill-thought-out, and shocking for all the wrong reasons
DOCTOR WHO has always been and will always continue to be a massively flawed show. I may only personally be familiar with the revived series, but it was true for the Russel T. Davies era, it was true for the Steven Moffat era, and it's true more than ever under the current rule of Chris Chibnall. I thought season 10 was bad, but I'd take 300 episodes of that mush over these 2 seasons Chibnall has brought us thus far. The episodes of seasons 11 and 12 were, on average, just meh, but as an overall package, brought this show to new, superbly dull lows. In season 11, a show afraid of taking risks, focusing only on "returning to its roots" as a children's educational program. In season 12, the most misguided train wreck of a course-correct I've ever had the displeasure of watching unfold before my very eyes - overly complicated, poorly thought out, and massively inconsistent in quality and themes.
To begin on a more positive note, there were episodes in this season I enjoyed. The 2-part SPYFALL opened with a bang and, despite pacing and ambition issues, delivered some of my favourite moments in quite some time. The fan-servicing FUGITIVE OF THE JUDOON was messy, but felt so rewarding as a longtime fan that I didn't really mind. Finally, THE HAUNTING OF VILLA DIODATI was something of a mixed bag, but had more good than bad, with moments that legitimately excited me and some concepts that felt familiar but creative and inspired. Otherwise, the rest of the season was on par with or below the massively mediocre season previous (maybe with the exception of NIKOLA TESLA'S NIGHT OF TERROR and, to a lesser extent, PRAXEUS, which were mostly better than last season as well, but still okay at best).
Unfortunately, the bad far outweighs the good, and, boy, when I say bad, I mean BAD. ORPHAN 55 was an uninspired slog with a hamfisted message that this show wouldn't have touched whatsoever if it wasn't The Hot Issue™ of late. CAN YOU HEAR ME?, despite an excellent concept and one very cool and inspired animated segment of exposition, was an overly-long and tedious wreck. And then, the 2-part finale, ASCENSION OF THE CYBERMEN/THE TIMELESS CHILDREN. Countless other people have expressed my opinions on this drivel (to put it lightly) far better than I ever could, so I'll just say that Chibnall needs to be fired ASAP and replaced with someone who is ACTUALLY COMPETENT. He is ABSOLUTELY UNFIT to be running a show such as this one. He has absolutely NO UNDERSTANDING of good storytelling in the SLIGHTEST.
I've dropped this show before and promised myself that I'd stay on top of it from now on, but that promise is getting harder and harder to keep. The holidays will bring us REVOLUTION OF THE DALEKS, which seems explosive and will apparently bookend the stories of two companions, so - and maybe I'm just naive - I'm cautiously optimistic. A shakeup of any kind is needed to keep this show in any sort of respectable state. I'm nearly done. If REVOLUTION disappoints, I doubt I will return to DOCTOR WHO until Chibnall is dropped.
South Park: Breast Cancer Show Ever (2008)
BREAST CANCER SHOW EVER: Quiet, fascinating, juvenile, genius
Currently watching SOUTH PARK almost completely out of order, only really watching episodes that sound interesting to me. Granted, the reason I chose to watch this episode was mostly due to the funny title, but I was still interested enough to give it a go. What I expected to be an okay-but-nothing-more episode turned out to be one of my favourites of the entire series.
SOUTH PARK has never gotten enough credit for just how smart it can be, and this is mostly due to its juvenile and deliberately offensive nature. I think this dilemma is greatly exemplified in this episode, as - while it may feature Eric eating his underwear and, later, defecating on Ms. Garrison's desk - it also manages to exemplify just how hilarious, disturbing, and overall well-written of a character Eric Cartman really is. Instead of honing in on its staple outrageous, shocking brand of humour - which is still evidently present - this episode chooses to more so be a quiet and reflective study of Eric's character: his delusions, his insecurities, and his inability to ever change. It's a disturbing, thoughtful, and very funny look into a (flanderized for comedic effect) psychotic mind.
Cartman has no understanding of emotion or empathy or basic common courtesy. He only knows what - he thinks - will benefit him. This is showcased countless times throughout the series, but this is one of the show's best cracks at doing so.
