I honestly can't believe I just saw what I've seen described by these other comments.. I want some of the crack these reviewers have been smoking as it's got to have been pretty good to make this head-vomit watchable.. For anyone out of their teens or with a modicum of taste, please ignore any praise heaped on it.. I knew what i was getting into when i rented it.. but i needed to do it just to see how bad they'd taken down what started out as a great franchise with this straight to DVD garbage.. I won't go on about crow 1.. weve all seen that.. good movie, good acting, great soundtrack, great director and the only thing watchable with brandon lee in it. Crow 2.. sullied the name of the first, the only possible reason i could think for this moving getting a lower score than the third one however is that after the first movie people went to see this with understandably high expectations and were very let down. Crow 3 though... I watched it with very low expectations and I wasn't disappointed.. Eric is HORRIBLE as the crow... absolutely without and sort of presence gravitas, meaning, or acting ability whatsoever.. which doesn't help when the script is as bad as it is.. it's like a bad highschool English homework assignment with 10 million dollars thrown at it.
*** spoiler alert *** (even though you should just read the spoilers and save yourself an hour and a half you'll never get back)
Eric just doesn't fit as the crow.. he looks more like a 16 year old crow fan at a "magic the gathering" party.. OK heres the first incredibly stupid point - the guy dies and is horribly burnt.. he comes back as the crow looks in the mirror at his burnt face and starts peeling it off.. leaving a crow face underneath... um excuse me????? the first two were painted on with make up, but this guy has it just fully formed? He then goes on through painful flashbacks (for us not for him) and blahdy blahdy blah.. the bad guys are like a 70's kung fu film.. they all could basically be the same "henchman".. there is no sense of revenge because well.. it's just not written or acted well enough. I just started zoning out and waiting for the kill sequences to make it worth while.. the saving grace that made me think this movie might miraculously pull through was Kirsten Dunst.. but alas.. to no avail. The second very pathetic element is the "king" bad boss, has kind of got the same "evil" girl sidekick but it's totally unexplored, thankfully as it would have been done incredibly clumsily.. but it's still pretty half-assed that this staid looking police chief suddenly appears for no plot driven rhyme or reason to be some person taxidermist... you see.. you have to build that sort of thing up... apparently it's evil porn business money making.. so what in the hell as that got to do with self mutilation and killing people? Go and see the movie for the same reason you might watch someone drown a bag of kittens.. for the curiosity of seeing something get destroyed through callousness and an almost sociopathic disregard for commonsense and good storytelling. Frankly I can only assume the reviewers here are teenagers and probably find the movie easier to like with the younger and improbable cast.. please avoid for the sake of all that is good in the world.
*** spoiler alert *** (even though you should just read the spoilers and save yourself an hour and a half you'll never get back)
Eric just doesn't fit as the crow.. he looks more like a 16 year old crow fan at a "magic the gathering" party.. OK heres the first incredibly stupid point - the guy dies and is horribly burnt.. he comes back as the crow looks in the mirror at his burnt face and starts peeling it off.. leaving a crow face underneath... um excuse me????? the first two were painted on with make up, but this guy has it just fully formed? He then goes on through painful flashbacks (for us not for him) and blahdy blahdy blah.. the bad guys are like a 70's kung fu film.. they all could basically be the same "henchman".. there is no sense of revenge because well.. it's just not written or acted well enough. I just started zoning out and waiting for the kill sequences to make it worth while.. the saving grace that made me think this movie might miraculously pull through was Kirsten Dunst.. but alas.. to no avail. The second very pathetic element is the "king" bad boss, has kind of got the same "evil" girl sidekick but it's totally unexplored, thankfully as it would have been done incredibly clumsily.. but it's still pretty half-assed that this staid looking police chief suddenly appears for no plot driven rhyme or reason to be some person taxidermist... you see.. you have to build that sort of thing up... apparently it's evil porn business money making.. so what in the hell as that got to do with self mutilation and killing people? Go and see the movie for the same reason you might watch someone drown a bag of kittens.. for the curiosity of seeing something get destroyed through callousness and an almost sociopathic disregard for commonsense and good storytelling. Frankly I can only assume the reviewers here are teenagers and probably find the movie easier to like with the younger and improbable cast.. please avoid for the sake of all that is good in the world.