Review of Winterbeast

Winterbeast (1992 Video)
2/10
Hahahahahahahahahahhahahaha
27 April 2000
This is quite simply the most terrible film I have ever seen in my life. That being said, I have seen it several times. Winterbeast is the story of a claymation class project that someone tried to turn into a full-length movie (or at least this is how I understand it). I am not really sure what the plot was, it just seemed to be an excuse to hook together several otherwise unconnected claymation short films. The opening scene must be seen to be believed. This is not even in the "so bad it's good" category, but in a relatively unique category: "must be seen to be believed, and then told about in hushed whispers at parties until you convince other poor buggers to watch the thing."

I rented it on a lark at a video store in Maine, I was not expecting much, but what I got was something very terrible. I sat and watched the opening scene several times in awe of the terrible editing and worse special effects. I still am not entirely sure what happens in the first few minutes, but I do know that it is incredibly fun to watch your friends see it for the first time. From then on, you will simply laugh or gape in amazement at the horrible majesty that this film surrounds itself with. This is the great grandson of Ed Wood, and is possibly even worse than anything produced by the great master of schlock. Don't try to follow the plot, it may make you go insane.

All that being said, if you are a connoisseur of terrible films, you cannot rest without seeing this movie. Force yourself through it, if only be able to claim that you have done so. Then make your friends who think that they are hip enough to like "films so bad they are good" watch this film and sit back and enjoy the reactions. Alcohol is a good way to do this, because it will numb you to the disaster of the film, yet allow you to enjoy your friend's reactions even more thoroughly. This is one of the few films where it is more fun to watch the audience than it is to watch the film.
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