In BREAST CANCER SHOW EVER, he pulls the usual tricks as he tries to escape his inevitable humiliation: he tries to fake an apology, but Wendy's not having it; he showcases his absolute lack of respect for anyone, himself included, as he eats his underpants in a form of "bribery"; and gets himself into detention to avoid the fight. In the end, the retribution of his actions is inescapable, and the showdown of Cartman v. Testaburger ends in him broken and bruised, laying bloody in the playground. He believes that everyone's "respect" of him is now gone - of which there actually never was any to begin with - but his incredible ego jumps through impossible imaginary hoops to convince itself that his "status" is untouchable, and everyone loves him no matter what. No one loves him. Everyone he knows would thrive without him, but he thinks that he's their god. He manages to rationalize his inexcusable actions and he goes home, thrilled, without having learned anything.
I don't think my review did it any justice (I'm pretty tired and my writing gets to be pretty messy this time of night), but to put it bluntly: BREAST CANCER SHOW EVER is funny, frightening, and it's some of this show's greatest, most grounded, psychologically thoughtful work yet.
Veep: Fundraiser (2012)
FUNDRAISER: Snappy, fun, easy to watch, led by a recognizable but undistracting cast
I normally wouldn't have written a review for this episode, but seeing it at a lowly 7.3/10 had me very surprised, so here I am. I wasn't sure if VEEP would be to my liking considering how very little I knew about it beforehand, but these worries were quelled nearly immediately. The immediate dry, underplayed chaos left me very entertained, and the cast plays the grounded but funny situations to perfection.
The dialogue comes off as mostly natural, although at times it can seem forced and/or rely too heavily on HBO's lack of censors. A lot of the humour stems from characters being frustrated/displeased with one another, which may come across as repetitive to some, but in my opinion provided constant laughs.
In the characters, Louis-Dreyfus works comedic wonders as the leading woman, Hale plays a toned-down version of his lovable ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT character to great effect, Chlumsky has a surprisingly very entertaining role as a regularly bland character archetype, and Walsh provides the most laughs with his dry and cynical apathy to everyone and everything. The rest of the cast did not have much to work with and as a result are not as strong, but the main four more than make it work anyway.
A complaint I do have is the camerawork, which is often too snappy and varies too wildly in zoom, resulting in a slight sense of motion sickness. However, this hardly takes away from the sharp writing and excellent acting.
In the end, a show I am very glad I decided to try. Not perfect, but much better than I anticipated and as far as I can tell thus far, very underrated. I look forward to watching more.
South Park: White People Renovating Houses (2017)
WHITE PEOPLE RENOVATING HOUSES: Decent targets, but the show forgot to be funny along the way
A) Randy Is Annoying
The show has been pushing Randy to the forefront for a long time now. However, while he was once just a funny occasionally occurring character, he's now become the arguable protagonist of the series, taking his shtick from amusing to downright annoying. His loud, bombastic voice is not pleasant, and the fact that he consistently says stupid things is icing on top of the garbage cake. Stupidity is SOMETIMES funny. Not always. And not consistently.
B) Misery For Misery's Sake Is Not Comedy
This episode's B-plot focuses on Eric and Heidi's relationship that began last season, and how it's emotionally abusive. The only sound that came out of me during this episode was an almost-chuckle at the ironic notion of Eric, the emotional abuser, convincing himself that he is Heidi's victim, and even that is a lot more sad than it is funny. The episode takes a great deal of time to showcase Heidi's falling mental state, but it's really not entertaining. It's simply depressing. If you choose to have someone's misery be a source of comedy, it has to be approached bombastically, so as to distract the viewer from how terrible the situation really would be (think Rickety Cricket from Always Sunny). When you try to extract humour from misery but keep it grounded in reality, as this episode (of a cartoon!!) did, you lose anything that would've made it funny in the first place. The writers want me to laugh at Cartman's delusion and Heidi's misfortune, but I'm just left feeling miserable for both. It really seems that the show has forgotten how to approach big topics with actual effective humour.
Very mediocre premiere.
The Walking Dead: We Are the End of the World (2019)
WE ARE THE END OF THE WORLD: Almost great
My initial reaction to finding out that there would be a Whisperers-only episode was somewhat disappointed; I felt they could spend an episode doing more productive things - of course, seasons of THE WALKING DEAD have always been too long. These worries persisted for a few minutes into the episode, but went away soon enough, shortly after the opening credits came to an end.
