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As a child of the eighties, who grew up watching embarrassing sitcoms no one else cared for, knowing all the while no one gave a damn about him, Dallas learned about the ways of life and learned quickly that he had a predilection for being rejected by sexy women.
Living a dull life of seeing the same 600 people over a course of twenty years, and rarely leaving his hometown that he isn’t keen on, Dallas has been sheltered from real life for sixteen years, in some ways bad some ways good, all the while watching tv. Without television he would have nothing to look forward to.
As a college dropout who never really found his niche, because all he cared about was music, sex, and comedy, he has come to realize he maybe isn’t as wonderful as he has been told. Hence the lack of offers.
As a person who liked to believe he was a halfway decent performer, could it be that he is blind to his many defects? Believe me he will not make anything people kick back forty years from now and say “I love that man for what he did.”
Ratings
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Reviews
Passion Before Midnight (2001)
Love it
This movie has my all time favorite sex scene. Oh how I wish I could be having sex with Julia Parton when the phone rings. I love her sexy body and huge boobs.
Batbabe: The Dark Nightie (2009)
I remember this one
Maybe not the best movie I've seen, but I liked it nonetheless.
Late nights of doing what I like seem a long time ago. I liked Darian Caine. It has been five years since it happened. The jerker is ridiculous but good enough for a laugh.
Just the Ten of Us (1987)
Somebody please rerun this show before I forget what it was like....
I always loved this show. It was mostly because of the girls, obviously, but I don't think any sitcom has been as good since. They are probably tired of me harping about how sexy they are and how they're my dream women, but thirty years on and I'd still like to be with a couple of them. Just another bunch of women I'll be fantasizing about but could never have.
The Bikini Carwash Company (1992)
I'd like to see this movie again
I remember this movie from just before I became a teenager. I remember wishing I could hookup with the actresses back before all the sexual harassment stuff started and you could still ask a girl out. As you know it's just a male fantasy movie, but I sure wish women wanted to do stuff like that to me.
The Mummy's Kiss (2003)
One of my favorites
I always loved this movie. Mostly because of Mia and Sasha. I understand perfectly clearly what they're trying to say. It's hard to find your long lost lesbian lover in a world where you always get killed over it. I also understand the Egyptian stuff and the don't attack an evil person stuff.
Coyote Ugly (2000)
Best movie for a while
Of course I liked this movie, mostly for the sexy women in skimpy outfits, but also the songs. At least you can tell they had a good time making the film. I still like to watch it. It's one of those rare theater movies since 2000 where you like it as much as the first time you saw it.