2/10
Disaster Aria
11 February 2005
Warning: Spoilers
The Phantom of the Opera, as a character, is a man whose intense physical ugliness conceals a remarkable spirit—a soul as filled with frightening shadows as it is with glorious light, one which seems to contain both the best and worst aspects of human nature. By contrast, the latest film version of "Phantom of the Opera" is the exact inverse of its title character: it looks nice enough, but that's all there is. Scratch its gilded surface (and there is plenty of gilt to go around) and you find neither passion, nor life, nor soul.

There are those who will argue that this is on a par with the long-running musical which is the film's most direct antecedent, but I would disagree. Andrew Lloyd Webber's mega-blockbuster of a stage show has its flaws (most notably a book that leaves more to the imagination than necessary), but done properly it remains a powerful and effective piece of theater. Alan Jay Lerner said of the story (a truly operatic yarn about a young singer torn between her disfigured impresario and her handsome childhood sweetheart) "it just works," and he's right—but it requires two things in order to do so: a strong director who can handle romantic melodrama without descending into the ridiculous, and a talented and energetic cast to give life to the characters. "Phantom" the film has neither, and as a result comes crashing to earth faster—and sooner—than a certain ill-fated lighting fixture.

Having previously spoiled the legacy of that other masked man, Joel Schumacher steps into the director's chair for "Phantom," and does no favors for it either. Schumacher is clearly attempting to follow in the footsteps of recent movie musical successes "Moulin Rouge" and "Chicago," but he has none of the boundless energy and enthusiasm Baz Luhrman brought to the former, nor the inventive wit and style Rob Marshall infused the latter with. Much of the time, Schumacher seems to borrow from his betters—who in addition to Luhrman and Marshall include James Cameron, Jean Cocteau, David Lynch, Rupert Julian (director of the famous silent version of "Phantom" with Lon Chaney), and Hal Prince (director of the stage version of the musical)—and at one point, even delves into his inferiors by evoking the spirit of Ed Wood. Left to his own devices, he makes so many missteps that I could spend the rest of the review listing them. High on the list: he overplays the sensual undercurrents of "Phantom's" primary love story. This is an element present in the stage version, but while Hal Prince nicely underscored the quasi-sexual tension between Phantom and pupil while maintaining an appropriately Victorian sense of restraint, Schumacher attacks this element with all the grace and subtlety of a Harlequin Romance cover crossed with an MTV music video. You half expect a "wardrobe malfunction" to occur at any moment.

Schumacher is also wildly uneven in his casting, with the weakest link showing up in the place it can least be afforded: the title character. As the Phantom, Gerard Butler struts around, sneers, and swirls his cape, but never comes close to achieving the fine mix of menace, pathos, and mysterious allure that has made the character so intriguing for nearly a century. He also lacks the Phantom's two primary physical characteristics: his hideous face, and his beautiful singing voice. The former (presumably Schumacher's fault for not wanting to make his lead character one iota less attractive than necessary) resembles a moderately bad allergic reaction rather than a disfigurement which would drive a person to madness and isolation; half the time it's impossible to tell that there's anything wrong with him at all. Butler's singing is much more repellent than his looks—his harsh, grating, and over-labored sound makes many of the libretto's high points, particularly the signature song "Music of the Night," a chore to sit through. As Christine, the pretty young thing who fires the Phantom's desires and dementia, Emmy Rossum is a bit easier to listen too (there's little wrong with her voice that cannot be cured with training and maturity), but her thin sound makes it hard to believe her as an operatic sensation, and she never infuses the character with much personality. Only Patrick Wilson, as the dashing aristocrat who forms the third point of this love triangle, shows the level of vocal and acting talent needed to make "Phantom" work, but he's saddled with the story's least interesting character and a poofy wig that would look silly in any other movie, but in comparison with some of the other pompadours in evidence here is downright subdued.

With the three leads unable to carry "Phantom's" emotional and dramatic weight, there's little anyone else can do to salvage it—but a few of the supporting cast members have a go anyway. Miranda Richardson, despite affecting a Pepe le Pew accent, does some good work as a ballet mistress who knows more than she tells. Ciaran Hinds and Simon Callow have a few moments as the opera's beleaguered management, as does Kevin McNally as an ill-fated stagehand. However, Minnie Driver as Carlotta sounds like she came in from a community theater production of "West Side Story" and acts as if she's being paid by decibel (she also uses a voice double for her singing, a practice I normally deplore—though in this case, it might have been advisable for most of the other cast members to follow in her footsteps).

"Phantom of the Opera" is not a complete waste—several of the sets are, as I said, nice enough to look at, and even the mismanagement of director and cast cannot rob the music and story of all their power. There's even some humor to be found, though much of it is unintentional. But of material which has been so successful for so long, much more is expected—and much more should have been given.
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