THE GOOD
- As much as I may think that the character of Alpha is better suited to a comic book or anime, there is no doubt in my mind that Samantha Morton was the perfect choice to bring her to life. She immerses herself astoundingly well into the identity of Alpha, and the fun she has as she loses herself in the role transpires from the camera to the viewer. A cast highlight, to be sure.
- On a similar note, the level of disturbing and deranged emotion portrayed by Ryan Hurst through a dead and rotting mask is a truly commendable feat.
- The new Whisperer, Gamma, had a somewhat interesting journey throughout this episode. Not only her dilemma with her mentally-broken sister, but also her subsequent rise throughout the hierarchy of the dead. Some questionable acting and writing, but a great concept nonetheless.
- The cinematography, in camerawork, colour scheme, and set design, has seen such an uptick in this season. Nearly every shot in these two episodes have been great to look at. I don't know if the budget was increased or if AMC has employed new directors or what, but whatever the case may be was the right decision to make.
THE BAD
- As always, child actors fail to bring any life to their character.
- In the past timeline, I feel it became somewhat hard to follow. I can only guess why Lydia went off on her own, or who the man in the yellow shirt was meant to be, or exactly what Alpha was talking about throughout the climactic scene, which is either a tribute to poor directing or my own stupidity.
- The delivery of dialogue from Thora Birch (Gamma) and Juliet Brett (Frances) generally left quite a bit to be desired. For whatever reason, they were able to act very well with their eyes, but their vocal performances fell rather flat.
- In the final shot, I knew what I was meant to be seeing due to my own inference, but it took me until the final half-second before the black credits rolled to actually see Alpha and Carol. The shot has so much potential on paper, but a severe lack of contrast between the figures and the scenery made it somewhat dissatisfying.
VERDICT: B-
Some phenomenal ideas somewhat let down by the usual questionable execution lead to an almost-excellent study of the unstable mind that could've been much better.
EDITED ON DEC 12 2019 to reflect my more recent thoughts.
El Camino: A Breaking Bad Movie (2019)
Generally unsure of itself and fails to serve a depth or purpose, but should be rewarding for diehard fans of the show
As a fan of the show (though not nearly as passionate as many others), I was looking forward to this film. Jesse was a constant highlight throughout BREAKING BAD and I figured he deserved a proper sendoff. While Aaron Paul's excellent performance continues to impress, there is little else in this film that is worth 2 hours of your time; this is not to say that EL CAMINO is a bad film - just a mediocre one.
The first half of this film really worried me - it seemed to just jump directly into the action without bothering to set up any sort of narrative or motive. After a few minutes, this worry mostly went away; I was under the impression the film would be about Jesse, Pete, and Badger working to ensure their freedom. However, after the first twenty-or-so minutes, the film completely abandons them, and I was back to feeling lost.
The film continues, for the next forty minutes or so, to focus on the relationship between Jesse and Todd between the events of GRANITE STATE and FELINA, interspersed with 'present-day' scenes of Jesse using his memory of these times to try and find Todd's money, for reasons that aren't made clear to us until much later in the movie. This portion of the film failed to impress in any way, as forced and illogical tension, with the addition of very on-the-nose dialogue from all parties, really drove home what this film really was: shallow fan service.
Following this, the movie has a sharp uptick in quality. Jesse takes his money to Ed (the disappearing man from the very late episodes of the show) and attempts to buy his services once again. For whatever reason, good dialogue, logic, and depth all resurface in this scene, and this level of - I don't want to say excellence, but it's close - continues well into the rest of the film, roughly until the cameo return of Bryan Cranston's Walter White.
At that point, the film sinks comfortably back into its shallow mask, and doesn't quite resurface. The film ends almost jarringly, and just as open-ended as it did in FELINA. At least we know that Jesse is (probably) going to be safe, but it doesn't feel like much of a conclusion. I generally fail to see why this movie exists.
A decent popcorn flick for fans of BREAKING BAD, but if you expect anything close to the excellence and general depth of the series, you're sadly out of luck.
