Caffeine (2006)
3/10
Be Caffeine Free
16 May 2008
If screenwriter Dean Craig was a friend of yours you'd be quite hard pressed to find something nice to say (because of course, you could never tell him the truth, which is that Caffeine is a pretty awful movie.

There is a reason why nearly everyone who's commented on the film makes reference to the bad British accents put on by the American actors, most notably Mena Suvari and Mark Pellegrino. What's truly frightening is that the IMDb references the latter as an acting teacher and his performance is the most over-the-top in a film full of forced situations and performances. And this includes Callum Blue who, while adorable, is playing his Mason from "Dead Like Me," which probably would've fine if he'd been given better lines (and situations).

Surprisingly, the most spot-on accent is done by one of the lesser-known actors, actor Mike Vogel (who Dean on "Grounded for Life"). Katherine Heigl's accent is actually not bad (and certainly far superior to Suvari's and Pellegrino's). Roz Witt's, too, is terrible. It was quite smart of Breckin Meyer to just be American.

It's the film's weakest element -- the idea of insisting it be set in a London restaurant, when it could be set anywhere, especially where the weaker American actors could focus on their performances rather than a wobbly accent. Repeatedly throwing in a "bloody," "shag," "knickers," "shat," or "fancy," just isn't enough to effectively establish this as London.

From the opening scene, it's obvious that this was filmed in Los Angeles. Every outdoor shot has the same two old-school Brit Taxi and Double Decker bus passing back and forth. All three vehicles are preserved like they've been borrowed from the Petersen (Car) Museum.

Ah, here's what you could say to Craig -- his actors are very attractive.
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