Is there anything more conniving, more desperate to make a buck, and more putrid than the 3 Ninjas franchise? Here's how it all began: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles became a huge success for young 'uns, as did Home Alone with all its child-hero-kicking-bad-guy-butt glory. Cram those two into the Kid-Flick-o-Matic, and look what comes out onto the plate: 3 Ninjas, complete with pizza and Nickelodeon-friendly villain traps. When the creators captured their already developed audience (I'll be honest, myself included), they raked up what cash they made and grinded out this somehow even less inspired sequel. This was my last 3 Ninjas film. My favorite scene? Sheesh, I've done everything in my power to completely forget this movie, but I vaguely recall middle ninja Colt trying to impress some girl on a street basketball court. I guess that will have to do. I don't want to waste much more time on this gunk, but thanks to 3 Ninjas Kick Back, I learned a valuable lesson at the age of twelve: When Hollywood wants a light snack, nothing beats the taste of gullible children.
Review of 3 Ninjas Kick Back
3 Ninjas Kick Back
(1994)
This way, kids... The pizza's this way... (trap goes off) HA! Gotcha!
15 August 2006