Fear the Walking Dead: Skidmark (2019)
I have finally lost the final ounce of respect I had for this show
The season premiere was incredibly average. Literally nothing of value. The second episode was a slight improvement, but still super awkward and dumb. The third episode was a new low for the show - splitting a revolver bullet off an axe being held by someone's weak, wavy, injured arm in the perfect way as to hit two walkers square in the head at once - enough said. I honestly thought it couldn't get worse. Lmaooooo
This is quite possibly the worst episode of television I've had the absolute displeasure of watching. Literally not one single aspect of this episode was even remotely passable: acting, writing, camerawork, all beyond pathetic.
1. There is no way a cat could be that well-trained, and especially not one that was found in the wild during the god damn zombie apocalypse. You would be led to believe that Daniel was a master cat-trainer before the collapse and did it every day for 45 years, but no cat was ever mentioned until we met this orange plot-moving device a couple of episodes ago. Ridiculous.
2. So Daniel wanted to tell Ofelia that every day is a new day? It's incredibly hard to censor myself because I don't know how else to convey just the absolute stupidity of that whole idea. What did Ofelia ever do or experience to be told by her father that every day is a new day? Why make that the first thing you tell your daughter after being led to believe that she's missing or dead for months? What does every day being a new day have to do with anything that was happening whatsoever during season 3? Jesus Christ, I'm screaming internally.
3. "Lol sorry I shot you in your face and lied to you about your daughter's whereabouts help me tho please lmao"
4. Charlie says to the camera "we have to help him" with the delivery of an iCarly character. You can tell that she wasn't prepared for this scene at all because she shakes her head like 83,000 times in 18 quintillion different directions before saying her line with her eye line passing the camera every single second and with less emotion than a wooden spoon.
5. Every word out of Sarah's mouth is meant to be quick and witty and haha quirky Marvel movie humour, but I can't listen to any sound she makes without retreating into myself like a raisin.
6. On a similar note, Mitchell or whatever the hell his name is (just looked it up: Wendell); what the hell purpose does he serve on this show? Frankly, what the hell purpose does anybody serve on this show? Remove this guy, Sarah, Luciana, Dwight, John, Naomilaurajunelikethemonthhahahahahahaha, the story stays exactly the same.
7. Daniel spouts off cheesy one-liners in Spanish to his cat.
8. These idiot children with the collective acting range and IQ of a rotting blueberry are the worst antagonists in fiction history as far as I'm concerned.
9. The "tense" moments that our group of mental handicaps get into are so incredibly forced and could so easily be resolved or, better yet, avoided entirely if anyone in this show had a positive IQ.
10. So either this is the last we see of Daniel, or he'll be back in the nick of time in a Deus Ex Machina to save our group from "peril" in the future, and frankly, I don't know which would make me hang myself sooner.
I know there's so many more things I had to say but thinking about this episode to such a degree has caused me to become temporarily braindead and I can no longer focus. This is the worst show ever made. See y'all next week
Fear the Walking Dead: ...I Lose Myself (2018)
F the Ear Walking Dead - Season 1, Episode 16: ... I Lose Myself
No joke, I literally had to consistently remind myself that I wasn't watching a Disney movie. The thought popped into my head time and time again, "This is a weird Disney movie." I'm not joking. I honestly wish I was joking. I honestly hope this whole fiasco of trash is a joke. I have never seen a great show fall so quickly and swiftly, and so low down.
When the shot near the end of the episode mirrored the shot of Madison, Strand, Nick, Alicia, and Luciana finding the baseball stadium in "No One's Gone", that's when it hit me. I felt like I just got slapped in the face with the force of 8,000 typhoons. This episode somehow felt more offensive to fans of the original Fear than the deaths of Nick and Madison did. Never have I seen more stupid decisions, more god awful dialogue, more "of-course" moments, more """"""""poetic"""""""" garbage being spewed by characters with so little life or soul in them, more awful cliches and tropes that should've been worn out in the '80s.
I really can not see how the showrunners (Gimple included) can think in their right minds that this is good television, or that these are good characters, or that this is a good story. I always try my best to see how other people might like something even if I don't, and if you personally enjoyed this episode then more power to you, but I can not see any objective bits of merit here. The grey filter remained. The Gimple-ogue remained. The awful characters remained. Everything that made this season awful remained. And a season's build up of going to Alexandria is completely destroyed in one nonchalant sentence ten minutes before the episode's end, in favour of a LITERALLY NEVER-BEFORE HEARD OF DENIM FACTORY.
I don't have closing thoughts. I just needed to rant.
My disappointment is immeasurable and my day is ruined.